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Tumblr, Blog, and Ever After: KA sircumference: in which Huntara and Hot Bartender Lady get their happily ever after
Tumblr, Blog, and Ever After: KA
sircumference:

in which Huntara and Hot Bartender Lady get their happily ever after

sircumference: in which Huntara and Hot Bartender Lady get their happily ever after

Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED of only they taught beauty class like this Best description of sugar scrub ever.
Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders
 ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN
 SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR
 NOTEPAD
 THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW
 YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I
 KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE
 FUCKERS
 YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT
 YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN
 THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM
 TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A
 NEWBORN
 sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND
 SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND
 MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART
 OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL
 BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO
 SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL
 THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR
 MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU
 WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM
 SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
 NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED
 PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE
 BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND
 SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS
 VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE
 NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND
 SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A
 HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER
 THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near
 your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really
 important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way
 its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR
 HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS
 WORKING
 NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU
 HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN
 EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN
 BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF
 BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
 GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT
 WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF
 YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS
 CLASS DISMISSED
 of only they taught beauty class like this
Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales What has been your worst "nice guy" experience? So, possibly one of the coolest things I've ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the "women want him, men want to *be* him" stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway! I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at the time, and behind us are a couple on a not going well. Guy was being I rather inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't look at all comfortable. The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly my guess is she wanted to get it over with. Guy proceeds to comment on it and says "well, least I know you can swallow right?" Loudly Girl goes red and tells him that isn't appropriate, he literally waves his hand in a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm down I was going to find out in a few hours anyway" I missed her exact re as she moved to a hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this. He responded with "sweetheart I picked lost the colour in her face and said nothing. No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get involved" type of people and there is no way I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that motherfucker through a wall. I may have had a slight temper in my youth. But anyway. I was halfway out of my chair when a hand came down on my shoulder and I look up to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my current plan amounted to "stab him in the neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's not the best idea, I sit down. He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it around and sits down with the couple. Then.. he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in his face Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my daughters birthday with my family when I distinctly hear you threaten this young lady, would you care to explain yourself?" Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see. Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing, so right now I'm deciding if I want to have some of my buddies come pick you up" Guy: "oh no well that..." Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's dinner, so how about you hand me your ID, me, the dn't want yhe staff here and settle your bill., the full bill now, this young lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first option, I'll leave it up to you. Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the direction of the counter Cop: while writing down the guys details 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not intruding it just seemed like you could use some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want to pursue this further I'll have some of the boys pick him up on his way home, we can definitely take this further. Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here". Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to comforting father figure in about half a second* "Well I'm here with my daughter, she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to finish your meal with us? We can run you home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd prefer to call someone else?" Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou so much! *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop* Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have back.". my Cop: "There you go. now I have your details right here so I *highly* recommend you don't go near or contact this young lady ever again. Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!" The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the qirl went and sat with the cop and his family and by the time we left they were still sitting around talking and laughing about random crap. It was hands down the best way I have ever seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That cop is my hero. malicemanaged Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his life. Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT
Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales
 What has been your worst
 "nice guy" experience?
 So, possibly one of the coolest things I've
 ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the
 "women want him, men want to *be* him"
 stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by
 *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway!
 I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at
 the time, and behind us are a couple on a
 not going well. Guy was being
 I
 rather
 inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't
 look at all comfortable.
 The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly
 my guess is she wanted to get it over with.
 Guy proceeds to comment on it and says
 "well, least I know you can swallow right?"
 Loudly
 Girl goes red and tells him that isn't
 appropriate, he literally waves his hand in
 a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm
 down I was going to find out in a few hours
 anyway"
 I missed her exact re
 as she moved to a
 hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what
 was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this.
 He responded with "sweetheart I picked
 lost the
 colour in her face and said nothing.
 No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get
 involved" type of people and there is no way
 I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get
 up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but
 I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that
 motherfucker through a wall. I may have had
 a slight temper in my youth. But anyway.
 I was halfway out of my chair when a hand
 came down on my shoulder and I look up
 to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says
 "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total
 confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my
 current plan amounted to "stab him in the
 neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's
 not the best idea, I sit down.
 He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it
 around and sits down with the couple. Then..
 he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the
 table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in
 his face
 Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my
 daughters birthday with my family when I
 distinctly hear you threaten this young lady,
 would you care to explain yourself?"
 Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see.
 Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we
 take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing,
 so right now I'm deciding if I want to have
 some of my buddies come pick you up"
 Guy: "oh no well that..."
 Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's
 dinner, so how about you hand me your ID,
 me, the dn't want yhe staff here and
 settle your bill., the full bill now, this young
 lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your
 poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first
 option, I'll leave it up to you.
 Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands
 over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the
 direction of the counter
 Cop: while writing down the guys details
 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not
 intruding it just seemed like you could use
 some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want
 to pursue this further I'll have some of the
 boys pick him up on his way home, we can
 definitely take this further.
 Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run
 out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here".
 Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to
 comforting father figure in about half a
 second* "Well I'm here with my daughter,
 she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to
 finish your meal with us? We can run you
 home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd
 prefer to call someone else?"
 Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou
 so much!
 *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop*
 Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have
 back.".
 my
 Cop: "There you go. now I have your details
 right here so I *highly* recommend you
 don't go near or contact this young lady ever
 again.
 Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!"
 The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the
 qirl went and sat with the cop and his family
 and by the time we left they were still sitting
 around talking and laughing about random
 crap.
 It was hands down the best way I have ever
 seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That
 cop is my hero.
 malicemanaged
 Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his
 life.
Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT

Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT

Bitch, Click, and Dating: guiltlessdeviant: aaliyahbreaux: big-mood-energy: aaliyahbreaux: girldont: flyandfamousblackgirls: drdrunkpigeon-phd: abstractandedgyname: libertarirynn: paradise-dream222: flyandfamousblackgirls: Shae Scott: “This is why I don’t date ugly guys..” I’ve dated an ugly guy before and he was just a WASTE of my time. He didn’t get cocky, but he should’ve been a lil more appreciative of me. Seeing that no other girl would even look at him before I did. Holy fuck y’all are conceited. Those men are dodging bullets. Hey, my boyfriend may not be conventionally attractive or the most attractive in the world but it’s almost as if when your personalities really click they become so attractive to you! But obviously, yall can’t do that as you need a personality to begin with. This bitch fully is under the impression that she should date an attractive boring guy rather than an ugly boring guy, as if looks are the only defining things in relationships. How about, date an ugly [fun, interesting, caring, sex god] guy vs a hot [boring, simple, arrogant, sexually incompetent] guy. Maybe all the ugly you’ve dated have been ugly on the inside too, must be if they date such a wretched creature as yourself, but news flash lady! Everyone is different for fuck sake !!!! So when guys say women are too tall, too dark, too fat, hair not long enough, hair too “nappy”, her teeth, because she has tattoos or weave, because she wears makeup or they don’t wanna date her because she’s trans….Thats ok. But women are obligated to accept any man as he is? Interesting…yall are proving her point. Imagine openly saying you don’t find your SO physically attractive, that’s embarrassing for yourself and the person you’re with. studies show no matter how old men get typically they are most attracted to women in their twenties whereas women are most attracted to men around their age. and yet, women are seen as being superficial and shallow for just wanting to be with someone attractive… yes, basing whether or not you date somebody on their looks is shallow. it’s the definition of shallow, in fact. shallow is dating some entirely for their looks. dating someone you find attractive is just how attration works Ugly. You need to be attracted to the person you date. That’s just logic. Don’t settle for someone you’re not attracted to. The issue here is not just saying “you should someone you find attractive”, the issue is saying “don’t date ugly guys” as though that’s some sort of objective classification and acting like you’re literally better than people because you’re more physically attractive and they should be thanking the gods if you even grace them with your presence. That’s the conceited bullshit. Also for most people attraction has to be more than physical. Physical can be a part of it but there are plenty of hot assholes.
Bitch, Click, and Dating: guiltlessdeviant:

aaliyahbreaux:


big-mood-energy:


aaliyahbreaux:


girldont:


flyandfamousblackgirls:

drdrunkpigeon-phd:


abstractandedgyname:


libertarirynn:

paradise-dream222:

flyandfamousblackgirls:

Shae Scott: “This is why I don’t date ugly guys..”

I’ve dated an ugly guy before and he was just a WASTE of my time. He didn’t get cocky, but he should’ve been a lil more appreciative of me. Seeing that no other girl would even look at him before I did. 

Holy fuck y’all are conceited. Those men are dodging bullets.



Hey, my boyfriend may not be conventionally attractive or the most attractive in the world but it’s almost as if when your personalities really click they become so attractive to you! But obviously, yall can’t do that as you need a personality to begin with.
This bitch fully is under the impression that she should date an attractive boring guy rather than an ugly boring guy, as if looks are the only defining things in relationships. How about, date an ugly [fun, interesting, caring, sex god] guy vs a hot [boring, simple, arrogant, sexually incompetent] guy.
Maybe all the ugly you’ve dated have been ugly on the inside too, must be if they date such a wretched creature as yourself, but news flash lady! Everyone is different for fuck sake !!!!


So when guys say women are too tall, too dark, too fat, hair not long enough, hair too “nappy”, her teeth, because she has tattoos or weave, because she wears makeup or they don’t wanna date her because she’s trans….Thats ok. But women are obligated to accept any man as he is? Interesting…yall are proving her point.

Imagine openly saying you don’t find your SO physically attractive, that’s embarrassing for yourself and the person you’re with.


studies show no matter how old men get typically they are most attracted to women in their twenties whereas women are most attracted to men around their age. and yet, women are seen as being superficial and shallow for just wanting to be with someone attractive…


yes, basing whether or not you date somebody on their looks is shallow.
it’s the definition of shallow, in fact.


shallow is dating some entirely for their looks. dating someone you find attractive is just how attration works Ugly. 


You need to be attracted to the person you date. That’s just logic. Don’t settle for someone you’re not attracted to.

The issue here is not just saying “you should someone you find attractive”, the issue is saying “don’t date ugly guys” as though that’s some sort of objective classification and acting like you’re literally better than people because you’re more physically attractive and they should be thanking the gods if you even grace them with your presence. That’s the conceited bullshit. Also for most people attraction has to be more than physical. Physical can be a part of it but there are plenty of hot assholes.

guiltlessdeviant: aaliyahbreaux: big-mood-energy: aaliyahbreaux: girldont: flyandfamousblackgirls: drdrunkpigeon-phd: abstractan...

Bitch, Click, and God: flyandfamousblackgirls: drdrunkpigeon-phd: abstractandedgyname: libertarirynn: paradise-dream222: flyandfamousblackgirls: Shae Scott: “This is why I don’t date ugly guys..” I’ve dated an ugly guy before and he was just a WASTE of my time. He didn’t get cocky, but he should’ve been a lil more appreciative of me. Seeing that no other girl would even look at him before I did. Holy fuck y’all are conceited. Those men are dodging bullets. Hey, my boyfriend may not be conventionally attractive or the most attractive in the world but it’s almost as if when your personalities really click they become so attractive to you! But obviously, yall can’t do that as you need a personality to begin with.This bitch fully is under the impression that she should date an attractive boring guy rather than an ugly boring guy, as if looks are the only defining things in relationships. How about, date an ugly [fun, interesting, caring, sex god] guy vs a hot [boring, simple, arrogant, sexually incompetent] guy.Maybe all the ugly you’ve dated have been ugly on the inside too, must be if they date such a wretched creature as yourself, but news flash lady! Everyone is different for fuck sake !!!! So when guys say women are too tall, too dark, too fat, hair not long enough, hair too “nappy”, her teeth, because she has tattoos or weave, because she wears makeup or they don’t wanna date her because she’s trans….Thats ok. But women are obligated to accept any man as he is? Interesting…yall are proving her point. Who the absolute fuck said any of that shit in this thread?
Bitch, Click, and God: flyandfamousblackgirls:

drdrunkpigeon-phd:

abstractandedgyname:

libertarirynn:

paradise-dream222:

flyandfamousblackgirls:

Shae Scott: “This is why I don’t date ugly guys..”

I’ve dated an ugly guy before and he was just a WASTE of my time. He didn’t get cocky, but he should’ve been a lil more appreciative of me. Seeing that no other girl would even look at him before I did. 

Holy fuck y’all are conceited. Those men are dodging bullets.



Hey, my boyfriend may not be conventionally attractive or the most attractive in the world but it’s almost as if when your personalities really click they become so attractive to you! But obviously, yall can’t do that as you need a personality to begin with.This bitch fully is under the impression that she should date an attractive boring guy rather than an ugly boring guy, as if looks are the only defining things in relationships. How about, date an ugly [fun, interesting, caring, sex god] guy vs a hot [boring, simple, arrogant, sexually incompetent] guy.Maybe all the ugly you’ve dated have been ugly on the inside too, must be if they date such a wretched creature as yourself, but news flash lady! Everyone is different for fuck sake !!!!

So when guys say women are too tall, too dark, too fat, hair not long enough, hair too “nappy”, her teeth, because she has tattoos or weave, because she wears makeup or they don’t wanna date her because she’s trans….Thats ok. But women are obligated to accept any man as he is? Interesting…yall are proving her point.

Who the absolute fuck said any of that shit in this thread?

flyandfamousblackgirls: drdrunkpigeon-phd: abstractandedgyname: libertarirynn: paradise-dream222: flyandfamousblackgirls: Shae Scott: ...