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Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures u/Oceanundertow Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him I am the dumb dumb mister. positive-memes:Bed time stories
Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures
 u/Oceanundertow
 Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago
 Get startled by phone ringing
 It's one of my players
 Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?"
 Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a
 favor?"
 OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif
 Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot."
 Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick
 story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the
 recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my
 laptop at the office so I can't play them."
 NaniTheFuck.mp3
 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?"
 Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC
 acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess
 Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler."
 Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure."
 Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to
 her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker."
 Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon."
 Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!"
 I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg
 Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS
 ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went
 deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?"
 Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises)
 I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story
 over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she
 eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and
 says he'll see me on game night.
 Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable
 for once. I should have thanked him
 I am the dumb dumb mister.
positive-memes:Bed time stories

positive-memes:Bed time stories

Comfortable, Fresh, and Life: How to be a Teacher in 2019 Make sure the academic, emotional, social, psychological, mental, physical, and nutritional needs of every single student you come into contact with is met...daily. Form deep, personal, caring, loving, but irreproachably professional relationships with each of those students. Do not be their friend. Make sure they know they can come to you at any time for any reason. Hold them to the highest standards of excellence but do not put any undue pressure or expectations on them that might damage their self-esteem or world view. Always give them a pencil, even if you've given them one every day for three marking periods. Put aside standards and tests when national or world issues of importance arise in order to facilitate meaningful, woke conversations that will help strengthen their social emotional learning and empathy. Never talk to them about politics or controversial issues because that could be viewed as trying to force your views on them. Maintain a classroom that is engaging, fun, comfortable, and visually appealing because students won't learn in an environment that they do not enjoy Do not crowd your room with too many overstimulating, colorful, interesting items that distract students from the learning process. Instill a sense of growing independence and self-responsibility in every student while communicating about everything they do in school to their parents daily via email, text, phone calls, newsletters, and blog posts. Focus on real life learning that people really use like bill paying, financial investment, conflict mediation, small appliance repair, etc Make sure all students are proficient on state assessment tests that cover none of those issues. Be prepared at all times to tackle an intruder with a gun or step into the path ofabullet for every student in your building. Be aware that your job is easy because you get summers off. Make sure you come into your classroom several times over the summer to prepare, make copies, and get things ready for next year Be a superhero But don't be too braggy about it. @fun_fresh_ideas How to be a Teacher in 2019 - Fun, Fresh Ideas
Comfortable, Fresh, and Life: How to be a Teacher in 2019
 Make sure the academic, emotional, social, psychological,
 mental, physical, and nutritional needs of every single student
 you come into contact with is met...daily. Form deep, personal,
 caring, loving, but irreproachably professional relationships
 with each of those students. Do not be their friend. Make sure
 they know they can come to you at any time for any reason.
 Hold them to the highest standards of excellence but do not put
 any undue pressure or expectations on them that might damage
 their self-esteem or world view. Always give them a pencil,
 even if you've given them one every day for three marking
 periods. Put aside standards and tests when national or world
 issues of importance arise in order to facilitate meaningful,
 woke conversations that will help strengthen their social
 emotional learning and empathy. Never talk to them about
 politics or controversial issues because that could be viewed as
 trying to force your views on them. Maintain a classroom that is
 engaging, fun, comfortable, and visually appealing because
 students won't learn in an environment that they do not enjoy
 Do not crowd your room with too many overstimulating,
 colorful, interesting items that distract students from the
 learning process. Instill a sense of growing independence and
 self-responsibility in every student while communicating about
 everything they do in school to their parents daily via email,
 text, phone calls, newsletters, and blog posts. Focus on real life
 learning that people really use like bill paying, financial
 investment, conflict mediation, small appliance repair, etc
 Make sure all students are proficient on state assessment tests
 that cover none of those issues. Be prepared at all times to
 tackle an intruder with a gun or step into the path ofabullet for
 every student in your building. Be aware that your job is easy
 because you get summers off. Make sure you come into your
 classroom several times over the summer to prepare, make
 copies, and get things ready for next year
 Be a superhero
 But don't be too braggy about it.
 @fun_fresh_ideas
How to be a Teacher in 2019 - Fun, Fresh Ideas

How to be a Teacher in 2019 - Fun, Fresh Ideas