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Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
awesomacious:

A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C awesomacious: A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
awesomacious:

A greatly written story

awesomacious: A greatly written story

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and.. She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "l'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed funny.C A greatly written story
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and..
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "l'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed
 funny.C
A greatly written story

A greatly written story

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed. One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous. I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying! I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, I reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it gain. "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and... She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With. Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me.I do. The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the..." I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him. As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "I'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed. The Monster Under the Bed
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed.
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous.
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying!
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, I reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 gain.
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and...
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With.
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me.I
 do.
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own.
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the..." I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height.
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face.
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him.
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "I'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed.
The Monster Under the Bed

The Monster Under the Bed

Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case ef Fire De lot Use Elevator Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was n college, there was a particular class took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d" when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! Gotta love college
Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case ef Fire
 De lot Use
 Elevator
 Use Stairs
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the
 bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do
 random shit like this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was
 n college, there was a particular class took where, no matter what time
 you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor,
 you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how
 some professors are really obnoxious about attendance
 Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she
 reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the
 front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from
 walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a
 well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just
 like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like
 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one
 student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the
 floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor
 opened the door to the classroom
 He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d" when a security
 guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP
 DOING THAT!
Gotta love college

Gotta love college

Climbing, College, and Fire: in Case et Fire Elevator Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Wel, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here) He looks up from walking and he sees her He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! Impressive
Climbing, College, and Fire: in Case et Fire
 Elevator
 Use Stairs
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the
 bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do
 random shit like this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was
 in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time
 you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor
 you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how
 some professors are really obnoxious about attendance
 Wel, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she
 reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the
 front steps (super long rectangular building here) He looks up from
 walking and he sees her He then points to his watch, gives her a
 well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just
 like Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like
 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one
 student piss himself. They opened the window she rolled through, onto the
 floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor
 opened the door to the classroom
 He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d when a security
 guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP
 DOING THAT!
Impressive

Impressive

Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case et Fire Do lot Use Elevafor Use Stairs there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. He did a double take, started to say "How the held when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT!" “AND THEN THEY ALL CLAPPED”
Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case et Fire
 Do lot Use
 Elevafor
 Use Stairs
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the
 bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do
 random shit like this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was
 in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time
 you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor
 you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how
 some professors are really obnoxious about attendance
 Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she
 reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the
 front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from
 walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a
 well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just
 like Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like
 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one
 student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the
 floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor
 opened the door to the classroom.
 He did a double take, started to say "How the held when a security
 guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP
 DOING THAT!"
“AND THEN THEY ALL CLAPPED”

“AND THEN THEY ALL CLAPPED”

Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire Do tet Use Elevator Use Stairs haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random slike this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random s in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class i took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside. What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT! I've saved this before, but this time it has a picture!
Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire
 Do tet Use
 Elevator
 Use Stairs
 haedia:
 thewolfofnibu:
 stahscre4m:
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the
 bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do
 random slike this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random s in college. When I was
 in college, there was a particular class i took where, no matter what time
 you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor,
 you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how
 some professors are really obnoxious about attendance
 Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she
 reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the
 front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking
 and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning
 "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside.
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just
 like “Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like
 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one
 student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto
 the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor
 opened the door to the classroom
 He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-when a security
 guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP
 DOING THAT!
I've saved this before, but this time it has a picture!

I've saved this before, but this time it has a picture!

Fucking, Omg, and Tumblr: <p><a href="https://libertarian-lady.tumblr.com/post/175628696442/221b-ean-jacquez45-lovelyshuri" class="tumblr_blog">libertarian-lady</a>:</p> <blockquote><p><a href="https://221b-ean.tumblr.com/post/175592222769/jacquez45-lovelyshuri-ohifonlyx33" class="tumblr_blog">221b-ean</a>:</p><blockquote> <p><a href="https://jacquez45.tumblr.com/post/173784884455/lovelyshuri-ohifonlyx33-strawberrypatty" class="tumblr_blog">jacquez45</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://lovelyshuri.tumblr.com/post/173342139148/ohifonlyx33-strawberrypatty" class="tumblr_blog">lovelyshuri</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://ohifonlyx33.tumblr.com/post/173341793613/strawberrypatty-i-am-a-star-dragon" class="tumblr_blog">ohifonlyx33</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://strawberrypatty.tumblr.com/post/170670861462/i-am-a-star-dragon-gxtawxycar-marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">strawberrypatty</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="https://i-am-a-star-dragon.tumblr.com/post/170593956602/gxtawxycar-marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">i-am-a-star-dragon</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://gxtawxycar.tumblr.com/post/165527902271/marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">gxtawxycar</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>MARVEL </p> <p>link // <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHUrAvKNF8s">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHUrAvKNF8s</a> (collab w/ djcprod)</p> </blockquote> <p>Okay I’ll admit this the was really awesome and a really well matched to the song and edited</p> </blockquote> <p>That’s fucking tight.</p> </blockquote> <p>ting ting<br/>TING TING<br/>TING! TING!<br/>*panting out of breath gasps in time to the beat*<br/><br/>I LIVE FOR THIS STUFF</p> </blockquote> <p>fun fact a few months ago I showed this video to my 4 y/o brother and to this day he asks me to play the song (glitter and gold) because he is convinced it is “The Avengers Song™” </p> </blockquote> <p>one of the few fanvids that uses dialogue that I think actually really works</p> </blockquote> <p>THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING OMG IS SO HYPED</p> </blockquote> <p>perfect 👌👌</p></blockquote> <p>There’s also this one: <a href="https://youtu.be/23gr_kfmQ1o">https://youtu.be/23gr_kfmQ1o</a></p><p>Kickass Marvel edits are my aesthetic</p>
Fucking, Omg, and Tumblr: <p><a href="https://libertarian-lady.tumblr.com/post/175628696442/221b-ean-jacquez45-lovelyshuri" class="tumblr_blog">libertarian-lady</a>:</p>

<blockquote><p><a href="https://221b-ean.tumblr.com/post/175592222769/jacquez45-lovelyshuri-ohifonlyx33" class="tumblr_blog">221b-ean</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="https://jacquez45.tumblr.com/post/173784884455/lovelyshuri-ohifonlyx33-strawberrypatty" class="tumblr_blog">jacquez45</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://lovelyshuri.tumblr.com/post/173342139148/ohifonlyx33-strawberrypatty" class="tumblr_blog">lovelyshuri</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://ohifonlyx33.tumblr.com/post/173341793613/strawberrypatty-i-am-a-star-dragon" class="tumblr_blog">ohifonlyx33</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://strawberrypatty.tumblr.com/post/170670861462/i-am-a-star-dragon-gxtawxycar-marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">strawberrypatty</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="https://i-am-a-star-dragon.tumblr.com/post/170593956602/gxtawxycar-marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">i-am-a-star-dragon</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://gxtawxycar.tumblr.com/post/165527902271/marvel-link" class="tumblr_blog">gxtawxycar</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<p>MARVEL </p>
<p>link // <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHUrAvKNF8s">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHUrAvKNF8s</a> (collab w/ djcprod)</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Okay I’ll admit this the was really awesome and a really well matched to the song and edited</p>
</blockquote>
<p>That’s fucking tight.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>ting ting<br/>TING TING<br/>TING! TING!<br/>*panting out of breath gasps in time to the beat*<br/><br/>I LIVE FOR THIS STUFF</p>
</blockquote>
<p>fun fact a few months ago I showed this video to my 4 y/o brother and to this day he asks me to play the song (glitter and gold) because he is convinced it is “The Avengers Song™” </p>
</blockquote>
<p>one of the few fanvids that uses dialogue that I think actually really works</p>
</blockquote>

<p>THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING OMG IS SO HYPED</p>
</blockquote>

<p>perfect 👌👌</p></blockquote>

<p>There’s also this one: <a href="https://youtu.be/23gr_kfmQ1o">https://youtu.be/23gr_kfmQ1o</a></p><p>Kickass Marvel edits are my aesthetic</p>

libertarian-lady: 221b-ean: jacquez45: lovelyshuri: ohifonlyx33: strawberrypatty: i-am-a-star-dragon: gxtawxycar: MARVEL  link // ht...

Ass, Baseball, and Fall: jpg (46 KB, 1024x683) No.46363786 Anonymous 18 min. ago >be me >working register at mcd's like a fucking wagie mom and son come up >absolute units, their hands were fucking round perfectly fucking round, like a baseball little blob holding a small fish bowl, maybe they came back from Walmart after getting a fish poor fish, probably doesn't even get his ration of the fish food one of those families that has each family member go up to order for themselves hate these kinds of families mama blob starts ordering out of breath from standing in line >slams her elbows down onto the counter to rest while ordering could have fucking swore i heard the counter rumble yaah *pant* could i have a *pant* ahhhhh *pant* big Mac *pant* make that two actually... *pant* no three.... and a *pant* basket of fries and *pant* a large diet coke sweat beads fall down from her chins onto the table breathes in sharply struggles to take elbows off of table finally accomplishes the task finally accomplishes the task two huge wet marks take up the register section those are her fucking elbows her elbows actually fucking sweated little blob comes up to order "can i have 2 big Macs pant* a basket of fries.. *pant* make that two actually *pant* and a large diet Coke *pant* brings fish bowl out onto counter "and... *pant* fill this up *pant* with chocolate *pant* milkshake >a fucking fishbowl sorry, our largest size is a large. we cannot fill things that aren't McDonalds cups mama blob starts throwing a tantrum "HE WANTS HIS FUCKING MILKSHAKE SO GIVE IT TO HIM" maam, we cann >"LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR GOD DAMN MANAGER go get manager >he just repeats what I said tells her she can buy about 10 large milkshakes to fill it if she wants "DAS TOO EXPENSIVE!!!" "TOO MUCH CALORIES!!!" >me and manager stare at each other did she really just say that mama blob sees us looking at each other cont. whole restaurant has been quiet this whole time just looking at us >mama blob hears something turns her body to look backward >a gentle greasy breeze hits me >sees a couple people snickering turns back around "YOURE EMBARRASSING ME!!" >me and manager stay silent tears start to well up in her eyes could have just been sweat though face turns redder grabs her son's hand "WE'RE NEVER EATING HERE AGAIN!" >something deep down told me that wasn't true >pulls her son's hand waddles out hear her panting as she opens the door notice something >me and manager both notice it look at each other there was something brown in the middle of Hammy's ass could it be could it fucking be look at her legs brown liquid streaking the inside of her right leg >she sharted >she actually fucking sharted and left a brown trail had to febreeze the fuck out of that place for 5 minutes janitor almost puked cleaning it up Hammy &amp; Boy: A Shitty Quest for Fishbowl Milkshake
Ass, Baseball, and Fall: jpg (46 KB, 1024x683)
 No.46363786
 Anonymous
 18 min. ago
 >be me
 >working register at mcd's like a fucking wagie
 mom and son come up
 >absolute units, their hands were fucking round
 perfectly fucking round, like a baseball
 little blob holding a small fish bowl, maybe they
 came back from Walmart after getting a fish
 poor fish, probably doesn't even get his ration of the
 fish food
 one of those families that has each family member
 go up to order for themselves
 hate these kinds of families
 mama blob starts ordering
 out of breath from standing in line
 >slams her elbows down onto the counter to rest
 while ordering
 could have fucking swore i heard the counter
 rumble
 yaah *pant* could i have a *pant* ahhhhh *pant*
 big Mac *pant* make that two actually... *pant* no
 three.... and a *pant* basket of fries and *pant* a
 large diet coke
 sweat beads fall down from her chins onto the
 table
 breathes in sharply
 struggles to take elbows off of table
 finally accomplishes the task

 finally accomplishes the task
 two huge wet marks take up the register section
 those are her fucking elbows
 her elbows actually fucking sweated
 little blob comes up to order
 "can i have 2 big Macs pant* a basket of fries..
 *pant* make that two actually *pant* and a large diet
 Coke *pant*
 brings fish bowl out onto counter
 "and... *pant* fill this up *pant* with chocolate
 *pant* milkshake
 >a
 fucking
 fishbowl
 sorry, our largest size is a large. we cannot fill
 things that aren't McDonalds cups
 mama blob starts throwing a tantrum
 "HE WANTS HIS FUCKING MILKSHAKE SO GIVE IT
 TO HIM"
 maam, we cann
 >"LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR GOD DAMN MANAGER
 go get manager
 >he just repeats what I said
 tells her she can buy about 10 large milkshakes to
 fill it if she wants
 "DAS TOO EXPENSIVE!!!"
 "TOO MUCH CALORIES!!!"
 >me and manager stare at each other
 did she really just say that
 mama blob sees us looking at each other
 cont.

 whole restaurant has been quiet this whole time
 just looking at us
 >mama blob hears something
 turns her body to look backward
 >a gentle greasy breeze hits me
 >sees a couple people snickering
 turns back around
 "YOURE EMBARRASSING ME!!"
 >me and manager stay silent
 tears start to well up in her eyes
 could have just been sweat though
 face turns redder
 grabs her son's hand
 "WE'RE NEVER EATING HERE AGAIN!"
 >something deep down told me that wasn't true
 >pulls her son's hand
 waddles out
 hear her panting as she opens the door
 notice something
 >me and manager both notice it
 look at each other
 there was something brown in the middle of
 Hammy's ass
 could it be
 could it fucking be
 look at her legs
 brown liquid streaking the inside of her right leg
 >she sharted
 >she actually fucking sharted
 and left a brown trail
 had to febreeze the fuck out of that place for 5
 minutes
 janitor almost puked cleaning it up
Hammy &amp; Boy: A Shitty Quest for Fishbowl Milkshake

Hammy & Boy: A Shitty Quest for Fishbowl Milkshake

Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire Do lot Use Elevator Use Stairs thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance.  Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside. What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom.  He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!” omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS
Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire
 Do lot Use
 Elevator
 Use Stairs
thesilencedmasses:

adminover20:

radglawr:

haedia:

thewolfofnibu:

stahscre4m:

there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator

see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this

Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance. 
Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside.
What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING!
She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. 
He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!”

omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me


IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS


I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS

thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in th...

Climbing, Fall, and Funny: SHORT MEN! - w4m Are you a shorter man under the height of 5"? Do you have a sense of adventure? Do you like trying new experiences? Are you available in the next few days? Text me and let me know! do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers o email to friend best of 1 Back Contact Today 9:31 PM Hello Hello! Who is this? This is Isaac. i'm responding to a personal you posted looking for a date. Do you have any pics? Hold on there, Isaac. Is this the post looking for a man under the height of 5'? yes is I have to be honest, Isaac. I'm not actually looking for a date. I'm looking to hire a shorter man for a single task, for about an 1 hour. Well Paid. Nothing Sexual and Completely Above Board. How much and what $250 Ok, what's the job? My young son, Andrew, keeps opening his bedroom window at night even though I keep telling him not to. It's full-on winter right now and he's blowing up the heating bill when he does it. So if you agree, I'm going to tell him that if he doesn't close the window, a fat evil dwarf will climb into his window and steal all of his toys. I have a ladder for you to climb up to the window and walkie talkies for us to talk When you start climbing into the window, make lots of panting/grunting sounds to wake Andrew. When I hear him yell, I will run into the room with a large broom and bug repellent which I will spray you with before shoving you out of the window with the broom. I have purchased a very large bean bag bed from Sharper Image that we will put under the window for you to fall onto (only about 15 feet). 12AM would be the best time as I know Andrew will be asleep. I can also providea written reference you may add to your employment portfolio. is This is real? Yes, Isaac. And I need results. For sure its fine little job for little men.
Climbing, Fall, and Funny: SHORT MEN! - w4m
 Are you a shorter man under the height of 5"?
 Do you have a sense of adventure?
 Do you like trying new experiences?
 Are you available in the next few days?
 Text me and let me know!
 do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers
 o
 email to friend best of 1
 Back
 Contact
 Today 9:31 PM
 Hello
 Hello!
 Who is this?
 This is Isaac. i'm responding to
 a personal you posted looking
 for a date. Do you have any
 pics?
 Hold on there, Isaac. Is this
 the post looking for a man
 under the height of 5'?
 yes is
 I have to be honest, Isaac. I'm
 not actually looking for a date.
 I'm looking to hire a shorter
 man for a single task, for
 about an 1 hour. Well Paid.
 Nothing Sexual and Completely
 Above Board.
 How much and what
 $250
 Ok, what's the job?
 My young son, Andrew, keeps
 opening his bedroom window
 at night even though I keep
 telling him not to. It's full-on
 winter right now and he's
 blowing up the heating bill
 when he does it. So if you
 agree, I'm going to tell him
 that if he doesn't close the
 window, a fat evil dwarf will
 climb into his window and steal
 all of his toys.
 I have a ladder for you to
 climb up to the window and
 walkie talkies for us to talk
 When you start climbing into
 the window, make lots of
 panting/grunting sounds to
 wake Andrew. When I hear
 him yell, I will run into the
 room with a large broom and
 bug repellent which I will spray
 you with before shoving you
 out of the window with the
 broom. I have purchased a
 very large bean bag bed from
 Sharper Image that we will put
 under the window for you to
 fall onto (only about 15 feet).
 12AM would be the best time
 as I know Andrew will be
 asleep. I can also providea
 written reference you may add
 to your employment portfolio.
 is This is real?
 Yes, Isaac. And I need results.
For sure its fine little job for little men.

For sure its fine little job for little men.

Climbing, College, and God: haedia there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like "Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-"when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed "STOP DOING THAT!" oh my god The things people can pull off in college
Climbing, College, and God: haedia
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or
 the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom
 to do random shit like this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I
 was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter
 what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before
 the professor, you wouldn't be counted late. I mean, that's a pretty
 cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about
 attendance
 Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As
 she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it
 to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up
 from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a
 well-meaning "Look who's late" face, and walks on inside
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was
 just like "Fuck it and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had
 like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making
 one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through,
 onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the
 professor opened the door to the classroom.
 He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-"when a
 security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and
 bellowed "STOP DOING THAT!"
 oh my god
The things people can pull off in college

The things people can pull off in college

Climbing, College, and Crazy: haedia: thewolfofoibu stabscre4n there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college, When I was in college, there was a particular class 1 took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn't be counted late, I mean, that's a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the bulding, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside. What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like "Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so. she was quite a ways up there). nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-"when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed STOP DOING THAT oh my god This dude is crazy brave
Climbing, College, and Crazy: haedia:
 thewolfofoibu
 stabscre4n
 there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the
 elevator
 see what intrigues me about college isn't the intellectual pursuit or
 the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom
 to do random shit like this
 Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college, When I
 was in college, there was a particular class 1 took where, no matter
 what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before
 the professor, you wouldn't be counted late, I mean, that's a pretty
 cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about
 attendance
 Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As
 she reached the edge of the bulding, she saw her professor making it
 to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up
 from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a
 well-meaning Look who's late" face, and walks on inside.
 What he didn't know, though, was that this particular student was like
 freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was
 just like "Fuck it" and SCALED THE BUILDING!
 She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had
 like 20ft ceilings, so. she was quite a ways up there). nearly making
 one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through
 onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the
 professor opened the door to the classroom
 He did a double take, started to say "How the hell d-"when a
 security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and
 bellowed STOP DOING THAT
 oh my god
This dude is crazy brave

This dude is crazy brave

80s, Bad, and Cats: h Halo is at the emergency vet with her 2nd battle with glaucoma. Back in September she had to have her right eye removed and the biopsy revealed it was primary glaucoma meaning it's hereditary & that inevitably we'd be right here dealing with the other eye. 😿 She's going to be sedated and the eye fully examined to determine the best course of action for this eye. From what we can tell (which has progressed so quickly in a matter of days just like last time), the vision is now gone during the day too (it was just a night a couple weeks ago) and she'll likely have to have this eye removed as well. She wasn't in pain until today and last week I proactively made an appt with the eye specialist because I knew we were getting close & needed to create a plan of action for when things got bad (which is when vision is totally lost). The appt was for 4:30 today. We didn't make it because of her waking up panting with pain and no vision at all. We brought her to emergency so she didn't have to suffer all day. This is how fast this awful disease progresses. Unlike people, pets can go from doing ok and managing with pressure drops to ending up at emergency within a weekend! Please read up on glaucoma and become familiar with the signs-symptoms. Many mistake a wet eye for seasonal allergies and it could be glaucoma. Cats can get glaucoma too so this isn't just for dog owners. Better to check and be safe than sorry. So now we wait.... we will update as soon as we know more. XOXO UPDATE: pressures were in the 80's & there is no vision so enucleation (eye removal) will be performed just like 9 months ago. Unfortunately that's just the way glaucoma ends most times. She will be pain free and back home tonight. This ordeal will finally be over and she can start acclimating to getting around without vision. Thank you all for all the love and well wishes! 😘😽
80s, Bad, and Cats: h
Halo is at the emergency vet with her 2nd battle with glaucoma. Back in September she had to have her right eye removed and the biopsy revealed it was primary glaucoma meaning it's hereditary & that inevitably we'd be right here dealing with the other eye. 😿 She's going to be sedated and the eye fully examined to determine the best course of action for this eye. From what we can tell (which has progressed so quickly in a matter of days just like last time), the vision is now gone during the day too (it was just a night a couple weeks ago) and she'll likely have to have this eye removed as well. She wasn't in pain until today and last week I proactively made an appt with the eye specialist because I knew we were getting close & needed to create a plan of action for when things got bad (which is when vision is totally lost). The appt was for 4:30 today. We didn't make it because of her waking up panting with pain and no vision at all. We brought her to emergency so she didn't have to suffer all day. This is how fast this awful disease progresses. Unlike people, pets can go from doing ok and managing with pressure drops to ending up at emergency within a weekend! Please read up on glaucoma and become familiar with the signs-symptoms. Many mistake a wet eye for seasonal allergies and it could be glaucoma. Cats can get glaucoma too so this isn't just for dog owners. Better to check and be safe than sorry. So now we wait.... we will update as soon as we know more. XOXO UPDATE: pressures were in the 80's & there is no vision so enucleation (eye removal) will be performed just like 9 months ago. Unfortunately that's just the way glaucoma ends most times. She will be pain free and back home tonight. This ordeal will finally be over and she can start acclimating to getting around without vision. Thank you all for all the love and well wishes! 😘😽

Halo is at the emergency vet with her 2nd battle with glaucoma. Back in September she had to have her right eye removed and the biopsy revea...

Dad, Drugs, and Dude: When a black person gives you the nigga pass" GOOD RELATIONS WITH THE WOOKIEES, I HAVE "Damn, I really aint tryna go to math" "Why?" "I have an essay today." "Forreal? That sucks." "Yea that's not even the worst part." "It's not?" "Mr. Goff is the sub." "JACK GOFF?" "Yup." "Isn't that the dude that got arrested for touching you a year ago?" "Yup, my buttocks are on lockdown mode." "How did he get out of jail so early?" "The government is too busy locking up people for drugs, so they're releasing "less offensive" criminals early. Welp, here it is." "Good luck on your essay babe." "Ah Goodmorning Daniel." "Morning Mr. Goff. Where is everyone?" "Seems you're a little early." "But Im always late..." "Oh?" "Plus its been 5 minutes since the bell... Hey, why are you locking the door?" "Hm? I always do this?" "Hell nah somethings fishy." "Is it Mr. Cole?" "What are you doing? Don't come near me!" "Dont be scared Mr. Cole, it wont hurt a bit." "DON'T FUCKIN TOUCH ME OLD MAN! AHHHHH-" "HEY! What's going on in here? WHAT THE FUCK? Why are you naked Mr. Goff?" "Mrs. G! Mr. Goff tried to-" "It was this horrible student Miss. He tried to fondle me." "WHAT?!" "Is that true Daniel?" "Of course not-" "Indeed it is true. I tried to stop him but you see, I am only an old man." "Daniel, come with me, we're calling your parents." "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING." I woke up in a cold sweat and was panting like a dog. "Something wrong baby?" "No dad, and can you not have an erection if you're gonna spoon me? Kinda gay."
Dad, Drugs, and Dude: When a black person gives you the
 nigga pass"
 GOOD RELATIONS WITH THE
 WOOKIEES, I HAVE
"Damn, I really aint tryna go to math" "Why?" "I have an essay today." "Forreal? That sucks." "Yea that's not even the worst part." "It's not?" "Mr. Goff is the sub." "JACK GOFF?" "Yup." "Isn't that the dude that got arrested for touching you a year ago?" "Yup, my buttocks are on lockdown mode." "How did he get out of jail so early?" "The government is too busy locking up people for drugs, so they're releasing "less offensive" criminals early. Welp, here it is." "Good luck on your essay babe." "Ah Goodmorning Daniel." "Morning Mr. Goff. Where is everyone?" "Seems you're a little early." "But Im always late..." "Oh?" "Plus its been 5 minutes since the bell... Hey, why are you locking the door?" "Hm? I always do this?" "Hell nah somethings fishy." "Is it Mr. Cole?" "What are you doing? Don't come near me!" "Dont be scared Mr. Cole, it wont hurt a bit." "DON'T FUCKIN TOUCH ME OLD MAN! AHHHHH-" "HEY! What's going on in here? WHAT THE FUCK? Why are you naked Mr. Goff?" "Mrs. G! Mr. Goff tried to-" "It was this horrible student Miss. He tried to fondle me." "WHAT?!" "Is that true Daniel?" "Of course not-" "Indeed it is true. I tried to stop him but you see, I am only an old man." "Daniel, come with me, we're calling your parents." "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING." I woke up in a cold sweat and was panting like a dog. "Something wrong baby?" "No dad, and can you not have an erection if you're gonna spoon me? Kinda gay."

"Damn, I really aint tryna go to math" "Why?" "I have an essay today." "Forreal? That sucks." "Yea that's not even the worst part." "It's no...

Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire Do lot Use Elevator Use Stairs thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance.  Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside. What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING! She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom.  He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!” omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS Ok once my friends and I set up a table with snacks in an elevator and pretended it was a fancy restaurant so when people walked in wed serve them food. It was going great until a cop by chance got on and told us to return the table but we could tell he was trying desperately hard not to laugh.
Climbing, College, and Fire: In Case of Fire
 Do lot Use
 Elevator
 Use Stairs
thesilencedmasses:
adminover20:

radglawr:

haedia:

thewolfofnibu:

stahscre4m:

there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator

see what intrigues me about college isn’t the intellectual pursuit or the bonding or whatever, its the fact that people have the freedom to do random shit like this

Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn’t be counted late. I mean, that’s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance. 
Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning “Look who’s late” face, and walks on inside.
What he didn’t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like “Fuck it” and SCALED THE BUILDING!
She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom. 
He did a double take, started to say “How the hell d—” when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed “STOP DOING THAT!”

omfg the amount of fucks college kids don’t give astounds me


IVE ONLY SEEN THIS POST IN SCREENSHOTS


I LOVE THE IMPLICATION THAT THIS STUDENT HAS A REPUTATION FOR SCALING THE BUILDINGS

Ok once my friends and I set up a table with snacks in an elevator and pretended it was a fancy restaurant so when people walked in wed serve them food. It was going great until a cop by chance got on and told us to return the table but we could tell he was trying desperately hard not to laugh.

thesilencedmasses: adminover20: radglawr: haedia: thewolfofnibu: stahscre4m: there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the...

Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s You're in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed. One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself. kittenwiskers Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years, and then she wasn't scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters... I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte's bed. Across the room underneath Daniel's crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, I reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and... She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With. Me. "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I do The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of my monsters; she's afraid of her own Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. "What the... I cut Francis's next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity." I promise to him. As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. "I'll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling." Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed. The monster
Bubba, Clock, and Crying: writing-prompt-s
 You're in charge of assigning every child
 on Earth the monster under their bed.
 One child in particular has caused every
 monster assigned to him/her to quit. You
 decide to assign yourself.
 kittenwiskers
 Case: #273402
 Status: Disastrous
 I stare at the file and realize I have no
 options, over the last 2 years every
 monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has
 quit, every last one. Her first monster; a
 giant goldfish-faced humanoid named
 Bubba, had been with her for four years,
 and then she wasn't scared of him
 anymore. After that it was a string of
 different common, uncommon, and rare
 monsters... I even assigned a sentient
 sock monster to her. He came back
 crying
 I look on my tablet, only one assignable
 monster left; myself. Field work has never
 been my cup of tea, but desperate times
 call for desperate measures. So at 8:03
 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte
 and her little brother Daniel; I slither into
 the space beneath Charlotte's bed.
 Across the room underneath Daniel's crib
 is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind
 of monster.
 I turn my attention to the bed above me,
 Charlotte is still awake but barely, I reach
 up over the bed and run an ice cold
 finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it
 again
 "I'm not afraid of you monster!" She
 whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can
 see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door
 somewhere in the house slams and there
 is an audible hitch of breath from above
 me. A few minutes go by I can hear
 Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There
 are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and
 loud panting breaths, Charlotte
 scrambles off the bed and...
 She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With.
 Me.
 "Move. Over!" Charlotte hisses at me. I
 do
 The door to the bedroom slams open and
 I smell the stench of human intoxicants
 before the man even steps inside.
 I know why Charlotte isn't afraid of any of
 my monsters; she's afraid of her own
 Francis reaches a hand under the bed
 and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to
 pull, I slither out.
 "What the... I cut Francis's next words
 off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height
 Looming over the drunken man I caress
 my cold fingers down his face
 "If you ever touch, scare, or harm my
 child again, I will find you, and I will do
 the same to you, for all eternity." I
 promise to him.
 As Francis runs from the room he soils
 himself.
 I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck
 her back under her covers and kiss her
 forehead goodnight. "I'll be back
 tomorrow night, sleep well darling."
 Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the
 monster under her bed.
The monster

The monster