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Af, Ass, and Austin Powers: Needless to say, I didn't move for a while See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman ๐Ÿ˜...No offense but u don't need this type of negativity in yo life bruh ๐Ÿ˜‚. (2) "OMG daddy I need you ๐Ÿ˜." She a keeper. That's a good woman. (3) "K. How many other girls got this? Curious ๐Ÿค”." <- wife. This is your wife, u found her bruh ๐Ÿ˜‚. U feel me? She protecc. Like the flood waters coming, she gon rip the refrigerator door off the fridge and use it as a raft. She gon paddle your babies to safety. U gon call her from a business trip to NY like "baby u ok I seen the news" and she gon be like "NO I'M NOT OK MF I GOT *YOUR* LOOKIN ASS KIDS TRYINA PADDLE TO SAFETY BC U AIN'T HERE AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEIR FUCKING FACE I GET TIGHT BC I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET U GET ME PREGNANT AND THEN LEAVE ME IN A FLOOD WE'LL DISCUSS LATER BYE." This type of woman will punch u in the face when u wake up for no reason. U sipping a Intelligentsia Black Cat Espresso happy go lucky af ready to take on the day and she walk right up to u with her hair fucked up and punch u exactly in the nose to where yo septum deviate. Yo septum was good AF now it's crooked like Austin Powers teeth lol. And u like "baby??" And she like "YOU CHEATED ON ME IN MY DREAM. WITH A BLOND BITCH. AS I SUSPECTED. MOTHER ๐Ÿ‘ FUCKER ๐Ÿ‘. BEEN TOLD U. U LIKE BLONDS SO MUCH? GO FIND A BLOND, THEY GROW ON TREES. DON'T WASTE MY MF TIME. GET THE FUCK TO WORK WE TALK LATER." (Crazy women always wanna give u the business and then warn u that another reaming is coming lol.) And u just like "baby I don't have a type, YOU my type" and she just like "YOUR ๐Ÿ‘ TYPE ๐Ÿ‘ IS ๐Ÿ‘ BLOND ๐Ÿ‘ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ DIRTY ๐Ÿ‘ DICK ๐Ÿ‘ NIGHTMARE ๐Ÿ‘ CHEATER ๐Ÿ‘ I ๐Ÿ‘ SAID ๐Ÿ‘ WE ๐Ÿ‘ TALK ๐Ÿ‘ LATER." There u have it. Getchu a girl who wild about u bro. If she lukewarm u wasting your time. Get a girl who will kill for u then fuck around KILL u - it's the stabby ones that always got the most firey Punani ya get me! Bless up ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ (๐Ÿ“ธ: Reddit u-lucidf0x)
Af, Ass, and Austin Powers: Needless to say, I didn't move for a while
See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman ๐Ÿ˜...No offense but u don't need this type of negativity in yo life bruh ๐Ÿ˜‚. (2) "OMG daddy I need you ๐Ÿ˜." She a keeper. That's a good woman. (3) "K. How many other girls got this? Curious ๐Ÿค”." <- wife. This is your wife, u found her bruh ๐Ÿ˜‚. U feel me? She protecc. Like the flood waters coming, she gon rip the refrigerator door off the fridge and use it as a raft. She gon paddle your babies to safety. U gon call her from a business trip to NY like "baby u ok I seen the news" and she gon be like "NO I'M NOT OK MF I GOT *YOUR* LOOKIN ASS KIDS TRYINA PADDLE TO SAFETY BC U AIN'T HERE AND EVERY TIME I LOOK AT THEIR FUCKING FACE I GET TIGHT BC I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET U GET ME PREGNANT AND THEN LEAVE ME IN A FLOOD WE'LL DISCUSS LATER BYE." This type of woman will punch u in the face when u wake up for no reason. U sipping a Intelligentsia Black Cat Espresso happy go lucky af ready to take on the day and she walk right up to u with her hair fucked up and punch u exactly in the nose to where yo septum deviate. Yo septum was good AF now it's crooked like Austin Powers teeth lol. And u like "baby??" And she like "YOU CHEATED ON ME IN MY DREAM. WITH A BLOND BITCH. AS I SUSPECTED. MOTHER ๐Ÿ‘ FUCKER ๐Ÿ‘. BEEN TOLD U. U LIKE BLONDS SO MUCH? GO FIND A BLOND, THEY GROW ON TREES. DON'T WASTE MY MF TIME. GET THE FUCK TO WORK WE TALK LATER." (Crazy women always wanna give u the business and then warn u that another reaming is coming lol.) And u just like "baby I don't have a type, YOU my type" and she just like "YOUR ๐Ÿ‘ TYPE ๐Ÿ‘ IS ๐Ÿ‘ BLOND ๐Ÿ‘ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ DIRTY ๐Ÿ‘ DICK ๐Ÿ‘ NIGHTMARE ๐Ÿ‘ CHEATER ๐Ÿ‘ I ๐Ÿ‘ SAID ๐Ÿ‘ WE ๐Ÿ‘ TALK ๐Ÿ‘ LATER." There u have it. Getchu a girl who wild about u bro. If she lukewarm u wasting your time. Get a girl who will kill for u then fuck around KILL u - it's the stabby ones that always got the most firey Punani ya get me! Bless up ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ (๐Ÿ“ธ: Reddit u-lucidf0x)

See bruh if u send a sexy pic of yourself to a girl it's three possible responses: (1) "cute". Fire this woman ๐Ÿ˜...No offense but u don't ne...

Books, Cum, and Hungry: Anonymous | 741797107 6 min. ago .. 30 year old NEET wake up at 2pm had accident in sleep which I rolled around in grab cum-towel off nightstand and do my best to wipe the mess from my folds of fat tummy gurgles loudly, so hungry plop out of bed, navigate through shit jugs and piss bottles in my room 102.0 kB JPG waddle downstairs to check GBP board wait a minute to catch my breath before l look just enough Good Boy Points for some tendies and sauce! legs buckle under own weight roll myself into the living room where mummy is watching her favorite soap opera "mummy mummy I have enough Good Boy Points for some tendies!" >she turns to me with the most disqusting look on her face while I lay flat on the ground stuggling to get up "s-sure honey, le-let me just get some tendies for you'" she struggles to go to the kitchen without vomitting from the smell and sight of my obese, putrid, feces and semen covered she pulls the tendies out of the freezer after letting the oven heat up as she begins to cry into the sink I roll over and pull myself up to my high chair that starts to creak as I sit down have my crayons and Ninja Turtles coloring book to occupy me while I wait the tendies are finally done and she puts them on my plate she can't hold back the vomit as I open my mouth to eat some tendies and vomits all over my plate I can't let these tendies go to waste, so l eat them along with the vomit "yummy wummy tendies in my tummy thanks mummy do my best to muster a smile but the rows of decaying teeth only disgust mummy further high-chair finally breaks from my heft causes me to have another accident mum runs away to her room, sobbing uncontrollably, so ashamed of her baby boy I just sit there on floor, in my own filth, thinking about what a disappointment I am mfw Anon is a dissapointment
Books, Cum, and Hungry: Anonymous | 741797107
 6 min. ago ..
 30 year old NEET
 wake up at 2pm
 had accident in sleep which I rolled
 around in
 grab cum-towel off nightstand and do my
 best to wipe the mess from my folds of fat
 tummy gurgles loudly, so hungry
 plop out of bed, navigate through shit jugs
 and piss bottles in my room
 102.0 kB JPG
 waddle downstairs to check GBP board
 wait a minute to catch my breath before l
 look
 just enough Good Boy Points for some
 tendies and sauce!
 legs buckle under own weight
 roll myself into the living room where
 mummy is watching her favorite soap
 opera
 "mummy mummy I have enough Good
 Boy Points for some tendies!"
 >she turns to me with the most disqusting
 look on her face while I lay flat on the
 ground stuggling to get up
 "s-sure honey, le-let me just get some
 tendies for you'"
 she struggles to go to the kitchen without
 vomitting from the smell and sight of my
 obese, putrid, feces and semen covered
 she pulls the tendies out of the freezer
 after letting the oven heat up as she begins
 to cry into the sink

 I roll over and pull myself up to my high
 chair that starts to creak as I sit down
 have my crayons and Ninja Turtles
 coloring book to occupy me while I wait
 the tendies are finally done and she puts
 them on my plate
 she can't hold back the vomit as I open my
 mouth to eat some tendies and vomits all
 over my plate
 I can't let these tendies go to waste, so l
 eat them along with the vomit
 "yummy wummy tendies in my tummy
 thanks mummy
 do my best to muster a smile but the rows
 of decaying teeth only disgust mummy
 further
 high-chair finally breaks from my heft
 causes me to have another accident
 mum runs away to her room, sobbing
 uncontrollably, so ashamed of her baby boy
 I just sit there on floor, in my own filth,
 thinking about what a disappointment I am
 mfw
Anon is a dissapointment

Anon is a dissapointment

Af, Alive, and Ass: True Love, 13 Years Later. @DrSmashlove People visit Chicago from smaller towns and be like "omg people in Chicago drive crazy", "wow, y'all honk so much, why you always honking", "sheesh Chicago drivers are nuts they always speeding why they so reckless." Ok. Nah. Hell nah. Y'all ain't seen crazy TILL U BEEN TO MF MONTANA ๐Ÿ˜‚. See in Chicago ALL highways got a 55 miles per hour speed limit. So somebody go 80 and they look crazy AF. In Montana tho? The SPEED LIMIT IS 80 ๐Ÿ˜ซ. Ok...so what if u go 80? That's the speed limit, u good - right? Bruh. The person behind u won't honk. They won't press u. They will simply drive like they attached to your bumper for a few miles. Then they will pass u by swerving left into ONCOMING TRAFFIC ON A HIGHWAY THAT RUNS ALONG A CLIFF OF A MOUNTAIN AND PASS U. U look over and u think u finna see a crazy ass redneck with a bad mullet, meth teeth, and death wish. Nah. U see a grandma wearing a pink tank top and she got a nice tan sipping a Starbucks coffee grinning at u as she pass u going NINETY FUCKING FIVE. And she got a semi truck coming right at her and she smiling at him and he smiling back at her and then he smiling at YOU like "IF HE DIES HE DIES" *Russian dude from Rocky voice. AF*. What's crazy is u could have to be somewhere 200 miles away and as long as U don't get eaten alive by a rattlesnake at a rest stop ... ๐Ÿค— ... that's two hours of driving flat. In Chicago that's three hours easy. U feel me? I'm not mad at this speedracing-ass, colossal, somewhat inconsequential oversized land mass of a state. So to conclude: Montana girls got fat asses and drive they white Denali SUVs like they Italian race car drivers WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE BLESS UP ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
Af, Alive, and Ass: True Love, 13 Years Later.
 @DrSmashlove
People visit Chicago from smaller towns and be like "omg people in Chicago drive crazy", "wow, y'all honk so much, why you always honking", "sheesh Chicago drivers are nuts they always speeding why they so reckless." Ok. Nah. Hell nah. Y'all ain't seen crazy TILL U BEEN TO MF MONTANA ๐Ÿ˜‚. See in Chicago ALL highways got a 55 miles per hour speed limit. So somebody go 80 and they look crazy AF. In Montana tho? The SPEED LIMIT IS 80 ๐Ÿ˜ซ. Ok...so what if u go 80? That's the speed limit, u good - right? Bruh. The person behind u won't honk. They won't press u. They will simply drive like they attached to your bumper for a few miles. Then they will pass u by swerving left into ONCOMING TRAFFIC ON A HIGHWAY THAT RUNS ALONG A CLIFF OF A MOUNTAIN AND PASS U. U look over and u think u finna see a crazy ass redneck with a bad mullet, meth teeth, and death wish. Nah. U see a grandma wearing a pink tank top and she got a nice tan sipping a Starbucks coffee grinning at u as she pass u going NINETY FUCKING FIVE. And she got a semi truck coming right at her and she smiling at him and he smiling back at her and then he smiling at YOU like "IF HE DIES HE DIES" *Russian dude from Rocky voice. AF*. What's crazy is u could have to be somewhere 200 miles away and as long as U don't get eaten alive by a rattlesnake at a rest stop ... ๐Ÿค— ... that's two hours of driving flat. In Chicago that's three hours easy. U feel me? I'm not mad at this speedracing-ass, colossal, somewhat inconsequential oversized land mass of a state. So to conclude: Montana girls got fat asses and drive they white Denali SUVs like they Italian race car drivers WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE BLESS UP ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

People visit Chicago from smaller towns and be like "omg people in Chicago drive crazy", "wow, y'all honk so much, why you always honking", ...