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Alive, Animals, and Beautiful: SPEED DATING TODAY! vixiano: thedirtythirty: wonderingifyoukneww: secretly-obsessed-with-fandoms: arylenchanted: ungratefullittleshit: msannedree: rowan-fcb: causewecan: creamsifemme-kitty: totallynotthecops: scars-of-stars: dragonsrequiem: deigns: its-jakeperalta: deigns: petl0vers: celebrity–outfits: its-jakeperalta: 10 REASONS TO ADOPT A PET You save a life. The cost of adoption is less than buying a pet. Most shelter animals have had medical treatment and are spayed/neutered, microchipped, and up to date with vaccines. There are more unique pets to choose from in shelters. Age, breeds, mixed breeds, and personality choices are greater. Many are already trained. Your bed is pre-warmed on cold winter nights. Animals are just ready to love you, no matter what. Adopting from a shelter opens a cage for another pet who needs a new forever home. An adult pet takes the guess work out of determining size, thickness of coat, and energy level. Mixed breeds are unique compared to purebreeds and may have less genetically inherited health problems. Take this quiz to find out which dog is right for you! Please adopt some lovely doggos As someone who just adopted a third doggo from the shelter, please do it if you can find a dog right for you. Those shelters do everything they can to keep them alive, but it’s a family that keeps them happy. Okay, but is there a quiz for which shelter kitty I should get? @deigns​  good u asked, yes!!! sorry I forgot to add that one, anyway here is it What Breed of Cat should you get? Ty jake peralta Plus? Those animals in the pound? They KNOW that they are on death row. My first dog as a married woman was an eleventh hour adoption. A 13-y-o basset hound mix (pound said they thought he was 11 because they were trying to save him by making him sound a teeny bit younger) and he was “Til death do we part” loyal. We lost him 4 years later to cancer, and we (the family had grown from 2 to 3 humans) were devastated. My sister? Fosters cats, and ended up with a charmer who’d been hit by a car. Sephiroth is a well loved asshole, and his brother, Cloud (a stray who found a sucker bet), is almost canine levels of friendly. Be a superhero. Save a life. Rescue. As someone who has worked in a shelter for two years and watched many of my babies go to their incredible forever homes, you wouldn’t BELIEVE how big of a difference you can see in the animals’ behavior from being in the kennels to even just a few minutes after leaving. When their new owners are filling out the paperwork, there’s already a new spark in their eyes. They KNOW they’re going home; they know they’re getting to be loved the way all animals deserve to be. There are so many beautiful animals in shelters that get overlooked. Next time you’re searching for a companion, check your local shelters and rescues. Not only are you getting a companion, but you’re saving a life. I got my Norwegian Forest Cat from a shelter. He’s huge, and never shuts up, and is moody and a prolific hunter (or was. He’s not allowed out), and the biggest cuddliest mamas boy on the planet. i just adopted my first cat from the humane society ! her name is Persephone and she’s 14 almost 15 years old. i love my angel so much. I got all three of my cats from shelters and they are honestly so appreciative! They are amazing little creatures and have become the light of my life…. please adopt!! You won’t regret it and neither will your little ball of fur. This cutie used to be a stray in Greece. A lot of people try to poisen them, because there are so many strays there (which is the peoples fault. They buy puppies and leave them on the streets when they are older). I‘m happy, I had the chance to safe my little lady. I still wish to safe more. They are always so happy when you only pet them or just give them a bit of attention. My babies Penelope and Eloise were irresponsibly let outside without being spayed. Both got pregnant and their owner dumped them at the shelter two weeks before they were due with kittens. Due to being full to capacity, they were immediately at the top of the kill list. Thankfully a foster rescued them, got them healthy, helped them birth nine healthy kittens between the two of them, rescued four more orphan kittens that these girls adopted and nursed, got them ALL fixed, got ALL THIRTEEN kittens good homes, and I adopted these silly, destructive, adorable, loud, cuddle bugs. They’re a bonded pair, and they’ve brought light and love and laughter into my life. Please adopt!!!! Please fix your pets! Save a love, be compassionate, and find your best friend! Both adopted in a shelter. Best decision I have ever made. My husband and I adopted this little ball of love from a shelter and he’s literally the most amazing dog in the world. ❤️ got all four of my loves from our local shelter. absolute sweethearts ❤️ Got this pretty fur ball from a local shelter 🥰 #adoptdontshop The future wife and I adopted this 3-legged snuggle bug from our local humane society this summer and it’s one of, if not THE, best decision we have made ❤️🥰 My adopted baby! Please don’t disregard shelters just because you want a certain breed! Either sign up to volunteer at a shelter (you’ll get the inside scoop on the dogs/cats) or visit the shelter every day or every other day. There are always so many different breeds, some just get scooped up quicker than others! My precious boy!!! We actually adopted him throigh Facebook from Romania - if your shelter doesn’t have the breed you want, there are so many other places to look! Follow rescue centre pages on social media and look on websites!
Alive, Animals, and Beautiful: SPEED
 DATING
 TODAY!
vixiano:
thedirtythirty:

wonderingifyoukneww:

secretly-obsessed-with-fandoms:

arylenchanted:

ungratefullittleshit:


msannedree:

rowan-fcb:

causewecan:

creamsifemme-kitty:


totallynotthecops:

scars-of-stars:

dragonsrequiem:


deigns:

its-jakeperalta:

deigns:

petl0vers:

celebrity–outfits:

its-jakeperalta:

10 REASONS TO ADOPT A PET
You save a life.
The cost of adoption is less than buying a pet.
Most shelter animals have had medical treatment and are spayed/neutered, microchipped, and up to date with vaccines.
There are more unique pets to choose from in shelters. Age, breeds, mixed breeds, and personality choices are greater.
Many are already trained.
Your bed is pre-warmed on cold winter nights.
Animals are just ready to love you, no matter what.
Adopting from a shelter opens a cage for another pet who needs a new forever home.
An adult pet takes the guess work out of determining size, thickness of coat, and energy level.
Mixed breeds are unique compared to purebreeds and may have less genetically inherited health problems.
Take this quiz to find out which dog is right for you!

Please adopt some lovely doggos



As someone who just adopted a third doggo from the shelter, please do it if you can find a dog right for you. Those shelters do everything they can to keep them alive, but it’s a family that keeps them happy.





Okay, but is there a quiz for which shelter kitty I should get?



@deigns​ 

good u asked, yes!!! sorry I forgot to add that one, anyway here is it


What Breed of Cat should you get? 



Ty jake peralta


Plus? Those animals in the pound? They KNOW that they are on death row. My first dog as a married woman was an eleventh hour adoption. A 13-y-o basset hound mix (pound said they thought he was 11 because they were trying to save him by making him sound a teeny bit younger) and he was “Til death do we part” loyal. We lost him 4 years later to cancer, and we (the family had grown from 2 to 3 humans) were devastated.
My sister? Fosters cats, and ended up with a charmer who’d been hit by a car. Sephiroth is a well loved asshole, and his brother, Cloud (a stray who found a sucker bet), is almost canine levels of friendly.
Be a superhero. Save a life. Rescue.


As someone who has worked in a shelter for two years and watched many of my babies go to their incredible forever homes, you wouldn’t BELIEVE how big of a difference you can see in the animals’ behavior from being in the kennels to even just a few minutes after leaving. When their new owners are filling out the paperwork, there’s already a new spark in their eyes. They KNOW they’re going home; they know they’re getting to be loved the way all animals deserve to be. There are so many beautiful animals in shelters that get overlooked. Next time you’re searching for a companion, check your local shelters and rescues. Not only are you getting a companion, but you’re saving a life. 


I got my Norwegian Forest Cat from a shelter. He’s huge, and never shuts up, and is moody and a prolific hunter (or was. He’s not allowed out), and the biggest cuddliest mamas boy on the planet. 


i just adopted my first cat from the humane society ! her name is Persephone and she’s 14 almost 15 years old. i love my angel so much. 




I got all three of my cats from shelters and they are honestly so appreciative! They are amazing little creatures and have become the light of my life…. please adopt!! You won’t regret it and neither will your little ball of fur. 


This cutie used to be a stray in Greece. A lot of people try to poisen them, because there are so many strays there (which is the peoples fault. They buy puppies and leave them on the streets when they are older).
I‘m happy, I had the chance to safe my little lady. I still wish to safe more. They are always so happy when you only pet them or just give them a bit of attention.




My babies Penelope and Eloise were irresponsibly let outside without being spayed. Both got pregnant and their owner dumped them at the shelter two weeks before they were due with kittens. Due to being full to capacity, they were immediately at the top of the kill list. Thankfully a foster rescued them, got them healthy, helped them birth nine healthy kittens between the two of them, rescued four more orphan kittens that these girls adopted and nursed, got them ALL fixed, got ALL THIRTEEN kittens good homes, and I adopted these silly, destructive, adorable, loud, cuddle bugs. They’re a bonded pair, and they’ve brought light and love and laughter into my life. Please adopt!!!! Please fix your pets! Save a love, be compassionate, and find your best friend! 




Both adopted in a shelter. Best decision I have ever made.




My husband and I adopted this little ball of love from a shelter and he’s literally the most amazing dog in the world. ❤️ 




got all four of my loves from our local shelter. absolute sweethearts ❤️


Got this pretty fur ball from a local shelter 🥰  #adoptdontshop 




The future wife and I adopted this 3-legged snuggle bug from our local humane society this summer and it’s one of, if not THE, best decision we have made ❤️🥰


My adopted baby! Please don’t disregard shelters just because you want a certain breed! Either sign up to volunteer at a shelter (you’ll get the inside scoop on the dogs/cats) or visit the shelter every day or every other day. There are always so many different breeds, some just get scooped up quicker than others!


My precious boy!!! We actually adopted him throigh Facebook from Romania - if your shelter doesn’t have the breed you want, there are so many other places to look! Follow rescue centre pages on social media and look on websites!

vixiano: thedirtythirty: wonderingifyoukneww: secretly-obsessed-with-fandoms: arylenchanted: ungratefullittleshit: msannedree: rowan-...

Target, Tumblr, and Vision: Ppl will go to the library and pull out their laptop, textbook, agenda, multicoloured pens, 2 calculators and a large coffee just to sit there like this for 2 hours carpeted: beyoncescock: pepethefrogblog: beyoncescock: this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr while taking random quizzes like how much common sense do you have which i dont need to take cause i probably have none nice self burn now where do you get those stupid quizzes cause i need something to distract me from my research paper im in class and i productively gathered my fave quizzes for you instead of listening to my professor ramble about machine learning How much common sense do you actually have?** (i got 8/11) Take this vision test and we’ll guess what color your eyes are These 18 questions will tell you what dog breed you’re compatible with** Your choice of words will determine what age you belong to We can guess your soulmate’s name based on these questions about your exes What nationality are you according to your personality?** Can we guess where you actually live? Most Americans can’t score 10/12 on this state geography test. Can you? Only 1% of people can name these everyday things** (i got 8/18) Can we guess where you grew up based on your taste in snacks? Take this test to see how you’ll most likely die** **my favorites picks rihannna just in case
Target, Tumblr, and Vision: Ppl will go to the library and pull out their
 laptop, textbook, agenda, multicoloured
 pens, 2 calculators and a large coffee
 just to sit there like this for 2 hours
carpeted:
beyoncescock:

pepethefrogblog:

beyoncescock:


this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr while taking random quizzes like how much common sense do you have which i dont need to take cause i probably have none
nice self burn now where do you get those stupid quizzes cause i need something to distract me from my research paper

im in class and i productively gathered my fave quizzes for you instead of listening to my professor ramble about machine learning

How much common sense do you actually have?** (i got 8/11)

Take this vision test and we’ll guess what color your eyes are

These 18 questions will tell you what dog breed you’re compatible with**
Your choice of words will determine what age you belong to
We can guess your soulmate’s name based on these questions about your exes

What nationality are you according to your personality?**

Can we guess where you actually live?
Most Americans can’t score 10/12 on this state geography test. Can you?

Only 1% of people can name these everyday things** (i got 8/18)

Can we guess where you grew up based on your taste in snacks?

Take this test to see how you’ll most likely die**

**my favorites

picks rihannna just in case

carpeted: beyoncescock: pepethefrogblog: beyoncescock: this is me pretending to do homework when im really scrolling through tumblr whil...

Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly Disagree Disagree between Agree Agree 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going. goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: tantefledermaus: fromonesurvivortoanother: telegantmess: angryflyingstar: angst420: job applications just keep getting weirder….. pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil. this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals   When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.   “Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes.       The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”      The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?”  “Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.        The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”       The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?” Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.   ^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :( And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden. Oh! That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work. They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical. We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills! Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things. My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree” Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out. For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire” It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.
Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: ...

Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly Disagree Disagree between Agree Agree 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going. goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: tantefledermaus: fromonesurvivortoanother: telegantmess: angryflyingstar: angst420: job applications just keep getting weirder….. pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil. this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals   When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.   “Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes.       The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”      The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?”  “Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.        The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”       The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?” Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.   ^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :( And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden. Oh! That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work. They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical. We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills! Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things. My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree” Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out. For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire” It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.
Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

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