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Fucking, Life, and School: DONNY CATES. @Doncates , Dec 11 I promise you dont really want to read a book where Eddie is doing fine and everything is awesome and everyone is happy. That book is boring and you will not like that book Or maybe you would. I dunno. I'm not writing that book symbisexual-disaster:*glances wearily at my 5,000 bookmarked fics in which everything is awesome and everyone is happy*  Honestly this just shows what a shallow understanding of story writing he has and I don’t know how he got to become a writer as a result of this.Conflict makes a story interesting but it’s pretty clear that a) he only has 1 idea of conflict (tragedy) and b) he sees no room for character growth (because anything other than tragedy is considered boring and irrelevant and therefore we never see characters put into different situations and he doesn’t have to write them react to anything other than tragedy).Showing Eddie and Venom doing well doesn’t even have to be the whole series (honestly I’d find that pretty boring too after several issues as much as I want to see Eddie and Venom grocery shopping or going to the farmer’s market). The point of doing so is a) character development and b) a break in the storyline from any current conflict. As much as peace/ trivial aspects of Eddie’s life will get boring after several issues, so will conflict. I’m really tired of seeing overblown issues left right and centre and absolutely no pause given to Eddie’s development (not to mention he’s regressing because of shitty writing).That one scene where Eddie’s speaking to V but seemingly himself when he’s eating noodles and V’s asking for a bloody steak? That’s the kind of shit I’m talking about. It’s literally 2 pages of Eddie speaking to himself, being very kind to V, then snapping back at a stranger who’s weirded out by him and he and V then proceed to have a conversation about innocence and stupidity. Not only does this show Eddie’s a dick in day-to-day life which contrasts with his ideas of being a good person and saving the innocent, it also shows V’s basic (but forming) ideas about human characteristics and personalities and Eddie has to do his best to help V understand innocent =/= stupid. That’s all it fucking took! 2 pages of a regular conversation between Eddie and V! Then you can get back to whatever conflict is happening!Donny Cates never graduated from the school of ‘I like these characters and I’m going to make them suffer’ and it shows.
Fucking, Life, and School: DONNY CATES. @Doncates , Dec 11
 I promise you dont really want to read a book where Eddie is doing fine and
 everything is awesome and everyone is happy. That book is boring and you will
 not like that book
 Or maybe you would. I dunno.
 I'm not writing that book
symbisexual-disaster:*glances wearily at my 5,000 bookmarked fics in which everything is awesome and everyone is happy* 
Honestly this just shows what a shallow understanding of story writing he has and I don’t know how he got to become a writer as a result of this.Conflict makes a story interesting but it’s pretty clear that a) he only has 1 idea of conflict (tragedy) and b) he sees no room for character growth (because anything other than tragedy is considered boring and irrelevant and therefore we never see characters put into different situations and he doesn’t have to write them react to anything other than tragedy).Showing Eddie and Venom doing well doesn’t even have to be the whole series (honestly I’d find that pretty boring too after several issues as much as I want to see Eddie and Venom grocery shopping or going to the farmer’s market). The point of doing so is a) character development and b) a break in the storyline from any current conflict. As much as peace/ trivial aspects of Eddie’s life will get boring after several issues, so will conflict. I’m really tired of seeing overblown issues left right and centre and absolutely no pause given to Eddie’s development (not to mention he’s regressing because of shitty writing).That one scene where Eddie’s speaking to V but seemingly himself when he’s eating noodles and V’s asking for a bloody steak? That’s the kind of shit I’m talking about. It’s literally 2 pages of Eddie speaking to himself, being very kind to V, then snapping back at a stranger who’s weirded out by him and he and V then proceed to have a conversation about innocence and stupidity. Not only does this show Eddie’s a dick in day-to-day life which contrasts with his ideas of being a good person and saving the innocent, it also shows V’s basic (but forming) ideas about human characteristics and personalities and Eddie has to do his best to help V understand innocent =/= stupid. That’s all it fucking took! 2 pages of a regular conversation between Eddie and V! Then you can get back to whatever conflict is happening!Donny Cates never graduated from the school of ‘I like these characters and I’m going to make them suffer’ and it shows.

symbisexual-disaster:*glances wearily at my 5,000 bookmarked fics in which everything is awesome and everyone is happy*  Honestly this just ...

Future, God, and Tumblr: SO YOu KNOW YOu'RE IN A COMIC BOOK. COMIC BOOK, EVEN AND YOU THINK THAT GIVES YOu SPECIAL PROTECTI N. WHAT? BECAUSE YOU'RE POPULAR? WELL,TVE NEVER HEARD OF YOu. YOuR NAME IS GWEN? GuARANTEE ANYONE WHO DOESN'T READ THIS THINKS YOU'RE GWEN STACY. WA DO YOu KNOW WHO'S HEARD OF MEP вин! EVERYONE. エHAVE HAD HUNDREDS F issuES. DON'T KNOW HOW MANY SERIES. GUEST- APPEAR EVERYWHERE, COMICS VIDEO GAMES. TV SHOWS. AND SO MUCH MERCHANDISE AND NEVER FORGET.. THE HIGHEST- GROSSING R-RATED FILM OF ALL TIME FIRST APPEARED AS A BACKUP IN HOWARD THE DUCK. YOU HOWEVER.. BECAUSE THEY WEREN'T SURE IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE You OH GOD, YOU'RE RIGHT. YOU ARE THE LAST PERSON WHO CAN KILL ME. ANYWAY... IT FEELS FITTING THAT AM THE HAND OF YOUR CANCELATION BYE-BYE, "GWEN" POOLE." IF You'RE SO POWERFUL... WAIT IF YOu KNOW ALL THIS... STUFF... THEN WHY ARE YOL TRAPPED BY ARCADE? WHY ARE YOU JUST PLAYING OUT THIS STORY? RIGHT LAST WORDS GO FOR IT BECAUSE... WE ALL JUST LIVE HERE. DON'T WE? chefpyro: This pause in the fight actually highlights an important difference between Deadpool and Gwenpool. They both acknowledge their existence as comic book characters and utilize their knowledge of the internal rules of their comic book world to their advantage, but Gwen is the only one of the two with the idea to rebel against the Powers That Be, where Deadpool is fine just playing out the story. This difference later on leads into Gwenpool’s rejection of her evil future self, when she knowingly erases her future heel turn so she won’t have to hurt her heroes as a villain. Cool stuff.
nsfw
Future, God, and Tumblr: SO YOu
 KNOW YOu'RE
 IN A COMIC
 BOOK.
 COMIC BOOK, EVEN
 AND YOU THINK THAT
 GIVES YOu SPECIAL
 PROTECTI N. WHAT?
 BECAUSE YOU'RE
 POPULAR?
 WELL,TVE
 NEVER HEARD
 OF YOu.
 YOuR NAME IS
 GWEN? GuARANTEE
 ANYONE WHO DOESN'T READ
 THIS THINKS YOU'RE
 GWEN STACY.
 WA
 DO YOu
 KNOW WHO'S HEARD
 OF MEP
 вин!
 EVERYONE.
 エHAVE
 HAD HUNDREDS F
 issuES. DON'T KNOW
 HOW MANY SERIES. GUEST-
 APPEAR EVERYWHERE, COMICS
 VIDEO GAMES. TV SHOWS.
 AND SO MUCH
 MERCHANDISE
 AND NEVER
 FORGET..
 THE
 HIGHEST-
 GROSSING
 R-RATED FILM
 OF ALL
 TIME
 FIRST
 APPEARED
 AS A BACKUP IN
 HOWARD THE
 DUCK.
 YOU
 HOWEVER..
 BECAUSE
 THEY WEREN'T
 SURE IF ANYONE
 WOULD LIKE
 You
 OH
 GOD, YOU'RE
 RIGHT.
 YOU ARE
 THE LAST
 PERSON WHO
 CAN KILL
 ME.
 ANYWAY...
 IT FEELS
 FITTING THAT AM THE
 HAND OF YOUR CANCELATION
 BYE-BYE, "GWEN"
 POOLE."

 IF You'RE SO
 POWERFUL...
 WAIT
 IF YOu
 KNOW ALL THIS...
 STUFF...
 THEN
 WHY ARE YOL
 TRAPPED BY ARCADE?
 WHY ARE YOU JUST
 PLAYING OUT THIS
 STORY?
 RIGHT
 LAST WORDS
 GO FOR IT
 BECAUSE...
 WE ALL
 JUST LIVE HERE.
 DON'T WE?
chefpyro:

This pause in the fight actually highlights an important difference between Deadpool and Gwenpool.
They both acknowledge their existence as comic book characters and utilize their knowledge of the internal rules of their comic book world to their advantage, but Gwen is the only one of the two with the idea to rebel against the Powers That Be, where Deadpool is fine just playing out the story.
This difference later on leads into Gwenpool’s rejection of her evil future self, when she knowingly erases her future heel turn so she won’t have to hurt her heroes as a villain.
Cool stuff.

chefpyro: This pause in the fight actually highlights an important difference between Deadpool and Gwenpool. They both acknowledge their ex...

Apparently, Candy, and Children: @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES OPENCILEDCELEBRITIES @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES IF YOU TELL ANYON RAY dykedottir: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: alwaysbewoke: jesussaysno: I don’t get the man one ? the entire series is focused on stopping all abuse the man here has his mouth covered up by a woman wearing a wedding ring. meaning he is being abused by his wife. of the men i’ve known and spoken to about being abused by their wives, one of the common ways wives will try to “make up” for the abuse is literally with money. fucking crazy sad shit but women who abuse their men (bf or husband) also believe us to be super materialistic and so they can just buy us. i could go on but i don’t want to. it’s too fucking gross.  this is clearly pedophila in the catholic church. a profoundly evil act that is is primarily aimed at little boys.  this is child molestation in the black community that tarted little black girls overwhelmingly. usually by a family member and usually a male family member with candy being used to buy their silence.  and this is an abused wife. the hand is male wearing a wedding ring. similar to the wife abusing the husband, an attempt to buy silence happens with flowers, candy and jewelry being the common gifts.   i respect that this artist (a woman i believe) covered such a wild range of abuse even the ones we don’t talk about.  I think that’s a dripping anatomical heart in the flower, too. :( Still don’t get the man one tbh. Is there an epidemic of rich women beating their husbands? I honestly don’t know. I am not familiar with the phenomenon, but knowing that male-on-female domestic violence vastly outweighs the reverse, I had to assume that it was included because otherwise she would have caught hell for it. I mean, apparently it does happen, so… Male violence against women and children is at actual epidemic levels. I know a few men who have suffered violence at the hands of female partners and it’s awful and unacceptable. But they were also all in a position to 1) leave and easily survive and/or 2) if they hit back would very much be able to stop the attack. As in if they hit back the woman would be ko’d. I’m not saying female on male violence is ok I’m saying it isn’t a ‘thing’ in the way the others are.  Agreed. Men have the means to leave abusive relationships much quicker than most abused women do (if ever). Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you
Apparently, Candy, and Children: @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES
 OPENCILEDCELEBRITIES
 @PENCILEDCELEBRITIES
 IF YOU TELL ANYON
 RAY
dykedottir:

layingdownsomebatfeets:

cumbler-tumbler:

layingdownsomebatfeets:

cumbler-tumbler:

alwaysbewoke:

jesussaysno:
I don’t get the man one ?
the entire series is focused on stopping all abuse
the man here has his mouth covered up by a woman wearing a wedding ring. meaning he is being abused by his wife. of the men i’ve known and spoken to about being abused by their wives, one of the common ways wives will try to “make up” for the abuse is literally with money. fucking crazy sad shit but women who abuse their men (bf or husband) also believe us to be super materialistic and so they can just buy us. i could go on but i don’t want to. it’s too fucking gross. 
this is clearly pedophila in the catholic church. a profoundly evil act that is is primarily aimed at little boys. 
this is child molestation in the black community that tarted little black girls overwhelmingly. usually by a family member and usually a male family member with candy being used to buy their silence. 
and this is an abused wife. the hand is male wearing a wedding ring. similar to the wife abusing the husband, an attempt to buy silence happens with flowers, candy and jewelry being the common gifts.  
i respect that this artist (a woman i believe) covered such a wild range of abuse even the ones we don’t talk about. 

I think that’s a dripping anatomical heart in the flower, too. :( 

Still don’t get the man one tbh. Is there an epidemic of rich women beating their husbands?

I honestly don’t know. I am not familiar with the phenomenon, but knowing that male-on-female domestic violence vastly outweighs the reverse, I had to assume that it was included because otherwise she would have caught hell for it. I mean, apparently it does happen, so… 

Male violence against women and children is at actual epidemic levels. I know a few men who have suffered violence at the hands of female partners and it’s awful and unacceptable. But they were also all in a position to 1) leave and easily survive and/or 2) if they hit back would very much be able to stop the attack. As in if they hit back the woman would be ko’d. I’m not saying female on male violence is ok I’m saying it isn’t a ‘thing’ in the way the others are. 


Agreed. Men have the means to leave abusive relationships much quicker than most abused women do (if ever). 

Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck youFuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

dykedottir: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: layingdownsomebatfeets: cumbler-tumbler: alwaysbewoke: jesussaysno: I don’t get t...

Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL MUN ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME FOR A SECURITY GUARD ㄧㄋ EEENH! SORRY, HANS, WRONG GUESS. Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE? CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE REALLY BAD FOR You THEN WHO ARE You? [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS] WHEWE JUST A FLY IN THE OINTMENT, HANS. ER PSHUU THE MONKEY KLIK TTER WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY? WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU WANT THE MOON? JUST SAY THE WORD AND I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND T AND PULL IT DOWN HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY. I'LL TAKE IT. THEN WHAT, GEORGE? SNIFE WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE. AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR... AM I TALKING TOO MUCH? YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER, INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH? HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi). All characters (c) Marvel Comics. Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno. No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.) There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older, and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time. alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!
Bad, Bad Boys, and Christmas: HELI'S KITCHEN MOVME CUB XMAS SPECIAL
 MUN
 ou ARE MOST ToUBLESOME
 FOR A SECURITY GUARD
 ㄧㄋ
 EEENH! SORRY, HANS,
 WRONG GUESS.
 Wouw You IKE TO ão FOR
 OUBLE JEOPARTY,WHERE THE
 SCORES CAN REALLY CHANGE?

 CWHOA, THESE THINGS ARE
 REALLY BAD FOR You
 THEN WHO ARE You?
 [INDIANA JONES THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
 WHEWE
 JUST A FLY IN THE
 OINTMENT, HANS.
 ER

 PSHUU
 THE MONKEY
 KLIK
 TTER
 WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, MARY?
 WHAT DO YOU WANT? DO YOU
 WANT THE MOON?

 JUST SAY THE WORD AND
 I'LL THROW A LASSO AROUND
 T AND PULL IT DOWN
 HEY. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD IDEA.
 I'LL GIVE YOU THE MOON, MARY.
 I'LL TAKE IT.
 THEN WHAT, GEORGE?
 SNIFE
 WELL, THEN YOU CAN SWALLOWIT
 AND IT'LL ALL DISSOLVE, SEE.
 AND THE MOONBEAMS WOULD SHOOT
 OUT OF YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR TOES
 AND THE ENDS OF YOUR HAIR...
 AM I TALKING TOO MUCH?
 YES! WHY DON'T YOU KISS HER,
 INSTEAD OF TALKING HER TO DEATH?
 HKMC is a work of satire by Dave Acosta (@davedrawsgood), Dee Cunniffe (@deezoid) & Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi).
 All characters (c) Marvel Comics.
 Next episode: Death Wish. Or maybe Predator. Dunno.
 No for real, The Thin Man is "clearly" the best Xmas movie. William Powell is a comedy genius. (If you like Nick & Nora, check out My Man
 Godfrey, another brillant Powell screwball that has the greatest and by greatest we mean most fucked-up- meetcute of all time.)
 There's a period in one's young adulthood where it's deeply uncool to like A Wonderful Life. Sentimentality! Ugh, gross. Then you get older,
 and messages of hope seem a lot more necessary than before. Also, Jimmy Stewart is funny as hell. Not just his delivery, but his physical
 business between lines? #Goals. Stewart has been in a lot of great films Capra's so current it hurt Mr Smith Frex but if you like nors, dig
 up the under-appreciated Preminger classic, Anatomy of a Murder. Duke Ellington wrote&performed the score! Anyway: Happy Christmas from
 all of us. You are more important than you know, and more loved than you believe. Things will get better, give it time.
alexdecampi:
Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe
Bucky’s shirt a low-key nod to @buckykingofmemes, who we adore
Previously in Hell: cover image // 01 // 02 // 03 // Xmas // 04 // 05 // 06 // That time the Punisher’s creator gave us a thumbs-up // twitter // insta

HOW did I get a shoutout in this A YEAR AGO and never knew about it?? This series is excellent! Look at that drowsy Bucky!

alexdecampi: Hells Kitchen Movie Club Xmas Special! Ho ho ho, motherfuckers! Love from me, @dave-acosta and @deecunniffe Bucky’s shirt a low...

Amazon, Complex, and Jeff Bezos: Dazed Jeff Bezos Realizes He Spent Entire Conversation Thinking About How To Automate Person Talking To Him theonion: SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversation thinking about how to automate the person talking to him. “Sorry, could you repeat that? I just lost focus for a second [as I indifferently watched you open and close your mouth, becoming increasingly aware of the fact that a simple machine could do the exact same things as you],” Bezos said to the Amazon vice president in front of him, even as he resumed brainstorming a complex algorithm that would streamline the executive’s duties, perform them with greater speed and efficiency, and possibly even capture some of his unique human qualities to make it user-friendly. “Whoops, there I go again. I must’ve spaced out [after realizing I could probably render you completely irrelevant within just a few years]. I guess I’m really distracted today [by the tantalizing thought of an automaton executing every one of your relevant functions for no salary with never a single complaint].” Bezos, who suddenly recalled a series of vivid dreams from the previous night in which he automated the entire American workforce, went on to apologize for not getting much sleep.
Amazon, Complex, and Jeff Bezos: Dazed Jeff Bezos Realizes
 He Spent Entire Conversation
 Thinking About How To Automate
 Person Talking To Him
theonion:

SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversation thinking about how to automate the person talking to him. “Sorry, could you repeat that? I just lost focus for a second [as I indifferently watched you open and close your mouth, becoming increasingly aware of the fact that a simple machine could do the exact same things as you],” Bezos said to the Amazon vice president in front of him, even as he resumed brainstorming a complex algorithm that would streamline the executive’s duties, perform them with greater speed and efficiency, and possibly even capture some of his unique human qualities to make it user-friendly. “Whoops, there I go again. I must’ve spaced out [after realizing I could probably render you completely irrelevant within just a few years]. I guess I’m really distracted today [by the tantalizing thought of an automaton executing every one of your relevant functions for no salary with never a single complaint].” Bezos, who suddenly recalled a series of vivid dreams from the previous night in which he automated the entire American workforce, went on to apologize for not getting much sleep.

theonion: SEATTLE—Suddenly snapping back to attention, a dazed Jeff Bezos reportedly realized Thursday that he had spent an entire conversa...