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Anaconda, Andrew Bogut, and Bored: Kate Crawford @katecrawford Following Meanwhile, Amazon's latest patent is for Alexa to detect when people are sick, bored or unhappy. "Alexa would listen out for if users are crying and then class them as experiencing an "emotional abnormality telegraph.co.uk/technology/201 132 130 Alexa, "cough I'm hung sniffle 120 100 Would you lke a recipe for chicken soup? No, thanks 134 Ok, I can find you something else. By the way, would you like o order cough drops with 1 hour delivery? That wouki be awesome Thanks for asking! 110 No probiem. Pil email you an order confirmation. Feel better! 7:54 AM 10 Oct 2018 570 Retweets 655 Likes imaginedsoldier: the-tired-tenor: tankies: Me: *crying* Alexa: This seems sad, now playing Despacito Y’all need to have a greater degree of 1- healthy suspicion in Alexa and corporate surveillance devices personal assistants, and 2- understanding of how dangerous this kind of algorithm is in the hands of a multinational company (and anyone for that matter.)  To begin with, that data is both available for sale and able to be subpoenaed by the government. Alexa’s records and recordings have already been used in criminal trials. In the US, a digital record of your emotional patterns can be used to deny you housing, jobs, and to rule on your ability to exercise your basic rights. Consider that psychiatric stigma and misdiagnosis can already be wielded against you in legal disputes and the notion of a listening device capable of identifying signs of distress for the purpose of marketing to you should be made more clearly concerning.  Moreover we have already seen the use of algorithms like this on Facebook and other “self-reporting” (read: user input) sites capable of identifying the onset of a manic episode [1] [2] [3], which have been subsequently been linked to identifying vulnerable (high-spending) periods to target ads at these users, perhaps most famously in selling tickets to Vegas (identified in a TedTalk by  techno-sociological scholar Zeynep Tufekci where she more generally discusses algorithms and how they shape our online experiences to suggest and reinforce biases).  The notes on this post are super concerning- we are being marketed to under the guise of having our emotional needs attended to by the same people who inflicted that emptiness on us, and everyone is just memeing.
Anaconda, Andrew Bogut, and Bored: Kate Crawford
 @katecrawford
 Following
 Meanwhile, Amazon's latest patent is for
 Alexa to detect when people are sick, bored
 or unhappy. "Alexa would listen out for if
 users are crying and then class them as
 experiencing an "emotional abnormality
 telegraph.co.uk/technology/201
 132
 130
 Alexa, "cough I'm hung
 sniffle
 120
 100
 Would you lke a recipe for
 chicken soup?
 No, thanks
 134
 Ok, I can find you something
 else. By the way, would you like
 o order cough drops with 1 hour
 delivery?
 That wouki be awesome
 Thanks for asking!
 110
 No probiem. Pil email you an
 order confirmation. Feel better!
 7:54 AM 10 Oct 2018
 570 Retweets 655 Likes
imaginedsoldier:

the-tired-tenor:

tankies:


Me: *crying*
Alexa: This seems sad, now playing Despacito

Y’all need to have a greater degree of 1- healthy suspicion in Alexa and corporate surveillance devices personal assistants, and 2- understanding of how dangerous this kind of algorithm is in the hands of a multinational company (and anyone for that matter.) 
To begin with, that data is both available for sale and able to be subpoenaed by the government. Alexa’s records and recordings have already been used in criminal trials. In the US, a digital record of your emotional patterns can be used to deny you housing, jobs, and to rule on your ability to exercise your basic rights. Consider that psychiatric stigma and misdiagnosis can already be wielded against you in legal disputes and the notion of a listening device capable of identifying signs of distress for the purpose of marketing to you should be made more clearly concerning. 
Moreover we have already seen the use of algorithms like this on Facebook and other “self-reporting” (read: user input) sites capable of identifying the onset of a manic episode [1] [2] [3], which have been subsequently been linked to identifying vulnerable (high-spending) periods to target ads at these users, perhaps most famously in selling tickets to Vegas (identified in a TedTalk by  techno-sociological scholar Zeynep Tufekci where she more generally discusses algorithms and how they shape our online experiences to suggest and reinforce biases). 
The notes on this post are super concerning- we are being marketed to under the guise of having our emotional needs attended to by the same people who inflicted that emptiness on us, and everyone is just memeing.

imaginedsoldier: the-tired-tenor: tankies: Me: *crying* Alexa: This seems sad, now playing Despacito Y’all need to have a greater degre...

Bodies , Books, and Click: WATCH LIVE Senate confirms Brett Kavanaugh to the US Supreme Court NNIU.S. World Politics Business Opinion Health Entertainment| Style | Travel Sports Video Live TV | U.S. Edition + KAVANAUGH CONFIRMED HUFFPOSTI EDITION BREAKING NEWS SUPREME FARCE: KAV CONFIRMED set station npr shop sign in news arts&life music topics programs & podcasts BREAKING NEWS Hon. Bret M.Kavanaugh Win McNamee/Getty Images POLITICS Kavanaugh Confirmed To Supreme Court The federal appeals court judge was confirmed after a narrow Senate vote largely along party lines Saturday afternoon that ended a weeks-long battle over his controversial nomination. Demonstrators Gather At U.S. Capitol In Anticipation Of Kavanaugh's Confirmation BBC Sign in News SportWeather Shop Earth Travel NEWS Home Video World US&Canada UK Business Tech ScienceStories Ent US & Canada Brett Kavanaugh nomination: Victory for Trump in Supreme Court vote 6 minutes ago Share E a ESPAÑOL 中文(CHINESE) ENGLISH SUBSCRIBE NOW LOG IN The VewHork Times Saturday, October 6, 2018 Today's Paper World U.S Politics N.Y. Business Opinion Tech Science Health Sports Arts Books Style Food Travel Magazine Magazine Real Estate Video Got a confidential news tip? Do you have the next big story? Share it with our journalists. S.&P 500 Sign Up for 'Weeknight Recipes' Face down a busy week by cooking a big batch of chili 55 F 55 52 Dow Senate Confirms Kavanaugh 50-48, After Bitter Partisan Battle A deeply divided Senate voted on Saturday to confirm Judge Brett M Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court, delivering a victory to President Trump and ending a rancorous Washington battle. Majority of votes needed YES NO Pres. Republicans 4901 Democrats 1 48 O Total 50 48 1 The final result was expected; all senators had announced their intentions by Friday, after the nomination cleared a crucial procedural hurdle. The Vote Count This is how each senator voted on the Supreme Court nomination of Judge Brett Kavanaugh. Just Now Bitter Tenor of Senate Reflects a Nation at Odds With Itself The battle over the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh has exposed a climate of partisan distrust rivaled by few other moments in the recent past. 2h ago 6m ago Click to Listen After a highly contentious nomination process, senators deliver the final vote on the confirmation of Judge Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court. Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images scribbledsilence: A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty. A woman came forward with her allegations after years of getting therapy for the trauma she had experienced as a child. A woman came forward despite how scared she was to face her assaulter in front of a nation. A woman came forward and made a testament in front of a committee as the whole world watch, despite the hate and death threats she was getting. A woman came forward and spoke up about her assault, about what her accuser had done in detail, and had thousands upon thousands of people standing by her. Supporting her. Believing her. And yet, many people still did not listen. many people still called her a liar. many people still threatened her. many people still supported her abuser. many people still believed the word of a man over the word of a woman. Of a victim. Next time you think men are the victims and women have everything to gain by speaking up about their assault, please explain to me when you have ever seen that to be the case. All I see is that a women spoke up about her sexual assault, and yet she was pushed aside and ignored as her abuser was granted a lifetime position in the highest court in the country. All I see is an abuser has been appointed to a position in which he would be able to further control women and their rights to their own bodies. All I see is another reason why women are so frightened to and believe that they shouldn’t speak up about their assault. Because it wouldn’t matter. Because nothing would happened. Because you failed her.
Bodies , Books, and Click: WATCH LIVE
 Senate confirms Brett Kavanaugh to the US Supreme Court
 NNIU.S. World Politics Business Opinion Health Entertainment| Style | Travel Sports Video
 Live TV
 | U.S. Edition +
 KAVANAUGH CONFIRMED

 HUFFPOSTI
 EDITION
 BREAKING NEWS
 SUPREME FARCE:
 KAV CONFIRMED

 set station npr shop
 sign in
 news arts&life music topics programs & podcasts
 BREAKING NEWS
 Hon. Bret M.Kavanaugh
 Win McNamee/Getty Images
 POLITICS
 Kavanaugh Confirmed To Supreme Court
 The federal appeals court judge was confirmed after a narrow Senate vote largely along party lines Saturday afternoon
 that ended a weeks-long battle over his controversial nomination.
 Demonstrators Gather At U.S. Capitol In Anticipation Of Kavanaugh's Confirmation

 BBC
 Sign in
 News SportWeather Shop Earth Travel
 NEWS
 Home Video World US&Canada UK Business Tech ScienceStories Ent
 US & Canada
 Brett Kavanaugh nomination: Victory for
 Trump in Supreme Court vote
 6 minutes ago
 Share

 E a
 ESPAÑOL
 中文(CHINESE)
 ENGLISH
 SUBSCRIBE NOW
 LOG IN
 The VewHork Times
 Saturday, October 6, 2018
 Today's Paper
 World U.S Politics N.Y. Business Opinion Tech Science Health Sports Arts Books Style Food Travel Magazine Magazine Real Estate Video
 Got a confidential news tip?
 Do you have the next big story? Share it with our
 journalists.
 S.&P 500
 Sign Up for 'Weeknight Recipes'
 Face down a busy week by cooking a big batch of chili
 55 F 55 52
 Dow
 Senate Confirms Kavanaugh 50-48, After Bitter Partisan Battle
 A deeply divided Senate voted on
 Saturday to confirm Judge Brett M
 Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court,
 delivering a victory to President Trump
 and ending a rancorous Washington
 battle.
 Majority of
 votes needed YES NO Pres.
 Republicans 4901
 Democrats 1 48 O
 Total 50 48 1
 The final result was expected; all
 senators had announced their
 intentions by Friday, after the
 nomination cleared a crucial procedural
 hurdle.
 The Vote Count
 This is how each senator
 voted on the Supreme
 Court nomination of Judge
 Brett Kavanaugh.
 Just Now
 Bitter Tenor of Senate
 Reflects a Nation at
 Odds With Itself
 The battle over the
 confirmation of Brett
 Kavanaugh has exposed a
 climate of partisan distrust
 rivaled by few other
 moments in the recent past.
 2h ago
 6m ago
 Click to Listen
 After a highly contentious nomination process, senators deliver the final vote on the confirmation
 of Judge Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court. Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
scribbledsilence:
A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty.
A woman came forward with her allegations after years of getting therapy for the trauma she had experienced as a child.
A woman came forward despite how scared she was to face her assaulter in front of a nation.
A woman came forward and made a testament in front of a committee as the whole world watch, despite the hate and death threats she was getting.
A woman came forward and spoke up about her assault, about what her accuser had done in detail, and had thousands upon thousands of people standing by her. Supporting her. Believing her.
And yet,
many people still did not listen.
many people still called her a liar.
many people still threatened her.
many people still supported her abuser.
many people still believed the word of a man over the word of a woman. Of a victim.
Next time you think men are the victims and women have everything to gain by speaking up about their assault, please explain to me when you have ever seen that to be the case.
All I see is that a women spoke up about her sexual assault, and yet she was pushed aside and ignored as her abuser was granted a lifetime position in the highest court in the country.
All I see is an abuser has been appointed to a position in which he would be able to further control women and their rights to their own bodies.


All I see is another reason why women are so frightened to and believe that they shouldn’t speak up about their assault.
Because it wouldn’t matter.
Because nothing would happened.
Because you failed her.

scribbledsilence: A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty. A woman came forward w...

Bodies , Books, and Click: WATCH LIVE Senate confirms Brett Kavanaugh to the US Supreme Court NNIU.S. World Politics Business Opinion Health Entertainment| Style | Travel Sports Video Live TV | U.S. Edition + KAVANAUGH CONFIRMED HUFFPOSTI EDITION BREAKING NEWS SUPREME FARCE: KAV CONFIRMED set station npr shop sign in news arts&life music topics programs & podcasts BREAKING NEWS Hon. Bret M.Kavanaugh Win McNamee/Getty Images POLITICS Kavanaugh Confirmed To Supreme Court The federal appeals court judge was confirmed after a narrow Senate vote largely along party lines Saturday afternoon that ended a weeks-long battle over his controversial nomination. Demonstrators Gather At U.S. Capitol In Anticipation Of Kavanaugh's Confirmation BBC Sign in News SportWeather Shop Earth Travel NEWS Home Video World US&Canada UK Business Tech ScienceStories Ent US & Canada Brett Kavanaugh nomination: Victory for Trump in Supreme Court vote 6 minutes ago Share E a ESPAÑOL 中文(CHINESE) ENGLISH SUBSCRIBE NOW LOG IN The VewHork Times Saturday, October 6, 2018 Today's Paper World U.S Politics N.Y. Business Opinion Tech Science Health Sports Arts Books Style Food Travel Magazine Magazine Real Estate Video Got a confidential news tip? Do you have the next big story? Share it with our journalists. S.&P 500 Sign Up for 'Weeknight Recipes' Face down a busy week by cooking a big batch of chili 55 F 55 52 Dow Senate Confirms Kavanaugh 50-48, After Bitter Partisan Battle A deeply divided Senate voted on Saturday to confirm Judge Brett M Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court, delivering a victory to President Trump and ending a rancorous Washington battle. Majority of votes needed YES NO Pres. Republicans 4901 Democrats 1 48 O Total 50 48 1 The final result was expected; all senators had announced their intentions by Friday, after the nomination cleared a crucial procedural hurdle. The Vote Count This is how each senator voted on the Supreme Court nomination of Judge Brett Kavanaugh. Just Now Bitter Tenor of Senate Reflects a Nation at Odds With Itself The battle over the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh has exposed a climate of partisan distrust rivaled by few other moments in the recent past. 2h ago 6m ago Click to Listen After a highly contentious nomination process, senators deliver the final vote on the confirmation of Judge Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court. Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images scribbledsilence: A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty.A woman came forward with her allegations after years of getting therapy for the trauma she had experienced as a child.A woman came forward despite how scared she was to face her assaulter in front of a nation.A woman came forward and made a testament in front of a committee as the whole world watch, despite the hate and death threats she was getting.A woman came forward and spoke up about her assault, about what her accuser had done in detail, and had thousands upon thousands of people standing by her. Supporting her. Believing her.And yet,many people still did not listen.many people still called her a liar.many people still threatened her.many people still supported her abuser.many people still believed the word of a man over the word of a woman. Of a victim.Next time you think men are the victims and women have everything to gain by speaking up about their assault, please explain to me when you have ever seen that to be the case.All I see is that a women spoke up about her sexual assault, and yet she was pushed aside and ignored as her abuser was granted a lifetime position in the highest court in the country.All I see is an abuser has been appointed to a position in which he would be able to further control women and their rights to their own bodies. All I see is another reason why women are so frightened to and believe that they shouldn’t speak up about their assault.Because it wouldn’t matter.Because nothing would happened.Because you failed her. A woman came forward with an accusation she had absolutely no way of backing up.People did listen. They gave her a congressional hearing for fucks sake, an opportunity I might add she almost refused.She could not prove her claims. People she claimed were witnesses said they had no recollection of the event she put forward. Literally nothing she presented was evidence of any sort and her story was fraught with inconsistencies and vague details.Another woman came forward with a story even more completely uncorroborated. She was so unsure it was even Kavanagh who assaulted her that it took almost a week for her to convince herself it was him, and once again nobody remembers a thing.An investigation was made, people weighed the lack of evidence and determined that there was no cause to prevent the man from taking the job because we still live in a country where you should be viewed as innocent unless there’s actual evidence of your guilt.It’s not that deep.
Bodies , Books, and Click: WATCH LIVE
 Senate confirms Brett Kavanaugh to the US Supreme Court
 NNIU.S. World Politics Business Opinion Health Entertainment| Style | Travel Sports Video
 Live TV
 | U.S. Edition +
 KAVANAUGH CONFIRMED

 HUFFPOSTI
 EDITION
 BREAKING NEWS
 SUPREME FARCE:
 KAV CONFIRMED

 set station npr shop
 sign in
 news arts&life music topics programs & podcasts
 BREAKING NEWS
 Hon. Bret M.Kavanaugh
 Win McNamee/Getty Images
 POLITICS
 Kavanaugh Confirmed To Supreme Court
 The federal appeals court judge was confirmed after a narrow Senate vote largely along party lines Saturday afternoon
 that ended a weeks-long battle over his controversial nomination.
 Demonstrators Gather At U.S. Capitol In Anticipation Of Kavanaugh's Confirmation

 BBC
 Sign in
 News SportWeather Shop Earth Travel
 NEWS
 Home Video World US&Canada UK Business Tech ScienceStories Ent
 US & Canada
 Brett Kavanaugh nomination: Victory for
 Trump in Supreme Court vote
 6 minutes ago
 Share

 E a
 ESPAÑOL
 中文(CHINESE)
 ENGLISH
 SUBSCRIBE NOW
 LOG IN
 The VewHork Times
 Saturday, October 6, 2018
 Today's Paper
 World U.S Politics N.Y. Business Opinion Tech Science Health Sports Arts Books Style Food Travel Magazine Magazine Real Estate Video
 Got a confidential news tip?
 Do you have the next big story? Share it with our
 journalists.
 S.&P 500
 Sign Up for 'Weeknight Recipes'
 Face down a busy week by cooking a big batch of chili
 55 F 55 52
 Dow
 Senate Confirms Kavanaugh 50-48, After Bitter Partisan Battle
 A deeply divided Senate voted on
 Saturday to confirm Judge Brett M
 Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court,
 delivering a victory to President Trump
 and ending a rancorous Washington
 battle.
 Majority of
 votes needed YES NO Pres.
 Republicans 4901
 Democrats 1 48 O
 Total 50 48 1
 The final result was expected; all
 senators had announced their
 intentions by Friday, after the
 nomination cleared a crucial procedural
 hurdle.
 The Vote Count
 This is how each senator
 voted on the Supreme
 Court nomination of Judge
 Brett Kavanaugh.
 Just Now
 Bitter Tenor of Senate
 Reflects a Nation at
 Odds With Itself
 The battle over the
 confirmation of Brett
 Kavanaugh has exposed a
 climate of partisan distrust
 rivaled by few other
 moments in the recent past.
 2h ago
 6m ago
 Click to Listen
 After a highly contentious nomination process, senators deliver the final vote on the confirmation
 of Judge Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court. Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
scribbledsilence:

A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty.A woman came forward with her allegations after years of getting therapy for the trauma she had experienced as a child.A woman came forward despite how scared she was to face her assaulter in front of a nation.A woman came forward and made a testament in front of a committee as the whole world watch, despite the hate and death threats she was getting.A woman came forward and spoke up about her assault, about what her accuser had done in detail, and had thousands upon thousands of people standing by her. Supporting her. Believing her.And yet,many people still did not listen.many people still called her a liar.many people still threatened her.many people still supported her abuser.many people still believed the word of a man over the word of a woman. Of a victim.Next time you think men are the victims and women have everything to gain by speaking up about their assault, please explain to me when you have ever seen that to be the case.All I see is that a women spoke up about her sexual assault, and yet she was pushed aside and ignored as her abuser was granted a lifetime position in the highest court in the country.All I see is an abuser has been appointed to a position in which he would be able to further control women and their rights to their own bodies.

All I see is another reason why women are so frightened to and believe that they shouldn’t speak up about their assault.Because it wouldn’t matter.Because nothing would happened.Because you failed her.

A woman came forward with an accusation she had absolutely no way of backing up.People did listen. They gave her a congressional hearing for fucks sake, an opportunity I might add she almost refused.She could not prove her claims. People she claimed were witnesses said they had no recollection of the event she put forward. Literally nothing she presented was evidence of any sort and her story was fraught with inconsistencies and vague details.Another woman came forward with a story even more completely uncorroborated. She was so unsure it was even Kavanagh who assaulted her that it took almost a week for her to convince herself it was him, and once again nobody remembers a thing.An investigation was made, people weighed the lack of evidence and determined that there was no cause to prevent the man from taking the job because we still live in a country where you should be viewed as innocent unless there’s actual evidence of your guilt.It’s not that deep.

scribbledsilence: A woman came forward and pointed out her assaulter because she believed that it was her civic duty.A woman came forward w...

Music, Regret, and School: NEW MUSIC TERMS ALLEREGRETTO: When you're 16 measures into the piece and suddenly realize you set too fast a tempo ANGUS DEl: To play with a divinely beefy tone A PATELLA: Accompanied by knee-slapping APOLOGGIATURA: A composition that you regret playing APPROXIMATURA: A series of notes not intended by the composer, yet played with an "I meant to do that" attitude APPROXIMENTO: A musical entrance that is somewhere in the vicinity of the correct pitch DILL PICCOLINI: An exceedingly small wind instrument that plays only sour notes FERMANTRA: A note held over and over and over and over and... FIDDLER CRABS: Grumpý string players FLUTE FLIES: Those tiny insects that bother musicians on outdoor gigs FRUGALHORN: A sensible and inexpensive brass instrument GAUL BLATTER: A French horn player GREGORIAN CHAMP: The title bestowed upon the monk who can hold a note the longest PLACEBO DOMINGO: A faux tenor SPRITZICATO: An indication to string instruments to produce a bright and bubbly sound TEMPO TANTRUM: What an elementary school orchestra is having when it's not following the conductor <p><a href="http://thestrugglesofamusicmajor.tumblr.com/post/161394990940/professorsparklepants-tag-yourself-im-angus-dei" class="tumblr_blog">thestrugglesofamusicmajor</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://professorsparklepants.tumblr.com/post/160964519730/tag-yourself-im-angus-dei" class="tumblr_blog">professorsparklepants</a>:</p> <blockquote><p>Tag yourself I’m Angus Dei</p></blockquote> <p>I’m Fiddler Crabs</p> </blockquote>
Music, Regret, and School: NEW MUSIC TERMS
 ALLEREGRETTO: When you're 16 measures into the piece
 and suddenly realize you set too fast a tempo
 ANGUS DEl: To play with a divinely beefy tone
 A PATELLA: Accompanied by knee-slapping
 APOLOGGIATURA: A composition that you regret playing
 APPROXIMATURA: A series of notes not intended by the
 composer, yet played with an "I meant to do that" attitude
 APPROXIMENTO: A musical entrance that is somewhere in
 the vicinity of the correct pitch
 DILL PICCOLINI: An exceedingly small wind instrument that
 plays only sour notes
 FERMANTRA: A note held over and over and over and over
 and...
 FIDDLER CRABS: Grumpý string players
 FLUTE FLIES: Those tiny insects that bother musicians on
 outdoor gigs
 FRUGALHORN: A sensible and inexpensive brass instrument
 GAUL BLATTER: A French horn player
 GREGORIAN CHAMP: The title bestowed upon the monk who
 can hold a note the longest
 PLACEBO DOMINGO: A faux tenor
 SPRITZICATO: An indication to string instruments to produce a
 bright and bubbly sound
 TEMPO TANTRUM: What an elementary school orchestra is
 having when it's not following the conductor
<p><a href="http://thestrugglesofamusicmajor.tumblr.com/post/161394990940/professorsparklepants-tag-yourself-im-angus-dei" class="tumblr_blog">thestrugglesofamusicmajor</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://professorsparklepants.tumblr.com/post/160964519730/tag-yourself-im-angus-dei" class="tumblr_blog">professorsparklepants</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>Tag yourself I’m Angus Dei</p></blockquote>
<p>I’m Fiddler Crabs</p>
</blockquote>

thestrugglesofamusicmajor: professorsparklepants: Tag yourself I’m Angus Dei I’m Fiddler Crabs

Fake, Love, and Music: HOW ABOUT soft mallets 8 JUST DON'T PLAY infood Fun Story My drector kept teling me and m tenor sax buddy bo play softer No matter what my buddy Done play this time Just fake Our Band Director then nfoemed us we sounded perfect To my readers p means quiet pp means realy quiet Ive never seen On the contrast f means loud, and ttir probably means so loud you go I had fl in a pece once and my conductor told me to play as oudly as physicaly possièle without faling off my char Me and my trombone buddes had and he sat next to me and played so hard that he tel out of tis The lengths we go for music Okay yeah so Eplay the bass claninet and he amount of air you have to move and the stiftness of the reed means only has two setings and that is loud and louder wth an optional LOUDEST th ncludes a 60% probatakty of HORRELE CROAKİNG NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiqutous clarinet One day, when Iwas n concert band in high school we got a new piece handed out for the frst time, and there was a strange itte commotion back in the tuba section whisperning and peinsng at something in the music, and swatting at each other's hands at shhh dont cal attendion toe And wthough they dd aract the atention of basicaly everyone else in the band, they managed t avoid being noticed by the band drector, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then sad Al nght let's run through tup to sectionA And here we are cheerfuly playing along sounding reasonably competent-but everyone, when they have the tention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players They dant come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see Istfled geging reeeeeealy deep breath ICOLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when hasnt actuary been cued to sap The band drector doesnt even say anything just looks straight back the tubas and makes a helpless sot of sby gesture h unison, the luba players defend themselves THERE WERE FOURFS FFFF is not realy a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for ithe love of al tha s holy why would you put in a fuba part This is the best band post Everyone else go home Oh man so I play brombone, and we got this piece caled Florentiner Marsch by aus Fuck, and we saw which is 8 fortes We were shocked u har is 24 fortes who the tuck des that This guy. Take a good look-that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose ulus IdontgvaFucik More ise Julus Fuckt ppp and fff
Fake, Love, and Music: HOW ABOUT
 soft mallets
 8
 JUST DON'T PLAY
 infood
 Fun Story My drector
 kept teling me and m
 tenor sax buddy bo play
 softer No matter what
 my buddy Done play
 this time Just fake
 Our Band Director then
 nfoemed us we
 sounded perfect
 To my readers p means
 quiet pp means realy
 quiet Ive never seen
 On the contrast f means
 loud, and ttir probably
 means so loud you go
 I had fl in a pece once and my
 conductor told me to play as
 oudly as physicaly possièle
 without faling off my char
 Me and my trombone buddes had
 and he sat next to me and
 played so hard that he tel out of tis
 The lengths we go for music
 Okay yeah so Eplay the bass claninet and
 he amount of air you have to move and
 the stiftness of the reed means only
 has two setings and that is loud and
 louder wth an optional LOUDEST th
 ncludes a 60% probatakty of HORRELE
 CROAKİNG NOISE which is the bass
 equivalent of the ubiqutous clarinet
 One day, when Iwas n concert band in high
 school we got a new piece handed out for the
 frst time, and there was a strange itte
 commotion back in the tuba section
 whisperning and peinsng at something in the
 music, and swatting at each other's hands at
 shhh dont cal attendion toe And wthough
 they dd aract the atention of basicaly
 everyone else in the band, they managed t
 avoid being noticed by the band drector, who
 gave us a few minutes to look over our parts
 and then sad Al nght let's run through tup
 to sectionA
 And here we are cheerfuly playing along
 sounding reasonably competent-but
 everyone, when they have the tention to
 spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players
 They dant come in for the first eight
 measures or so, and then when they do
 come in, what we see
 Istfled geging
 reeeeeealy deep breath
 ICOLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE
 The entire band stops dead, in the
 cacophonous kind of way that a band stops
 when hasnt actuary been cued to sap The
 band drector doesnt even say anything just
 looks straight back the tubas and makes a
 helpless sot of sby gesture
 h unison, the luba players defend
 themselves THERE WERE FOURFS
 FFFF is not realy a rational dynamic marking
 for any instrument, but for ithe love of al tha
 s holy why would you put in a fuba part
 This is the best band post
 Everyone else go home
 Oh man so I play brombone, and we got this piece
 caled Florentiner Marsch by aus Fuck, and we saw
 which is 8 fortes We were shocked u
 har is 24 fortes who the tuck des that
 This guy. Take a good look-that is the moustache of a
 man with nothing to lose
 ulus IdontgvaFucik
 More ise Julus Fuckt
ppp and fff

ppp and fff

Fake, God, and Love: Source housecatinca Mach 12th 2014 34617am-13 hours ag HOW ABOUT 76 soft mallets 93 IJUST DON'T PLAY vivelafas elsaieni Fun Story My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we dd, t wasn't soft enough for him So getting frustrated, I told my buddy "Dont play his tme Just fake i Our Band Director then sounded perfect To my readers p means qiet pp means realy quiet. I've never seen pppp before haha On the contrast, means loud ard ㅠ probably means so loud you go I had ftt in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible wthout faling off my char Me and my trombone buddies had r and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fel out of his The lengths we go for music Okay yeah soI play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stitness of the reed means t only has two settings and that is loud and louder, wih an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probabilty of HORR LE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiqunous clarinet shriek One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange litle commotion back in the buba section whispering and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other's hands a shhh dont call attention to it And athough they did atract the atention off basically everyone else in the band they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, wh gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said. "All night, let's nun through tup to section A And here we are, cheerfully playing along sounding reasonably competent-but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players They dont come in for the first eight measures or so and then when they do come in, what we see is [stfed gggingl reeeeeeally deep breat ICOLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasnt actualy been cued to stop The band director doesnt even say anything just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture In unison, the tuba players defend themseves: THERE WERE FOUR FS FFFF is not realy a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of al mat s holy why would you put it in a tuba part This is the best band post Everyone else go home Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece caled Florentiner Marsch by Juius Fucik, and we sauw his which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until hat is 24 fortes who the fuck does that Who does that? This guy. Take a good look- that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose Julius IdontgivaFuck More like Julus Fuckt WHAT IS THIS IVE NEVER SEEN THE LAST TWO STORIES OH MY GO D 247 WHT IS THE GOD DAMN POINTAM SO UPSET DO YOU WANT FUICKING CHINA USTENING TO YOUR CONCERT BECAUSEGUESS WHAT THAT IS WHAT YOURE GOING TO GE FUCK WAS THAT IT WAS THE TROMBONISTSTHEYRE COMING THERE IS NO ESCAPE Pyrozod's tags for this were too hlanious not to share You need to check out FUNSubstance.com XD XD XD XD
Fake, God, and Love: Source housecatinca
 Mach 12th 2014 34617am-13 hours ag
 HOW ABOUT
 76
 soft mallets
 93
 IJUST DON'T PLAY
 vivelafas
 elsaieni
 Fun Story My director
 kept telling me and my
 tenor sax buddy to play
 softer. No matter what
 we dd, t wasn't soft
 enough for him So
 getting frustrated, I told
 my buddy "Dont play
 his tme Just fake i
 Our Band Director then
 sounded perfect
 To my readers p means
 qiet pp means realy
 quiet. I've never seen
 pppp before haha
 On the contrast, means
 loud ard ㅠ probably
 means so loud you go
 I had ftt in a piece once and my
 conductor told me to play as
 loudly as physically possible
 wthout faling off my char
 Me and my trombone buddies had
 r and he sat next to me and
 played so hard that he fel out of his
 The lengths we go for music
 Okay yeah soI play the bass clarinet and
 the amount of air you have to move and
 the stitness of the reed means t only
 has two settings and that is loud and
 louder, wih an optional LOUDEST that
 includes a 50% probabilty of HORR
 LE
 CROAKING NOISE which is the bass
 equivalent of the ubiqunous clarinet
 shriek
 One day, when I was in concert band in high
 school, we got a new piece handed out for the
 first time, and there was a strange litle
 commotion back in the buba section
 whispering and pointing at something in the
 music, and swatting at each other's hands a
 shhh dont call attention to it And athough
 they did atract the atention off basically
 everyone else in the band they managed to
 avoid being noticed by the band director, wh
 gave us a few minutes to look over our parts
 and then said. "All night, let's nun through tup
 to section A
 And here we are, cheerfully playing along
 sounding reasonably competent-but
 everyone, when they have the attention to
 spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players
 They dont come in for the first eight
 measures or so and then when they do
 come in, what we see is
 [stfed gggingl
 reeeeeeally deep breat
 ICOLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE
 The entire band stops dead, in the
 cacophonous kind of way that a band stops
 when it hasnt actualy been cued to stop The
 band director doesnt even say anything just
 looks straight back at the tubas and makes a
 helpless sort of why gesture
 In unison, the tuba players defend
 themseves: THERE WERE FOUR FS
 FFFF is not realy a rational dynamic marking
 for any instrument, but for the love of al mat
 s holy why would you put it in a tuba part
 This is the best band post
 Everyone else go home
 Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece
 caled Florentiner Marsch by Juius Fucik, and we sauw
 his
 which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until
 hat is 24 fortes who the fuck does that
 Who does that?
 This guy. Take a good look- that is the moustache of a
 man with nothing to lose
 Julius IdontgivaFuck
 More like Julus Fuckt
 WHAT IS THIS IVE NEVER SEEN THE LAST TWO STORIES OH MY GO D
 247 WHT IS THE GOD DAMN POINTAM SO UPSET DO YOU WANT FUICKING
 CHINA USTENING TO YOUR CONCERT BECAUSEGUESS WHAT THAT IS
 WHAT YOURE GOING TO GE
 FUCK WAS THAT
 IT WAS THE TROMBONISTSTHEYRE COMING THERE IS NO ESCAPE
 Pyrozod's tags for this were too hlanious not to share
 You need to check out FUNSubstance.com
XD XD XD XD

XD XD XD XD

Fake, Funny, and Love: HOW ABOUT 3. Pavane Gently 76 soft mallets IJUST DON'T PLAY sushinfood vivelafat prokopetz elsajeni musicalmelody Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn't soft enough for him So getting frustrated, I told my buddy "Dont play this time. Just fake it Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect To my readers p means quiet, pp means really quiet Ive never seen pppp before haha On the contrast, f means loud, and fff probably means so loud you go unconscious. I had fff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair Me and my trombone buddies had fifff and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair The lengths we go for music Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other's hands all shhh dont call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, "All right, let's run through t up to section A. And here we are, cheerfully playing along sounding reasonably competent-but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players They don't come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is [stifled gigglingl [reeeeeeally deep breath] COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE] The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn't actually been cued to stop. The band director doesnt even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: "THERE WERE FOUR FS. FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why wouid you put it in a tuba part This is the best band post Everyone else go home This is so funny!
Fake, Funny, and Love: HOW ABOUT
 3. Pavane
 Gently 76
 soft mallets
 IJUST DON'T PLAY
 sushinfood
 vivelafat
 prokopetz
 elsajeni
 musicalmelody
 Fun Story: My director
 kept telling me and my
 tenor sax buddy to play
 softer. No matter what
 we did, it wasn't soft
 enough for him So
 getting frustrated, I told
 my buddy "Dont play
 this time. Just fake it
 Our Band Director then
 informed us we
 sounded perfect
 To my readers p means
 quiet, pp means really
 quiet Ive never seen
 pppp before haha
 On the contrast, f means
 loud, and fff probably
 means so loud you go
 unconscious.
 I had fff in a piece once and my
 conductor told me to play as
 loudly as physically possible
 without falling off my chair
 Me and my trombone buddies had
 fifff and he sat next to me and
 played so hard that he fell out of his
 chair
 The lengths we go for music
 Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and
 the amount of air you have to move and
 the stiffness of the reed means it only
 has two settings and that is loud and
 louder, with an optional LOUDEST that
 includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE
 CROAKING NOISE which is the bass
 equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet
 shriek
 One day, when I was in concert band in high
 school, we got a new piece handed out for the
 first time, and there was a strange little
 commotion back in the tuba section
 whispering, and pointing at something in the
 music, and swatting at each other's hands all
 shhh dont call attention to it. And although
 they did attract the attention of basically
 everyone else in the band, they managed to
 avoid being noticed by the band director, who
 gave us a few minutes to look over our parts
 and then said, "All right, let's run through t up
 to section A.
 And here we are, cheerfully playing along
 sounding reasonably competent-but
 everyone, when they have the attention to
 spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players
 They don't come in for the first eight
 measures or so, and then when they do
 come in, what we see is
 [stifled gigglingl
 [reeeeeeally deep breath]
 COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
 The entire band stops dead, in the
 cacophonous kind of way that a band stops
 when it hasn't actually been cued to stop. The
 band director doesnt even say anything, just
 looks straight back at the tubas and makes a
 helpless sort of why gesture
 In unison, the tuba players defend
 themselves: "THERE WERE FOUR FS.
 FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking
 for any instrument, but for the love of all that
 is holy why wouid you put it in a tuba part
 This is the best band post
 Everyone else go home
This is so funny!

This is so funny!