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Bill Clinton, Bitch, and Driving: l Verizon 5:49 PM 0 * 42% whats-an-egg / safety-offcer-barto Salt and Pepper Diner is John Mulaney's funniest bit" is Xanax/Prostate Exam erasure and I will not stand for it officialqueer The overlooking of "The One Thing You Can't Replace" is a criminal act. jewishdragon LISTEN, I WAS JUST WATCHING JOHN MULANEY AND I RAISE YOU DUCKLINGS! bisexualgambit HOW COULD YOU NOT SAY DELTA AIRLINES???? kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd Bill Clinton Never Forgets A Bitch, Ever safety-officer-barto The responses to this post have been so amazing because it's reminded me, and I'm sure many others, of just how many hilarious bits John Mulaney has other than s&pd incendiarysongbird okay, but eighth graders doorstoplord could be a nursery awesomealfry being 12 years old on anotger continent is a great alibi starry-nightengale "Why buy the cow, question mark?" gadgethewolf THAT TALL CHILD LOOKS TERRIBLE apartmentofstabs And then. He ordered one black coffee for himself And kept driving spectralbarbhollano LOOK AT THAT HIGH WAISTED MAN, HE GOT FEMININE HIPS silly-slacker-person "We gon play jacks down at the soda fountain" NOBODY KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT YOU IDIOT Y'know, how you talk to your grandma? ghettoinuyasha hello? HUSH bakvvas Eat assy buck a dick, and bell druugs mellowstarscape THEREISAHORSE LOOSE INTHE HOSTPITAL Source: safety-officer-barto 82,341 notes > anduinsholydick Tailor Automatic Screenshot Stitching I’m sorry but there is a Norwegian cruise liner leaving for Martinique and my plan is we both get very dressed up, including hats
Bill Clinton, Bitch, and Driving: l Verizon
 5:49 PM
 0 * 42%
 whats-an-egg
 /
 safety-offcer-barto
 Salt and Pepper Diner is John Mulaney's
 funniest bit" is Xanax/Prostate Exam erasure
 and I will not stand for it
 officialqueer
 The overlooking of "The One Thing You Can't
 Replace" is a criminal act.
 jewishdragon
 LISTEN, I WAS JUST WATCHING JOHN
 MULANEY AND I RAISE YOU
 DUCKLINGS!
 bisexualgambit
 HOW COULD YOU NOT SAY DELTA
 AIRLINES????
 kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd
 Bill Clinton Never
 Forgets A Bitch, Ever
 safety-officer-barto
 The responses to this post have been so
 amazing because it's reminded me, and I'm
 sure many others, of just how many hilarious
 bits John Mulaney has other than s&pd
 incendiarysongbird
 okay, but eighth graders
 doorstoplord
 could be a nursery
 awesomealfry
 being 12 years old on anotger continent is a
 great alibi
 starry-nightengale
 "Why buy the cow, question mark?"
 gadgethewolf
 THAT TALL CHILD LOOKS TERRIBLE
 apartmentofstabs
 And then. He ordered one black coffee for
 himself
 And kept driving
 spectralbarbhollano
 LOOK AT THAT HIGH WAISTED MAN, HE GOT
 FEMININE HIPS
 silly-slacker-person
 "We gon play jacks down at the soda fountain"
 NOBODY KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING
 ABOUT YOU IDIOT
 Y'know, how you talk to your grandma?
 ghettoinuyasha
 hello? HUSH
 bakvvas
 Eat assy buck a dick,
 and bell druugs
 mellowstarscape
 THEREISAHORSE
 LOOSE
 INTHE
 HOSTPITAL
 Source: safety-officer-barto
 82,341 notes >
 anduinsholydick
 Tailor
 Automatic Screenshot Stitching
I’m sorry but there is a Norwegian cruise liner leaving for Martinique and my plan is we both get very dressed up, including hats

I’m sorry but there is a Norwegian cruise liner leaving for Martinique and my plan is we both get very dressed up, including hats

Be Like, Bless Up, and Chicago: Waiting to surprise my SO with this little nugget when she gets home from work. Reddit u/belatedpajamas @DrSmashlove Now people always wanna be like “wow how do you live in Chicago”, “damn smash Chicago is cold asf why not Miami”, “wow Chicago is big cold yuck.” OKAY. DUH. NOBODY SAYING IT’S WARM LOL. But the cold got benefits. For one, it make the holidays pretty. I don’t celebrate Christmas but all the pretty lights and snowflakes bruv that make me feel like I’m in a quaint, adorable little English village. On some “Cheerio chap! Yes very good govvenah! BRIYYANT!” 😂 U feel me? Heritage. Not my heritage - but somebody heritage lol! Fireplaces. Cozy lil fires. U feel me? Seasons. Now it’s also downsides. I keep water bottles in my car and them bottles freeze. No bueno asf. But a HALF FROZE bottle is a come up! If u catch it at the right point in the freeze life cycle it develop a water PP column right up the middle that osmularicizes coldness through water you pour into the bottle it and freezes it to the optimal gym water temp. Boom. One sip and u transported to the mountains of Norway bruv. U thirsty. U been walking for days. U come upon a comely Norwegian birb with a gaggle of aggressive huskies barking at u. U like “Ok these huskies don’t like my kind lmao RIP to me it was real”. She opens her mouth and whispers: “Jeg kan se din PP-utskrift gjennom din overcoat” (“I can see your PP print through your overcoat”). And then u like “aye short blond hair on white girls is sexy ol McCaulay Culkin Justin Bieber with a fatty lookin a$$ PAUSE.” And she like “come. Drink.” And she open her shroud which is made from a single uncut bison skin and she bare nekky and she put my head against her heart and pour water into my mouth like I’m her bb and I’m like “wow Scandinavians are wild but I love it.” That’s how soothing that half frozen ice PP water bottle taste bruv. Anyway then she fall in love with me and ask me to live among her people and I’m like “Jeg er her for en god stund, ikke lenge, du vet jeg” (“I'm here for a good time not a long time, you know **I**”). And she shed a single tear and I pet the huskies and depart homeward. BOTTOM LINE THAT HALF FROZEN WATER BOTTLE IS A GYM BLESSING BLESS UP 😍😂😂😂
Be Like, Bless Up, and Chicago: Waiting to surprise my SO with this
 little nugget when she gets home
 from work.
 Reddit u/belatedpajamas
 @DrSmashlove
Now people always wanna be like “wow how do you live in Chicago”, “damn smash Chicago is cold asf why not Miami”, “wow Chicago is big cold yuck.” OKAY. DUH. NOBODY SAYING IT’S WARM LOL. But the cold got benefits. For one, it make the holidays pretty. I don’t celebrate Christmas but all the pretty lights and snowflakes bruv that make me feel like I’m in a quaint, adorable little English village. On some “Cheerio chap! Yes very good govvenah! BRIYYANT!” 😂 U feel me? Heritage. Not my heritage - but somebody heritage lol! Fireplaces. Cozy lil fires. U feel me? Seasons. Now it’s also downsides. I keep water bottles in my car and them bottles freeze. No bueno asf. But a HALF FROZE bottle is a come up! If u catch it at the right point in the freeze life cycle it develop a water PP column right up the middle that osmularicizes coldness through water you pour into the bottle it and freezes it to the optimal gym water temp. Boom. One sip and u transported to the mountains of Norway bruv. U thirsty. U been walking for days. U come upon a comely Norwegian birb with a gaggle of aggressive huskies barking at u. U like “Ok these huskies don’t like my kind lmao RIP to me it was real”. She opens her mouth and whispers: “Jeg kan se din PP-utskrift gjennom din overcoat” (“I can see your PP print through your overcoat”). And then u like “aye short blond hair on white girls is sexy ol McCaulay Culkin Justin Bieber with a fatty lookin a$$ PAUSE.” And she like “come. Drink.” And she open her shroud which is made from a single uncut bison skin and she bare nekky and she put my head against her heart and pour water into my mouth like I’m her bb and I’m like “wow Scandinavians are wild but I love it.” That’s how soothing that half frozen ice PP water bottle taste bruv. Anyway then she fall in love with me and ask me to live among her people and I’m like “Jeg er her for en god stund, ikke lenge, du vet jeg” (“I'm here for a good time not a long time, you know **I**”). And she shed a single tear and I pet the huskies and depart homeward. BOTTOM LINE THAT HALF FROZEN WATER BOTTLE IS A GYM BLESSING BLESS UP 😍😂😂😂

Now people always wanna be like “wow how do you live in Chicago”, “damn smash Chicago is cold asf why not Miami”, “wow Chicago is big cold y...

College, Memes, and E-40: Aced a Foucas nozes e sementes todos os dias ajudam a prevenir doencas cardiacas, cancer e outras doencas ACREDITRINSSOOFICI OACREDITANISS @AcreditaNisso? Uma enorme análise de todos os estudos recentes sobre consumo de nozes mostra que pessoas que comem pelo menos 20g das sementes por dia têm menos riscos de doenças cardíacas, câncer e outras doenças. Esta quantidade diária de nozes – apenas um punhado – diminui em 30% as chances de doenças cardíacas, em 15% o risco de câncer e o risco de morte geral em 22%. Além disso, o consumo dessa quantia está associado à redução de 50% nos riscos de morte por doenças respiratórias e 40% menos chance de desenvolver diabetes. Esta meta-análise foi realizada por pesquisadores da Imperial College London (Inglaterra) e pela Norwegian University (Noruega), e foi publicada na revista BMC Medicine. Os pesquisadores analisaram 29 estudos publicados no mundo todo, que envolveram 819 mil participantes, sendo que 12 mil eram casos de doenças cardíacas coronárias, 9 mil de derrame, 18 mil de doenças cardiovasculares e câncer. Desses participantes, 85 mil morreram durante os longos estudos. Enquanto havia variação entre as populações estudadas, como entre homens e mulheres, pessoas vivendo em regiões diferentes ou pessoas com diferentes fatores de risco, os pesquisadores descobriram que o consumo de nozes trouxe benefício para a maioria deles. “Em estudos de nutrição a maioria da pesquisa é feita em grandes assassinos como doenças do coração, derrame e câncer, mas agora começamos e ver dados sobre outras doenças”, diz um dos autores, Dagfinn Aune. O estudo incluiu todo tipo de noz, como avelã e a noz comum. Ele também incluiu o amendoim, que na verdade é um tipo de legume ou vagem. Os resultados eram similares tanto em pessoas que consumiam nozes de árvores ou amendoim. O que torna as nozes e amendoim tão saudáveis é que eles são ricos em fibra, magnésio e gordura poliinsaturada, que são benéficos para diminuir doenças cardíacas e níveis de colesterol. Fonte: hypescience . SIGAM-ME OS BONS ➡️ @Nandinhatw 💋
College, Memes, and E-40: Aced a
 Foucas nozes e sementes todos
 os dias ajudam a prevenir doencas
 cardiacas, cancer e outras doencas
 ACREDITRINSSOOFICI
 OACREDITANISS
@AcreditaNisso? Uma enorme análise de todos os estudos recentes sobre consumo de nozes mostra que pessoas que comem pelo menos 20g das sementes por dia têm menos riscos de doenças cardíacas, câncer e outras doenças. Esta quantidade diária de nozes – apenas um punhado – diminui em 30% as chances de doenças cardíacas, em 15% o risco de câncer e o risco de morte geral em 22%. Além disso, o consumo dessa quantia está associado à redução de 50% nos riscos de morte por doenças respiratórias e 40% menos chance de desenvolver diabetes. Esta meta-análise foi realizada por pesquisadores da Imperial College London (Inglaterra) e pela Norwegian University (Noruega), e foi publicada na revista BMC Medicine. Os pesquisadores analisaram 29 estudos publicados no mundo todo, que envolveram 819 mil participantes, sendo que 12 mil eram casos de doenças cardíacas coronárias, 9 mil de derrame, 18 mil de doenças cardiovasculares e câncer. Desses participantes, 85 mil morreram durante os longos estudos. Enquanto havia variação entre as populações estudadas, como entre homens e mulheres, pessoas vivendo em regiões diferentes ou pessoas com diferentes fatores de risco, os pesquisadores descobriram que o consumo de nozes trouxe benefício para a maioria deles. “Em estudos de nutrição a maioria da pesquisa é feita em grandes assassinos como doenças do coração, derrame e câncer, mas agora começamos e ver dados sobre outras doenças”, diz um dos autores, Dagfinn Aune. O estudo incluiu todo tipo de noz, como avelã e a noz comum. Ele também incluiu o amendoim, que na verdade é um tipo de legume ou vagem. Os resultados eram similares tanto em pessoas que consumiam nozes de árvores ou amendoim. O que torna as nozes e amendoim tão saudáveis é que eles são ricos em fibra, magnésio e gordura poliinsaturada, que são benéficos para diminuir doenças cardíacas e níveis de colesterol. Fonte: hypescience . SIGAM-ME OS BONS ➡️ @Nandinhatw 💋

@AcreditaNisso? Uma enorme análise de todos os estudos recentes sobre consumo de nozes mostra que pessoas que comem pelo menos 20g das semen...