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Being Alone, Condom, and Confused: Brie @meowmeowmeow07 When I was 17 years old, I had a boyfriend. The second time we ever had sex, he poked a hole into his condom behind my back. This resulted in my pregnancy I was 17 years old. I was terrified. After a store bought pregnancy test showed I was positive I went to my boyfriends 1:41 PM May 15, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 156K Likes 88.7K Retweets Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 Replying to @meowmeowmeow07 screamed with glee and told me that he had intentionally gotten me pregnant so he could "lock me in" because he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I was confused & scared. I didn't know how to act. I was 17 years old. My friend urged me to go to a women's clinic (2) 1.4K 16.3K Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 to make sure. Little did we know that this women's clinic" was owned by Christians. They proceeded to tell me that if I killed my baby, l would be a murderer, and murderers go to hell. l was 17 years old My friend took my hand and dragged me out of that clinic (3) 7 1.2K Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 In order for me to get the procedure as a 17 year old without parental consent, I had to go in front of a judge who would grant me my rights to an abortion as long as I wasn't using it as a means for birth control. I was granted my rights, Itook the day off of school and my(4) 1.1 14.8K Brie * @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 friend drove me to the abortion clinic. This procedure took all of 5 minutes. There was no baby to remove and dismantle. There wasn't even a fetus. It was an embryo that took 5 minutes and no blood shed to remove I went home and through confusion, a lot of tears and pure (5) 1.7K 19.7K Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 support from my friend, I tried to continue on with my 17 year old life. Shortly after T had time to think about what had actually happened, broke up with him. He proceeded to pull a knife on me, but he cut his wrists instead He said if he can't have me, he doesn't want (6) 15.8K 5 1.1K Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 to live. I was 17 years old. My parents who found out about my abortion and what he had done to me banned hi m from my house. For 10 years after, he stalked me. He showed up at my work He knew how to get my new cell phone number l constantly had to change because of him. (7) 15.9K 1.2K 6 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 It was only when the police arrested him for stalking that he left me alone. I thank God everyday that I don't have his child. That he wasn't allowed to "lock me in." He is a psychopath and I would hate myself if I had brought an actual living and breathing child into this (8) 1.7K 8 23.4K Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 world with him as their father, I believe he would have killed us l've never spoken on this publicly. It has caused me pain and embarrassment, but if my story helps one person out there, then that means more to me than my pain. This is bigger than l am. (9) 1.3K 20.6K Brie * @meowmeowmeow07 May 15 To the girls and women in Ohio, Georgia and Alabama and more states to come, I am with you. I will never stop fighting for your rights as a HUMAN. Stay strong and never be ashamed of who you are and what you do with your own body. (10) 221 58.4k 7.7K thatpettyblackgirl: This is so powerful.
Being Alone, Condom, and Confused: Brie
 @meowmeowmeow07
 When I was 17 years old, I had a
 boyfriend. The second time we ever
 had sex, he poked a hole into his
 condom behind my back. This
 resulted in my pregnancy
 I was 17 years old. I was terrified. After
 a store bought pregnancy test showed
 I was positive I went to my boyfriends
 1:41 PM May 15, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 156K Likes
 88.7K Retweets

 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 Replying to @meowmeowmeow07
 screamed with glee and told me that he had
 intentionally gotten me pregnant so he could
 "lock me in" because he wanted to spend the
 rest of his life with me.
 I was confused & scared. I didn't know how to
 act. I was 17 years old. My friend urged me to go
 to a women's clinic (2)
 1.4K
 16.3K
 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 to make sure. Little did we know that this
 women's clinic" was owned by Christians. They
 proceeded to tell me that if I killed my baby, l
 would be a murderer, and murderers go to hell. l
 was 17 years old
 My friend took my hand and dragged me out of
 that clinic (3)
 7
 1.2K
 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 In order for me to get the procedure as a 17 year
 old without parental consent, I had to go in front
 of a judge who would grant me my rights to an
 abortion as long as I wasn't using it as a means
 for birth control. I was granted my rights,
 Itook the day off of school and my(4)
 1.1
 14.8K

 Brie * @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 friend drove me to the abortion clinic. This
 procedure took all of 5 minutes. There was no
 baby to remove and dismantle. There wasn't
 even a fetus. It was an embryo that took 5
 minutes and no blood shed to remove
 I went home and through confusion, a lot of
 tears and pure (5)
 1.7K
 19.7K
 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 support from my friend, I tried to continue on
 with my 17 year old life. Shortly after T had time
 to think about what had actually happened,
 broke up with him. He proceeded to pull a knife
 on me, but he cut his wrists instead
 He said if he can't have me, he doesn't want (6)
 15.8K
 5
 1.1K
 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 to live. I was 17 years old. My parents who found
 out about my abortion and what he had done to
 me banned hi
 m from my house. For 10 years
 after, he stalked me. He showed up at my work
 He knew how to get my new cell phone number
 l constantly had to change because of him. (7)
 15.9K
 1.2K
 6

 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 It was only when the police arrested him for
 stalking that he left me alone. I thank God
 everyday that I don't have his child. That he
 wasn't allowed to "lock me in." He is a
 psychopath and I would hate myself if I had
 brought an actual living and breathing child into
 this (8)
 1.7K
 8
 23.4K
 Brie @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 world with him as their father, I believe he would
 have killed us
 l've never spoken on this publicly. It has caused
 me pain and embarrassment, but if my story
 helps one person out there, then that means
 more to me than my pain. This is bigger than l
 am. (9)
 1.3K
 20.6K
 Brie * @meowmeowmeow07 May 15
 To the girls and women in Ohio, Georgia and
 Alabama and more states to come, I am with
 you. I will never stop fighting for your rights as a
 HUMAN. Stay strong and never be ashamed of
 who you are and what you do with your own
 body. (10)
 221
 58.4k
 7.7K
thatpettyblackgirl:

This is so powerful.

thatpettyblackgirl: This is so powerful.

Best Friend, Confused, and Dad: MAMMA, EVER SINCE I SAlV I'M ITALIAN, EVERYONE KEEP4 TEA IN ME AND AGKING IF I'M IN THE MAFIA NEXT TIME TELL THEM THEN THEY WILL FEAK YOU. 2srooky: giancarlovolpe: Based on a true story. this reminds me of a story that’s kind of an ongoing joke in my family.  I’m half German, and my father’s side of the family is full blooded German. My father owns a business that deals with a lot of international calls, and during my early tween years he got a lot of business calls at all hours of the day and night from all over the world.  Now, when i first met my best friends, I had them sleeping over at my house, and we were watching TV. Every few minutes the phone would ring, and our caller ID would project at the top of the television screen.  I was bullied a lot as a kid, so my dad told me to tell people if they asked what my father did, that he was in the German Mafia. So, naturally when my friends asked who was calling, I made the joke it was business cause my dad was in the German Mafia, and the joke stuck.  And it spread, too. Middle school was filled with jokes about my family and the mafia, but they were just jokes. That I was in the mafia, my dad was a mafia boss, etc. etc. Those jokes continued into high school, where, in my junior year I was in a big depressive spell. I wore my hair tied back from my face a lot, and in my history class, these jokes were cracked a little more often as we began our European Studies. One day, my History teacher, the most amazing teacher I had in high school, walked between me and my best friend, as our desks were right next to each other, while we had been making one of these jokes.  He paused, and reached out, tapping my right temple twice while a huge, cheeky grin spread on his face and he just went.  “Good to see you finished your induction.” and walked away. I was confused, my best friend and I were staring at each other for a solid ten minutes before we got back to work.  When I went home that night, I looked up a bunch of stuff about the German Mafia. The German Mafia would often do a tattoo of 3 dots on someone once they had finished their “trials” and were accepted. This was most often done in cases of murder, and other crimes. Where the tattoos were placed meant different things. Hands were the norm, but sometimes a tattoo would be placed on the face.  These tattoos are now mostly outdated, and are usually just prison tattoos done for years/crimes committed in prison, but some branches of Russian, Cuban, and German mafias still use the three dot tattoos.  I was flabbergasted for two reasons. One, that my teacher knew all of this about the German mafia, and, Two, that he pointed out the three freckles on my temple that make a perfect triangle.  For the rest of my Junior and Senior year, the mafia jokes dwindled less and less, because people actually believed I was in the mafia.  I never told them I wasn’t, either.
Best Friend, Confused, and Dad: MAMMA, EVER SINCE
 I SAlV I'M ITALIAN,
 EVERYONE KEEP4
 TEA IN ME AND
 AGKING IF I'M IN THE
 MAFIA

 NEXT TIME
 TELL THEM

 THEN THEY
 WILL FEAK
 YOU.
2srooky:

giancarlovolpe:

Based on a true story.

this reminds me of a story that’s kind of an ongoing joke in my family. 
I’m half German, and my father’s side of the family is full blooded German. My father owns a business that deals with a lot of international calls, and during my early tween years he got a lot of business calls at all hours of the day and night from all over the world. 
Now, when i first met my best friends, I had them sleeping over at my house, and we were watching TV. Every few minutes the phone would ring, and our caller ID would project at the top of the television screen. 
I was bullied a lot as a kid, so my dad told me to tell people if they asked what my father did, that he was in the German Mafia.
So, naturally when my friends asked who was calling, I made the joke it was business cause my dad was in the German Mafia, and the joke stuck. 
And it spread, too. Middle school was filled with jokes about my family and the mafia, but they were just jokes. That I was in the mafia, my dad was a mafia boss, etc. etc.
Those jokes continued into high school, where, in my junior year I was in a big depressive spell. I wore my hair tied back from my face a lot, and in my history class, these jokes were cracked a little more often as we began our European Studies. One day, my History teacher, the most amazing teacher I had in high school, walked between me and my best friend, as our desks were right next to each other, while we had been making one of these jokes. 
He paused, and reached out, tapping my right temple twice while a huge, cheeky grin spread on his face and he just went. 
“Good to see you finished your induction.” and walked away.
I was confused, my best friend and I were staring at each other for a solid ten minutes before we got back to work. 
When I went home that night, I looked up a bunch of stuff about the German Mafia. The German Mafia would often do a tattoo of 3 dots on someone once they had finished their “trials” and were accepted. This was most often done in cases of murder, and other crimes. Where the tattoos were placed meant different things. Hands were the norm, but sometimes a tattoo would be placed on the face. 
These tattoos are now mostly outdated, and are usually just prison tattoos done for years/crimes committed in prison, but some branches of Russian, Cuban, and German mafias still use the three dot tattoos. 
I was flabbergasted for two reasons. One, that my teacher knew all of this about the German mafia, and, Two, that he pointed out the three freckles on my temple that make a perfect triangle. 
For the rest of my Junior and Senior year, the mafia jokes dwindled less and less, because people actually believed I was in the mafia. 
I never told them I wasn’t, either.

2srooky: giancarlovolpe: Based on a true story. this reminds me of a story that’s kind of an ongoing joke in my family.  I’m half German,...

Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so l just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back. I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask. Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and I feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was stil extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught. I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that), but that's not the point Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crushl And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!" My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" biggest-gaudiest-patronuses damn right we did Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the
 boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to
 school and it was missing, so l just sat on the
 floor and read my book until the teacher came
 in and made them put it back.
 I realize now they were trying to trick me
 into go into the boys bathroom, but no one
 actually told me that's where my desk was,
 and it didn't occur to me to ask.
 Looking back I realize they had to make the
 effort to get to school early to move it, and I
 feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more
 biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse
 set in for show in tell. the ball went missing
 during class time and at the end of the day
 we all had to check our bookbags to look for
 it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to
 go home), but that evening I found it at the
 bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being
 blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and
 never told anyone
 I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke
 put it there to frame me, and he was stil
 extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught.
 I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball
 feral-renaissance-cat
 I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten
 and made NO attempts to hide it because the
 people on TV were always telling each other
 when they liked each other. Didn't work as well
 as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy
 wanted to hang out with me ever after that),
 but that's not the point
 Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid
 who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me
 if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crushl
 And?" Dude turns around and yells to my
 crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!"
 My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I
 know. Everyone knows. Thanks."
 So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in
 front of everyone but it completely backfired
 because I lack the social filter necessary to
 feel
 ashamed of my base desires
 darkhumourandfandoms
 One time in like kindergerden some kid stole
 my shoe and instead if reacting I just went
 the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it
 He got bored of no reaction and just dropped
 the shoe but by then I was too committed and
 continued to walk around barefoot
 lycant-guy22
 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of
 "fucks given"
 biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 damn right we did
 Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and I feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more. -biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone. I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was still extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught. I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball. feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that), but that's not the point. Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I havea crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush]. And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires. darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot. lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" The Zero Fucks Given crowd
Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys
 bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it
 was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my
 book until the teacher came in and made them put it
 back
 I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into
 the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me
 that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me
 to ask
 Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to
 get to school early to move it, and I feel a tiny bit of
 regret for not reacting more.
 -biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in
 for show in tell. the ball went missing during class
 time and at the end of the day we all had to check
 our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I
 just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it
 at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being
 blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never
 told anyone.
 I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it
 there to frame me, and he was still extremely
 frustrated I hadn't gotten caught.
 I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball.
 feral-renaissance-cat
 I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and
 made NO attempts to hide it because the people on
 TV were always telling each other when they liked
 each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't
 work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me
 ever after that), but that's not the point.
 Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who
 was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I havea
 crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush]. And?" Dude turns
 around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush
 on you
 My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know.
 Everyone knows. Thanks."
 So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of
 everyone but it completely backfired because I lack
 the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my
 base desires.
 darkhumourandfandoms
 One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my
 shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day
 barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no
 reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was
 too committed and continued to walk around
 barefoot.
 lycant-guy22
 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks
 given"
The Zero Fucks Given crowd

The Zero Fucks Given crowd

Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to school and it was missing, so I just sat on the floor and read my book until the teacher came in and made them put it back. I realize now they were trying to trick me into go into the boys bathroom, but no one actually told me that's where my desk was, and it didn't occur to me to ask Looking back I realize they had to make the effort to get to school early to move it, and l feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more biggest-gaudiest-patronuse:s In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse set in for show in tell. the ball went missing during class time and at the end of the day we all had to check our bookbags to look for it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to go home), but that evening I found it at the bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and never told anyone I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke put it there to frame me, and he was still extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball. feral-renaissance-cat I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten and made NO attempts to hide it because the people on TV were always telling each other when they liked each other. Didn't work as well as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy wanted to hang out with me ever after that) but that's not the point Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush] And?" Dude turns around and yells to my crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!" My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I know. Everyone knows. Thanks." So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in front of everyone but it completely backfired because I lack the social filter necessary to feel ashamed of my base desires darkhumourandfandoms One time in like kindergerden some kid stole my shoe and instead if reacting I just went the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it. He got bored of no reaction and just dropped the shoe but by then I was too committed and continued to walk around barefoot lycant-guy22 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of "fucks given" biggest-gaudiest-patronuses damn right we did Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses No fucks given
Bored, Confused, and Crush: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 In 5th grade some boys hid my desk in the
 boys bathroom. I was confused when I got to
 school and it was missing, so I just sat on the
 floor and read my book until the teacher came
 in and made them put it back.
 I realize now they were trying to trick me
 into go into the boys bathroom, but no one
 actually told me that's where my desk was,
 and it didn't occur to me to ask
 Looking back I realize they had to make the
 effort to get to school early to move it, and l
 feel a tiny bit of regret for not reacting more
 biggest-gaudiest-patronuse:s
 In 3rd grade Richard brought his new lacrosse
 set in for show in tell. the ball went missing
 during class time and at the end of the day
 we all had to check our bookbags to look for
 it. I only glanced in mine (I just wanted to
 go home), but that evening I found it at the
 bottom of my bag. I was so scared of being
 blamed, I threw it into the neighbor's yard and
 never told anyone
 I found out 2 years later that my bully Luke
 put it there to frame me, and he was still
 extremely frustrated I hadn't gotten caught
 I'm pretty sure Richard got a new ball.
 feral-renaissance-cat
 I had a crush on a boy I met in Kindergarten
 and made NO attempts to hide it because the
 people on TV were always telling each other
 when they liked each other. Didn't work as well
 as I'd hope (i.e. didn't work AT ALL and no boy
 wanted to hang out with me ever after that)
 but that's not the point
 Skip ahead to third grade. We had a new kid
 who was kind of a jerk. One day he asks me
 if I have a crush and I'm like, "Yeah, [Crush]
 And?" Dude turns around and yells to my
 crush "Hey! She has a crush on you!"
 My crush just kinda sighs and is like, "Yeah. I
 know. Everyone knows. Thanks."
 So this guy was hoping to embarrass me in
 front of everyone but it completely backfired
 because I lack the social filter necessary to
 feel ashamed of my base desires
 darkhumourandfandoms
 One time in like kindergerden some kid stole
 my shoe and instead if reacting I just went
 the whole day barefoot. No one questioned it.
 He got bored of no reaction and just dropped
 the shoe but by then I was too committed and
 continued to walk around barefoot
 lycant-guy22
 Some of yall grew up with a low base stat of
 "fucks given"
 biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
 damn right we did
 Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses
No fucks given

No fucks given

Advice, Confused, and Disappointed: alexaloraetheris: Reasons I believe my friend is secretly some kind of deity 1) First time we spoke was a week after the beggining of freshman year she summed up my entire character and most of the events of my life Sherlock style. I asked her how the hell she knew all that. She just shrugged and said she figured out our entire class already 1 2) The one time we had religion class instead of ethics she listened to the teacher for a few minutes, laughed and told me "Humans have wished to be gods so much they've forgotten they have to ability to create them. Imagination has truly suffered from this monotheism stuff." I was confused and asked her if she was an atheist. She rolled her eyes and said Oh I believe in god alright. I just don't think the bastard deserves to be worshipped." 3) Out of nowhere she gave me this advice The only truth a liar ever told was that lies weren't going to save you. Don't become the liar who has to pass that wisdom on, because they speak from experience 4) To this day, she has one of those old-timey phones with buttons she only uses to ocassionally call someone. When I asked her why she never got a smartphone she got pouty: "I hate social media. On Facebook they talk a lot but never say anything. If I wanted to listen to people moan about their problems and ask for help they don't expect l'd listen to their prayers." (Notice the choice of words) 5) I noticed she was stiff and I offered her a massage since I'm really good at it but when i started kneading her back I swear to this day those were not muscles I felt. I asked her what she did to turn her muscles into rocks covered with a thin layer of skin and she kinda froze then shrugged and said she was just really, really stiff. My hands hurt after ten minutes when I can usually go for an hour. Next time I offered she seemed surprised and laughed. She still has rocks for muscles 6) We were having a debate over the way neural pathways are formed (I study biology and she forensics) and I jokingly asked if I could have her brain for study when she dies. She laughed Sure, if you find a way to kill me you can have it. I'm actually curious what you're gonna find." 7) One time she was tired and miserable and I tried to comfort her. We both have really dark sense of humor so I told her she could scare the dead out of their graves with that glare. She told me the dead can't come back and I rolled my eyes and said 'obviously' but she continued When you die you descend to the underworld with nothing to lose. To keep you, they give you something to lose. When you want to return, they will demand it back. That's why nobody ever leaves. The only way out is to never enter." 8) One day she just came up to me with a disappointed look on her face When I asked her what was wrong she was quiet for a few seconds and then just told me "Betrayals committed in good intentions are still damning. Just... keep that in mind." Then she left and didn't speak to me for three days. I still don't know what she meant but even three years later I haven't forgotten it. 9) We were casually sitting on a bench when, out of nowhere, she asked me Is it just me or have humans gotten dumber? Or have they always been this stupid and I just haven't been paying attention?" 10) She asked me if I ever wondered what it was like to die. I said no but told her I would tell her when I found out. I meant it as a ghost joke but she smiled at me and said Great. I'll wait for you to come back. Maybe you'll even remember me In conclusion, she is some kind of low-key god and she lost her faith in humanity even before we lost our faith in her but she's stuck with us because immortality is a bitclh P.S. I just remembered her name is a variation on 'Eve'. Maybe l should reconsider my atheist status?! What if God was one of us?
Advice, Confused, and Disappointed: alexaloraetheris:
 Reasons I believe my friend is secretly some kind of deity
 1) First time we spoke was a week after the beggining of freshman year she
 summed up my entire character and most of the events of my life Sherlock
 style. I asked her how the hell she knew all that. She just shrugged and said
 she figured out our entire class already
 1
 2) The one time we had religion class instead of ethics she listened to the
 teacher for a few minutes, laughed and told me
 "Humans have wished to be gods so much they've forgotten they have to
 ability to create them. Imagination has truly suffered from this monotheism
 stuff."
 I was confused and asked her if she was an atheist. She rolled her eyes and
 said
 Oh I believe in god alright. I just don't think the bastard deserves to be
 worshipped."
 3) Out of nowhere she gave me this advice
 The only truth a liar ever told was that lies weren't going to save you. Don't
 become the liar who has to pass that wisdom on, because they speak from
 experience
 4) To this day, she has one of those old-timey phones with buttons she only
 uses to ocassionally call someone. When I asked her why she never got a
 smartphone she got pouty:
 "I hate social media. On Facebook they talk a lot but never say anything. If I
 wanted to listen to people moan about their problems and ask for help they
 don't expect l'd listen to their prayers." (Notice the choice of words)
 5) I noticed she was stiff and I offered her a massage since I'm really good at
 it but when i started kneading her back I swear to this day those were not
 muscles I felt. I asked her what she did to turn her muscles into rocks
 covered with a thin layer of skin and she kinda froze then shrugged and said
 she was just really, really stiff. My hands hurt after ten minutes when I can
 usually go for an hour. Next time I offered she seemed surprised and
 laughed. She still has rocks for muscles
 6) We were having a debate over the way neural pathways are formed (I
 study biology and she forensics) and I jokingly asked if I could have her brain
 for study when she dies. She laughed
 Sure, if you find a way to kill me you can have it. I'm actually curious what
 you're gonna find."
 7) One time she was tired and miserable and I tried to comfort her. We both
 have really dark sense of humor so I told her she could scare the dead out of
 their graves with that glare. She told me the dead can't come back and I
 rolled my eyes and said 'obviously' but she continued
 When you die you descend to the underworld with nothing to lose. To keep
 you, they give you something to lose. When you want to return, they will
 demand it back. That's why nobody ever leaves. The only way out is to never
 enter."
 8) One day she just came up to me with a disappointed look on her face
 When I asked her what was wrong she was quiet for a few seconds and then
 just told me
 "Betrayals committed in good intentions are still damning. Just... keep that in
 mind." Then she left and didn't speak to me for three days. I still don't know
 what she meant but even three years later I haven't forgotten it.
 9) We were casually sitting on a bench when, out of nowhere, she asked me
 Is it just me or have humans gotten dumber? Or have they always been this
 stupid and I just haven't been paying attention?"
 10) She asked me if I ever wondered what it was like to die. I said no but told
 her I would tell her when I found out. I meant it as a ghost joke but she smiled
 at me and said
 Great. I'll wait for you to come back. Maybe you'll even remember me
 In conclusion, she is some kind of low-key god and she lost her faith in
 humanity even before we lost our faith in her but she's stuck with us because
 immortality is a bitclh
 P.S. I just remembered her name is a variation on 'Eve'. Maybe l should
 reconsider my atheist status?!
What if God was one of us?

What if God was one of us?