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Tumblr, Blog, and Luck: bensklaus: Any luck finding your one-eyed man?
Tumblr, Blog, and Luck: bensklaus:
Any luck finding your one-eyed man?

bensklaus: Any luck finding your one-eyed man?

Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again… I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything… We’ve been here before. It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe.
Clothes, cnn.com, and Dumb: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die

they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again…


I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything…
We’ve been here before.
It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe.

biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weave...

Crazy, Pop, and Tumblr: LEARN RUSSIAN TO READ IN 15 MINUTES By PETER STARR NORTHROA AND RAN ESTRADA 、 ★ ESTE ANALE ABRI COMES FROM THIS CRAZY WRITING BUNCH OF ALPHABETS WHICH STOLE THEIR WRITING STYLES FROM THE GREEKS. THAT MAKES IT A KINDA WACKY AND DISJOINTED COUSIN TO OUR LATIN ALPHABET SO RUSSIAN LOOKS ALMOST KINDA LIKE IT COULD BE READ BY AN ENGLISH SPEAKER BUT THEN ALL THESE STRANGE NEW LETTERS POP IN, SO IT'S THIS ALIEN SYSTEM THAT LOOKS LIKE IT COULD BE FAMILIAR, WHICH IN THE END JUST MAKES IT SEEM ALL THE MORE ALIEN. SOME CONSONANTS LOOK THE SAME BUT MEAN TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS. AND THEN RUSSIAN ADDS IN LIKE, FIVE EXTRA VOWELS AND 3 CONSONANTS OR SOMETHING CRAZY BECAUSE OF THIS, YOU CAN'T JUST PICK UP A RUSSIAN BOOK AND START TO READ. HOWEVER, ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS LEVEL UP THROUGH THE DIFFERENT LAYERS OF RUSSIAN AND YOU CAN MAKE IT MAD EASY FOR YOURSELF THERE'S NO WEIRD SOUNDS THAT COMBINE LIKE IN ENGLISH, AND ONLY A FEW LETTERS CHANGE SOUNDS FROM TIME TO TIME. ALL THE LETTERS (EXCEPT ONE) ARE THE SAME UPPER CASE AND LOWER CASE SO YOU ONLY NEED TO LEARN EACH LETTER ONCE. ONCE YOU TEACH YOURSELF THE BASIC RULES, YOU'LL FIND THAT T MIGHT EVEN BE EASIER THAN ENGLISH STUFF THAT'S TOTALLH THE SAME SOME RUSSIAN LETTERS ARE EXACTLY THE SAME AS ENGLISH LETTERS AND THAT MAKES A GREAT STARTING POINT FOR YOU TOMKAT F THE LETTER YOU'RE LOOKING AT CAN BE FOUND IN THIS OBSOLETE CELEBRITY COUPLE PORTMANTEAU YOU'RE IN LUCK! THEYRE THE SAME AS USUAL HEADS UP THOUGH! UNLIKE IN ENGLISH, RUSSIAN VOWELS MAKE ONE SOUND CONSISTENTLY. SO THE O MAKES A LONG O SOUND, AS IN 'NO' OR 'GO' AND THE 'A' MAKES THE SOUND YOU HEAR IN 'FATHER OR 'HAHA SO THE WORD ABOVE HAS A RUSSIAN ACCENT AND SOUNDS KINDA LIKE TOME COT THEIR SOUNDS, BUT O AND A CAN GO ROGUE DEPENDING ON F THEYRE STRESSED SYLLABLES OR NOT O CAN BE "AH" LIKE FATHER) AND A CAN BE "EH (LIKE PENCIL) SO TOME COT CAN ALSO BE TAHM-KEHT FOR NOW THOUGH, JUST PRACTICE WITH TOME-COT THAT'LL HELP THE MOST LEVEL 2VOWELS IF YOU SEE SOMETHING THAT LOOKS LIKE AN ALTERED VERSION OF A VOWEL YOU RECOGNIZE, OR A BACKWARDS CONSONANT, IT'S A VOWEL YOU CAN BREAK THEM DOWN INTO TWO SIMPLE GROUPS AND SET 2, WHICH ARE JUST THE SOFT VOWELS PLUS A Y SOFT VOWELS: HARD VWELS FATHER BED YO YOU BLL THAT GUY ON THE END THERE IS THE EXCEPTION TO THE RULE INSTEAD OF MAKING A YEE SOUND, IT SOUNDS LIKE THE I IN BILL I COULD KILL BILL FOR MESSING UP THE SYSTEM. WHAT KIND OF LETTER IS MADE OF TWO LETTERS, ANYWAY? THAT JERK. EVE ALTER HOURE VOWELS THERE ARE SIX MORE VOWEL SOUNDS, AND YOU ONLY NEED TO KNOW ONE MORE LETTER TO BE ABLE TO READ THEM ADDING AFTER A VOWEL IS A LOT LIKE ADDING A Y IN ENGLISH- IT JUST MAKES THE SOUND LONGER. TO PRACTICE, LET'S ADD TO THE CONSONANTS AND VOWELS YOU ALREADY KNOW TATA TAVI TIE TO TO TOM TWEE KEY (BUT STRONGER) lolzandtrollz: Learn To Read Russian
Crazy, Pop, and Tumblr: LEARN
 RUSSIAN
 TO READ
 IN 15 MINUTES
 By PETER STARR
 NORTHROA AND
 RAN ESTRADA
 、
 ★
 ESTE ANALE ABRI COMES FROM THIS CRAZY WRITING
 BUNCH OF ALPHABETS WHICH STOLE THEIR WRITING
 STYLES FROM THE GREEKS. THAT MAKES IT A KINDA WACKY
 AND DISJOINTED COUSIN TO OUR LATIN ALPHABET
 SO RUSSIAN LOOKS ALMOST KINDA LIKE IT
 COULD BE READ BY AN ENGLISH SPEAKER BUT
 THEN ALL THESE STRANGE NEW LETTERS POP
 IN, SO IT'S THIS ALIEN SYSTEM THAT LOOKS LIKE
 IT COULD BE FAMILIAR, WHICH IN THE END
 JUST MAKES IT SEEM ALL THE MORE ALIEN.
 SOME CONSONANTS LOOK THE SAME BUT MEAN
 TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS. AND THEN
 RUSSIAN ADDS IN LIKE, FIVE EXTRA VOWELS
 AND 3 CONSONANTS OR SOMETHING CRAZY
 BECAUSE OF THIS, YOU CAN'T JUST PICK UP
 A RUSSIAN BOOK AND START TO READ.
 HOWEVER, ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS LEVEL UP
 THROUGH THE DIFFERENT LAYERS OF RUSSIAN
 AND YOU CAN MAKE IT MAD EASY FOR
 YOURSELF
 THERE'S NO WEIRD SOUNDS THAT COMBINE
 LIKE IN ENGLISH, AND ONLY A FEW LETTERS
 CHANGE SOUNDS FROM TIME TO TIME. ALL THE
 LETTERS (EXCEPT ONE) ARE THE SAME UPPER
 CASE AND LOWER CASE SO YOU ONLY NEED TO
 LEARN EACH LETTER ONCE. ONCE YOU TEACH
 YOURSELF THE BASIC RULES, YOU'LL FIND THAT
 T MIGHT EVEN BE EASIER THAN ENGLISH
 STUFF THAT'S
 TOTALLH THE SAME
 SOME RUSSIAN LETTERS
 ARE EXACTLY THE SAME
 AS ENGLISH LETTERS AND
 THAT MAKES A GREAT
 STARTING POINT FOR YOU
 TOMKAT
 F THE LETTER YOU'RE LOOKING AT CAN BE FOUND IN
 THIS OBSOLETE CELEBRITY COUPLE PORTMANTEAU
 YOU'RE IN LUCK! THEYRE THE SAME AS USUAL
 HEADS UP THOUGH! UNLIKE IN ENGLISH, RUSSIAN
 VOWELS MAKE ONE SOUND CONSISTENTLY. SO THE O
 MAKES A LONG O SOUND, AS IN 'NO' OR 'GO' AND THE 'A'
 MAKES THE SOUND YOU HEAR IN 'FATHER OR 'HAHA
 SO THE WORD ABOVE HAS A RUSSIAN ACCENT AND
 SOUNDS KINDA LIKE TOME COT
 THEIR SOUNDS, BUT O AND A CAN GO ROGUE DEPENDING ON
 F THEYRE STRESSED SYLLABLES OR NOT O CAN BE "AH"
 LIKE FATHER) AND A CAN BE "EH (LIKE PENCIL) SO TOME
 COT CAN ALSO BE TAHM-KEHT FOR NOW THOUGH, JUST
 PRACTICE WITH TOME-COT THAT'LL HELP THE MOST
 LEVEL 2VOWELS
 IF YOU SEE SOMETHING THAT LOOKS LIKE AN ALTERED VERSION OF A
 VOWEL YOU RECOGNIZE, OR A BACKWARDS CONSONANT, IT'S A VOWEL
 YOU CAN BREAK THEM DOWN
 INTO TWO SIMPLE GROUPS
 AND SET 2, WHICH ARE JUST
 THE SOFT VOWELS PLUS A Y
 SOFT VOWELS: HARD VWELS
 FATHER
 BED
 YO
 YOU
 BLL
 THAT GUY ON THE END THERE IS THE EXCEPTION TO THE RULE
 INSTEAD OF MAKING A YEE SOUND, IT SOUNDS LIKE THE I IN BILL
 I COULD KILL BILL FOR MESSING UP THE SYSTEM. WHAT KIND OF
 LETTER IS MADE OF TWO LETTERS, ANYWAY? THAT JERK.
 EVE
 ALTER HOURE
 VOWELS
 THERE ARE SIX MORE VOWEL SOUNDS, AND YOU ONLY NEED
 TO KNOW ONE MORE LETTER TO BE ABLE TO READ THEM
 ADDING AFTER A VOWEL IS A LOT LIKE ADDING A Y
 IN ENGLISH- IT JUST MAKES THE SOUND LONGER. TO
 PRACTICE, LET'S ADD TO THE CONSONANTS AND
 VOWELS YOU ALREADY KNOW
 TATA TAVI
 TIE
 TO TO TOM
 TWEE
 KEY (BUT
 STRONGER)
lolzandtrollz:

Learn To Read Russian

lolzandtrollz: Learn To Read Russian

Bailey Jay, Family, and Get Money: Cancel Your Credit Card Before You Die A lady died this past January, and the bank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00 when she died, but now somewhere around $60.00. A family member placed a call to the Bank Here is the exchange Family Member: am calling to tell you she died back in January Bank The account was never closed and the late fees and charges stil apply. Family Member : 'Maybe, you should turn it over to collections. Bank: 'Since it is two months past due, it already has been.' Family Member So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?' Bank: 'Either report her account to frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!' Family Member 'Do you think God will be mad at her?' Bank: 'Excuse me?' Family Member: 'Did you just get what I was telling you - the part about her being dead?' Bank: 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.' Supervisor gets on the phone: Family Member 'I'm calling to tell you, she died back in January with a $0 balance. Bank: 'The account was never closed and late fees and charges still apply.' Family Member from her estate?' Bank (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?' Family Member 'No, I'm her great nephew. (Lawyer info was given) Bank: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?' Family Member 'Sure. (Fax number was given) You mean you want to collect After they get the fax Bank: 'Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help. Family Member 'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. She won't care. Bank: 'Well, the late fees and charges do still apply. (What is wrong with these people?1?) Family Member: 'Would you like her new billing address?' Bank: That might help... Family Member: 'Odessa Memorial Cemetery Highway 129, Plot Number 69.' Bank: 'Sir, that's a cemetery ! Family Member: 'And what do you do with dead people on your planet? ohgoditsneph: niniblack: eudoxiav: lawful-evil-novelist: theludicrousrival: billiam-spockspeare: Capitalism will put the bill on your grave and harass your grieving family until they pay One of my cousins passed away unexpectedly at the age of 35, and had been paying back a loan from the bank. About two weeks after his death, my great aunt received a statement from the bank (his mail was being delivered to her house) about a late payment. She called the bank and explained the situation and the only thing a manager could say was “Well, that’s unfortunate. We can arrange so payments will resume in 30 days, that should be enough time to have already paid for the other arrangements.” On top of the unexpected $10,000 funeral, cremation and burial bill, my aunt had to finish paying my uncle’s $5,000 loan. She’s a disabled retiree, on a fixed income, and could barely afford to pay for her insulin for diabetes. She nearly lost her home of more than 40 years. Fuck the system. She didn’t need to pay. When people die, their debts are not their family’s responsibility. In fact, it is outright illegal to try and collect those debts from a person who didn’t cosign the loan and isn’t executing the will. Debts and Deceased Relatives Here’s a link to the detail on that one. Banks count on people not knowing that last comment so that they can still get money They really do. My great-grandmother had her identity stolen before she died at the age of 93, and thousands of charges were racked up on credit cards in her name. After she passed away, they called my mother to try and collect. My mom laughed at them, and told them: “She’s dead, good luck collecting.” The credit card asked my mother, “Don’t you want to clear your grandmother’s debts? Don’t you want to clear her good name?” My mom laughed at them again. “No,” she said. “Because a 90 year old wasn’t watching porn with those credit cards, and her name is fine. Don’t give credit cards to old women likely to pass away soon. This is on you.” Which is how I learned as a young child to always question collection agents, and to never pay off debts that aren’t your own. They often can’t even collect that money from the estate, if there is one, depending on how you write your will and what kind of account the money was kept in. DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. If a loved one of yours dies and bill collectors (credit cards, loans, etc etc) start calling you off the hook and request that you pay off their debts, tell them in no uncertain terms to go fuck themselves. The reason being is that the moment you give them a single penny, that debt is now on YOU because you’ve now agreed to pay it off. Do not agree to pay off their debt. Do not pass go, do not give them $200.
Bailey Jay, Family, and Get Money: Cancel Your Credit Card Before
 You Die
 A lady died this past January, and the bank billed
 her for February and March for their annual service
 charges on her credit card, and added late fees and
 interest on the monthly charge. The balance had
 been $0.00 when she died, but now somewhere
 around $60.00. A family member placed a call to
 the Bank

 Here is the exchange
 Family Member: am calling to tell you she died
 back in January
 Bank The account was never closed and the late
 fees and charges stil apply.
 Family Member : 'Maybe, you should turn it over to
 collections.
 Bank: 'Since it is two months past due, it already
 has been.'
 Family Member So, what will they do when they
 find out she is dead?'
 Bank: 'Either report her account to frauds division
 or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!'
 Family Member 'Do you think God will be mad at
 her?'
 Bank: 'Excuse me?'

 Family Member: 'Did you just get what I was
 telling you -
 the part about her being dead?'
 Bank: 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'
 Supervisor gets on the phone:
 Family Member 'I'm calling to tell you, she died
 back in January with a $0 balance.
 Bank: 'The account was never closed and late fees
 and charges still apply.'
 Family Member
 from her estate?'
 Bank (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?'
 Family Member 'No, I'm her great nephew.
 (Lawyer info was given)
 Bank: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?'
 Family Member 'Sure. (Fax number was given)
 You mean you want to collect

 After they get the fax
 Bank: 'Our system just isn't setup for death.
 I don't know what more I can do to help.
 Family Member 'Well, if you figure it out, great!
 If not, you could just keep billing her. She won't
 care.
 Bank: 'Well, the late fees and charges do still
 apply.
 (What is wrong with these people?1?)
 Family Member: 'Would you like her new billing
 address?'
 Bank: That might help...
 Family Member: 'Odessa Memorial Cemetery
 Highway 129, Plot Number 69.'
 Bank: 'Sir, that's a cemetery !
 Family Member: 'And what do you do with dead
 people on your planet?
ohgoditsneph:

niniblack:

eudoxiav:


lawful-evil-novelist:

theludicrousrival:


billiam-spockspeare:
Capitalism will put the bill on your grave and harass your grieving family until they pay

One of my cousins passed away unexpectedly at the age of 35, and had been paying back a loan from the bank. About two weeks after his death, my great aunt received a statement from the bank (his mail was being delivered to her house) about a late payment. She called the bank and explained the situation and the only thing a manager could say was “Well, that’s unfortunate. We can arrange so payments will resume in 30 days, that should be enough time to have already paid for the other arrangements.” 
On top of the unexpected $10,000 funeral, cremation and burial bill, my aunt had to finish paying my uncle’s $5,000 loan. She’s a disabled retiree, on a fixed income, and could barely afford to pay for her insulin for diabetes. She nearly lost her home of more than 40 years. Fuck the system. 


She didn’t need to pay.  When people die, their debts are not their family’s responsibility.
In fact, it is outright illegal to try and collect those debts from a person who didn’t cosign the loan and isn’t executing the will.
Debts and Deceased Relatives
Here’s a link to the detail on that one.


Banks count on people not knowing that last comment so that they can still get money


They really do. 
My great-grandmother had her identity stolen before she died at the age of 93, and thousands of charges were racked up on credit cards in her name. After she passed away, they called my mother to try and collect. My mom laughed at them, and told them: “She’s dead, good luck collecting.” The credit card asked my mother, “Don’t you want to clear your grandmother’s debts? Don’t you want to clear her good name?” My mom laughed at them again. “No,” she said. “Because a 90 year old wasn’t watching porn with those credit cards, and her name is fine. Don’t give credit cards to old women likely to pass away soon. This is on you.”
Which is how I learned as a young child to always question collection agents, and to never pay off debts that aren’t your own. They often can’t even collect that money from the estate, if there is one, depending on how you write your will and what kind of account the money was kept in. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN.

If a loved one of yours dies and bill collectors (credit cards, loans, etc etc) start calling you off the hook and request that you pay off their debts, tell them in no uncertain terms to go fuck themselves.
The reason being is that the moment you give them a single penny, that debt is now on YOU because you’ve now agreed to pay it off.

Do not agree to pay off their debt. Do not pass go, do not give them $200.

ohgoditsneph: niniblack: eudoxiav: lawful-evil-novelist: theludicrousrival: billiam-spockspeare: Capitalism will put the bill on your...