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Baked, Bless Up, and Booty: Saw this good boy waiting outside a bakers for his human in Rosyth, Scotland Pic: reddit u/MacSquizzy @ DrSmashlove Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the hands to the throat is the international sign for “I’m choking” (also the international sign for “choke me daddy” 😬), handing a man a container full of fresh baked cookies or fudge lets him know u felt the D in your soul 💕. Sometimes a lady will give u the cookies in plastic Tupperware. Always a wonderful touch. This says: “here is some reusable Tupperware, daddy. Remember me when you order Thai food and need somewhere to store your leftover pad Thai 😌.” But see some of u ladies wanna go the extra mile. This type of lady wanna give u them warm, chewy cookies in one of them extremely classy glass containers with a plastic lid. One of them Pyrex or Anchor Hocking joints. This ain’t just about cookies bruv. This is an entirely different statement. She giving u a high grade reusable container that u can use over and over. U can heat up some soup in there. Throw some veggies in there for an afternoon snack. U feel me? There are Myriad uses for this wondrous technology bruv. This a bold statement. She improving yo life. She saying “thank you for the pipe daddy, you upgraded my Punani, so in return I’m gonna upgrade your entire existence. I opened your fridge and saw you storing leftovers in a Cool Whip container, that’s no way to live daddy 😌 here’s something that will give your leftovers better flavor 🤗.” Bam. Now every time u use it, u think of how she low key upgraded you. Now I’m not saying u ladies owe a man this type of sweetness just for good D. Shiiiiiit u DESERVE good D! That’s off the top! A man shouldn’t be rewarded for merely performing his Duty To The Thee Booty! But if he do, and if u bequeath uponst him Thee Glassware, just know that he gon love both the cookies and the container and the fondness in his heart will only increase. A lot of these men out here was raised by wolves. If he fulfilling his duties as yo daddy, it don’t hurt to be his mommy 🤗 TheresNoHopeForOurGenerarion 😂 p.s. ALWAYS OFFER TO RETURN IT - IF SHE TAKE IT BACK, U JUST A SIDE PIECE. TEMPORARY TUPPERWARE = TEMPORARY D, BLESS UP 🤗😂
Baked, Bless Up, and Booty: Saw this good boy waiting outside a bakers for
 his human in Rosyth, Scotland
 Pic: reddit u/MacSquizzy
 @ DrSmashlove
Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the hands to the throat is the international sign for “I’m choking” (also the international sign for “choke me daddy” 😬), handing a man a container full of fresh baked cookies or fudge lets him know u felt the D in your soul 💕. Sometimes a lady will give u the cookies in plastic Tupperware. Always a wonderful touch. This says: “here is some reusable Tupperware, daddy. Remember me when you order Thai food and need somewhere to store your leftover pad Thai 😌.” But see some of u ladies wanna go the extra mile. This type of lady wanna give u them warm, chewy cookies in one of them extremely classy glass containers with a plastic lid. One of them Pyrex or Anchor Hocking joints. This ain’t just about cookies bruv. This is an entirely different statement. She giving u a high grade reusable container that u can use over and over. U can heat up some soup in there. Throw some veggies in there for an afternoon snack. U feel me? There are Myriad uses for this wondrous technology bruv. This a bold statement. She improving yo life. She saying “thank you for the pipe daddy, you upgraded my Punani, so in return I’m gonna upgrade your entire existence. I opened your fridge and saw you storing leftovers in a Cool Whip container, that’s no way to live daddy 😌 here’s something that will give your leftovers better flavor 🤗.” Bam. Now every time u use it, u think of how she low key upgraded you. Now I’m not saying u ladies owe a man this type of sweetness just for good D. Shiiiiiit u DESERVE good D! That’s off the top! A man shouldn’t be rewarded for merely performing his Duty To The Thee Booty! But if he do, and if u bequeath uponst him Thee Glassware, just know that he gon love both the cookies and the container and the fondness in his heart will only increase. A lot of these men out here was raised by wolves. If he fulfilling his duties as yo daddy, it don’t hurt to be his mommy 🤗 TheresNoHopeForOurGenerarion 😂 p.s. ALWAYS OFFER TO RETURN IT - IF SHE TAKE IT BACK, U JUST A SIDE PIECE. TEMPORARY TUPPERWARE = TEMPORARY D, BLESS UP 🤗😂

Men as I told y’all if u lay pipe skillfully and dutifully to a pretty ting, she might fvck around and bake for u. Just like placing the han...

Kendrick Lamar, Memes, and Smashing: Solange Leads 2017 Soul Train Awards With Seven Nominations @balleralert Solange Leads 2017 Soul Train Awards With Seven Nominations– blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Next Month, BET will kick off its 2017 Soul Train Awards in Las Vegas. The ceremony will provide a platform for several artists to be honored for their longstanding careers and influence, as well as their work for the year. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ToniBraxton will be honored with the Don Cornelius Legend Award, while the R&B trio SWV will be honored with the Lady of Soul Award. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Award show will give out awards for Best New Artist, Best R&B-Soul Male and Female Artist, Soul Train Certified Award, Video Of The Year and more. In this year’s lineup, Solange is the most nominated artist with seven nominations, including best R&B-Soul Female Artist and Video and Song Of The Year for her hit song, “Cranes In The Sky.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ However, trailing close behind with six, is none other than BrunoMars for his critically-acclaimed and RIAA-certified double platinum album, “24K Magic.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Cardi B has also been nominated for her smash hit, “Bodak Yellow,” competing against Kendrick Lamar, French Montana and Yo Gotti for the Rhythm & Bars Award. SZA has picked up a couple nominations for Best New Artists and Best R&B- Soul Female Artists, where she will be up against Kehlani, Mary J. Blige, Solange and more. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The show will air on BET, Nov. 26. Will you be tuning in?
Kendrick Lamar, Memes, and Smashing: Solange Leads 2017 Soul Train
 Awards With Seven Nominations
 @balleralert
Solange Leads 2017 Soul Train Awards With Seven Nominations– blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Next Month, BET will kick off its 2017 Soul Train Awards in Las Vegas. The ceremony will provide a platform for several artists to be honored for their longstanding careers and influence, as well as their work for the year. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ToniBraxton will be honored with the Don Cornelius Legend Award, while the R&B trio SWV will be honored with the Lady of Soul Award. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Award show will give out awards for Best New Artist, Best R&B-Soul Male and Female Artist, Soul Train Certified Award, Video Of The Year and more. In this year’s lineup, Solange is the most nominated artist with seven nominations, including best R&B-Soul Female Artist and Video and Song Of The Year for her hit song, “Cranes In The Sky.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ However, trailing close behind with six, is none other than BrunoMars for his critically-acclaimed and RIAA-certified double platinum album, “24K Magic.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Cardi B has also been nominated for her smash hit, “Bodak Yellow,” competing against Kendrick Lamar, French Montana and Yo Gotti for the Rhythm & Bars Award. SZA has picked up a couple nominations for Best New Artists and Best R&B- Soul Female Artists, where she will be up against Kehlani, Mary J. Blige, Solange and more. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The show will air on BET, Nov. 26. Will you be tuning in?

Solange Leads 2017 Soul Train Awards With Seven Nominations– blogged by @MsJennyb ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Next Month, BET will kick off its 2017 Sou...

Bad, Bitch, and Friends: Lara Witt @Femmefeministe We shouldn't have to out ourselves as survivors in order for people to grasp the magnitude of how systemic assault & harassment are. #MeToo 10/15/17, 7:07 PM This is not to say that MeToo is a bad thing at all; just that, once again, the burden falls on the oppressed group (people who have been assaulted-harassed) to appeal to the moral sense of their oppressors. @femmefeministe explains, "Each time I pour my soul into a piece about assault, I draw out words and put them together with the hope that someone will feel connected or some sense of solidarity. I write for victims, but I also write for those who don’t know what it’s like, I have written with the hope that those of you who have never felt themselves shredded and stripped of their autonomy will hear us and fight alongside us because we need more people to stand up against rape culture. We march, we carry signs, we hold hands, we cry, we scream — but who’s listening? Sometimes it feels as if no matter how many times we write our stories, no matter how many statistics we show you, you don’t really care. For a moment you ingest our pain; you read details and see flashes of images pushed into the sentences we stitch together. Perhaps you almost feel a sense of revulsion, or even guilt. You think we were raped by monsters, but the people in our nightmares are people like your fathers, your brothers, your friends... How many stories will we have to write for you to care? Or have you read too many of our horrors? Are you desensitized now? Your friend made a rape joke, but hey, he’s a good guy. Right? I won’t tell you about the person who destroyed me. I won’t tell you about the scars. I won’t tell you about the night terrors or the depression or the anxiety or loneliness — because, to you, I’m just another bitch who was probably asking for it. I’m a statistic you will forget, these words of mine, you will forget but I will go back to bed and not have the luxury of forgetting. I am tired of proving to you just how difficult it is to recover. I cannot do that labor anymore. The numbers are out there for you to research: the essays, the songs, the art and the speeches are there for you to absorb and carry within your heart so that perhaps one day you can find the time to actually help us dismantle rape culture.”
Bad, Bitch, and Friends: Lara Witt
 @Femmefeministe
 We shouldn't have to out
 ourselves as survivors in order
 for people to grasp the
 magnitude of how systemic
 assault & harassment are.
 #MeToo
 10/15/17, 7:07 PM
This is not to say that MeToo is a bad thing at all; just that, once again, the burden falls on the oppressed group (people who have been assaulted-harassed) to appeal to the moral sense of their oppressors. @femmefeministe explains, "Each time I pour my soul into a piece about assault, I draw out words and put them together with the hope that someone will feel connected or some sense of solidarity. I write for victims, but I also write for those who don’t know what it’s like, I have written with the hope that those of you who have never felt themselves shredded and stripped of their autonomy will hear us and fight alongside us because we need more people to stand up against rape culture. We march, we carry signs, we hold hands, we cry, we scream — but who’s listening? Sometimes it feels as if no matter how many times we write our stories, no matter how many statistics we show you, you don’t really care. For a moment you ingest our pain; you read details and see flashes of images pushed into the sentences we stitch together. Perhaps you almost feel a sense of revulsion, or even guilt. You think we were raped by monsters, but the people in our nightmares are people like your fathers, your brothers, your friends... How many stories will we have to write for you to care? Or have you read too many of our horrors? Are you desensitized now? Your friend made a rape joke, but hey, he’s a good guy. Right? I won’t tell you about the person who destroyed me. I won’t tell you about the scars. I won’t tell you about the night terrors or the depression or the anxiety or loneliness — because, to you, I’m just another bitch who was probably asking for it. I’m a statistic you will forget, these words of mine, you will forget but I will go back to bed and not have the luxury of forgetting. I am tired of proving to you just how difficult it is to recover. I cannot do that labor anymore. The numbers are out there for you to research: the essays, the songs, the art and the speeches are there for you to absorb and carry within your heart so that perhaps one day you can find the time to actually help us dismantle rape culture.”

This is not to say that MeToo is a bad thing at all; just that, once again, the burden falls on the oppressed group (people who have been as...

Ass, Beautiful, and Bitch: When she takes you back to her place and you notice some red flags but you play it off cuz you're trying to get your dick wet teel very welcome here. When you trying to catch some soul snatching, toes curling, meat coiling. Metal twisting, ducks flapping, cows chirping, ball jiggling , nipples burning head nothing can come in the way. If I had a choice between answering grandpa Dales life alert call or that 2am you up text, Ima be excavating that pussy like the Miranda trench. I nut quick so I’ll be back in time to assist with his life alert. I hate sex. No honestly it’s complicated. You gotta find a apropoate time, place, what if she’s on her period that week? I don’t bang with that blood shit. Not to mention feelings can be caught like receivers, stds transferred like a bus ride, and hope crushed like a cervix. When them beautiful ebony cheeks spread and that feeling of paradise cause her walls to talk. Color coordinated and all that was a pipe dream. When there was chocolate mud cake waiting for me. Me, being the genuine guy that I am. Notified this girl there was shit in her ass. Bitch dead giggled and said stop lien. This probably the worse times for me to play 2 truths and a lie. What do you do when she doesn’t believe you? What you think I did? I love finger painting. When life gives you lemon make lemonade.
Ass, Beautiful, and Bitch: When she takes you back to her
 place and you notice some red
 flags but you play it off cuz you're
 trying to get your dick wet
 teel very welcome here.
When you trying to catch some soul snatching, toes curling, meat coiling. Metal twisting, ducks flapping, cows chirping, ball jiggling , nipples burning head nothing can come in the way. If I had a choice between answering grandpa Dales life alert call or that 2am you up text, Ima be excavating that pussy like the Miranda trench. I nut quick so I’ll be back in time to assist with his life alert. I hate sex. No honestly it’s complicated. You gotta find a apropoate time, place, what if she’s on her period that week? I don’t bang with that blood shit. Not to mention feelings can be caught like receivers, stds transferred like a bus ride, and hope crushed like a cervix. When them beautiful ebony cheeks spread and that feeling of paradise cause her walls to talk. Color coordinated and all that was a pipe dream. When there was chocolate mud cake waiting for me. Me, being the genuine guy that I am. Notified this girl there was shit in her ass. Bitch dead giggled and said stop lien. This probably the worse times for me to play 2 truths and a lie. What do you do when she doesn’t believe you? What you think I did? I love finger painting. When life gives you lemon make lemonade.

When you trying to catch some soul snatching, toes curling, meat coiling. Metal twisting, ducks flapping, cows chirping, ball jiggling , nip...

Aww, Bad, and Bless Up: r/aww u/bad_girlz ld imgur 150 Pound French Mastiff gets a kiss from a 6 pound Chihuahua Yesterday I discussed the poor hygiene of some of my brothers out here whose PPs is uncut. One of my followers had this to say: “I went to a dude's place for a wake up call and he knew I was coming. Pulled that skin back, and there was literally sh!t the consistency of- *BAM*. The smell hit and I started heaving and had to run to the bathroom. He had the nerve to try to clean himself, but the smell was either permeating his room or stuck in my nostrils\lungs\long-term memory. He took me to Olive Garden (because pasta and breadsticks usually makes me forget everything), but I saw some white sauce and started heaving at the table. Like, the drools started bruh. I think it was literally the last time we attempted $ex and our fvckship ended soon after. He's somewhere with no job and live with a brother at 41 years of age. His life could have been worth more if he cleaned himself that morning.” Ok. Hol up. Lemme just...lemme catch my breath...and...lemme...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA FVCK. 😂 NAW. NAW NAW NAW 😂. As basic Caucasian women say: “literally dead”. As the big homie Popiando would say, “deadass b. The Deadest of Asses.” I read this and my soul exited my body. Literally I exhaled my last breath and my soul said “bish I’m meeting God now” and my soul got to the gates of Heaven and Gabriel said“WHO IS YOUR LORD!” and I tried to say “there is no deity except God” and instead I opened my mouth and said “the ting goes SCREEEE RA PAT PAT PAT PAK CAC CA” and Gabriel flung me into Hell Bruh. Deceased. Let’s recount: (1) PP smelled like a Funeral Home and Crematorium for roadkill skunks. (2) Even the finest of middle class fancy dinners could not repair the damage. (3) After this incident, his entire life crumbled and he is now not only stinky but homeless, depressed, unemployed and desperate. I’m still dead. I still haven’t recovered. Y’all out here stroking my ego saying I’m funny...THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ. MEN: DOVE SOAP. WARM WATER. YALL OUT HERE ALTERING THE ENTIRE TRAJECTORY OF YA LIFE OFF YA PP SMELL. SHOWER NOW BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE. YALL BEEN WARNED 🤗 (credit the genius @tamashar - Big Sis! U murdered me 😂 bless up 😂😂😂)
Aww, Bad, and Bless Up: r/aww
 u/bad_girlz ld imgur
 150 Pound French Mastiff gets a kiss
 from a 6 pound Chihuahua
Yesterday I discussed the poor hygiene of some of my brothers out here whose PPs is uncut. One of my followers had this to say: “I went to a dude's place for a wake up call and he knew I was coming. Pulled that skin back, and there was literally sh!t the consistency of- *BAM*. The smell hit and I started heaving and had to run to the bathroom. He had the nerve to try to clean himself, but the smell was either permeating his room or stuck in my nostrils\lungs\long-term memory. He took me to Olive Garden (because pasta and breadsticks usually makes me forget everything), but I saw some white sauce and started heaving at the table. Like, the drools started bruh. I think it was literally the last time we attempted $ex and our fvckship ended soon after. He's somewhere with no job and live with a brother at 41 years of age. His life could have been worth more if he cleaned himself that morning.” Ok. Hol up. Lemme just...lemme catch my breath...and...lemme...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA FVCK. 😂 NAW. NAW NAW NAW 😂. As basic Caucasian women say: “literally dead”. As the big homie Popiando would say, “deadass b. The Deadest of Asses.” I read this and my soul exited my body. Literally I exhaled my last breath and my soul said “bish I’m meeting God now” and my soul got to the gates of Heaven and Gabriel said“WHO IS YOUR LORD!” and I tried to say “there is no deity except God” and instead I opened my mouth and said “the ting goes SCREEEE RA PAT PAT PAT PAK CAC CA” and Gabriel flung me into Hell Bruh. Deceased. Let’s recount: (1) PP smelled like a Funeral Home and Crematorium for roadkill skunks. (2) Even the finest of middle class fancy dinners could not repair the damage. (3) After this incident, his entire life crumbled and he is now not only stinky but homeless, depressed, unemployed and desperate. I’m still dead. I still haven’t recovered. Y’all out here stroking my ego saying I’m funny...THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ. MEN: DOVE SOAP. WARM WATER. YALL OUT HERE ALTERING THE ENTIRE TRAJECTORY OF YA LIFE OFF YA PP SMELL. SHOWER NOW BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE. YALL BEEN WARNED 🤗 (credit the genius @tamashar - Big Sis! U murdered me 😂 bless up 😂😂😂)

Yesterday I discussed the poor hygiene of some of my brothers out here whose PPs is uncut. One of my followers had this to say: “I went to a...