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Af, Bad, and Dude: 10 Reasons Why Your D*ck ls Trash @balleralert Read more: www.balleralert.com 10 Reasons Why Your D*ck Is Trash - blogged by @niksofly ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you let men tell it, all of them have magical golden penises that give out orgasms like free lunch. Every dude is well endowed and knows what they're doing, and if they're allowed to gas you, they all will tell you how nasty they are and how their skully (oral sex ) game is beasty. Somehow, women buy that wolf and soon realize the d*ck is wack AF. By that time, it's too late and an L has been bestowed upon her. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Word to the wise: dudes with a village of kids usually have good d*ck. Not to mention, if he doesn't say anything about his performance outside of "I know me and I'm good at what I do,” you about to get the most phenomenal d*ck of your life. Don't question me. Just accept the facts, lol. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Anyhoo, here are the top reasons the d*ck is wack AF. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 1. She is allergic to shellfish. That little shrimp is only tickling her labia. If she doesn't gasp when you put it in-It's wack. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 2. And if you have length, you're missing girth. Women don’t want to bust a vein trying to grip your pencil d*ck. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 3. You make too much noise. Yeah, she knows you are swimming in ecstasy, but right now she's drowning in your theatrics. It's bad enough your d*ck is small, but the noise is stopping her from concentrating on gripping your vienna and climaxing. The sh*t is hard work. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 4. Eating is not literal. Your pregame is horrid. You’re either eating vagina like a cat licking milk or you about to give her a total hysterectomy. There are nerves down there sir. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 5. Mentioning nerves. Stop trying to beat her walls down or rupture her cervix. She needs all components. That hurts like hell. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 6. And if you're a decent size, you are Thumper the Quick Pumper. She just slid on your manhood and it's over already. I'm pretty sure paint drying would be more gratifying. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 7. And let's not get into how boring you are in bed. It's the same two ......to read the rest log on to BallerAlert.com (clickable link on profile)
Af, Bad, and Dude: 10 Reasons Why Your D*ck ls Trash
 @balleralert
 Read more: www.balleralert.com
10 Reasons Why Your D*ck Is Trash - blogged by @niksofly ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you let men tell it, all of them have magical golden penises that give out orgasms like free lunch. Every dude is well endowed and knows what they're doing, and if they're allowed to gas you, they all will tell you how nasty they are and how their skully (oral sex ) game is beasty. Somehow, women buy that wolf and soon realize the d*ck is wack AF. By that time, it's too late and an L has been bestowed upon her. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Word to the wise: dudes with a village of kids usually have good d*ck. Not to mention, if he doesn't say anything about his performance outside of "I know me and I'm good at what I do,” you about to get the most phenomenal d*ck of your life. Don't question me. Just accept the facts, lol. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Anyhoo, here are the top reasons the d*ck is wack AF. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 1. She is allergic to shellfish. That little shrimp is only tickling her labia. If she doesn't gasp when you put it in-It's wack. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 2. And if you have length, you're missing girth. Women don’t want to bust a vein trying to grip your pencil d*ck. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 3. You make too much noise. Yeah, she knows you are swimming in ecstasy, but right now she's drowning in your theatrics. It's bad enough your d*ck is small, but the noise is stopping her from concentrating on gripping your vienna and climaxing. The sh*t is hard work. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 4. Eating is not literal. Your pregame is horrid. You’re either eating vagina like a cat licking milk or you about to give her a total hysterectomy. There are nerves down there sir. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 5. Mentioning nerves. Stop trying to beat her walls down or rupture her cervix. She needs all components. That hurts like hell. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 6. And if you're a decent size, you are Thumper the Quick Pumper. She just slid on your manhood and it's over already. I'm pretty sure paint drying would be more gratifying. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 7. And let's not get into how boring you are in bed. It's the same two ......to read the rest log on to BallerAlert.com (clickable link on profile)

10 Reasons Why Your D*ck Is Trash - blogged by @niksofly ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you let men tell it, all of them have magical golden penises tha...

Facts, Football, and Friends: u/Aroundall 6d i.redd.it Hero dog recovering from rattlesnake bites after saving girl, grandma @DrSmashlove My lil homegirl text me after I posted about stealing-appropriating garments from exes: “I own some amazing hoodies goin’ back bout 14 yrs 😍🤣. The ultimate was when I was at an ex’s a couple years ago (we were still great friends). I had lived with him. He opens the door and he’s wearing my (prior to him) ex’s football (with lettering) hoodie I had accidentally left behind. 🤣🤣🤣. Disturbing 🤣”. Men. Imma have to address this with y’all because y’all deserve to know. Listen close. If u ever find a man’s garment at yo girl’s crib. And u rock that sh!t like sh!t’s sweet. Just like “oh HELL yeah! A Wisconsin Football sweatshirt! XL too? My size! ☺️” And u let that garment touch yo skin. And that garment belonged to a man who used to lay pipe to yo girl. And now his sweatshirt that he use to sweat in and she ain’t wash it for six months after she stole it because she missed his manly, lightly stinky Old Spicey sexual scent? And now his scented sweatshirt is ensconcing yo upper body bruv? U and that Man? Y’all have touched PPs now 🤗. Sorry but this is facts, y’all PPs has touched 👬. Like y’all ain’t necessarily get oiled up and rub them together aggressively (question: can men ‘scissor’, bruv? Someone who knows about this please chime in 🤓). But y’all PPs has touched metaphysically. Just a light touch. A celestial sword-crossing of sorts, if u will. Like if anyone ever ask u, “Ted, are you attracted to men?” U gotta keep it 600: “Nah I mean that’s not really my thing LOL I like women ONLY haha but I mean there was one time where I touched peckers with a man. It’s a long story. I’d rather not get into it. But it happened and whatever, it’s who I am.” It’s no going back now bruv. It’s part of the fabric of who u are. Embrace it. Or simply be careful about enrobing yourself in the garments of strange men y’all be safe now 🤗😂😂😂
Facts, Football, and Friends: u/Aroundall 6d i.redd.it
 Hero dog recovering from rattlesnake
 bites after saving girl, grandma
 @DrSmashlove
My lil homegirl text me after I posted about stealing-appropriating garments from exes: “I own some amazing hoodies goin’ back bout 14 yrs 😍🤣. The ultimate was when I was at an ex’s a couple years ago (we were still great friends). I had lived with him. He opens the door and he’s wearing my (prior to him) ex’s football (with lettering) hoodie I had accidentally left behind. 🤣🤣🤣. Disturbing 🤣”. Men. Imma have to address this with y’all because y’all deserve to know. Listen close. If u ever find a man’s garment at yo girl’s crib. And u rock that sh!t like sh!t’s sweet. Just like “oh HELL yeah! A Wisconsin Football sweatshirt! XL too? My size! ☺️” And u let that garment touch yo skin. And that garment belonged to a man who used to lay pipe to yo girl. And now his sweatshirt that he use to sweat in and she ain’t wash it for six months after she stole it because she missed his manly, lightly stinky Old Spicey sexual scent? And now his scented sweatshirt is ensconcing yo upper body bruv? U and that Man? Y’all have touched PPs now 🤗. Sorry but this is facts, y’all PPs has touched 👬. Like y’all ain’t necessarily get oiled up and rub them together aggressively (question: can men ‘scissor’, bruv? Someone who knows about this please chime in 🤓). But y’all PPs has touched metaphysically. Just a light touch. A celestial sword-crossing of sorts, if u will. Like if anyone ever ask u, “Ted, are you attracted to men?” U gotta keep it 600: “Nah I mean that’s not really my thing LOL I like women ONLY haha but I mean there was one time where I touched peckers with a man. It’s a long story. I’d rather not get into it. But it happened and whatever, it’s who I am.” It’s no going back now bruv. It’s part of the fabric of who u are. Embrace it. Or simply be careful about enrobing yourself in the garments of strange men y’all be safe now 🤗😂😂😂

My lil homegirl text me after I posted about stealing-appropriating garments from exes: “I own some amazing hoodies goin’ back bout 14 yrs 😍...

England, Memes, and New York: Letter From Titanic Passenger Sold For $166,000 at Auction @balleralert On board R.M S'TITANIC e2てぇ 3 Letter From Titanic Passenger Sold For $166,000 at Auction -by: @RaquelHarrisTV ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A letter written just one day before the Titanic sank has been sold for $166,000 at auction. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The letter was recovered from a passenger's body, and is believed to be one of the last letters written before the ship hit the iceberg and sank into the Atlantic. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Surpassing expectations, the British auction house Henry Aldridge & Son predicted the item would go for £60,000 to £80,000 ($79,000 to $106,000). The winner of Saturday's auction name wasn't released. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The author of the letter was an American salesman named Alexander Oskar Holverson, he wrote the letter to his mother. Sadly, the letter shared Holverson's hopes to reach his destination: "If all goes well we will arrive in New York Wednesday A.M." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What makes this letter so special is it was written on April 13, 1912, one day before the ship sank midway through its voyage from Southampton, England to New York. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Holverson describes the world's largest built ship inside the letter. "This boat is giant in size and fitted up like a palacial hotel," wrote Holverson. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Holverson died when the Titanic went down along with 1,500 other passengers and crew. About 700 people survived including Holverson's wife, Mary. Holverson's body and other belongings were found days later in the Atlantic.
England, Memes, and New York: Letter From Titanic Passenger
 Sold For $166,000 at Auction
 @balleralert
 On board R.M S'TITANIC
 e2てぇ
 3
Letter From Titanic Passenger Sold For $166,000 at Auction -by: @RaquelHarrisTV ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A letter written just one day before the Titanic sank has been sold for $166,000 at auction. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The letter was recovered from a passenger's body, and is believed to be one of the last letters written before the ship hit the iceberg and sank into the Atlantic. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Surpassing expectations, the British auction house Henry Aldridge & Son predicted the item would go for £60,000 to £80,000 ($79,000 to $106,000). The winner of Saturday's auction name wasn't released. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The author of the letter was an American salesman named Alexander Oskar Holverson, he wrote the letter to his mother. Sadly, the letter shared Holverson's hopes to reach his destination: "If all goes well we will arrive in New York Wednesday A.M." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What makes this letter so special is it was written on April 13, 1912, one day before the ship sank midway through its voyage from Southampton, England to New York. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Holverson describes the world's largest built ship inside the letter. "This boat is giant in size and fitted up like a palacial hotel," wrote Holverson. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Holverson died when the Titanic went down along with 1,500 other passengers and crew. About 700 people survived including Holverson's wife, Mary. Holverson's body and other belongings were found days later in the Atlantic.

Letter From Titanic Passenger Sold For $166,000 at Auction -by: @RaquelHarrisTV ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A letter written just one day before the...

Beer, Confused, and Drinking: a tripad...r.co.uk SHARE HOTOS REVIEWS If im honest the food is ok ' but only if u drink a couple of their flat pints first. l ordered the steak and i did get a tony piece with the lump of fat i got served I went to the bar to order a pint and never got served until i said 'please' i'm 28 years not 28 months Also my friends got ordered off of the table because the food was finished and they didnt have space for people only drinking when they needed the tables for food. We were ordered to stand at the bar only to be told we were clogging the place up and then told to leave. Im laughing typing this as i am so confused as to how the place was so busy with such terrible, angry staff I asked to speak to the manager who spoke and looked like she lived under a bridge Worst bar in Glasgow. But a cracking bit if u order the steak ul get a cracking bit of fat for the dug when u get home Helpful? 70 trípad..r.co.uk SHARE PHOTOS REVIEWS NEARBY Public Relations Manager at responded to this review Having spoken to our staff and watched CCTV we remember the day well Let's start with the "flat pints", our beer selection is pulled through the taps each morning and checked that it is "tap kwality". On the day you mentioned, we had no other complaints about the beer being flat, in fact, we had compliments. Let's move onto the steak. The steak you were served is the same 6oz sirloin that we use on our main meal “Trash Steak" which is one of our top sellers in The ratio of fat to meat is in favour of the meat and when you say "tony" we assume you mean "tiny". Size is a subjective thing and it is encouraging that you think something of a decent a tripad...r.co.uk SHARE PHOTOS REVIEWS NEARBY that you think something of a decent size points more towards the smaller end of the scale. Furthermore, on the day, your party advised that the food was good and you enjoyed it. Your next point regarding saying the word "please" is an interesting one. It's disappointing that you don't feel you need to be polite when requesting something. If you speak to most people, if not all in hospitality, then indeed the customer service industry, you will find that everyone likes to hear the words please" and "thank you". It's this revolutionary thing called manners and has been around for quite some time You should try it With regards to being ordered off the table, Steak Wednesday is one of our busiest days of the week and we have a very large turn over. We therefore want to make sure as many customers get to a tripad...r.co.uk SHARE HOTOS REVIEWS to make sure as many customers get to experience it as possible!Up until 9pm we like to allocate tables for food first and foremost so that people can enjoy their meal and we have the bar area available for drinkers. To recount what happened, you were not ordered to stand at the bar. It was explained that the table was needed for other customers after you had been dining on it for around 2 hours whichi what we feel it ample time to enjoy a meal. Whilst standing at the bar people in your party started to swear and make inappropriate comments about our staff It was also overheard that one of your party threatened violence towards our duty manager. Whilst we understand that there might be the odd comment from customers if something isn't up to scratch or something has affected service, this is not behaviour we will tolerate. Our staff are NOT here to be threatened or abused. They are here to tolerate. Our staff are NOT here to be threatened or abused. They are here to serve you, be spoken to politely and offer a good service As for you comment on our staff member's appearance Paddy, anyone seeing your comment or reading your review will be able to tell more about you as a person than our manager. Take care A long(ish) but satisfying read. When restaurants call out shitty customers.
Beer, Confused, and Drinking: a tripad...r.co.uk
 SHARE
 HOTOS
 REVIEWS
 If im honest the food is ok ' but only if u
 drink a couple of their flat pints first.
 l ordered the steak and i did get a tony
 piece with the lump of fat i got served
 I went to the bar to order a pint and never
 got served until i said 'please' i'm 28 years
 not 28 months
 Also my friends got ordered off of the table
 because the food was finished and they
 didnt have space for people only drinking
 when they needed the tables for food. We
 were ordered to stand at the bar only to be
 told we were clogging the place up and
 then told to leave. Im laughing typing this
 as i am so confused as to how the place
 was so busy with such terrible, angry staff
 I asked to speak to the manager who
 spoke and looked like she lived under a
 bridge
 Worst bar in Glasgow. But a cracking bit if u
 order the steak ul get a cracking bit of fat
 for the dug when u get home
 Helpful? 70

 trípad..r.co.uk
 SHARE
 PHOTOS
 REVIEWS
 NEARBY
 Public Relations Manager at
 responded to this review
 Having spoken to our staff and watched
 CCTV we remember the day well
 Let's start with the "flat pints", our beer
 selection is pulled through the taps each
 morning and checked that it is "tap
 kwality". On the day you mentioned, we
 had no other complaints about the beer
 being flat, in fact, we had compliments.
 Let's move onto the steak. The steak
 you were served is the same 6oz sirloin
 that we use on our main meal “Trash
 Steak" which is one of our top sellers in
 The ratio of fat to meat is in favour
 of the meat and when you say "tony" we
 assume you mean "tiny". Size is a
 subjective thing and it is encouraging
 that you think something of a decent

 a tripad...r.co.uk
 SHARE
 PHOTOS
 REVIEWS
 NEARBY
 that you think something of a decent
 size points more towards the smaller
 end of the scale. Furthermore, on the
 day, your party advised that the food
 was good and you enjoyed it.
 Your next point regarding saying the
 word "please" is an interesting one. It's
 disappointing that you don't feel you
 need to be polite when requesting
 something. If you speak to most people,
 if not all in hospitality, then indeed the
 customer service industry, you will find
 that everyone likes to hear the words
 please" and "thank you". It's this
 revolutionary thing called manners and
 has been around for quite some time
 You should try it
 With regards to being ordered off the
 table, Steak Wednesday is one of our
 busiest days of the week and we have a
 very large turn over. We therefore want
 to make sure as many customers get to

 a tripad...r.co.uk
 SHARE
 HOTOS
 REVIEWS
 to make sure as many customers get to
 experience it as possible!Up until 9pm
 we like to allocate tables for food first
 and foremost so that people can enjoy
 their meal and we have the bar area
 available for drinkers.
 To recount what happened, you were
 not ordered to stand at the bar. It was
 explained that the table was needed for
 other customers after you had been
 dining on it for around 2 hours whichi
 what we feel it ample time to enjoy a
 meal. Whilst standing at the bar people
 in your party started to swear and make
 inappropriate comments about our staff
 It was also overheard that one of your
 party threatened violence towards our
 duty manager. Whilst we understand
 that there might be the odd comment
 from customers if something isn't up to
 scratch or something has affected
 service, this is not behaviour we will
 tolerate. Our staff are NOT here to be
 threatened or abused. They are here to

 tolerate. Our staff are NOT here to be
 threatened or abused. They are here to
 serve you, be spoken to politely and
 offer a good service
 As for you comment on our staff
 member's appearance Paddy, anyone
 seeing your comment or reading your
 review will be able to tell more about
 you as a person than our manager.
 Take care
A long(ish) but satisfying read. When restaurants call out shitty customers.

A long(ish) but satisfying read. When restaurants call out shitty customers.