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Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren nsfb Strap one This is my first post, so here goes nothing here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks. First off, the cast: EP (twat mom) Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse) Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner) So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole tactic for dealing with people I don't like I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often met with that responce when immediately the EP says met with that responce when immediately the EP says EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig! (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig) My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword. EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying) EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!! now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras, obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind. Me: no, go som- EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!! I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of privacy privacy Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport EP: DONT YOU FUCKI Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT! EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was referring Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me a reason to kick YOU off EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me. EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!! at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by everyone else because i already broke the facade to them Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take- EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to spook him into moving) and your little crying child too. EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for Me: EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT! she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!! to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim. Staff: did you use the lightning hand? it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK. Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right? FP heams from this sentence and sAVS EP beams from this sentence and says EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus! Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend. EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we? EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we? Me: indeed sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the kid went and its the only thing i regret. people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup in case shit hits the fan The ultimate neckbeard.
Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren
 nsfb
 Strap
 one
 This is my first post, so here goes nothing
 here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit
 near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and
 tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks.
 First off, the cast:
 EP (twat mom)
 Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse)
 Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner)
 So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look
 like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand
 crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am
 a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole
 tactic for dealing with people I don't like
 I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand
 (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I
 was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away
 cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence
 made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they
 call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about
 half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig!
 (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig)
 My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know
 EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword.
 EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying)
 EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!!
 now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras,
 obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind.
 Me: no, go som-
 EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!!
 I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a
 train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition
 I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea
 glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of
 privacy
 privacy
 Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport
 EP: DONT YOU FUCKI
 Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT!
 EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was
 referring
 Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me
 a reason to kick YOU off
 EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am
 now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and
 his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me.
 EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!!
 at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by
 everyone else because i already broke the facade to them
 Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take-
 EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE
 Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to
 spook him into moving) and your little crying child too.
 EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on
 my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it
 connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 Me:
 EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT!
 she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if
 Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter
 for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then
 object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she
 wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately
 started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a
 burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see
 as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard
 the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from
 the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed
 EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!!
 to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a
 concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG
 ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim.
 Staff: did you use the lightning hand?
 it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK.
 Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras
 EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will
 work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever
 Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right?
 FP heams from this sentence and sAVS
 EP beams from this sentence and says
 EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus!
 Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice
 with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend.
 EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON
 Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung
 Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we?
 EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we?
 Me: indeed
 sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that
 she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2
 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she
 tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it
 through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another
 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but
 what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the
 kid went and its the only thing i regret.
 people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup
 in case shit hits the fan
The ultimate neckbeard.

The ultimate neckbeard.

Ass, Bad, and Bitch: by nsfb This is my first post, so here goes nothing here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks. First off, the cast: EK (little hellspawn) Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse) Staff So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole tactic for dealing with people I don't like I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand (people assume both have the same abllity or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked likeI was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away cue the tvo shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is oftern met with that responce when immediately the EP says met with that responce when immediately the EP says EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig! (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig) My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword. EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying) EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASS!!! now here is where i continue the facade, as I made my voice as low as i could. I looked around and saw cameras, obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!! I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition i'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i have a glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of privacy privacy Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport- EP: DONT YOU FUCKI Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT! EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was referring Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me a reason to kick YOU off EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me. EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!! at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by everyone else because i already broke the facade to them. Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take- EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOU. (leans towards kid to spook him into moving) and your little crying child too. EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers will serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for you hit EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT! she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if course it would be loud) Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter Me: for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a burn, as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!! to be fair, I showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that I had a stun glove, and a concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG ass time ago, the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim. Staff: did you use the lightning hand? it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK. EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right? FP heame from this sentenre and sAVe EP beams from this sentence and says EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus! Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend. EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON! Me: 1 didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung. Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we? EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we? Me sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the kid went and its the only thing i regret. people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup in case shit hits the fan ago I love that over a thousand people fell for this bullshit. I guess you got points for creativity? ill be really honest, i think this is just one of those moments where everything connected. despite this i still didn't like the outcome. had the lady let me speak and not demand i move, her kid wouldn't have permanent issues with hooded people. and she wouldn't be in jail for the shit she did Shockingly Badass Bullshit.
Ass, Bad, and Bitch: by
 nsfb
 This is my first post, so here goes nothing
 here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit
 near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and
 tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks.
 First off, the cast:
 EK (little hellspawn)
 Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse)
 Staff
 So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look
 like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand
 crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am
 a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole
 tactic for dealing with people I don't like
 I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand
 (people assume both have the same abllity or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked likeI
 was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away
 cue the tvo shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence
 made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they
 call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about
 half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is oftern
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig!
 (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig)
 My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know
 EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword.
 EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying)
 EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASS!!!
 now here is where i continue the facade, as I made my voice as low as i could. I looked around and saw cameras,
 obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind
 EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!!
 I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a
 train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition
 i'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i have a
 glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of
 privacy
 privacy
 Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport-
 EP: DONT YOU FUCKI
 Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT!
 EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was
 referring
 Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me
 a reason to kick YOU off
 EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am
 now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and
 his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me.
 EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!!
 at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by
 everyone else because i already broke the facade to them.
 Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take-
 EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE
 Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOU. (leans towards kid to
 spook him into moving) and your little crying child too.
 EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on
 my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it
 connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers will
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 you hit
 EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT!
 she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if
 course it would be loud)
 Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter
 Me:
 for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then
 object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she
 wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately
 started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a
 burn, as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see
 as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard
 the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from
 the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed
 EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!!
 to be fair, I showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that I had a stun glove, and a
 concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG
 ass time ago, the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim.
 Staff: did you use the lightning hand?
 it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK.
 EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will
 work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever
 Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right?
 FP heame from this sentenre and sAVe
 EP beams from this sentence and says
 EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus!
 Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice
 with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend.
 EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON!
 Me: 1 didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung.
 Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we?
 EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we?
 Me
 sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that
 she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2
 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she
 tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it
 through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another
 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but
 what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the
 kid went and its the only thing i regret.
 people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup
 in case shit hits the fan
 ago
 I love that over a thousand people fell for this bullshit.
 I guess you got points for creativity?
 ill be really honest, i think this is just one of those moments where everything connected. despite this i still didn't like
 the outcome. had the lady let me speak and not demand i move, her kid wouldn't have permanent issues with hooded
 people. and she wouldn't be in jail for the shit she did
Shockingly Badass Bullshit.

Shockingly Badass Bullshit.

Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren nsfb Strap one This is my first post, so here goes nothing here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks. First off, the cast: EP (twat mom) Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse) Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner) So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole tactic for dealing with people I don't like I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often met with that responce when immediately the EP says met with that responce when immediately the EP says EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig! (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig) My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword. EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying) EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!! now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras, obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind. Me: no, go som- EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!! I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of privacy privacy Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport EP: DONT YOU FUCKI Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT! EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was referring Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me a reason to kick YOU off EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me. EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!! at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by everyone else because i already broke the facade to them Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take- EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to spook him into moving) and your little crying child too. EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for Me: EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT! she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!! to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim. Staff: did you use the lightning hand? it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK. Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right? FP heams from this sentence and sAVS EP beams from this sentence and says EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus! Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend. EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we? EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we? Me: indeed sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the kid went and its the only thing i regret. people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup in case shit hits the fan This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...
Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren
 nsfb
 Strap
 one
 This is my first post, so here goes nothing
 here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit
 near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and
 tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks.
 First off, the cast:
 EP (twat mom)
 Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse)
 Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner)
 So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look
 like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand
 crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am
 a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole
 tactic for dealing with people I don't like
 I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand
 (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I
 was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away
 cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence
 made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they
 call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about
 half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig!
 (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig)
 My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know
 EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword.
 EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying)
 EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!!
 now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras,
 obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind.
 Me: no, go som-
 EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!!
 I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a
 train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition
 I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea
 glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of
 privacy
 privacy
 Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport
 EP: DONT YOU FUCKI
 Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT!
 EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was
 referring
 Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me
 a reason to kick YOU off
 EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am
 now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and
 his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me.
 EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!!
 at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by
 everyone else because i already broke the facade to them
 Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take-
 EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE
 Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to
 spook him into moving) and your little crying child too.
 EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on
 my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it
 connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 Me:
 EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT!
 she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if
 Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter
 for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then
 object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she
 wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately
 started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a
 burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see
 as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard
 the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from
 the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed
 EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!!
 to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a
 concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG
 ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim.
 Staff: did you use the lightning hand?
 it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK.
 Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras
 EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will
 work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever
 Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right?
 FP heams from this sentence and sAVS
 EP beams from this sentence and says
 EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus!
 Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice
 with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend.
 EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON
 Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung
 Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we?
 EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we?
 Me: indeed
 sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that
 she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2
 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she
 tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it
 through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another
 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but
 what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the
 kid went and its the only thing i regret.
 people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup
 in case shit hits the fan
This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...

This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...

Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren nsfb Strap one This is my first post, so here goes nothing here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks. First off, the cast: EP (twat mom) Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse) Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner) So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole tactic for dealing with people I don't like I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often met with that responce when immediately the EP says met with that responce when immediately the EP says EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig! (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig) My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword. EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying) EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!! now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras, obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind. Me: no, go som- EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!! I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of privacy privacy Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport EP: DONT YOU FUCKI Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT! EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was referring Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me a reason to kick YOU off EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me. EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!! at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by everyone else because i already broke the facade to them Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take- EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to spook him into moving) and your little crying child too. EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for Me: EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT! she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!! to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim. Staff: did you use the lightning hand? it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK. Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right? FP heams from this sentence and sAVS EP beams from this sentence and says EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus! Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend. EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we? EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we? Me: indeed sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the kid went and its the only thing i regret. people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup in case shit hits the fan This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...
Ass, Bad, and Bitch: [ren
 nsfb
 Strap
 one
 This is my first post, so here goes nothing
 here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit
 near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and
 tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks.
 First off, the cast:
 EP (twat mom)
 Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse)
 Staff (knew me and were chill as a stoner)
 So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look
 like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand
 crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am
 a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole
 tactic for dealing with people I don't like
 I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand
 (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I
 was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away
 cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence
 made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they
 call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about
 half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig!
 (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig)
 My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know
 EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword.
 EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying)
 EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!!
 now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras,
 obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind.
 Me: no, go som-
 EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!!
 I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a
 train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition
 I'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea
 glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of
 privacy
 privacy
 Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport
 EP: DONT YOU FUCKI
 Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT!
 EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was
 referring
 Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me
 a reason to kick YOU off
 EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am
 now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and
 his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me.
 EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!!
 at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by
 everyone else because i already broke the facade to them
 Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take-
 EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE
 Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to
 spook him into moving) and your little crying child too.
 EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on
 my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it
 connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers wil
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 Me:
 EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT!
 she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if
 Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter
 for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then
 object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she
 wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately
 started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a
 burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see
 as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard
 the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from
 the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed
 EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!!
 to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a
 concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG
 ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim.
 Staff: did you use the lightning hand?
 it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK.
 Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras
 EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will
 work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever
 Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right?
 FP heams from this sentence and sAVS
 EP beams from this sentence and says
 EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus!
 Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice
 with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend.
 EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON
 Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung
 Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we?
 EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we?
 Me: indeed
 sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that
 she was disturbing the peace. the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2
 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she
 tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it
 through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another
 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but
 what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the
 kid went and its the only thing i regret.
 people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup
 in case shit hits the fan
This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...

This is the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...

Ass, Bad, and Bitch: xL Entitled Moron attacks the worst target possible (self.entitledparents) entitlodparents nsfb Strap one This is my first post, so here goes nothing here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks. First off, the cast: Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse) me So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole tactic for dealing with people I don't like I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often met with that responce when immediately the EP says met with that responce when immediately the EP says EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig! (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig) My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword. EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying) EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!! now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras, obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind. Me: no, go som- EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!! I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition i'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of privacy privacy Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport EP: DONT YOU FUCKI Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT! EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was referring Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me a reason to kick YOU off EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me. EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!! at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by everyone else because i already broke the facade to them. Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take- EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to spook him into moving) and your little crying child too. EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers will serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for Me: EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!! to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim. Staff: did you use the lightning hand? it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK. Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right? FP heams from this sentence and sAVS EP beams from this sentence and says EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus! Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend. EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we? EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we? Me: indeed sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that she was disturbing the peace, the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the kid went and its the only thing i regret. people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup in case shit hits the fan Some of the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...
Ass, Bad, and Bitch: xL Entitled Moron attacks the worst target possible (self.entitledparents)
 entitlodparents
 nsfb
 Strap
 one
 This is my first post, so here goes nothing
 here's the TL;DR of it all: I got on bus, radiating a fake deadly appearance. Mom and Kid get on and sit
 near me, then demand i move because i'm scary. I bait the mom into attacking and get her arrested and
 tased. the whole time the kid is shitting bricks.
 First off, the cast:
 Me (a legal hellspawn, even worse)
 me
 So there's 3 things that are relatively important here: I have a custom made trenchcoat that almost makes me look
 like a mask-less Plague Doctor, and it holds 2 things, a tiny book with every law in my region (MERICA), and a hand
 crafted metal-tipped shock glove (it looks like Freddy Kruger's but its got tiny tips instead of long claws). I myself am
 a really thin and lanky man, giving an even more threatening radiance. this is stupidly important as its my whole
 tactic for dealing with people I don't like
 I was taking the train, not very full but still cramped. I was wearing my shock glove and a mimic on the other hand
 (people assume both have the same ability or assume the mimic has it so they get confused) so i literally looked like I
 was there to reap souls. this scared a good deal of younger people but once i open my mouth the facade goes away
 cue the two shitstains that hop on 3 stops later, desperately looking for a seat. I was standing up but my presence
 made about 5 available spots. the two head up and down the bus and go to sit, looking at their expensive toys they
 call phones, the minute they sit, they scope out the nearby area, only to immediately see deaths son standing about
 half a foot away. the kid panics, which i expected, I was just about to tell them its ok and that my appearence is often
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 met with that responce when immediately the EP says
 EP: you need to move, your scaring my son you twig!
 (I eat almost 6 times more than everyone else in my household, but it still hurts to be called a twig)
 My tactic here is to say nothing and get my book of law, because i had a feeling i was gonna have to use it. I know
 EP's because of this subreddit so I had to prepare to use my pen and sword.
 EK: MOMMY THAT MAN IS SCARY!!!! (he then spends about 2 minutes crying)
 EP: HEY YOU, QUIT IGNORING ME AND MOVE YOUR ASs!!!
 now here is where i continue the facade, as i made my voice as low as i could. i looked around and saw cameras,
 obviously for surveillance, so i kept that in mind.
 Me: no, go som-
 EP: YOU BETTER MOVE RIGHT FUCKING NOW OR IM GETTING YOU KICKED OFF THE TRAIN!!!
 I pull out my book and immediately go to counter her claim. its literally impossible for someone to be kicked off a
 train unless they have done something worthy of the police. a threatening appearance is not police worthy. in addition
 i'm a regular bus member as walking is something that would get me into even more trouble, considering i havea
 glove that can make plasma and look like The Punisher's sidekick. I'm censoring the legal jargon for the sake of
 privacy
 privacy
 Me: your legally unable to do that, article section says nobody is able to be denied public transport
 EP: DONT YOU FUCKI
 Me: TO BE DENIED PUBLIC TRANSPORT UNLESS COMMITTING AN ACT WORTHY OF POLICE INVOLVEMENT!
 EP then takes my book and goes to rip it, to which i force it out of her hands and point exactly to where i was
 referring
 Me: so unless you have a reason to kick me off, you cannot deny a passenger access. now shut up before you give me
 a reason to kick YOU off
 EP takes this immediately and is visibly stunned, while her kid is even more terrified as i dropped my smile and am
 now facing him and his mother. he looks like he is staring right at Micheal Myers, stalker music and everything, and
 his eyes would explode if they got any bigger. EP tries to bluff me.
 EP: then ill kick you off the bus for disturbing the peace!!!
 at this point everyone is angry and looking directly at not me, but her. it is very clear that I have been ignored by
 everyone else because i already broke the facade to them.
 Me: while its true Disturbing the Peace counts as a action you could take-
 EP: I KNEW IT, NOW MOVE
 Me: the cameras and passengers both clearly show that the one disturbing the peace is YOu. (leans towards kid to
 spook him into moving) and your little crying child too.
 EP sees the lean as an opportunity to attack, presumably in self defense, which i will admit, the lean was a mistake on
 my part. I had already put the law book away and turned on my glove while she was stunned, and when she swung, it
 connected, as i allowed it to. this puts her at a disadvantage legally, and if she goes to hit again, the passengers will
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 serve as witness to a magic trick they would beg me for
 Me:
 EP: YES I DID, AND I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU DONT MOVE THIS INSTANT
 she has no idea to the rather high pitched sound coming from my hand (i made the glove from some stun gloves so if
 Me: do it, i fucking dare you you defective flyswatter
 for those that thought Bitch was a better insult, i dare you to say this to someone. take an adjective, insult, then
 object and you get some really fucked up insults. this worked, and i baited her to stand up and go to swing again, she
 wound up her arm, making it easy for me to catch. the moment my fingers touched EP's hand she immediately
 started locking up and dropped to her knees. I had to let go after a second or it would have been enough to cause a
 burn. as she was seizing up still i put my fingers together and slowly spread them apart for all the passengers to see
 as i gave them a cool lightning web before i turned it off. both swings were seen on camera and the passengers heard
 the sound my hand made well in advance. EK saw the lightning and went into the fetal position. EP recovered from
 the shock, and screamed for the security. some staff showed up and asked what was going on, to which EP screamed
 EP: THIS PEDOPHILE ATTACKED ME WITH HIS DEMON FINGERS!!!
 to be fair, i showed the staff and upper management of the whole station network that i had a stun glove, and a
 concealed carry license just in case anyone thought a DIY Darth Sidious hand was classed as a lethal weapon, a LONG
 ass time ago. the staff knew i used it. this still pissed me off even though i knew she would try to play victim.
 Staff: did you use the lightning hand?
 it was here that i used my real voice, and smiled, immediately dropping the facade to the EP and EK.
 Me: oh absolutely, just watch the cameras
 EP, despite being told by me beforehand, JUST NOW spots the camera in perfect range of everything. she thinks it will
 work in her favor and casts the shittiest of all shit-eating grins ever
 Staff: why? you know we have to kick you off now? right?
 FP heams from this sentence and sAVS
 EP beams from this sentence and says
 EP: that's exactly what i fucking thought, YOU didn't move, so now your off the bus!
 Me: that would be the case if you hadn't hit me twice
 with this EP stops for a second, unable to comprehend.
 EP: I hit you in self defense, you tried to ATTACK MY SON
 Me: I didn't go to attack. I leaned in to get what i was saying through your thick skull and you swung
 Staff: well then lets look at the cameras shall we?
 EP, still thinking she was in the right: yes, lets look shall we?
 Me: indeed
 sure enough, the camera revealed her hitting me after leaning in towards them, and the witnesses took my side that
 she was disturbing the peace, the staff immediately had a PO on the train arrest her for Disturbing the Peace, 2
 counts of assault, 1 count assault of an officer, 1 count child endangerment, and 1 count of resisting arrest after she
 tried to attack the officer to make a break for it, to which my glove stopped her again. I knew she would not make it
 through court without some amount of jail time, so i decided "fuck it, why not" and pressed charges, adding another
 4k to the fines and guaranteeing the mothers doom. i felt bad for the kid, as i still really scared the shit outta him, but
 what can you do to try and get someone to stop thinking of you as death's fucked up cousin. I have no idea where the
 kid went and its the only thing i regret.
 people like this are exactly why i bought the law book, everything else was because I hate people and I like a backup
 in case shit hits the fan
Some of the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...

Some of the cringiest bullshit I have ever seen...