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Funny, Ken, and Sorry: Jastinder Khera @KheraJas My German isn't perfect yet but l think this means... they are not taking us entirely seriously Die Presse DONNERSTAG, 29 NOVEMBER 201 EUROPAIS Der Brexit als Monty-Python-Sketch rur das Land vorteilhaft sei -ihr eigener Finanz nien/EU. Premierministerin Theresa May besteht darauf, dass ihr Austrittsdeal minister behauptet zeitgleich das Gegenteil. VON MICHAEL LACZYNSKI werden können. Philip Hammond sprach Neuwahlen bis hin zu einem zwetten Brexit kırz vor Mays Auftritt im Unterhaus das Of- Referendum oder einem Chaos-Breat am gebe keine Brexit-Vari 29. März 2019. Insolerm ist es nicht verwun- Das innenpolitische Gezerre in fensichtliche aus: Es i Großbritannien um den EU-Austritt nimmt ante, die sich für immer absurdere Züge an. Der gestrige Auf lich tritt von Premierministerin Theresa May im die EU-Mit Unterhaus erinnerte phasenweise an den Sc berühmten Sketch der britischen Komiker- truppe Monty Python, bei dem der Verkäu n wirtschaft derlich, dass man sich in London auch Ge danken über eine Unterbre- chung des Countdowns Gedan ken macht. Diese Obertegun gen beschäftigen auch den EuGH. Die Höchstrichtert der mehr rentieren würde als sagte der r in cinem BBC-In- terview Der Regierungschefin steht fer EU müssen sich derzelt mit In einer Tierhandlung einen misstraul: nun eine Frage befassen, ob Großbritan schen Kunden davon überzeugen will, der Sie muss die durchwegs skepti von ihm erstandene ausgestopfte Papagei schen sei nicht tot, sondern mache lediglich ein überzeugen, am 11. Dezember Mittagsschläfchen. Der von ihr ausgehan- für das Austrittsabkommen zu delte Brexit-Deal werde das Land wohlha stimmen. Sisyphos deshalb, Schatzkanzler nien auf eigene Faust aus der im Artikel 50 des EU-Vertra geregelten zweijährigen A trittsprozess aussteigen ka bender machen, beteuerte May während weil so gut wie alle Beobachter Philip Hammond Nein, argumentieren die wälte von EU-K davon ausgehen, dass May bei die Experten ihrer Regierung zur selben Zeit das genaue Gegenteil behaupteten. dem bevorstehenden Votum im Unterhaus Rat denn sonst könnte der Artikel 50 Nach einem Mittwochmittag veröffent- eine Niederlage kassieren wird. Was dann Erpressung der restlichen Unionsmitg missbraucht werden. Der EuGH-Gene lichten Regierungsbericht wird der EU-Aus passieren wird, ist völlig offen walt wird sein Gutachten zu der Cau Die Bandbreite der S en reicht t u den von der Regierungschefin v ungen in Brüssel über 4. Dezember vorlegen. 29/11/2018, 07:44 1,306 Retweets 3,272 Likes literallyaria: langernameohnebedeutung: enraged-fangirl-and-co: The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either Sorry guys I’m not saying there is a common theme here, but… I just want to add that the spanish one specifically states that brexit is like a monty python sketch, but less funny
Funny, Ken, and Sorry: Jastinder Khera
 @KheraJas
 My German isn't perfect yet but l think
 this means... they are not taking us
 entirely seriously
 Die Presse DONNERSTAG, 29 NOVEMBER 201
 EUROPAIS
 Der Brexit als Monty-Python-Sketch
 rur das Land vorteilhaft sei -ihr eigener Finanz
 nien/EU. Premierministerin Theresa May besteht darauf, dass ihr Austrittsdeal
 minister behauptet zeitgleich das Gegenteil.
 VON MICHAEL LACZYNSKI
 werden können. Philip Hammond sprach Neuwahlen bis hin zu einem zwetten Brexit
 kırz vor Mays Auftritt im Unterhaus das Of- Referendum oder einem Chaos-Breat am
 gebe keine Brexit-Vari 29. März 2019. Insolerm ist es nicht verwun-
 Das
 innenpolitische Gezerre in fensichtliche aus: Es
 i
 Großbritannien um den EU-Austritt nimmt ante, die sich für
 immer absurdere Züge an. Der gestrige Auf lich
 tritt von Premierministerin Theresa May im die EU-Mit
 Unterhaus erinnerte phasenweise an den Sc
 berühmten Sketch der britischen Komiker-
 truppe Monty Python, bei dem der Verkäu
 n wirtschaft derlich, dass man sich in London auch Ge
 danken über eine Unterbre-
 chung des Countdowns Gedan
 ken macht. Diese Obertegun
 gen beschäftigen auch den
 EuGH. Die Höchstrichtert der
 mehr rentieren würde als
 sagte der
 r in cinem BBC-In-
 terview
 Der Regierungschefin steht
 fer
 EU müssen sich derzelt mit
 In einer Tierhandlung einen misstraul:
 nun eine
 Frage befassen, ob Großbritan
 schen Kunden davon überzeugen will, der Sie muss die durchwegs skepti
 von ihm erstandene ausgestopfte Papagei schen
 sei nicht tot, sondern mache lediglich ein überzeugen, am 11. Dezember
 Mittagsschläfchen. Der von ihr ausgehan- für das Austrittsabkommen zu
 delte Brexit-Deal werde das Land wohlha stimmen. Sisyphos deshalb, Schatzkanzler
 nien auf eigene Faust aus der
 im Artikel 50 des EU-Vertra
 geregelten zweijährigen A
 trittsprozess aussteigen ka
 bender machen, beteuerte May während weil so gut wie alle Beobachter Philip Hammond Nein, argumentieren die
 wälte von EU-K
 davon ausgehen, dass May bei
 die Experten ihrer Regierung zur selben Zeit
 das genaue Gegenteil behaupteten.
 dem bevorstehenden Votum im Unterhaus Rat denn sonst könnte der Artikel 50
 Nach einem Mittwochmittag veröffent- eine Niederlage kassieren wird. Was dann Erpressung der restlichen Unionsmitg
 missbraucht werden. Der EuGH-Gene
 lichten Regierungsbericht wird der EU-Aus passieren wird, ist völlig offen
 walt wird sein Gutachten zu der Cau
 Die Bandbreite der S
 en reicht
 t u den von der Regierungschefin v
 ungen in Brüssel über 4. Dezember vorlegen.
 29/11/2018, 07:44
 1,306 Retweets 3,272 Likes
literallyaria:
langernameohnebedeutung:

enraged-fangirl-and-co:

The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either
Sorry guys

I’m not saying there is a common theme here, but…


I just want to add that the spanish one specifically states that brexit is like a monty python sketch, but less funny

literallyaria: langernameohnebedeutung: enraged-fangirl-and-co: The Dutch don’t take the English very seriously either Sorry guys I’m not...

Aww, Beautiful, and Cute: 2:50 1 ull LTE Today 10:32 AM This is such a weird thing to do. Don't take it as an insult. It's a big compliment actually. I really liked you a lot and I think you are really cute and sweet and funny. So I want to set you up with my good friend if you would be ok with that. I just think you two would have more in common than we do. She likes heavy metal music and she's a nerd and she's shy and beautiful and funny. She's religious though and that's a deal breaker for her if you aren't religious. So two questions, would you want to meet her? And are you religious? Today 11:18 AM I'm super flattered, but l'm very much not religious and totally respect that being a deal breaker. As curious as l'd be to meet her, since that is a deal breaker it's a moot point! I also enjoyed our date last night, you seem like an interesting and attractive woman. But I think there was just a certain chemistry missing, and l'd like to give you the opportunity to find a guy who's a better match for you. Hahaha You're so wonderful! Omg. I'm going to talk to my friend. The entire date I was thinking that you are perfect for her. You two have the same energy. Ugh. Yeah. Religion is a deal breaker for her. You are so nice though! That is the absolute sweetest way anyone has ever turned me down. I wish I had more single female friends to set you up with because you are so sweet and awesome. I would give you 5 stars if I could rate you on here. Hahaha. Sent Aww, you're too sweet. The feeling is mutual. I absolutely wish you and your friend the best of luck with navigating the buffet of guys you both undoubtedly have as options. Like I said, you seem like an amazing girl, just maybe not the amazing girl for me! Send Type a message GIF Stitch It! The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down
Aww, Beautiful, and Cute: 2:50 1
 ull LTE
 Today 10:32 AM
 This is such a weird thing to do. Don't
 take it as an insult. It's a big
 compliment actually. I really liked you a
 lot and I think you are really cute and
 sweet and funny. So I want to set you
 up with my good friend if you would be
 ok with that. I just think you two would
 have more in common than we do. She
 likes heavy metal music and she's a
 nerd and she's shy and beautiful and
 funny.
 She's religious though and that's a deal
 breaker for her if you aren't religious.
 So two questions, would you want to
 meet her? And are you religious?
 Today 11:18 AM
 I'm super flattered, but l'm very much
 not religious and totally respect that
 being a deal breaker.
 As curious as l'd be to meet her, since
 that is a deal breaker it's a moot point!
 I also enjoyed our date last night, you
 seem like an interesting and attractive
 woman. But I think there was just a
 certain chemistry missing, and l'd like
 to give you the opportunity to find a
 guy who's a better match for you.
 Hahaha
 You're so wonderful! Omg. I'm going to
 talk to my friend. The entire date I was
 thinking that you are perfect for her.
 You two have the same energy.
 Ugh. Yeah. Religion is a deal breaker
 for her. You are so nice though! That is
 the absolute sweetest way anyone has
 ever turned me down. I wish I had more
 single female friends to set you up with
 because you are so sweet and
 awesome.
 I would give you 5 stars if I could rate
 you on here. Hahaha.
 Sent
 Aww, you're too sweet. The feeling is
 mutual. I absolutely wish you and your
 friend the best of luck with navigating
 the buffet of guys you both
 undoubtedly have as options. Like I
 said, you seem like an amazing girl, just
 maybe not the amazing girl for me!
 Send
 Type a message
 GIF
 Stitch It!
The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down

The most wholesome way that I have ever been turned down

Life, School, and Shower: just-shower-thoughts Blind people must save a lot on electricity. stomatium They do actually! mauve-moth I had a blind professor, last semester, and I swung through his office to make up an exam. It was a while before I knew he was in there because he was sitting with the lights off. I finally went in, apologized, and took the exam by the light of a nearby window (which was fine). Forty-five minutes into dead silence he panicked and yelled in this booming voiced, "WAIT, YOU CAN SEE!!" before diving across his desk to turn on the lights. I'm sure he was embarrassed but I thought it was endearing and it highlighted a large aspect of disabled life that I hadn't previously considered. hotmolasses Sort of relatedly I once had professor who was deaf, but she had learned to read lips and speak so she could communicate easily with hearing people who didn't know sign language. One day she had gotten off topic and was talking a little about her personal life, so that one of the students said "Oh, I know, I grew up in Brooklyn too." She stared at him for a long time and then said "How do you know l'm from Brooklyn?" And he said "You have a Brooklyn accent." She said "I do?" and the whole class nodded, and then she burst out laughing and said "I had no idea! The school where I learned to speak was in Brooklyn. I learned by moving my mouth and tongue the way my teachers did. So I guess it makes sense that I have their accent, I just never thought about it." Realising perspectives!
Life, School, and Shower: just-shower-thoughts
 Blind people must save a lot on electricity.
 stomatium
 They do actually!
 mauve-moth
 I had a blind professor, last semester, and I swung
 through his office to make up an exam. It was a while
 before I knew he was in there because he was sitting
 with the lights off. I finally went in, apologized, and
 took the exam by the light of a nearby window (which
 was fine). Forty-five minutes into dead silence he
 panicked and yelled in this booming voiced, "WAIT,
 YOU CAN SEE!!" before diving across his desk to
 turn on the lights. I'm sure he was embarrassed but I
 thought it was endearing and it highlighted a large
 aspect of disabled life that I hadn't previously
 considered.
 hotmolasses
 Sort of relatedly I once had professor who was deaf,
 but she had learned to read lips and speak so she
 could communicate easily with hearing people who
 didn't know sign language. One day she had gotten
 off topic and was talking a little about her personal
 life, so that one of the students said "Oh, I know, I
 grew up in Brooklyn too."
 She stared at him for a long time and then said "How
 do you know l'm from Brooklyn?"
 And he said "You have a Brooklyn accent."
 She said "I do?" and the whole class nodded, and
 then she burst out laughing and said "I had no idea!
 The school where I learned to speak was in Brooklyn.
 I learned by moving my mouth and tongue the way
 my teachers did. So I guess it makes sense that I
 have their accent, I just never thought about it."
Realising perspectives!

Realising perspectives!

Club, Tumblr, and Blog: laughoutloud-club: I just ordered my new Tesla motorcycle…
Club, Tumblr, and Blog: laughoutloud-club:

I just ordered my new Tesla motorcycle…

laughoutloud-club: I just ordered my new Tesla motorcycle…

Bad, Facts, and Friends: jelloapocalypse S eternal-savvy-blog Follow sixpenceee These swimming pools with black tiles are my aesthetic. gabriel-patches-titanfeather Make the black tiles out of that black material that absorbs all light and swim over the void. ract facts-i-just-made-up Fun fact about Vantablack- Because it absorbs all light, it heats up very fast. If exposed to direct sunlight, it takes in all the UV and heat and contains them, and can reach heats well over 212°F, the boiling point of water. So if you did coat the pool in that material, the water would boil as soon as the sun touched it, killing everyone swimming in it. But that's not all. The flash boiling of an entire pool of chlorinated water would release the chlorine as gas, which would kill everyone within a 200ft radius of the pool. And it doesn't end there. The release of chlorine gas combined with the heat of the black tiles would be more than sufficient to fuse the boiled hydrogen ions with the chlorine, creating an explosive reaction with the nitrogen in the air. So shortly after everyone in the pool boils and everyone around the pool dies of chlorine gas poisoning, the region would explode with the force of a small atomic bomb (8kt for a pool like those pictured above), leveling about 50 city blocks. You'd think that would be bad enough, but get this- Such chemical explosions expel gamma rays. Gamma rays ionize hematite, which is the mineral from which the black material mentioned is made. This creates Scopohyoscpnol, a compound known as "The Zombie Drug" because it essentially erases the brain and induces cannibalistic tendencies in its victim. It can be transmitted through saliva, infecting all who are bitten within hours. So basically, if you did have Vantablack tiles in your pool, you would boil your friends, poison your neighbors, nuke your city, and condemn the globe to a zombie plague. But to be fair, it would look pretty cool. - meltinggoldanddippingthingsinit This is really well-done. I skipped over the username and kept believing even as it got ridiculous. Source: sixpenceee 260,387 notes ifunny.ce This is amazing, just don’t read the username first.
Bad, Facts, and Friends: jelloapocalypse
 S eternal-savvy-blog Follow
 sixpenceee
 These swimming pools with black tiles are my aesthetic.
 gabriel-patches-titanfeather
 Make the black tiles out of that black material that absorbs all
 light and swim over the void.
 ract facts-i-just-made-up
 Fun fact about Vantablack- Because it absorbs all light, it heats
 up very fast. If exposed to direct sunlight, it takes in all the UV
 and heat and contains them, and can reach heats well over
 212°F, the boiling point of water. So if you did coat the pool in
 that material, the water would boil as soon as the sun touched it,
 killing everyone swimming in it.
 But that's not all. The flash boiling of an entire pool of
 chlorinated water would release the chlorine as gas, which would
 kill everyone within a 200ft radius of the pool. And it doesn't end
 there.
 The release of chlorine gas combined with the heat of the black
 tiles would be more than sufficient to fuse the boiled hydrogen
 ions with the chlorine, creating an explosive reaction with the
 nitrogen in the air. So shortly after everyone in the pool boils
 and everyone around the pool dies of chlorine gas poisoning,
 the region would explode with the force of a small atomic bomb
 (8kt for a pool like those pictured above), leveling about 50 city
 blocks.
 You'd think that would be bad enough, but get this-
 Such chemical explosions expel gamma rays. Gamma rays ionize
 hematite, which is the mineral from which the black material
 mentioned is made. This creates Scopohyoscpnol, a compound
 known as "The Zombie Drug" because it essentially erases the
 brain and induces cannibalistic tendencies in its victim. It can
 be transmitted through saliva, infecting all who are bitten within
 hours.
 So basically, if you did have Vantablack tiles in your pool, you
 would boil your friends, poison your neighbors, nuke your city,
 and condemn the globe to a zombie plague. But to be fair, it
 would look pretty cool.
 - meltinggoldanddippingthingsinit
 This is really well-done. I skipped over the username and kept
 believing even as it got ridiculous.
 Source: sixpenceee
 260,387 notes
 ifunny.ce
This is amazing, just don’t read the username first.

This is amazing, just don’t read the username first.