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Children, Comfortable, and Parents: AHSIEH Should Climate Change Be Taught In School? Schools should teach about Schools should teach that Schools should not teach Don't know climate change and its impacts on our environment, economy and society anything about climate change climate change exists, but not the potential impacts 100% 6% 7% 9% 13% 17% 8% 6% 10% 10% 80% 12% 16% 17% 12% 60% 17% 81% 40% 74% 68% 66% 49% 20% 0% Overall Teachers Parents Democrats Republicans Source: NPR/lpsos polls of 1,007 U.S. adults conducted March 21-22 and 505 teachers conducted March 21-29. The credibility interval for the overall sample is 3.5 percentage points; parents, 7.3 percentage points; and teachers, 5.0 percentage points. Totals may not add up to 100 percent because of rounding. npr Credit: Alyson Hurt/NPR Teachers Who Cover Climate Change Differ From Those Who Don't Teach climate change All teachers Don't teach climate change Overall: 71% I feel comfortable answering students' questions about climate change 91% 56% Overall: 52% There should be state laws in place that require teaching climate change 38% 70% Thave the resources I need to answer students' questions about climate change Overall: 51% 77% 32% Overall: 41% My students have brought up climate change in the classroom this year 14% 78% My school or school district encourages us to discuss climate change in the Overall: 37% classroom 64% 18% Overall: 29% I worry about parent complaints when it comes to teaching climate change 29% 30% Overall: 21% I would be personally uncomfortable if I had to teach about climate change 15% 27% 0% 25% 50% 75% 100% Source: NPR/Ipsos polls of 505 teachers conducted March 21-29. The credibility interval for the overall sample is 5 percentage points. npr Credit: Alyson Hurt/NPR npr: More than 80% of parents in the U.S. support the teaching of climate change. And that support crosses political divides, according to the results of an exclusive new NPR/Ipsos poll: Whether they have children or not, two-thirds of Republicans and 9 in 10 Democrats agree that the subject needs to be taught in school. A separate poll of teachers found that they are even more supportive, in theory — 86% agree that climate change should be taught. These polls are among the first to gauge public and teacher opinion on how climate change should be taught to the generation that in the coming years will face its intensifying consequences: children. And yet, as millions of students around the globe participate in Earth Day events on Monday, our poll also found a disconnect. Although most states have classroom standards that at least mention human-caused climate change, most teachers aren’t actually talking about climate change in their classrooms. And fewer than half of parents have discussed the issue with their children. Most Teachers Don’t Teach Climate Change; 4 In 5 Parents Wish They Did Illustration: Angela Hsieh/NPRCharts: Alyson Hurt/NPR
Children, Comfortable, and Parents: AHSIEH

 Should Climate Change Be Taught In School?
 Schools should teach about
 Schools should teach that
 Schools should not teach
 Don't know
 climate change and its impacts
 on our environment, economy
 and society
 anything about climate change
 climate change exists, but not
 the potential impacts
 100%
 6%
 7%
 9%
 13%
 17%
 8%
 6%
 10%
 10%
 80%
 12%
 16%
 17%
 12%
 60%
 17%
 81%
 40%
 74%
 68%
 66%
 49%
 20%
 0%
 Overall
 Teachers
 Parents
 Democrats
 Republicans
 Source: NPR/lpsos polls of 1,007 U.S. adults conducted March 21-22 and 505 teachers conducted March 21-29. The credibility interval for the overall
 sample is 3.5 percentage points; parents, 7.3 percentage points; and teachers, 5.0 percentage points. Totals may not add up to 100 percent because
 of rounding.
 npr
 Credit: Alyson Hurt/NPR

 Teachers Who Cover Climate Change Differ From Those Who Don't
 Teach climate change
 All teachers
 Don't teach climate change
 Overall: 71%
 I feel comfortable answering students'
 questions about climate change
 91%
 56%
 Overall: 52%
 There should be state laws in place that
 require teaching climate change
 38%
 70%
 Thave the resources I need to answer
 students' questions about
 climate change
 Overall: 51%
 77%
 32%
 Overall: 41%
 My students have brought up climate
 change in the classroom this year
 14%
 78%
 My school or school district encourages
 us to discuss climate change in the
 Overall: 37%
 classroom
 64%
 18%
 Overall: 29%
 I worry about parent complaints when it
 comes to teaching climate change
 29% 30%
 Overall: 21%
 I would be personally uncomfortable if I
 had to teach about climate change
 15%
 27%
 0%
 25%
 50%
 75%
 100%
 Source: NPR/Ipsos polls of 505 teachers conducted March 21-29. The credibility interval for the overall sample is 5 percentage points.
 npr
 Credit: Alyson Hurt/NPR
npr:
More than 80% of parents in the U.S. support the teaching of climate change. And that support crosses political divides, according to the results of an exclusive new NPR/Ipsos poll: Whether they have children or not, two-thirds of Republicans and 9 in 10 Democrats agree that the subject needs to be taught in school.
A separate poll of teachers found that they are even more supportive, in theory — 86% agree that climate change should be taught.
These polls are among the first to gauge public and teacher opinion on how climate change should be taught to the generation that in the coming years will face its intensifying consequences: children.
And yet, as millions of students around the globe participate in Earth Day events on Monday, our poll also found a disconnect. Although most states have classroom standards that at least mention human-caused climate change, most teachers aren’t actually talking about climate change in their classrooms. And fewer than half of parents have discussed the issue with their children.
Most Teachers Don’t Teach Climate Change; 4 In 5 Parents Wish They Did
Illustration: Angela Hsieh/NPRCharts: Alyson Hurt/NPR

npr: More than 80% of parents in the U.S. support the teaching of climate change. And that support crosses political divides, according to t...

Another One, Bad, and Barbie: er er KINDER SURPRISE 2OG KINGER SURPRISE T-1 1.17 KS GIRLS 20G KINDER SURPRISE GIRL 1.17 bizarre-transmission: findingfeather: wetwareproblem: thoughts-of-an-x-factor: ohgressfuriosa: castiel-knight-of-hell: jen-kollic: thejollity: jen-kollic: hobopoppins: manaphy: wow I didn’t know fuckin chocolate eggs were gendered OKAY LET ME TELL YOU A STORY ABOUT THE FUCKING PINK EGGS. I work at a concession stand in an ice rink. We sell a bunch of chocolate bars and snacks and shit including Kinder Surprise eggs. So one day this woman comes up to the counter with her two little kids, a girl who’s probably about 6 or 7 and a little boy, maybe 3 or 4. The mom asks what they want, the little girl points at the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if she wanted the white or the pink egg. She said pink. The little boy pointed to the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if he wanted the white or the pink egg. He said pink. HOLY SHIT IT WAS LIKE I OPENED THE GATES OF HELL. The mom absolutely FLIPPED and was like “YOU ARE NOT GETTING THE PINK EGG IT’S ONLY FOR GIRLS. YOU CAN GET THE WHITE ONE OR NOTHING AT ALL”. The little boy looked at his mom and said “But I want the same as ______ (whatever the sister’s name was)”. The mom completely ignored him and turned to me and gave me a death glare. “He can have the white egg.” I had to give a little boy a white egg when he wanted the pink so that he could be the same as his big sister and he started crying. The mom just reiterated that the pink egg was for girls and told him that boys don’t cry. And this is why we shouldn’t gender fucking chocolate eggs. This is actually a relatively new thing, originally Kinder Eggs were all white like the ones on the left. I don’t know at what point they decided to make ‘girl’s’ Kinder Eggs, but I do not like it. Holy shit do not even get me started on how moms constantly police their sons’ masculinity. I’ve seen mothers do it WAY more often than fathers. I used to work at a bakery that specialized in creating custom cakes. We had this feature where we could print out any image off the computer and put it on a cake (with rice paper). One day this lady comes in and asks for an image we had of the baby Sesame Street characters. They’re all together with cake and confetti, and she asks, “Oh, well since it’s a boy, can you please change all of the little pink confettis into blue confetti? I mean, he’s a boy, you know.” Confetti. The fucking confetti. It barely covered 5% of the image. Another instance was when a lady asked me for an image of four superheroes to put on her son’s cake because her son was turning four. She admitted to not knowing any superheroes, so I offered the most obvious choice—The Fantastic Four. I pulled up a picture of them and she goes, “Oh no no, we can’t have that. Let’s do another one.” Confused, I pulled up a Justice League one with Batman, Superman, The Flash, and Wonder Woman. Again, she said no. I asked her if she needed anything specific (she didn’t know superheroes, why was she so picky?), and she just said, “Oh, it’s just that he’s a boy, you know? We can’t have a girl superhero on his cake.” I nearly lost my shit. I did temporarily lose my customer service face and ask why, women have been superheroes all the time, Wonder Woman is iconic, etc etc and she was like, “It’s just that my son has been playing with Barbie dolls lately and I really don’t want him to end up… well, you know.” This shit has got to stop. When you teach boys that certain things are only for girls, you’re limiting them and you’re teaching them that girls or “girly things” are bad. If you want gender equality as an adult, you better make DAMN sure that you’re teaching the same thing to your kids. So this woman did not want her son to turn out ‘you know’ and her plan for that was to get him a cake with spandex-clad manly men AND ONLY MEN on it? I don’t think she thought that one through too well… in sociology class we were talking about gender being assigned to objects and one of the male students started saying how forward thinking he is because he buys his daughter sports equipment and “boy toys”. I asked if he’d do the same if he had a son and he said “Of course I’d buy my son sports equipment”. I clarified “No, would you buy him dolls and other toys that are thought of as being for girls”. He turned around and didn’t answer. Parents will pat themselves on the back for letting their little girls play baseball but a little boy with a Barbie is still considered an affront to society Fuck everything. My father was one of these parents (along with several other harmful issues!), and even though I know, for an absolute fact, that his world views and ways are entirely wrong, this shit he tried to ingrain into me still effects me to this day.Parents, don’t ruin your fucking kids by treating them like this. I wonder how much of the “mothers police masculinity more” phenomenon comes back to “when a man fails at masculinity, we call him a mama’s boy and blame her for it.” A lot of it. It doesn’t really excuse it, and as someone who did a decade and a half of childcare I can tell you that for every woman who does as described above there’s one sneaking the Dora the Explorer fruit snacks because those are the ones her son loves but his father will flip his shit. Or being crushed that since he went to daycare he suddenly won’t do “girl stuff” bc the other boys will make fun of him. It’s really sad either way. But when it does manifest that way a huge amount is “I’m not raising a mama’s boy I’m raising a MAN!” And it’s gross. My nephew is 4 and we’ve NEVER gendered things with him, whenever he’s allowed a treat or a toy, we just ask him which one he wants and that’s it, sometimes he picks out cars and superhero toys, other times he wants dolls and pretty pink things, I let him choose his prize at a carnival last summer and he excitedly picked a big hot pink inflatable baseball bat that said “princess” on it, the looks we got from some people were astounding. And even if he does turn out to be “you know”, then good for him, he’ll be wholeheartedly loved and supported.
Another One, Bad, and Barbie: er
 er
 KINDER SURPRISE
 2OG KINGER SURPRISE T-1
 1.17
 KS GIRLS
 20G KINDER SURPRISE GIRL
 1.17
bizarre-transmission:

findingfeather:
wetwareproblem:


thoughts-of-an-x-factor:


ohgressfuriosa:

castiel-knight-of-hell:

jen-kollic:

thejollity:

jen-kollic:

hobopoppins:

manaphy:
wow I didn’t know fuckin chocolate eggs were gendered
OKAY LET ME TELL YOU A STORY ABOUT THE FUCKING PINK EGGS.
I work at a concession stand in an ice rink. We sell a bunch of chocolate bars and snacks and shit including Kinder Surprise eggs.
So one day this woman comes up to the counter with her two little kids, a girl who’s probably about 6 or 7 and a little boy, maybe 3 or 4. The mom asks what they want, the little girl points at the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if she wanted the white or the pink egg. She said pink. The little boy pointed to the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if he wanted the white or the pink egg. He said pink. HOLY SHIT IT WAS LIKE I OPENED THE GATES OF HELL. The mom absolutely FLIPPED and was like “YOU ARE NOT GETTING THE PINK EGG IT’S ONLY FOR GIRLS. YOU CAN GET THE WHITE ONE OR NOTHING AT ALL”. The little boy looked at his mom and said “But I want the same as ______ (whatever the sister’s name was)”. The mom completely ignored him and turned to me and gave me a death glare. “He can have the white egg.”
I had to give a little boy a white egg when he wanted the pink so that he could be the same as his big sister and he started crying. The mom just reiterated that the pink egg was for girls and told him that boys don’t cry.
And this is why we shouldn’t gender fucking chocolate eggs.

This is actually a relatively new thing, originally Kinder Eggs were all white like the ones on the left. I don’t know at what point they decided to make ‘girl’s’ Kinder Eggs, but I do not like it.

Holy shit do not even get me started on how moms constantly police their sons’ masculinity. I’ve seen mothers do it WAY more often than fathers.
I used to work at a bakery that specialized in creating custom cakes. We had this feature where we could print out any image off the computer and put it on a cake (with rice paper). One day this lady comes in and asks for an image we had of the baby Sesame Street characters. They’re all together with cake and confetti, and she asks, “Oh, well since it’s a boy, can you please change all of the little pink confettis into blue confetti? I mean, he’s a boy, you know.”
Confetti.
The fucking confetti.
It barely covered 5% of the image.
Another instance was when a lady asked me for an image of four superheroes to put on her son’s cake because her son was turning four. She admitted to not knowing any superheroes, so I offered the most obvious choice—The Fantastic Four. I pulled up a picture of them and she goes, “Oh no no, we can’t have that. Let’s do another one.” Confused, I pulled up a Justice League one with Batman, Superman, The Flash, and Wonder Woman. Again, she said no. I asked her if she needed anything specific (she didn’t know superheroes, why was she so picky?), and she just said, “Oh, it’s just that he’s a boy, you know? We can’t have a girl superhero on his cake.”
I nearly lost my shit. I did temporarily lose my customer service face and ask why, women have been superheroes all the time, Wonder Woman is iconic, etc etc and she was like, “It’s just that my son has been playing with Barbie dolls lately and I really don’t want him to end up… well, you know.”
This shit has got to stop. When you teach boys that certain things are only for girls, you’re limiting them and you’re teaching them that girls or “girly things” are bad. If you want gender equality as an adult, you better make DAMN sure that you’re teaching the same thing to your kids.

So this woman did not want her son to turn out ‘you know’ and her plan for that was to get him a cake with spandex-clad manly men AND ONLY MEN on it? I don’t think she thought that one through too well…

in sociology class we were talking about gender being assigned to objects and one of the male students started saying how forward thinking he is because he buys his daughter sports equipment and “boy toys”. I asked if he’d do the same if he had a son and he said “Of course I’d buy my son sports equipment”. I clarified “No, would you buy him dolls and other toys that are thought of as being for girls”. He turned around and didn’t answer.
Parents will pat themselves on the back for letting their little girls play baseball but a little boy with a Barbie is still considered an affront to society


Fuck everything.

My father was one of these parents (along with several other harmful issues!), and even though I know, for an absolute fact, that his world views and ways are entirely wrong, this shit he tried to ingrain into me still effects me to this day.Parents, don’t ruin your fucking kids by treating them like this.


I wonder how much of the “mothers police masculinity more” phenomenon comes back to “when a man fails at masculinity, we call him a mama’s boy and blame her for it.”


A lot of it. It doesn’t really excuse it, and as someone who did a decade and a half of childcare I can tell you that for every woman who does as described above there’s one sneaking the Dora the Explorer fruit snacks because those are the ones her son loves but his father will flip his shit. 
Or being crushed that since he went to daycare he suddenly won’t do “girl stuff” bc the other boys will make fun of him. 
It’s really sad either way. 
But when it does manifest that way a huge amount is “I’m not raising a mama’s boy I’m raising a MAN!” And it’s gross. 


My nephew is 4 and we’ve NEVER gendered things with him, whenever he’s allowed a treat or a toy, we just ask him which one he wants and that’s it, sometimes he picks out cars and superhero toys, other times he wants dolls and pretty pink things, I let him choose his prize at a carnival last summer and he excitedly picked a big hot pink inflatable baseball bat that said “princess” on it, the looks we got from some people were astounding. And even if he does turn out to be “you know”, then good for him, he’ll be wholeheartedly loved and supported.

bizarre-transmission: findingfeather: wetwareproblem: thoughts-of-an-x-factor: ohgressfuriosa: castiel-knight-of-hell: jen-kollic: t...

Ass, Children, and Grandma: Thread Zachary Fox and 3 others liked A$MR Rocky @ChristianMingel Trained psychologists: "Hitting your kids can cause them to be violent adults" Twitter genius: "l was hit and I never turned out violent. That's why l can't wait to hit my own kids when l get them" 1/4/18, 2:44 PM 19.2K Retweets 55.4K Likes imfemalewarrior: thebaconsandwichofregret: asexual-not-asexual-detective: Am I the only one who thinks that hitting a kid and abuse are different things? Like, if I ever had a kid, I wouldn’t spank their ass raw or something like that. But a bop on the mouth or the ear pull or a smack upside the head? Yea. Those are behavior modifiers. Except they’re not. The studies done by the trained psychologists in this joke show that little kids don’t associate being hit with the thing they’ve done wrong. Very small children only understand consequences that are directly caused by the thing they did. Steal a biscuit, biscuit tastes good. Then for no reason mummy hit me. Very different to stole a biscuit, now no biscuit after dinner because I stole a biscuit. And they also show that when a child is old enough to understand why they are being hit that non-physical punishment is equally as effective and less mentally harmful in the long run. Do you know who benefits the most from hitting as a punishment? The parent. It gives a satisfaction rush. Parents do it because it makes them feel good. Basically kids have two stages: too young to understand why they are being hit so physical punishment is useless for anything other than teaching a child that bigger stronger people can hit you whenever they like (Which sounds like the same lesson you would learn from abuse) And the second stage is old enough to be reasoned with so many punishment options are available and you chose physical violence because it makes *you* feel better, which is an abusive action. The only time a person should ever use violence against another human being, of any age, is to stop that person from being violent themselves. We need to listen to the professionals telling us what is actively harmful to our children and what is actually effective in helping them learn how to grow up and navigate each new stage of their development.  Children are people and you need to Respect them, part of that is learning how to help them and what harms them and not doing the thing that harms them.  -FemaleWarrior, She/They  i think it’s  a societal perversion to acknowledge that hitting your mother, your friend, your grandma if they did something “wrong” is not okay, yet for some strange reason this same correct logic is never used on children the irony is that children are objectively less culpable for their actions than adults yet we use the most violent methods available to “correct” their actions. I find this a disgusting paradox. 
Ass, Children, and Grandma: Thread
 Zachary Fox and 3 others liked
 A$MR Rocky
 @ChristianMingel
 Trained psychologists: "Hitting your kids
 can cause them to be violent adults"
 Twitter genius: "l was hit and I never
 turned out violent. That's why l can't
 wait to hit my own kids when l get them"
 1/4/18, 2:44 PM
 19.2K Retweets 55.4K Likes
imfemalewarrior:

thebaconsandwichofregret:

asexual-not-asexual-detective:

Am I the only one who thinks that hitting a kid and abuse are different things? Like, if I ever had a kid, I wouldn’t spank their ass raw or something like that. But a bop on the mouth or the ear pull or a smack upside the head? Yea. Those are behavior modifiers. 

Except they’re not. 
The studies done by the trained psychologists in this joke show that little kids don’t associate being hit with the thing they’ve done wrong. Very small children only understand consequences that are directly caused by the thing they did. Steal a biscuit, biscuit tastes good. Then for no reason mummy hit me. Very different to stole a biscuit, now no biscuit after dinner because I stole a biscuit.
And they also show that when a child is old enough to understand why they are being hit that non-physical punishment is equally as effective and less mentally harmful in the long run. 
Do you know who benefits the most from hitting as a punishment? The parent. It gives a satisfaction rush. Parents do it because it makes them feel good. 
Basically kids have two stages: too young to understand why they are being hit so physical punishment is useless for anything other than teaching a child that bigger stronger people can hit you whenever they like (Which sounds like the same lesson you would learn from abuse)
And the second stage is old enough to be reasoned with so many punishment options are available and you chose physical violence because it makes *you* feel better, which is an abusive action. 
The only time a person should ever use violence against another human being, of any age, is to stop that person from being violent themselves. 

We need to listen to the professionals telling us what is actively harmful to our children and what is actually effective in helping them learn how to grow up and navigate each new stage of their development. 
Children are people and you need to Respect them, part of that is learning how to help them and what harms them and not doing the thing that harms them. 
-FemaleWarrior, She/They 

i think it’s  a societal perversion to acknowledge that hitting your mother, your friend, your grandma if they did something “wrong” is not okay, yet for some strange reason this same correct logic is never used on children the irony is that children are objectively less culpable for their actions than adults yet we use the most violent methods available to “correct” their actions. I find this a disgusting paradox. 

imfemalewarrior: thebaconsandwichofregret: asexual-not-asexual-detective: Am I the only one who thinks that hitting a kid and abuse are d...

Children, Crying, and Doe: The Root @TheRoot IEROOT Following Betsy DeVos to Schools: Call ICE on Undocumented Children trib.al/pzH2ze6 5:40 PM - 24 May 2018 1,792 Retweets 1,558 Likes sheriff lonely heart @Flamin_Alpaca Follow This is actually illegal. She knows so little about public school that she doesn't realize undocumented children were afforded the right to a free public education (Plyler v. Doe, 1982). Future educators are taught this in our prep programs. Oh wait, Betsy was never a teacher. The Root@TheRoot Betsy DeVos to Schools: Call ICE on Undocumented Children trib.al /pzH2ze6 8:02 AM-26 May 2018 itsatru: welcometonegrotown: last year when i was teaching 11th grade one of my fav students came in crying so i put the class on a filler activity and we just talked. they were doing ICE raids in the city and she was worried her parents wouldnt be there when she got home. then she was worried that ICE may come to the school and take her. we looked the laws up together and printed it out so she could carry the papers with her.  it is illegal for ICE to raid a school and take children. ILLEGAL. i told my student (and eventually the class in like a blanket statement because i had quite a few undocumented students) that if anyone did come i would put my body between ICE and my students and really struggle. honestly my heart broke so much that day - take care of undocumented people in your life because they deserve so much better than this ffs. this woman is so very evil and has a black heart and i hope she rots in prison
Children, Crying, and Doe: The Root
 @TheRoot
 IEROOT
 Following
 Betsy DeVos to Schools: Call ICE on
 Undocumented Children trib.al/pzH2ze6
 5:40 PM - 24 May 2018
 1,792 Retweets 1,558 Likes

 sheriff lonely heart
 @Flamin_Alpaca
 Follow
 This is actually illegal. She knows so little
 about public school that she doesn't realize
 undocumented children were afforded the
 right to a free public education (Plyler v. Doe,
 1982). Future educators are taught this in our
 prep programs. Oh wait, Betsy was never a
 teacher.
 The Root@TheRoot
 Betsy DeVos to Schools: Call ICE on Undocumented Children trib.al
 /pzH2ze6
 8:02 AM-26 May 2018
itsatru:
welcometonegrotown:

last year when i was teaching 11th grade one of my fav students came in crying so i put the class on a filler activity and we just talked. they were doing ICE raids in the city and she was worried her parents wouldnt be there when she got home. then she was worried that ICE may come to the school and take her. we looked the laws up together and printed it out so she could carry the papers with her. 
it is illegal for ICE to raid a school and take children. ILLEGAL. i told my student (and eventually the class in like a blanket statement because i had quite a few undocumented students) that if anyone did come i would put my body between ICE and my students and really struggle. honestly my heart broke so much that day - take care of undocumented people in your life because they deserve so much better than this ffs. this woman is so very evil and has a black heart and i hope she rots in prison

itsatru: welcometonegrotown: last year when i was teaching 11th grade one of my fav students came in crying so i put the class on a filler ...

Amazon, Drunk, and Internet: old man bangers @FindusPancake My mum was teaching first holy communion class, and a kid asked her "How many communions do vou have to do before you've eaten a whole Jesus?" 24/3/18, 8:48 am 10K Retweets 35.1K Likes sindri42: xanderbot13: gannayev: spiletta42: ragnell: danbensen: exxos-von-steamboldt: ralfmaximus: moogloogle: ralfmaximus: tobaeus: ralfmaximus: nyxetoile: antibutch: thats a valid question A communion wafer, according to the internet, is about .25g. Jesus was a healthy young man, who worked manual labor and walked everywhere. The average male in Biblical times was 5′1″ and about 110 pounds so call it 50kg or 50,000 grams. So 200,000 wafers to make up a whole Jesus. At one wafer a week that’s 3846 to eat a whole Jesus at weekly communion. If you went to Mass daily you could do it in under 550 years. 1000 communion wafers from Amazon costs $15, so acquiring a Jesus load would set you back about $3000 But that’s just the body. Jesus also bade his followers to drink his blood. How much of that Jesus communion wafer supply needs to be replaced with communion wine to account for his blood, and how much of that would need to be consumed to have drunk all his blood as well? The human body contains roughly 5 liters of blood. Communion wine costs about $66 for a case of 12 x 750 ml bottles (9000 ml). So half a case is 4500 ml, or close enough if Jesus was on the small side which is reasonable given what we know of the times. Thus, Jesus’ blood would be about 6 bottles of communion wine, costing $33. How much of his weight was his blood, now? We can bring down the wafer count. Osnap what an excellent question. Water has a specific gravity of 1.0 and weighs 1kg/liter. Wine has a specific gravity if 1.5 thus weighs 1.5kg per liter. 4.5L of wine would weigh 6.75kg or about 15 pounds. Reducing the wafer load by 6.75kg yields 43.25kg so call it 161,000 wafers or $2450 and change. @danbensen Full Metal Eucharist The Unholy Union of Catholic Tumblr and Math Tumblr This is one of those posts I will absolutely email to every pastor I know. @garpfloyd If you just buy a sack of wafers, that’s just bread. To get the transubstatntiation going you need to have a priest perform the full ritual over them. By which I mean an entire Mass for every like, plateful? If you cut out the songs and use pretty short readings you could probably get one churned out every half-hour or so…
Amazon, Drunk, and Internet: old man bangers
 @FindusPancake
 My mum was teaching first holy
 communion class, and a kid asked her
 "How many communions do vou have
 to do before you've eaten a whole
 Jesus?"
 24/3/18, 8:48 am
 10K Retweets 35.1K Likes
sindri42:
xanderbot13:

gannayev:


spiletta42:

ragnell:

danbensen:

exxos-von-steamboldt:


ralfmaximus:

moogloogle:

ralfmaximus:


tobaeus:


ralfmaximus:

nyxetoile:


antibutch:
thats a valid question
A communion wafer, according to the internet, is about .25g. Jesus was a healthy young man, who worked manual labor and walked everywhere. The average male in Biblical times was 5′1″ and about 110 pounds so call it 50kg or 50,000 grams. So 200,000 wafers to make up a whole Jesus. At one wafer a week that’s 3846 to eat a whole Jesus at weekly communion. If you went to Mass daily you could do it in under 550 years.


1000 communion wafers from Amazon costs $15, so acquiring a Jesus load would set you back about $3000

But that’s just the body. Jesus also bade his followers to drink his blood. How much of that Jesus communion wafer supply needs to be replaced with communion wine to account for his blood, and how much of that would need to be consumed to have drunk all his blood as well?


The human body contains roughly 5 liters of blood.
Communion wine costs about $66 for a case of 12 x 750 ml bottles (9000 ml).
So half a case is 4500 ml, or close enough if Jesus was on the small side which is reasonable given what we know of the times.
Thus, Jesus’ blood would be about 6 bottles of communion wine, costing $33.


How much of his weight was his blood, now? We can bring down the wafer count. 

Osnap what an excellent question.
Water has a specific gravity of 1.0 and weighs 1kg/liter. Wine has a specific gravity if 1.5 thus weighs 1.5kg per liter.
4.5L of wine would weigh 6.75kg or about 15 pounds.
Reducing the wafer load by 6.75kg yields 43.25kg so call it 161,000 wafers or $2450 and change.

@danbensen


Full Metal Eucharist

The Unholy Union of Catholic Tumblr and Math Tumblr
This is one of those posts I will absolutely email to every pastor I know.



@garpfloyd 

If you just buy a sack of wafers, that’s just bread. To get the transubstatntiation going you need to have a priest perform the full ritual over them. By which I mean an entire Mass for every like, plateful? If you cut out the songs and use pretty short readings you could probably get one churned out every half-hour or so…

sindri42: xanderbot13: gannayev: spiletta42: ragnell: danbensen: exxos-von-steamboldt: ralfmaximus: moogloogle: ralfmaximus: tob...

Another One, Bad, and Barbie: er er KINDER SURPRISE 2OG KINGER SURPRISE T-1 1.17 KS GIRLS 20G KINDER SURPRISE GIRL 1.17 thoughts-of-an-x-factor: ohgressfuriosa: castiel-knight-of-hell: jen-kollic: thejollity: jen-kollic: hobopoppins: manaphy: wow I didn’t know fuckin chocolate eggs were gendered OKAY LET ME TELL YOU A STORY ABOUT THE FUCKING PINK EGGS. I work at a concession stand in an ice rink. We sell a bunch of chocolate bars and snacks and shit including Kinder Surprise eggs. So one day this woman comes up to the counter with her two little kids, a girl who’s probably about 6 or 7 and a little boy, maybe 3 or 4. The mom asks what they want, the little girl points at the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if she wanted the white or the pink egg. She said pink. The little boy pointed to the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if he wanted the white or the pink egg. He said pink. HOLY SHIT IT WAS LIKE I OPENED THE GATES OF HELL. The mom absolutely FLIPPED and was like “YOU ARE NOT GETTING THE PINK EGG IT’S ONLY FOR GIRLS. YOU CAN GET THE WHITE ONE OR NOTHING AT ALL”. The little boy looked at his mom and said “But I want the same as ______ (whatever the sister’s name was)”. The mom completely ignored him and turned to me and gave me a death glare. “He can have the white egg.” I had to give a little boy a white egg when he wanted the pink so that he could be the same as his big sister and he started crying. The mom just reiterated that the pink egg was for girls and told him that boys don’t cry. And this is why we shouldn’t gender fucking chocolate eggs. This is actually a relatively new thing, originally Kinder Eggs were all white like the ones on the left. I don’t know at what point they decided to make ‘girl’s’ Kinder Eggs, but I do not like it. Holy shit do not even get me started on how moms constantly police their sons’ masculinity. I’ve seen mothers do it WAY more often than fathers. I used to work at a bakery that specialized in creating custom cakes. We had this feature where we could print out any image off the computer and put it on a cake (with rice paper). One day this lady comes in and asks for an image we had of the baby Sesame Street characters. They’re all together with cake and confetti, and she asks, “Oh, well since it’s a boy, can you please change all of the little pink confettis into blue confetti? I mean, he’s a boy, you know.” Confetti. The fucking confetti. It barely covered 5% of the image. Another instance was when a lady asked me for an image of four superheroes to put on her son’s cake because her son was turning four. She admitted to not knowing any superheroes, so I offered the most obvious choice—The Fantastic Four. I pulled up a picture of them and she goes, “Oh no no, we can’t have that. Let’s do another one.” Confused, I pulled up a Justice League one with Batman, Superman, The Flash, and Wonder Woman. Again, she said no. I asked her if she needed anything specific (she didn’t know superheroes, why was she so picky?), and she just said, “Oh, it’s just that he’s a boy, you know? We can’t have a girl superhero on his cake.” I nearly lost my shit. I did temporarily lose my customer service face and ask why, women have been superheroes all the time, Wonder Woman is iconic, etc etc and she was like, “It’s just that my son has been playing with Barbie dolls lately and I really don’t want him to end up… well, you know.” This shit has got to stop. When you teach boys that certain things are only for girls, you’re limiting them and you’re teaching them that girls or “girly things” are bad. If you want gender equality as an adult, you better make DAMN sure that you’re teaching the same thing to your kids. So this woman did not want her son to turn out ‘you know’ and her plan for that was to get him a cake with spandex-clad manly men AND ONLY MEN on it? I don’t think she thought that one through too well… in sociology class we were talking about gender being assigned to objects and one of the male students started saying how forward thinking he is because he buys his daughter sports equipment and “boy toys”. I asked if he’d do the same if he had a son and he said “Of course I’d buy my son sports equipment”. I clarified “No, would you buy him dolls and other toys that are thought of as being for girls”. He turned around and didn’t answer. Parents will pat themselves on the back for letting their little girls play baseball but a little boy with a Barbie is still considered an affront to society Fuck everything. My father was one of these parents (along with several other harmful issues!), and even though I know, for an absolute fact, that his world views and ways are entirely wrong, this shit he tried to ingrain into me still effects me to this day.Parents, don’t ruin your fucking kids by treating them like this.
Another One, Bad, and Barbie: er
 er
 KINDER SURPRISE
 2OG KINGER SURPRISE T-1
 1.17
 KS GIRLS
 20G KINDER SURPRISE GIRL
 1.17
thoughts-of-an-x-factor:

ohgressfuriosa:

castiel-knight-of-hell:

jen-kollic:

thejollity:

jen-kollic:

hobopoppins:

manaphy:
wow I didn’t know fuckin chocolate eggs were gendered
OKAY LET ME TELL YOU A STORY ABOUT THE FUCKING PINK EGGS.
I work at a concession stand in an ice rink. We sell a bunch of chocolate bars and snacks and shit including Kinder Surprise eggs.
So one day this woman comes up to the counter with her two little kids, a girl who’s probably about 6 or 7 and a little boy, maybe 3 or 4. The mom asks what they want, the little girl points at the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if she wanted the white or the pink egg. She said pink. The little boy pointed to the Kinder eggs and says “One of those!”. I asked if he wanted the white or the pink egg. He said pink. HOLY SHIT IT WAS LIKE I OPENED THE GATES OF HELL. The mom absolutely FLIPPED and was like “YOU ARE NOT GETTING THE PINK EGG IT’S ONLY FOR GIRLS. YOU CAN GET THE WHITE ONE OR NOTHING AT ALL”. The little boy looked at his mom and said “But I want the same as ______ (whatever the sister’s name was)”. The mom completely ignored him and turned to me and gave me a death glare. “He can have the white egg.”
I had to give a little boy a white egg when he wanted the pink so that he could be the same as his big sister and he started crying. The mom just reiterated that the pink egg was for girls and told him that boys don’t cry.
And this is why we shouldn’t gender fucking chocolate eggs.

This is actually a relatively new thing, originally Kinder Eggs were all white like the ones on the left. I don’t know at what point they decided to make ‘girl’s’ Kinder Eggs, but I do not like it.

Holy shit do not even get me started on how moms constantly police their sons’ masculinity. I’ve seen mothers do it WAY more often than fathers.
I used to work at a bakery that specialized in creating custom cakes. We had this feature where we could print out any image off the computer and put it on a cake (with rice paper). One day this lady comes in and asks for an image we had of the baby Sesame Street characters. They’re all together with cake and confetti, and she asks, “Oh, well since it’s a boy, can you please change all of the little pink confettis into blue confetti? I mean, he’s a boy, you know.”
Confetti.
The fucking confetti.
It barely covered 5% of the image.
Another instance was when a lady asked me for an image of four superheroes to put on her son’s cake because her son was turning four. She admitted to not knowing any superheroes, so I offered the most obvious choice—The Fantastic Four. I pulled up a picture of them and she goes, “Oh no no, we can’t have that. Let’s do another one.” Confused, I pulled up a Justice League one with Batman, Superman, The Flash, and Wonder Woman. Again, she said no. I asked her if she needed anything specific (she didn’t know superheroes, why was she so picky?), and she just said, “Oh, it’s just that he’s a boy, you know? We can’t have a girl superhero on his cake.”
I nearly lost my shit. I did temporarily lose my customer service face and ask why, women have been superheroes all the time, Wonder Woman is iconic, etc etc and she was like, “It’s just that my son has been playing with Barbie dolls lately and I really don’t want him to end up… well, you know.”
This shit has got to stop. When you teach boys that certain things are only for girls, you’re limiting them and you’re teaching them that girls or “girly things” are bad. If you want gender equality as an adult, you better make DAMN sure that you’re teaching the same thing to your kids.

So this woman did not want her son to turn out ‘you know’ and her plan for that was to get him a cake with spandex-clad manly men AND ONLY MEN on it? I don’t think she thought that one through too well…

in sociology class we were talking about gender being assigned to objects and one of the male students started saying how forward thinking he is because he buys his daughter sports equipment and “boy toys”. I asked if he’d do the same if he had a son and he said “Of course I’d buy my son sports equipment”. I clarified “No, would you buy him dolls and other toys that are thought of as being for girls”. He turned around and didn’t answer.
Parents will pat themselves on the back for letting their little girls play baseball but a little boy with a Barbie is still considered an affront to society


Fuck everything.

My father was one of these parents (along with several other harmful issues!), and even though I know, for an absolute fact, that his world views and ways are entirely wrong, this shit he tried to ingrain into me still effects me to this day.Parents, don’t ruin your fucking kids by treating them like this.

thoughts-of-an-x-factor: ohgressfuriosa: castiel-knight-of-hell: jen-kollic: thejollity: jen-kollic: hobopoppins: manaphy: wow I didn...