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Advice, Anna, and Dad: You're the mother, he's That's not what l've been told but... the father. He has as much right to take that child as you do. ns Well, if you've gotten different advice, you Okay. were mistaken. ..including judges and probation officers, who still don't get that message... In this country, fathers are not second-class citizens. I know there are a lot of people out there... ...but fathers are not Not always. Sometimes second-class citizens. it's 50-50 but it's a Sometimes they're actually better parents. case-by-case basis. But anybody that says.it's not yours. It's both to me 'he can't take my of yours. You made her daughter with him... together. gaylibertariansc: queer-anna: matriarchyforeveryone: michaelam1978: I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child. The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother! My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. Still a good one
Advice, Anna, and Dad: You're the mother, he's
 That's not what l've
 been told but...
 the father. He has as
 much right to take that
 child as you do.
 ns

 Well, if you've gotten
 different advice, you
 Okay.
 were mistaken.

 ..including judges and
 probation officers, who
 still don't get that
 message...
 In this country, fathers
 are not second-class
 citizens. I know there
 are a lot of people out
 there...

 ...but fathers are not
 Not always. Sometimes
 second-class citizens.
 it's 50-50 but it's a
 Sometimes they're
 actually better parents.
 case-by-case basis.

 But anybody that says.it's not yours. It's both
 to me 'he can't take my of yours. You made her
 daughter with him...
 together.
gaylibertariansc:
queer-anna:

matriarchyforeveryone:


michaelam1978:
I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve

 and obviously disappointed mom who thinks dad doesn’t have any right to their child.
The mother carried that girl nine months in her stomach and then pushed her out of her body. No, the father does NOT have even remotely the same rights to the child as the mother!


My mother carried me for nine months in her stomach and then pushed me out of her body. 
My mother also got drunk and refused to feed me or my three siblings and forced my oldest brother to cook for us while she was passed-out drunk on the couch. 
My father has fought for us for as long as I can remember, while my mother was busy getting drinking straight-vodka and brainwashing us to think my father was the evil one. 
I nearly starved at age 6 because my mother was too drunk to cook half of the time. I had to dress my 4 year old sister for school, at age six. I had to walk in heavy snow at age 6 with my 4 year old sister to a bus stop to ride to school. 
My father has fought a long, long time to get custody of us. He deeply loves us. My mother has never, ever done anything like that. She has never nursed me when I had the flu, or kissed me goodnight, or told me she loved me. She has never taught me how to tie my shoes, or how to brush my hair, or how to take care of myself. 
Yes, my mother carried me, and three other kids, to term and successfully gave birth, but only has my father put 100% of his life into something that should require two people to do. 


Still a good one

gaylibertariansc: queer-anna: matriarchyforeveryone: michaelam1978: I love this! Judge Judy schools a naïve and obviously disappointed ...

Ass, College, and England: pinky–heart: lacinari: himynameisizzy: ressila: z-yess: ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday: grunge-aesthetic-lover: Over 75% of people lie on social media ‼️ The truth is that people tend to lie on social networks. How? First, people directly lie about their lives, which is often an effort to make themselves look more desirable or positive. In a study examining 80 online daters, Hancock, Toma, and Ellison found that two thirds of participants lied about their weight by five pounds or more. In a large sample of over 2000 people in England conducted by Custard.com, 43 percent of men admitted to making up facts about themselves and their lives that were not true online. Even more commonly, people “lie” by presenting an image of themselves and their lives that is imprecise or less than comprehensive, leading the viewer to believe falsehoods. For example, in the Custard.com study, only 18 percent of men and 19 percent of women reported that their Facebook page displayed “a completely accurate reflection” of who they are. Most commonly, participants said that they only shared “non-boring” aspects of their lives (32 percent) and were not as “active” as their social media accounts appeared (14 percent). Indeed, a growing body of research suggests that social media use can negatively affect your psychological health, particularly if you compare yourself to the positive images you see online. In a study of 339 college women (Puglia, 2017), the tendency to compare oneself to others was associated with poorer body esteem. Furthermore, in a sub-sample of 58 women in the Puglia study, those with higher levels of Facebook usage displayed lower body satisfaction than those with lower Facebook usage. Similarly, in an experimental study by Vogel and colleagues, participants who tended to compare themselves to others more regularly had lower self-esteem, more negative emotions, and a poorer view of themselves after using Facebook than participants who did not tend to compare themselves to others.  Consequently, when engaging with social media, it is critical to remind yourself that what you see is not an accurate picture of reality. Don’t compare yourself to the images of friends, colleagues, or celebrities. Remind yourself that it is just a snapshot of their life—and one that they want you to see. –> YOU CAN GET SOCIAL MEDIA SERIOUSLY HARMS YOUR MENTAL HEALTH PHONE CASE HERE <– Every purchase supports The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention the nation’s largest non-profit dedicated to saving lives and bringing hope to those affected by suicide. Fake life for “like’s” of people, which you will not meet =) And this is our future? Thank’s, but I don’t want to be a part of this madness. Who’s with me? My brother never had a social media account ever in his life, not Facebook or Instagram and he is only 23 years old. his life is worry free and he only does things for himself not to impress others, He is living a happy life I am working on being like him I really love this message. It’s proven that social media increases depression and loneliness. Just live your life and stop worrying about others to compare yourself, you will never be happy this way.  I really don’t get why people feel the need to lie about their lives to people they’ll never meet. Just be fuckin honest🙄 So I’ve been wanting this case for a week and I get to show off my new white xr while also sharing an important message about social media being harmful to your mental health. I like this case a lot and more people need to realize the harm of social media. Question: Does Social Media Seriously Harms Your Mental Health?Answer: Yesssss!! I could go on and on about this.Social media as a whole, particularly Instagram, a place where people Look extremely High Fashioned but really Under Paid.Where self-worthy is based on how many likes, views and comments our posts gets. It’s B.S if you ask me:/ Seen friends who care more bout portraying an image and worry more about Trivial things( there’s more to life🤷🏻‍♂️). As soon as you open your social medias you will see something that will makes you think you’re being left behind. Being materialistic stuff or body image, anything really.Society teaches us that if our instagram posts don’t have a certain number of likes or views, our posts are not accepted of instagram quality posting given by society’s expectations and standards.On the flip side on the coin, social media is a really funny ass place, like you could LMAO day literally.POINT IS YOU DONT NEED SOCIAL APPROVAL TO KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH. YOU ARE LEGIT AWESOME! *USE SOCIAL MEDIA WISELY*
Ass, College, and England: pinky–heart:

lacinari:
himynameisizzy:

ressila:


z-yess:

ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday:

grunge-aesthetic-lover:

Over 75% of people lie on social media ‼️
The truth is that people tend to lie on social networks. How? First, people directly lie about their lives, which is often an effort to make themselves look more desirable or positive. In a study examining 80 online daters, Hancock, Toma, and Ellison found that two thirds of participants lied about their weight by five pounds or more. In a large sample of over 2000 people in England conducted by Custard.com, 43 percent of men admitted to making up facts about themselves and their lives that were not true online.
Even more commonly, people “lie” by presenting an image of themselves and their lives that is imprecise or less than comprehensive, leading the viewer to believe falsehoods. For example, in the Custard.com study, only 18 percent of men and 19 percent of women reported that their Facebook page displayed “a completely accurate reflection” of who they are. Most commonly, participants said that they only shared “non-boring” aspects of their lives (32 percent) and were not as “active” as their social media accounts appeared (14 percent). 
Indeed, a growing body of research suggests that social media use can negatively affect your psychological health, particularly if you compare yourself to the positive images you see online. In a study of 339 college women (Puglia, 2017), the tendency to compare oneself to others was associated with poorer body esteem. Furthermore, in a sub-sample of 58 women in the Puglia study, those with higher levels of Facebook usage displayed lower body satisfaction than those with lower Facebook usage. Similarly, in an experimental study by Vogel and colleagues, participants who tended to compare themselves to others more regularly had lower self-esteem, more negative emotions, and a poorer view of themselves after using Facebook than participants who did not tend to compare themselves to others. 
Consequently, when engaging with social media, it is critical to remind yourself that what you see is not an accurate picture of reality. Don’t compare yourself to the images of friends, colleagues, or celebrities. Remind yourself that it is just a snapshot of their life—and one that they want you to see.
–> YOU CAN GET SOCIAL MEDIA SERIOUSLY HARMS YOUR MENTAL HEALTH PHONE CASE HERE <–
Every purchase supports The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention the nation’s largest non-profit dedicated to saving lives and bringing hope to those affected by suicide.

Fake life for “like’s” of people, which you will not meet =) And this is our future? Thank’s, but I don’t want to be a part of this madness. Who’s with me?

My brother never had a social media account ever in his life, not Facebook or Instagram and he is only 23 years old. his life is worry free and he only does things for himself not to impress others, He is living a happy life I am working on being like him

I really love this message. It’s proven that social media increases depression and loneliness. Just live your life and stop worrying about others to compare yourself, you will never be happy this way. 


I really don’t get why people feel the need to lie about their lives to people they’ll never meet. Just be fuckin honest🙄

So I’ve been wanting this case for a week and I get to show off my new white xr while also sharing an important message about social media being harmful to your mental health. I like this case a lot and more people need to realize the harm of social media.

Question: Does Social Media Seriously Harms Your Mental Health?Answer: Yesssss!! I could go on and on about this.Social media as a whole, particularly Instagram, a place where people Look extremely High Fashioned but really Under Paid.Where self-worthy is based on how many likes, views and comments our posts gets. It’s B.S if you ask me:/ Seen friends who care more bout portraying an image and worry more about Trivial things( there’s more to life🤷🏻‍♂️). As soon as you open your social medias you will see something that will makes you think you’re being left behind. Being materialistic stuff or body image, anything really.Society teaches us that if our instagram posts don’t have a certain number of likes or views, our posts are not accepted of instagram quality posting given by society’s expectations and standards.On the flip side on the coin, social media is a really funny ass place, like you could LMAO day literally.POINT IS YOU DONT NEED SOCIAL APPROVAL TO KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH. YOU ARE LEGIT AWESOME! *USE SOCIAL MEDIA WISELY*

pinky–heart: lacinari: himynameisizzy: ressila: z-yess: ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday: grunge-aesthetic-lover: Over 75% of people lie on...

Ass, College, and England: pinky–heart: lacinari: himynameisizzy: ressila: z-yess: ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday: grunge-aesthetic-lover: Over 75% of people lie on social media ‼️ The truth is that people tend to lie on social networks. How? First, people directly lie about their lives, which is often an effort to make themselves look more desirable or positive. In a study examining 80 online daters, Hancock, Toma, and Ellison found that two thirds of participants lied about their weight by five pounds or more. In a large sample of over 2000 people in England conducted by Custard.com, 43 percent of men admitted to making up facts about themselves and their lives that were not true online. Even more commonly, people “lie” by presenting an image of themselves and their lives that is imprecise or less than comprehensive, leading the viewer to believe falsehoods. For example, in the Custard.com study, only 18 percent of men and 19 percent of women reported that their Facebook page displayed “a completely accurate reflection” of who they are. Most commonly, participants said that they only shared “non-boring” aspects of their lives (32 percent) and were not as “active” as their social media accounts appeared (14 percent). Indeed, a growing body of research suggests that social media use can negatively affect your psychological health, particularly if you compare yourself to the positive images you see online. In a study of 339 college women (Puglia, 2017), the tendency to compare oneself to others was associated with poorer body esteem. Furthermore, in a sub-sample of 58 women in the Puglia study, those with higher levels of Facebook usage displayed lower body satisfaction than those with lower Facebook usage. Similarly, in an experimental study by Vogel and colleagues, participants who tended to compare themselves to others more regularly had lower self-esteem, more negative emotions, and a poorer view of themselves after using Facebook than participants who did not tend to compare themselves to others.  Consequently, when engaging with social media, it is critical to remind yourself that what you see is not an accurate picture of reality. Don’t compare yourself to the images of friends, colleagues, or celebrities. Remind yourself that it is just a snapshot of their life—and one that they want you to see. –> YOU CAN GET SOCIAL MEDIA SERIOUSLY HARMS YOUR MENTAL HEALTH PHONE CASE HERE <– Every purchase supports The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention the nation’s largest non-profit dedicated to saving lives and bringing hope to those affected by suicide. Fake life for “like’s” of people, which you will not meet =) And this is our future? Thank’s, but I don’t want to be a part of this madness. Who’s with me? My brother never had a social media account ever in his life, not Facebook or Instagram and he is only 23 years old. his life is worry free and he only does things for himself not to impress others, He is living a happy life I am working on being like him I really love this message. It’s proven that social media increases depression and loneliness. Just live your life and stop worrying about others to compare yourself, you will never be happy this way.  I really don’t get why people feel the need to lie about their lives to people they’ll never meet. Just be fuckin honest🙄 So I’ve been wanting this case for a week and I get to show off my new white xr while also sharing an important message about social media being harmful to your mental health. I like this case a lot and more people need to realize the harm of social media. Question: Does Social Media Seriously Harms Your Mental Health?Answer: Yesssss!! I could go on and on about this.Social media as a whole, particularly Instagram, a place where people Look extremely High Fashioned but really Under Paid.Where self-worthy is based on how many likes, views and comments our posts gets. It’s B.S if you ask me:/ Seen friends who care more bout portraying an image and worry more about Trivial things( there’s more to life🤷🏻‍♂️). As soon as you open your social medias you will see something that will makes you think you’re being left behind. Being materialistic stuff or body image, anything really.Society teaches us that if our instagram posts don’t have a certain number of likes or views, our posts are not accepted of instagram quality posting given by society’s expectations and standards.On the flip side on the coin, social media is a really funny ass place, like you could LMAO day literally.POINT IS YOU DONT NEED SOCIAL APPROVAL TO KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH. YOU ARE LEGIT AWESOME! *USE SOCIAL MEDIA WISELY*
Ass, College, and England: pinky–heart:

lacinari:
himynameisizzy:

ressila:


z-yess:

ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday:

grunge-aesthetic-lover:

Over 75% of people lie on social media ‼️
The truth is that people tend to lie on social networks. How? First, people directly lie about their lives, which is often an effort to make themselves look more desirable or positive. In a study examining 80 online daters, Hancock, Toma, and Ellison found that two thirds of participants lied about their weight by five pounds or more. In a large sample of over 2000 people in England conducted by Custard.com, 43 percent of men admitted to making up facts about themselves and their lives that were not true online.
Even more commonly, people “lie” by presenting an image of themselves and their lives that is imprecise or less than comprehensive, leading the viewer to believe falsehoods. For example, in the Custard.com study, only 18 percent of men and 19 percent of women reported that their Facebook page displayed “a completely accurate reflection” of who they are. Most commonly, participants said that they only shared “non-boring” aspects of their lives (32 percent) and were not as “active” as their social media accounts appeared (14 percent). 
Indeed, a growing body of research suggests that social media use can negatively affect your psychological health, particularly if you compare yourself to the positive images you see online. In a study of 339 college women (Puglia, 2017), the tendency to compare oneself to others was associated with poorer body esteem. Furthermore, in a sub-sample of 58 women in the Puglia study, those with higher levels of Facebook usage displayed lower body satisfaction than those with lower Facebook usage. Similarly, in an experimental study by Vogel and colleagues, participants who tended to compare themselves to others more regularly had lower self-esteem, more negative emotions, and a poorer view of themselves after using Facebook than participants who did not tend to compare themselves to others. 
Consequently, when engaging with social media, it is critical to remind yourself that what you see is not an accurate picture of reality. Don’t compare yourself to the images of friends, colleagues, or celebrities. Remind yourself that it is just a snapshot of their life—and one that they want you to see.
–> YOU CAN GET SOCIAL MEDIA SERIOUSLY HARMS YOUR MENTAL HEALTH PHONE CASE HERE <–
Every purchase supports The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention the nation’s largest non-profit dedicated to saving lives and bringing hope to those affected by suicide.

Fake life for “like’s” of people, which you will not meet =) And this is our future? Thank’s, but I don’t want to be a part of this madness. Who’s with me?

My brother never had a social media account ever in his life, not Facebook or Instagram and he is only 23 years old. his life is worry free and he only does things for himself not to impress others, He is living a happy life I am working on being like him

I really love this message. It’s proven that social media increases depression and loneliness. Just live your life and stop worrying about others to compare yourself, you will never be happy this way. 


I really don’t get why people feel the need to lie about their lives to people they’ll never meet. Just be fuckin honest🙄

So I’ve been wanting this case for a week and I get to show off my new white xr while also sharing an important message about social media being harmful to your mental health. I like this case a lot and more people need to realize the harm of social media.

Question: Does Social Media Seriously Harms Your Mental Health?Answer: Yesssss!! I could go on and on about this.Social media as a whole, particularly Instagram, a place where people Look extremely High Fashioned but really Under Paid.Where self-worthy is based on how many likes, views and comments our posts gets. It’s B.S if you ask me:/ Seen friends who care more bout portraying an image and worry more about Trivial things( there’s more to life🤷🏻‍♂️). As soon as you open your social medias you will see something that will makes you think you’re being left behind. Being materialistic stuff or body image, anything really.Society teaches us that if our instagram posts don’t have a certain number of likes or views, our posts are not accepted of instagram quality posting given by society’s expectations and standards.On the flip side on the coin, social media is a really funny ass place, like you could LMAO day literally.POINT IS YOU DONT NEED SOCIAL APPROVAL TO KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH. YOU ARE LEGIT AWESOME! *USE SOCIAL MEDIA WISELY*

pinky–heart: lacinari: himynameisizzy: ressila: z-yess: ireallyenjoymyselfeveryday: grunge-aesthetic-lover: Over 75% of people lie on...

Alive, Apparently, and Bad: ORihad Herrma M S youmakemelikecharity: rock-moms: vastderp: gaybuttfuckzone: deltasniper1000: So someone in a group asked me to tell them why I hate the ocean sunfish so much, and apparently it was ~too mean~ and was deleted. To perpetuate the truth and stand up for ethical journalism, I’m posting it here. [Rated NC-17 for language.] Disclaimer, I care about marine life more than I care about anything else, for real. Except this big dumb idiot. And it’s not like an ~ironic~ thing, I mean it IS hilarious to me and they ARE THE BIGGEST JOKE PLAYED ON EARTH but I seriously fucking hate them. THE MOLA MOLA FISH (OR OCEAN SUNFISH) They are the world’s largest boney fish, weighing up to 5,000 pounds. And since they have very little girth, that just makes them these absolutely giant fucking dinner plates that God must have accidentally dropped while washing dishes one day and shrugged his shoulders at because no one could have imagined this would happen. AND WITH NO PURPOSE. EVERY POUND OF THAT IS A WASTED POUND AND EVERY FOOT OF IT (10 FT BY 14 FT) IS WASTED SPACE. They are so completely useless that scientists even debate about how they move. They have little control other than some minor wiggling. Some say they must just push water out of their mouths for direction (?????). They COULD use their back fin EXCEPT GUESS WHAT IT DOESNT FUCKING GROW. It just continually folds in on itself, so the freaking cells are being made, this piece of floating garbage just doesn’t put them where they need to fucking go. So they don’t have swim bladders. You know, the one thing that every fish has to make sure it doesn’t just sink to the bottom of the ocean when they stop moving and can stay the right side up. This creature. That can barely move to begin with. Can never stop its continuous tour of idiocy across the ocean or it’ll fucking sink. EXCEPT. EXCEPT. When they get stuck on top of the water! Which happens frequently! Because without the whole swim bladder thing, if the ocean pushes over THE THINNEST BUT LARGEST MOST TOPPLE-ABLE FISH ON THE PLANET, shit outta luck! There is no creature on this earth that needs a swim bladder more than this spit in the face of nature, AND YET. Some scientists have speculated that when they do that, they are absorbing energy from the sun because no one fucking knows how they manage to get any real energy to begin with. So they need the sun I guess. But good news, when they end up stuck like that, it gives birds a chance to land on their goddamn island of a body and eat the bugs and parasites out of its skin because it’s basically a slowly migrating cesspool. Pros and cons. “If they are so huge, they must at least be decent predators.” No. No. The most dangerous thing about them is, as you may have guessed, their stupidity. They have caused the death of one person before. Because it jumped onto a boat. On a human. And in 2005 it decided to relive its mighty glory days and do it again, this time landing on a four-year-old boy. Luckily Byron sustained no injuries. Way to go, fish. Great job. They mostly only eat jellyfish because of course they do, they could only eat something that has no brain and a possibility of drifting into their mouths I guess. Everything they do eat has almost zero nutritional value and because it’s so stupidly fucking big, it has to eat a ton of the almost no nutritional value stuff to stay alive. Dumb. See that ridiculous open mouth? (This is actually why this is my favorite picture of one, and I have had it saved to my phone for three years) “Oh no! What could have happened! How could this be!” Do not let that expression fool you, they just don’t have the goddamn ability to close their mouths because their teeth are fused together, and ya know what, it is good it floats around with such a clueless expression on its face, because it is in fact clueless as all fuck. They do SOMETIMES get eaten though. BUT HARDLY. No animal truly uses them as a food source, but instead (which has lead us to said photo) will usually just maim the fuck out of them for kicks. Seals have been seen playing with their fins like frisbees. Probably the most useful thing to ever come from them. “Wow, you raise some good points here, this fish truly is proof that God has abandoned us.” Yes, thank you. “But if they’re so bad at literally everything, why haven’t they gone extinct.” Great question. BECAUSE THIS THING IS SO WORTHLESS IT DOESNT REALIZE IT SHOULD NOT EXIST. IT IS SO UNAWARE OF LITERALLY FUCKING EVERYTHING THAT IT DOESNT REALIZE THAT IT’S DOING MAYBE THE WORST FUCKING JOB OF BEING A FISH, OR DEBATABLY THE WORST JOB OF BEING A CLUSTER OF CELLS THAN ANY OTHER CLUSTER OF CELLS. SO WHAT DOES IT DO? IT LAYS THE MOST EGGS OUT OF EVERYTHING. Besides some bugs, there are some ants and stuff that’ll lay more. IT WILL LAY 300 MILLION EGGS AT ONE TIME. 300,000,000. IT SURVIVES BECAUSE IT WOULD BE STATISTICALLY IMPROBABLE, DARE I SAY IMPOSSIBLE, THAT THERE WOULDNT BE AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE 300,000,000 (that is EACH time they lay eggs) LEFT SURVIVING AT THE END OF THE DAY. And this concludes why I hate the fuck out of this complete failure of evolution, the Ocean Sunfish. If I ever see one, I will throw rocks at it. LIVE OCEAN SUNFISH UPDATE: FISH DISCOVERED TO BE MORE DUMB THAN PREVIOUSLY THOUGHTSo the top and bottom fins kind of wiggle all of the time and they are not sure exactly why but think it’s stabilization. BUT they can jump by turning on their side and using them as wing type things. It is suspected they do this as a way of “scratching” their parasite ridden bodies. So learning that I was like “huh okay they have a skill.” Then I discovered this: Since they are so terrible at swimming, the current will carry them into deep cold water. Then they die. So I have learned that they are so stupid they just get slowly consumed by a freezing death. All while they have the full ability for that to not happen. Because they’re fucking worthless floating garbage i read this out loud to my marine bio nerd friend and she agrees be nice to them they’re doing their best :(
Alive, Apparently, and Bad: ORihad Herrma M
 S
youmakemelikecharity:

rock-moms:

vastderp:

gaybuttfuckzone:

deltasniper1000:

So someone in a group asked me to tell them why I hate the ocean sunfish so much, and apparently it was ~too mean~ and was deleted. To perpetuate the truth and stand up for ethical journalism, I’m posting it here. [Rated NC-17 for language.]

Disclaimer, I care about marine life more than I care about anything else, for real. Except this big dumb idiot. And it’s not like an ~ironic~ thing, I mean it IS hilarious to me and they ARE THE BIGGEST JOKE PLAYED ON EARTH but I seriously fucking hate them.

THE MOLA MOLA FISH (OR OCEAN SUNFISH)

They are the world’s largest boney fish, weighing up to 5,000 pounds. And since they have very little girth, that just makes them these absolutely giant fucking dinner plates that God must have accidentally dropped while washing dishes one day and shrugged his shoulders at because no one could have imagined this would happen. AND WITH NO PURPOSE. EVERY POUND OF THAT IS A WASTED POUND AND EVERY FOOT OF IT (10 FT BY 14 FT) IS WASTED SPACE.

They are so completely useless that scientists even debate about how they move. They have little control other than some minor wiggling. Some say they must just push water out of their mouths for direction (?????). They COULD use their back fin EXCEPT GUESS WHAT IT DOESNT FUCKING GROW. It just continually folds in on itself, so the freaking cells are being made, this piece of floating garbage just doesn’t put them where they need to fucking go. 

So they don’t have swim bladders. You know, the one thing that every fish has to make sure it doesn’t just sink to the bottom of the ocean when they stop moving and can stay the right side up. This creature. That can barely move to begin with. Can never stop its continuous tour of idiocy across the ocean or it’ll fucking sink. EXCEPT. EXCEPT. When they get stuck on top of the water! Which happens frequently! Because without the whole swim bladder thing, if the ocean pushes over THE THINNEST BUT LARGEST MOST TOPPLE-ABLE FISH ON THE PLANET, shit outta luck! There is no creature on this earth that needs a swim bladder more than this spit in the face of nature, AND YET. Some scientists have speculated that when they do that, they are absorbing energy from the sun because no one fucking knows how they manage to get any real energy to begin with. So they need the sun I guess. But good news, when they end up stuck like that, it gives birds a chance to land on their goddamn island of a body and eat the bugs and parasites out of its skin because it’s basically a slowly migrating cesspool. Pros and cons. 

“If they are so huge, they must at least be decent predators.” No. No. The most dangerous thing about them is, as you may have guessed, their stupidity. They have caused the death of one person before. Because it jumped onto a boat. On a human. And in 2005 it decided to relive its mighty glory days and do it again, this time landing on a four-year-old boy. Luckily Byron sustained no injuries. Way to go, fish. Great job.

They mostly only eat jellyfish because of course they do, they could only eat something that has no brain and a possibility of drifting into their mouths I guess. Everything they do eat has almost zero nutritional value and because it’s so stupidly fucking big, it has to eat a ton of the almost no nutritional value stuff to stay alive. Dumb. See that ridiculous open mouth? (This is actually why this is my favorite picture of one, and I have had it saved to my phone for three years) “Oh no! What could have happened! How could this be!” Do not let that expression fool you, they just don’t have the goddamn ability to close their mouths because their teeth are fused together, and ya know what, it is good it floats around with such a clueless expression on its face, because it is in fact clueless as all fuck.

They do SOMETIMES get eaten though. BUT HARDLY. No animal truly uses them as a food source, but instead (which has lead us to said photo) will usually just maim the fuck out of them for kicks. Seals have been seen playing with their fins like frisbees. Probably the most useful thing to ever come from them. 

“Wow, you raise some good points here, this fish truly is proof that God has abandoned us.” Yes, thank you. “But if they’re so bad at literally everything, why haven’t they gone extinct.” Great question. 

BECAUSE THIS THING IS SO WORTHLESS IT DOESNT REALIZE IT SHOULD NOT EXIST. IT IS SO UNAWARE OF LITERALLY FUCKING EVERYTHING THAT IT DOESNT REALIZE THAT IT’S DOING MAYBE THE WORST FUCKING JOB OF BEING A FISH, OR DEBATABLY THE WORST JOB OF BEING A CLUSTER OF CELLS THAN ANY OTHER CLUSTER OF CELLS. SO WHAT DOES IT DO? IT LAYS THE MOST EGGS OUT OF EVERYTHING. Besides some bugs, there are some ants and stuff that’ll lay more. IT WILL LAY 300 MILLION EGGS AT ONE TIME. 300,000,000. IT SURVIVES BECAUSE IT WOULD BE STATISTICALLY IMPROBABLE, DARE I SAY IMPOSSIBLE, THAT THERE WOULDNT BE AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE 300,000,000 (that is EACH time they lay eggs) LEFT SURVIVING AT THE END OF THE DAY. 

And this concludes why I hate the fuck out of this complete failure of evolution, the Ocean Sunfish. If I ever see one, I will throw rocks at it.


LIVE OCEAN SUNFISH UPDATE: FISH DISCOVERED TO BE MORE DUMB THAN PREVIOUSLY THOUGHTSo
 the top and bottom fins kind of wiggle all of the time and they are not
 sure exactly why but think it’s stabilization. BUT they can jump by 
turning on their side and using them as 
wing type things. It is suspected they do this as a way of “scratching” 
their parasite ridden bodies. So learning that I was like “huh okay they
 have a skill.” Then I discovered this: Since they 
are so terrible at swimming, the current will carry them into deep cold 
water. Then they die. So I have learned that they are so stupid they 
just get slowly consumed by a freezing death. All while they have the 
full ability for that to not happen. Because they’re fucking worthless 
floating garbage



i read this out loud to my marine bio nerd friend and she agrees


be nice to them they’re doing their best :(

youmakemelikecharity: rock-moms: vastderp: gaybuttfuckzone: deltasniper1000: So someone in a group asked me to tell them why I hate the...

Advice, Books, and Dallas Cowboys: generalgrievousdatingsim im reading about cowboy phrases and sayings and like 95% of them are just solid life advice generalgrievousdatingsim Things a Cowboy Should Not Do Here are some words to live by according to cowboys. Some are really good advice and all are funny cowboy sayings. Don't squat with your spurs on. Don't let your yearnings get ahead of your earnings. Don't dig for water under the outhouse. Don't go in if you don't know the way out. Don't mess with something that ain't bothering you. Never drive black cattle in the dark. Never approacha bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction. Never miss a good chance to shut up. Never ask how stupid someone is 'cause they'll turn around and show you. like idk how accurate these are but somehow they manage to be both peak shitposting humor and genuinely helpful suggestions generalgrievousdatingsim If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging. It's better to keep your mouth shut and look stupid than open it and prove it. If it doesn't seem to be worth the effort it probably isn't. Just 'cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back. Nature gave us all something to fall back on, and sooner or later we all land flat on it. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket fuck self-help books and therapy, all i need to make it in life is my trusty Cowboy TipsTM ifunny.co Tap to see the meme
Advice, Books, and Dallas Cowboys: generalgrievousdatingsim
 im reading about cowboy phrases and
 sayings and like 95% of them are just solid
 life advice
 generalgrievousdatingsim
 Things a Cowboy Should Not Do
 Here are some words to live by according to cowboys. Some are really good advice and all are
 funny cowboy sayings.
 Don't squat with your spurs on.
 Don't let your yearnings get ahead of your earnings.
 Don't dig for water under the outhouse.
 Don't go in if you don't know the way out.
 Don't mess with something that ain't bothering you.
 Never drive black cattle in the dark.
 Never approacha bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.
 Never miss a good chance to shut up.
 Never ask how stupid someone is 'cause they'll turn around and show you.
 like idk how accurate these are but somehow
 they manage to be both peak shitposting
 humor and genuinely helpful suggestions
 generalgrievousdatingsim
 If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging.
 It's better to keep your mouth shut and look stupid than open it and prove it.
 If it doesn't seem to be worth the effort it probably isn't.
 Just 'cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down.
 Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back.
 Nature gave us all something to fall back on, and sooner or later we all land flat on it.
 The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket
 fuck self-help books and therapy, all i need
 to make it in life is my trusty Cowboy TipsTM
 ifunny.co
Tap to see the meme

Tap to see the meme

Advice, Books, and Dallas Cowboys: generalgrievousdatingsim im reading about cowboy phrases and sayings and like 95% of them are just solid life advice generalgrievousdatingsim Things a Cowboy Should Not Do Here are some words to live by according to cowboys. Some are really good advice and all are funny cowboy sayings. Don't squat with your spurs on. Don't let your yearnings get ahead of your earnings. Don't dig for water under the outhouse. Don't go in if you don't know the way out. Don't mess with something that ain't bothering you. Never drive black cattle in the dark. Never approacha bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction. Never miss a good chance to shut up. Never ask how stupid someone is 'cause they'll turn around and show you. like idk how accurate these are but somehow they manage to be both peak shitposting humor and genuinely helpful suggestions generalgrievousdatingsim If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging. It's better to keep your mouth shut and look stupid than open it and prove it. If it doesn't seem to be worth the effort it probably isn't. Just 'cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back. Nature gave us all something to fall back on, and sooner or later we all land flat on it. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket fuck self-help books and therapy, all i need to make it in life is my trusty Cowboy TipsTM ifunny.co Tap to see the meme
Advice, Books, and Dallas Cowboys: generalgrievousdatingsim
 im reading about cowboy phrases and
 sayings and like 95% of them are just solid
 life advice
 generalgrievousdatingsim
 Things a Cowboy Should Not Do
 Here are some words to live by according to cowboys. Some are really good advice and all are
 funny cowboy sayings.
 Don't squat with your spurs on.
 Don't let your yearnings get ahead of your earnings.
 Don't dig for water under the outhouse.
 Don't go in if you don't know the way out.
 Don't mess with something that ain't bothering you.
 Never drive black cattle in the dark.
 Never approacha bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.
 Never miss a good chance to shut up.
 Never ask how stupid someone is 'cause they'll turn around and show you.
 like idk how accurate these are but somehow
 they manage to be both peak shitposting
 humor and genuinely helpful suggestions
 generalgrievousdatingsim
 If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging.
 It's better to keep your mouth shut and look stupid than open it and prove it.
 If it doesn't seem to be worth the effort it probably isn't.
 Just 'cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down.
 Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back.
 Nature gave us all something to fall back on, and sooner or later we all land flat on it.
 The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket
 fuck self-help books and therapy, all i need
 to make it in life is my trusty Cowboy TipsTM
 ifunny.co
Tap to see the meme

Tap to see the meme

God, Jedi, and Life: Technically, he wasn't supposed to be outside the Temple at all, not without Obi-Wan's permission "Technically" is just another way of saying you are breaking the rules, Obi-Wan would say. Either you obey a rule, or you do not He was devoted to his Master, yet sometimes Obi-Wan's earnestness could really get in the way. Anakin didn't believe in breaking Jedi rules. He just wanted to find the spaces between them Anakin was well aware that his Master knew of these midnight jaunts. Obi-Wan was amazingly perceptive. He could sense a shift in emotion or thought faster than an eyeblink Thank the moon and stars that Obi-Wan also preferred not to hear about his midnight trips. As long as Anakin was discreet and didn't get into trouble, Obi-Wan would turn a blind eye Anakin didn't want to trouble Obi-Wan, but he couldn't help himself. As the night wore on and the Temple quieted, as the Jedi students turned off their glow rods and settled down for night meditation and sleep, Anakin just got restless. The lure of the streets called him. There were projects he had to complete, droids he was building or refining, parts to scavenge, rusty treasures to uncover. But mostly he just needed to be outside, under the stars Only those of us who have been slaves can he sometimes thought. really taste freedom, gffa: Way of the Apprentice | by Jude WatsonI GIVE ANAKIN A LOT OF SHIT, BUT I REALLY LIKE THIS MOMENT A LOT.  I love that he feels a restlessness that the other Jedi don’t, because they grew up in a safe, secure, supportive environment, and Obi-Wan gets that Anakin isn’t quite the same and needs to run around a bit more.  It’s just FEELINGS ALL OVER THE PLACE FOR BOTH OF THEM.And I love that it shows the balance Obi-Wan is striking with Anakin–”either you obey a rule or you do not” is cutting through to the spirit of things, but that’s not necessarily a judgement thing.  Obi-Wan himself is “breaking the rules” by turning a blind eye to Anakin going out at night, because it’s for the good.  It fits so much with how it’s not about the letter of the law but about the spirit and intention of what you’re doing, the motivation behind it, the why of it, the bigger context of it.  That’s why it’s important to put in that Obi-Wan could sense the shift of an emotion in the blink of an eye, why it’s tied into the same context of Obi-Wan turning a blind eye when Anakin genuinely does need to get out and move.And I love that Anakin recognizes this part about himself.  He spends so much of his life not really understanding himself or what he really needs, that this moment of something that actually seems to help, along with how heartbreaking it is that he has to experience this feeling at all, just makes me allp.s. “Obi-Wan was amazingly perceptive.  He could sense the shift in emotion or thought faster than an eyeblink.” oh my god Anakin sounds EXACTLY LIKE ME when I talk about Obi-Wan, “He’s the greatest person who ever lived, he’s the smartest person who ever lived, THERE IS NO ONE BETTER.”SAME, ANAKIN.  SAME.  RIGHT DOWN TO I AM MAKING THE SAME EXACT FACE WHILE READING THIS BOOK.
God, Jedi, and Life: Technically, he wasn't supposed to be outside the Temple at all,
 not without Obi-Wan's permission
 "Technically" is just another way of saying you are breaking the
 rules, Obi-Wan would say. Either you obey a rule, or you do not
 He was devoted to his Master, yet sometimes Obi-Wan's
 earnestness could really get in the way. Anakin didn't believe in
 breaking Jedi rules. He just wanted to find the spaces between
 them
 Anakin was well aware that his Master knew of these
 midnight jaunts. Obi-Wan was amazingly perceptive. He could
 sense a shift in emotion or
 thought faster than an eyeblink
 Thank the moon and stars that Obi-Wan also preferred not to
 hear about his midnight trips. As long as Anakin was discreet
 and didn't get into trouble, Obi-Wan would turn a blind eye
 Anakin didn't want to trouble Obi-Wan, but he couldn't help
 himself. As the night wore on and the Temple quieted, as the
 Jedi students turned off their glow rods and settled down for
 night meditation and sleep, Anakin just got restless. The lure of
 the streets called him. There were projects he had to complete,
 droids he was building or refining, parts to scavenge, rusty
 treasures to uncover. But mostly he just needed to be outside,
 under the stars
 Only those of us who have been slaves can
 he sometimes thought.
 really taste freedom,
gffa:



Way of the Apprentice | by Jude WatsonI GIVE ANAKIN A LOT OF SHIT, BUT I REALLY LIKE THIS MOMENT A LOT.  I love that he feels a restlessness that the other Jedi don’t, because they grew up in a safe, secure, supportive environment, and Obi-Wan gets that Anakin isn’t quite the same and needs to run around a bit more.  It’s just FEELINGS ALL OVER THE PLACE FOR BOTH OF THEM.And I love that it shows the balance Obi-Wan is striking with Anakin–”either you obey a rule or you do not” is cutting through to the spirit of things, but that’s not necessarily a judgement thing.  Obi-Wan himself is “breaking the rules” by turning a blind eye to Anakin going out at night, because it’s for the good.  It fits so much with how it’s not about the letter of the law but about the spirit and intention of what you’re doing, the motivation behind it, the why of it, the bigger context of it.  That’s why it’s important to put in that Obi-Wan could sense the shift of an emotion in the blink of an eye, why it’s tied into the same context of Obi-Wan turning a blind eye when Anakin genuinely does need to get out and move.And I love that Anakin recognizes this part about himself.  He spends so much of his life not really understanding himself or what he really needs, that this moment of something that actually seems to help, along with how heartbreaking it is that he has to experience this feeling at all, just makes me allp.s. “Obi-Wan was amazingly perceptive.  He could sense the shift in emotion or thought faster than an eyeblink.” oh my god Anakin sounds EXACTLY LIKE ME when I talk about Obi-Wan, “He’s the greatest person who ever lived, he’s the smartest person who ever lived, THERE IS NO ONE BETTER.”SAME, ANAKIN.  SAME.  RIGHT DOWN TO I AM MAKING THE SAME EXACT FACE WHILE READING THIS BOOK.

gffa: Way of the Apprentice | by Jude WatsonI GIVE ANAKIN A LOT OF SHIT, BUT I REALLY LIKE THIS MOMENT A LOT.  I love that he feels a res...