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Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures u/Oceanundertow Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him I am the dumb dumb mister. positive-memes:Bed time stories
Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures u/Oceanundertow Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him I am the dumb dumb mister. positive-memes:Bed time stories

positive-memes:Bed time stories

Bad, Batman, and Joker: Thread Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Batman movies and then asked it to write a Batman movie of its own. Here is the first page. BATHAN INT. TRADITIONAL BATCAVE BATMAN stands next to his batmobile and uses hia batcomputer. He'e sometimes Bruce Wayne sometimes Batman. Alltimes orphan BATMAN This is now a safe city. I have punched a penguin into prison ALFRED, Batman's loyal batler, carries a tray of goth ham ALFRED Eat a dinner, Mattress Wayne. An explosion explodes. THE JOKER and TWo-FACE enter the cave Joker is a clown but insane. Two-Face is a man but attorney. BATMAN No! It is Two-Face and One-Face They hate me for being a bat Batman throws Alfred at Two-Face. Two-Face flips Alfred like a coin. Alfred lands heade up which mean8 Two-Face goes home. BATMAN (CONT 'D) It is just you and I, the Joker Bat versus clown. Moral enemies THE JOKER I am such a freak. Society is bad You drink water, I drink anarchy BATMAN I drink bats just like a bat would! Batman looks around for his parents, but they are still dead This makes him have anger. He fires a batrocket. The Joker deflects it with his sick sense of humor. A clownly power. THE JOKER I have never followed a rule. That is my rule. Do you follow? I don't BATMAN Alfred, give birth to Robin Alfred begins the process since it is his job. The Joker now has a present in his hand. He juggles it over to Batman THE JOKER Happy batday, Birthman Batman opens the present since he's a coupon for new parents, but is expired. This is a Joker joke. good guy. It contains a meirl
Bad, Batman, and Joker: Thread Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Batman movies and then asked it to write a Batman movie of its own. Here is the first page. BATHAN INT. TRADITIONAL BATCAVE BATMAN stands next to his batmobile and uses hia batcomputer. He'e sometimes Bruce Wayne sometimes Batman. Alltimes orphan BATMAN This is now a safe city. I have punched a penguin into prison ALFRED, Batman's loyal batler, carries a tray of goth ham ALFRED Eat a dinner, Mattress Wayne. An explosion explodes. THE JOKER and TWo-FACE enter the cave Joker is a clown but insane. Two-Face is a man but attorney. BATMAN No! It is Two-Face and One-Face They hate me for being a bat Batman throws Alfred at Two-Face. Two-Face flips Alfred like a coin. Alfred lands heade up which mean8 Two-Face goes home. BATMAN (CONT 'D) It is just you and I, the Joker Bat versus clown. Moral enemies THE JOKER I am such a freak. Society is bad You drink water, I drink anarchy BATMAN I drink bats just like a bat would! Batman looks around for his parents, but they are still dead This makes him have anger. He fires a batrocket. The Joker deflects it with his sick sense of humor. A clownly power. THE JOKER I have never followed a rule. That is my rule. Do you follow? I don't BATMAN Alfred, give birth to Robin Alfred begins the process since it is his job. The Joker now has a present in his hand. He juggles it over to Batman THE JOKER Happy batday, Birthman Batman opens the present since he's a coupon for new parents, but is expired. This is a Joker joke. good guy. It contains a meirl

meirl