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key: ballet-royale: midnight-spectrum-again: thesaltofcarthage: festivefeathers: safifonhasstrel: bundibird: jehovahhthickness: biggest-gaudiest-fish: lipsredasroses: mayothefirst: madamehearthwitch: thegrimmlovely: riskpig: endangeredslug: riskpig: teamseabreeze: recycled-soul: skywritingg: iloveyournudity: cuntsoloud-ishere: pizzaforpresident: This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!! This goes for assholes, too, guys. I know a couple who went tubing once, and they had to re-air their tubes, but the guy thought it would be funny to stick the tip of the air compressor up to her bikini trunks, the air ruptured something inside her and she died within thirty minutes. WHAT? The thing about this? It’s in every pregnancy book I’ve read. WHAT????? Why is it in pregnancy books but not sex ed books? Because the men in charge only care about the health and safety of women in so far as it enables them to have babies. https://www.healthline.com/health/air-embolism#outlook Reblogging with a link because I thought this was a legit joke. Never heard it before. Like I knew you could kill a person by inserting air into a vein but still. WHAT THE FUCL I hate how I didn’t learn this in sex Ed AT ALL This is very true lol Yo what the f u c k not the normal stuff i’d reblog but, uh, this is kinda??? heckin???? important????? I feel like I first saw this in The Joy of Sex, but it’s definitely a thing. What the fuck I’m ace but here you guys go
key: ballet-royale:
midnight-spectrum-again:

thesaltofcarthage:

festivefeathers:

safifonhasstrel:

bundibird:

jehovahhthickness:

biggest-gaudiest-fish:


lipsredasroses:

mayothefirst:


madamehearthwitch:

thegrimmlovely:

riskpig:

endangeredslug:

riskpig:

teamseabreeze:

recycled-soul:

skywritingg:

iloveyournudity:

cuntsoloud-ishere:

pizzaforpresident:

This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!!




This goes for assholes, too, guys. I know a couple who went tubing once, and they had to re-air their tubes, but the guy thought it would be funny to stick the tip of the air compressor up to her bikini trunks, the air ruptured something inside her and she died within thirty minutes.


WHAT?

The thing about this? It’s in every pregnancy book I’ve read.

WHAT?????


Why is it in pregnancy books but not sex ed books?

Because the men in charge only care about the health and safety of women in so far as it enables them to have babies.

https://www.healthline.com/health/air-embolism#outlook


Reblogging with a link because I thought this was a legit joke. Never heard it before. Like I knew you could kill a person by inserting air into a vein but still. 


WHAT THE FUCL I hate how I didn’t learn this in sex Ed AT ALL


This is very true lol 


Yo what the f u c k 






not the normal stuff i’d reblog but, uh, this is kinda??? heckin???? important????? 

I feel like I first saw this in The Joy of Sex, but it’s definitely a thing.



What the fuck



I’m ace but here you guys go

ballet-royale: midnight-spectrum-again: thesaltofcarthage: festivefeathers: safifonhasstrel: bundibird: jehovahhthickness: biggest-...

key: he-is-a-geode-made-of-dude:
key: he-is-a-geode-made-of-dude:

he-is-a-geode-made-of-dude:

key: e-lodicolo:
key: e-lodicolo:

e-lodicolo:

key: myuuzaki: foxxxylove: homiedepot: gay-irl: gay🚛irl OOP He deleted his account 💀 Omg
key: myuuzaki:

foxxxylove:

homiedepot:


gay-irl:

gay🚛irl


OOP



He deleted his account 💀

Omg

myuuzaki: foxxxylove: homiedepot: gay-irl: gay🚛irl OOP He deleted his account 💀 Omg

key: liliemsharpe: Yes and YES!!!
key: liliemsharpe:
Yes and YES!!!

liliemsharpe: Yes and YES!!!

key: liliemsharpe: Yes and YES!!!
key: liliemsharpe:
Yes and YES!!!

liliemsharpe: Yes and YES!!!

key: no-place-for-strange-birds: pieceofcandycorn: acitybythelightunited: …you have too much time on your …HANDS. what compelled you to do this Humans have been compelled to do this for thousands of years
key: no-place-for-strange-birds:

pieceofcandycorn:


acitybythelightunited:
…you have too much time on your …HANDS.
what compelled you to do this



Humans have been compelled to do this for thousands of years

no-place-for-strange-birds: pieceofcandycorn: acitybythelightunited: …you have too much time on your …HANDS. what compelled you to do...

key: cishits:
key: cishits:

cishits:

key: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me
key: chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me

chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me

key: thesassycat: thesassycat: thesassycat: they’re called violently high fruits and vegs I changed them up and made them into stickers i put them on my Etsy!!!
key: thesassycat:
thesassycat:

thesassycat:

they’re called violently high fruits and vegs


I changed them up and made them into stickers 

i put them on my Etsy!!!

thesassycat: thesassycat: thesassycat: they’re called violently high fruits and vegs I changed them up and made them into stickers...

key: lords-of-dawn: @randomnightlord @lords-of-dawnFor a moment i thought you wanted to contribute to my food fanfiction series.
key: lords-of-dawn:

@randomnightlord


@lords-of-dawnFor a moment i thought you wanted to contribute to my food fanfiction series.

lords-of-dawn: @randomnightlord @lords-of-dawnFor a moment i thought you wanted to contribute to my food fanfiction series.

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: itsthevioletqueen: probablyasocialecologist: probablyasocialecologist:
key: itsthevioletqueen:
probablyasocialecologist:

probablyasocialecologist:

itsthevioletqueen: probablyasocialecologist: probablyasocialecologist:

key: jockgirlfriend: atop-the-citadel:
key: jockgirlfriend:

atop-the-citadel:

jockgirlfriend: atop-the-citadel:

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: stumacherstan: 404-soulnotfound: cricketcat9: deaf-grapes: jamesfactscalvin: ultrafacts: Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts Chaotic Good The honour of thieves Wholesome!
key: stumacherstan:

404-soulnotfound:
cricketcat9:

deaf-grapes:

jamesfactscalvin:

ultrafacts:

Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts


Chaotic Good

The honour of thieves




Wholesome!

stumacherstan: 404-soulnotfound: cricketcat9: deaf-grapes: jamesfactscalvin: ultrafacts: Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts C...

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you
key: wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you

wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and get...

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me Don’t worry about it is me 🙃
key: getsohighbreathemeinlikeair:
chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me



Don’t worry about it is me 🙃

getsohighbreathemeinlikeair: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted...

key: yeehaw-vampire:
key: yeehaw-vampire:

yeehaw-vampire:

key: dontforgettospeak: wickedwonderlandd: trinikelly1984: morgrimmoon: letsmcflytobritain: deminat-20: smiling-grouch: ocean-again: loueejii: facelesssavior: twitblr: Dormant Predators This is why I have this. Even if they can get the lock opened they can’t push the door open. Got it at Lowes for $20. reblog for that last bit to save a life If you’re like me and have a large gap under your front door (someone could take a stick and just poke the leaning stick style door jam out), I recommend the Addalock. It’s small, perfect for traveling, and this lock is CRAZY. It’s so simple but the door does not move. You can’t see it from the other side, either. It also cost about $20, and I can’t recommend it enough. Easy to travel with, too! Great for Air BnBs! That’s why I have these on my doors. They get drilled into the side and once its flipped over the door nothing is getting it open. Not the door being unlocked nothing, I’ve unlocked the door and pulled and pushed as hard as I could and it didn’t budge. When I go on a trip this is what I use and when I’m home I leave it on too. No one is getting in here. Okay I know that it is necessary for many but what do you do if you need medical attention and you’re not able to open the door from the inside? Can the fire department get through these at least?   Yes. The fire department can and will break down your door if necessary, it’s one of the reasons they have axes; it’s entirely possible for door frames to melt/expand/seize or otherwise become unopenable during a house fire but the door itself can be hacked down. Or the window. In rare cases, the wall. Firefighters don’t fuck around with collateral damage when lives are at stake. Sharing for all the safety items!! This is horrifying that these things are even necessary. Reblog to save a frickin life I’ve got the addalock one from above (plus a bar for my sliding door and additional window locks) and it gives me serious piece of mind.
key: dontforgettospeak:

wickedwonderlandd:

trinikelly1984:

morgrimmoon:

letsmcflytobritain:

deminat-20:

smiling-grouch:


ocean-again:

loueejii:

facelesssavior:

twitblr:

Dormant Predators



This is why I have this. Even if they can get the lock opened they can’t push the door open. Got it at Lowes for $20. 

reblog for that last bit to save a life


If you’re like me and have a large gap under your front door (someone could take a stick and just poke the leaning stick style door jam out), I recommend the Addalock. It’s small, perfect for traveling, and this lock is CRAZY. It’s so simple but the door does not move. 
You can’t see it from the other side, either. It also cost about $20, and I can’t recommend it enough. Easy to travel with, too! Great for Air BnBs!




That’s why I have these on my doors. They get drilled into the side and once its flipped over the door nothing is getting it open. Not the door being unlocked nothing, I’ve unlocked the door and pulled and pushed as hard as I could and it didn’t budge. When I go on a trip this is what I use and when I’m home I leave it on too. No one is getting in here.

Okay I know that it is necessary for many but what do you do if you need medical attention and you’re not able to open the door from the inside? Can the fire department get through these at least?  

Yes. The fire department can and will break down your door if necessary, it’s one of the reasons they have axes; it’s entirely possible for door frames to melt/expand/seize or otherwise become unopenable during a house fire but the door itself can be hacked down. Or the window. In rare cases, the wall. Firefighters don’t fuck around with collateral damage when lives are at stake.



Sharing for all the safety items!! 



This is horrifying that these things are even necessary. Reblog to save a frickin life

I’ve got the addalock one from above (plus a bar for my sliding door and additional window locks) and it gives me serious piece of mind.

dontforgettospeak: wickedwonderlandd: trinikelly1984: morgrimmoon: letsmcflytobritain: deminat-20: smiling-grouch: ocean-again:...

key: 1v1-me-irl: boycomics: true romance Just so y'all know, there’s more lol
key: 1v1-me-irl:
boycomics:
true romance

Just so y'all know, there’s more lol

1v1-me-irl: boycomics: true romance Just so y'all know, there’s more lol

key: chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me
key: chrinic-geadcake:

hugtheteadrinkthekitten:

gebothebardbarian:


anxietyproblem:
Instagram
i feel targeted






Oh god it’s me

chrinic-geadcake: hugtheteadrinkthekitten: gebothebardbarian: anxietyproblem: Instagram i feel targeted Oh god it’s me

key: furbyhater: artissijam: callmedaddy-42: HERE’S THE DUCKS. you missed the best part 
key: furbyhater:
artissijam:

callmedaddy-42:



HERE’S THE DUCKS.

you missed the best part 

furbyhater: artissijam: callmedaddy-42: HERE’S THE DUCKS. you missed the best part