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House: intimatum:David Mitchell, Slade House
House: intimatum:David Mitchell, Slade House

intimatum:David Mitchell, Slade House

House: I also choose Will Smith’s house
House: I also choose Will Smith’s house

I also choose Will Smith’s house

House: I also choose Will Smith’s house
House: I also choose Will Smith’s house

I also choose Will Smith’s house

House: I also choose Will Smith’s house
House: I also choose Will Smith’s house

I also choose Will Smith’s house

House: walk into my buddy’s house and this is the first thing I see
House: walk into my buddy’s house and this is the first thing I see

walk into my buddy’s house and this is the first thing I see

House: Not the Waffle House!!
House: Not the Waffle House!!

Not the Waffle House!!

House: Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…
House: Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…

Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…

House: Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…
House: Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…

Reminder: Frisk your relatives before they leave your house.. they might be stealing toilet paper…

House: Reason why you can’t turn a hoe into a house wife #1738
House: Reason why you can’t turn a hoe into a house wife #1738

Reason why you can’t turn a hoe into a house wife #1738

House: surreelust:God in the House by Jiří Hauschka (2016)
House: surreelust:God in the House by Jiří Hauschka (2016)

surreelust:God in the House by Jiří Hauschka (2016)

House: our house in the middle of the street
House: our house in the middle of the street

our house in the middle of the street

House: Plz gib House
House: Plz gib House

Plz gib House

House: House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤 (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)
House: House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤 (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)

House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤 (via /r/BlackPeopleTwitter)

House: House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤
House: House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤

House of SARS in this building!!! 😤😤

House: Neighbors house got TP’d last night and now it’s listed on Zillow for $12.5 million.
House: Neighbors house got TP’d last night and now it’s listed on Zillow for $12.5 million.

Neighbors house got TP’d last night and now it’s listed on Zillow for $12.5 million.

House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.
House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.
House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.
House: My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

My dog isn’t used to me being home during the day and is just staring at me from different places around the house.

House: This house ain’t big enough for the six of us
House: This house ain’t big enough for the six of us

This house ain’t big enough for the six of us

House: House is gone tho
House: House is gone tho

House is gone tho

House: My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.
House: My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.

My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.

House: My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.
House: My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.

My neighbor told me that my house looks like it’s made out of olives and now I can’t unsee it.

House: prismatic-bell: the-invisible-self: pulmonary-poultry: the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99: mandalorianreynolds: kuriquinn: prismatic-bell: the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99: prismatic-bell: broken-bits-of-dreams: prismatic-bell: aiko-mori-hates-pedos: artbymoga: Throwback to all these Jesus comics I drew in 2012… Good post OP Good post, OP, and if you ever decide to do another may I please suggest “NOT IN HEBREW IT DOESN’T” as a punchline? So much of the Old Testament is HORRIFICALLY translated from the Tanakh, it drives me batty. WAIT WAIT WHAT DOES IT SAY?????? I NEED TO LIKE,, DESTROY MI MUM FOR BEING REALLY HOMOPHOBIC Okay, so, strictly speaking, the infamous Leviticus 18:22 does say “forbidden.” Here’s the thing: 1) The word translated as “forbidden” is “toevah.” While that translation isn’t … wrong, it’s sort of like saying “McMansion” means “really big house.” There are a lot of connotations in that word. The specific issue with toevah is that we … sort of … don’t know anymore exactly what it meant. Based on context, it seems likely that the word referred to something ritually forbidden. This part of Torah was written not only as a guide for future generations, but also to say “so, look around, see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT.“ Thus, if we interpret “toevah” to mean something that’s forbidden to do as a ritual before G-d, then the verse says nothing whatsoever about Adam and Steve and their two kids and their dog–it’s saying you shouldn’t have sex with another man in the Temple as a sacrifice. 2) Following the same “this is ritually forbidden” logic of toevah, this verse may also be interpreted as “don’t do sex magic,” which was a thing in. Like. A lot of fucking cultures at the time. 3) Hebrew is a highly gendered language, and the grammatical gender in this verse is really really weird. One of the “men” in this verse is given female grammar. Why? Who fucking knows, man, this isn’t the only grammatical oddity in Torah. (There are also places where G-d is referred to as plural, and also as female.) One suggestion is that this is a way of creating a diminutive–that is, that the verse should be read as “a man should not lie with a boy.” Now, it’s worth noting that modern secular scholarship has concluded the written Torah was written down around the 6th century BCE, and most non-Orthodox Jewish scholars are like “yeah, all things considered, that sounds pretty legit.” Do you know what else was happening around the 6th century BCE? What laypeople tend to mean when they say “ancient Greece” was happening. Do you know what happened a lot in that time period in Greece? Dudes forming relationships with younger boys, like ages 10-15, and using them for sex in exchange for financial gifts, mentorship, etc. While we don’t know just how young some of these younger boys may have been, we do know some were prepubescent. In light of this, and also something I mentioned under the first point–”see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT,” if this verse is interpreted to say “a man should not lie with a boy,” then it’s pretty clearly “my dudes, my fellows, my lads, don’t be fucking pedophiles.” 4) Because of the grammar I mentioned in #3, it’s also possible that “should not lie with a man as with a woman” is actually referring to a place, not an abstract personhood: a man shouldn’t have sex with another man in a woman’s bed. In the time period, a woman’s bed was sort of like–that was her place, her safe sanctuary. It was also a ritually holy place where babies were made. By having sex in her bed, you’re violating her safe space (and also introducing a man who may not be a male relative, thus forcing her into breaking the laws of modesty). If this verse is read this way, then it should be taken to mean “don’t sexually violate a woman’s safety and modesty.”5) And as an offshoot of #4, this may be a second verse relating to infidelity. Which woman’s bed is any random dude in 600 BCE most likely to have access to? His wife’s. But laws were administered differently based on whether the person they pertained to was slave or free, male or female, and so on–thus, a man committing adultery with a woman would be treated differently than man committing adultery with a man (especially because the latter would carry no chance of an illegitimate pregnancy). So you’ll note, there are a lot of ways to read this verse, and only a one-to-one translation with no cultural awareness produces “being gay is wrong, all of the time”.(You’ll also notice the word “abomination” is nowhere to be found. That’s like … a straight-up fiction created for who only knows what reason.) Apparently tumblr mobile doesn’t want to show @prismatic-bell ’s long and in-depth essay, so here’s the screenshots, because it still shows up on mobile browsers: Much appreciated. I love when scholarship and history debunks bullshit …I sadly have more bullshit to report. “removed for violating guidelines”, EVERY screenshot. …goddamnit Let’s try this again I am horrified that @prismatic-bell keeps getting censored + this info is gold. Many thanks, @pulmonary-poultry. This isn’t the only Jewish post of mine that’s mysteriously stopped showing up in searches and/or vanished from my blog entirely, but it is the one I get the most requests to repost, so this saves me from having to rewrite the whole damned essay. @the-invisible-self, thanks for bringing it to my attention that someone was able to preserve the post!
House: prismatic-bell:
the-invisible-self:

pulmonary-poultry:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


mandalorianreynolds:

kuriquinn:

prismatic-bell:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


prismatic-bell:


broken-bits-of-dreams:

prismatic-bell:


aiko-mori-hates-pedos:

artbymoga:
Throwback to all these Jesus comics I drew in 2012…

Good post OP


Good post, OP, and if you ever decide to do another may I please suggest “NOT IN HEBREW IT DOESN’T” as a punchline? So much of the Old Testament is HORRIFICALLY translated from the Tanakh, it drives me batty.


WAIT WAIT WHAT DOES IT SAY?????? I NEED TO LIKE,, DESTROY MI MUM FOR BEING REALLY HOMOPHOBIC

Okay, so, strictly speaking, the infamous Leviticus 18:22 does say “forbidden.” Here’s the thing: 

1) The word translated as “forbidden” is “toevah.” While that translation isn’t … wrong, it’s sort of like saying “McMansion” means “really big house.” There are a lot of connotations in that word. The specific issue with toevah is that we … sort of … don’t know anymore exactly what it meant. Based on context, it seems likely that the word referred to something ritually forbidden. This part of Torah was written not only as a guide for future generations, but also to say “so, look around, see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT.“ Thus, if we interpret “toevah” to mean something that’s forbidden to do as a ritual before G-d, then the verse says nothing whatsoever about Adam and Steve and their two kids and their dog–it’s saying you shouldn’t have sex with another man in the Temple as a sacrifice.

2) Following the same “this is ritually forbidden” logic of toevah, this verse may also be interpreted as “don’t do sex magic,” which was a thing in. Like. A lot of fucking cultures at the time.

3) Hebrew is a highly gendered language, and the grammatical gender in this verse is really really weird. One of the “men” in this verse is given female grammar. Why? Who fucking knows, man, this isn’t the only grammatical oddity in Torah. (There are also places where G-d is referred to as plural, and also as female.) One suggestion is that this is a way of creating a diminutive–that is, that the verse should be read as “a man should not lie with a boy.” Now, it’s worth noting that modern secular scholarship has concluded the written Torah was written down around the 6th century BCE, and most non-Orthodox Jewish scholars are like “yeah, all things considered, that sounds pretty legit.” 

Do you know what else was happening around the 6th century BCE? What laypeople tend to mean when they say “ancient Greece” was happening. 

Do you know what happened a lot in that time period in Greece? Dudes forming relationships with younger boys, like ages 10-15, and using them for sex in exchange for financial gifts, mentorship, etc. While we don’t know just how young some of these younger boys may have been, we do know some were prepubescent. In light of this, and also something I mentioned under the first point–”see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT,” if this verse is interpreted to say “a man should not lie with a boy,” then it’s pretty clearly “my dudes, my fellows, my lads, don’t be fucking pedophiles.” 

4) Because of the grammar I mentioned in #3, it’s also possible that “should not lie with a man as with a woman” is actually referring to a place, not an abstract personhood: a man shouldn’t have sex with another man in a woman’s bed. In the time period, a woman’s bed was sort of like–that was her place, her safe sanctuary. It was also a ritually holy place where babies were made. By having sex in her bed, you’re violating her safe space (and also introducing a man who may not be a male relative, thus forcing her into breaking the laws of modesty). If this verse is read this way, then it should be taken to mean “don’t sexually violate a woman’s safety and modesty.”5) And as an offshoot of #4, this may be a second verse relating to infidelity. Which woman’s bed is any random dude in 600 BCE most likely to have access to? His wife’s. But laws were administered differently based on whether the person they pertained to was slave or free, male or female, and so on–thus, a man committing adultery with a woman would be treated differently than man committing adultery with a man (especially because the latter would carry no chance of an illegitimate pregnancy).


So you’ll note, there are a lot of ways to read this verse, and only a one-to-one translation with no cultural awareness produces “being gay is wrong, all of the time”.(You’ll also notice the word “abomination” is nowhere to be found. That’s like … a straight-up fiction created for who only knows what reason.)


Apparently tumblr mobile doesn’t want to show @prismatic-bell ’s long and in-depth essay, so here’s the screenshots, because it still shows up on mobile browsers:








Much appreciated.


I love when scholarship and history debunks bullshit



…I sadly have more bullshit to report.

“removed for violating guidelines”, EVERY screenshot.



…goddamnit







Let’s try this again



I am horrified that @prismatic-bell keeps getting censored + this info is gold. 

Many thanks, @pulmonary-poultry. This isn’t the only Jewish post of mine that’s mysteriously stopped showing up in searches and/or vanished from my blog entirely, but it is the one I get the most requests to repost, so this saves me from having to rewrite the whole damned essay. @the-invisible-self, thanks for bringing it to my attention that someone was able to preserve the post!

prismatic-bell: the-invisible-self: pulmonary-poultry: the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99: mandalorianreynolds: kuriquinn: prismatic-bell...

House: ask-kirby-sans: paddysnuffles: cyhiraeth: jumpingjacktrash: vertisol: offendedfunyarinpa: dduane: laurelai: angelalchemy: standbyfortitanfall: girlwithalessonplan: heliosapollo: losed: A CROW TRIED TO GO IN OUR CLASSROOM AND HE HAD A PEN yes hello i am here to learn geometries That crow is more prepared than some of my students. You’ve all just like, completely skipped over the possibility that this crow has seen people using pens in this room, found one, and is trying to return it. There’s been videos of crows picking up sweet wrappers and stuff and placing them in bins after seeing humans put their litter in bins. I really do believe that this crow is trying to return the pen and that is ADORABLE AS HELL.  THEY ARE SO SMART I LOVE THEM Crows are thought to be self aware by some scientists. Its perfectly possible the crow wants to return the pen to humans. Knowing it belongs to humans. Corvids. Who KNOWS. :) Another cool crow deal: Once, when trying to assess if crows could reason and use tools, scientists had two crows who didn’t know each other each take a wire from a table (one was hooked, one was straight) and try to grab meat from a bottle with it. The crows could see each other, though they had separate bottles. Only the straight wire worked for this, so they hypothesized that if crows could reason, the second trial would have the two crows fighting over the straight wire. The second trial started and, to the surprise of the scientists, the two crows both went for the bent wire, one held it down and the other unbent it. They both got meat out of their bottles. They came to a peaceful solution without verbal communication. Crows are probably smarter than we are. they still shit all over the place and eat garbage ok but so do we @neurodivergent-crow Cool facts about crows: 1. Crows understand the concept of gifts. There’s a little girl who started feeding the murder by her house and they started bringing her trinkets (cool pebbles, coins, shiny things, bleached animal bones, etc) as a thank you.  2. Crows remember who has been kind to them and tell other crows about the nice humans. There are various examples of people who have helped crows and the crows not only come back to say hi, but also bring friends who need help over for the nice human to help. 3. Crows are the only other animal known to make tools in order to make another tool. 4. Crows have been proven to have a sense of self If you mark them with a coloured dot that they can see and then show them their reflection in a mirror they soon realize that the reflection is them and not another crow. 5. Crows have regional dialects and accents. They are also able to copy each other’s dialects and accents to fit in if they move to an area where the accent is different. 6. Crows regularly visit their parents after leaving the nest. They also regularly live with their parents after reaching adulthood to help with raising their younger siblings for up to five years before moving out. Crows are better than people
House: ask-kirby-sans:

paddysnuffles:

cyhiraeth:

jumpingjacktrash:

vertisol:

offendedfunyarinpa:

dduane:

laurelai:

angelalchemy:

standbyfortitanfall:

girlwithalessonplan:

heliosapollo:

losed:

A CROW TRIED TO GO IN OUR CLASSROOM AND HE HAD A PEN

yes hello i am here to learn geometries

That crow is more prepared than some of my students.

You’ve all just like, completely skipped over the possibility that this crow has seen people using pens in this room, found one, and is trying to return it. There’s been videos of crows picking up sweet wrappers and stuff and placing them in bins after seeing humans put their litter in bins. I really do believe that this crow is trying to return the pen and that is ADORABLE AS HELL. 

THEY ARE SO SMART I LOVE THEM

Crows are thought to be self aware by some scientists. Its perfectly possible the crow wants to return the pen to humans. Knowing it belongs to humans.

Corvids. Who KNOWS. :)

Another cool crow deal: Once, when trying to assess if crows could reason and use tools, scientists had two crows who didn’t know each other each take a wire from a table (one was hooked, one was straight) and try to grab meat from a bottle with it. The crows could see each other, though they had separate bottles. Only the straight wire worked for this, so they hypothesized that if crows could reason, the second trial would have the two crows fighting over the straight wire. The second trial started and, to the surprise of the scientists, the two crows both went for the bent wire, one held it down and the other unbent it. They both got meat out of their bottles. They came to a peaceful solution without verbal communication. Crows are probably smarter than we are.

they still shit all over the place and eat garbage

ok but so do we



@neurodivergent-crow 

Cool facts about crows:
1. Crows understand the concept of gifts.
There’s a little girl who started feeding the murder by her house and they started bringing her trinkets (cool pebbles, coins, shiny things, bleached animal bones, etc) as a thank you. 
2. Crows remember who has been kind to them and tell other crows about the nice humans.
There are various examples of people who have helped crows and the crows not only come back to say hi, but also bring friends who need help over for the nice human to help.
3. Crows are the only other animal known to make tools in order to make another tool.
4. Crows have been proven to have a sense of self
If you mark them with a coloured dot that they can see and then show them their reflection in a mirror they soon realize that the reflection is them and not another crow.
5. Crows have regional dialects and accents.
They are also able to copy each other’s dialects and accents to fit in if they move to an area where the accent is different.
6. Crows regularly visit their parents after leaving the nest.
They also regularly live with their parents after reaching adulthood to help with raising their younger siblings for up to five years before moving out.



Crows are better than people

ask-kirby-sans: paddysnuffles: cyhiraeth: jumpingjacktrash: vertisol: offendedfunyarinpa: dduane: laurelai: angelalchemy: standb...

House: From house representative to thug in seconds with just a wardrobe change
House: From house representative to thug in seconds with just a wardrobe change

From house representative to thug in seconds with just a wardrobe change

House: YOU PICKED THE WRONG HOUSE FOOL
House: YOU PICKED THE WRONG HOUSE FOOL

YOU PICKED THE WRONG HOUSE FOOL

House: Y’all got a nice house
House: Y’all got a nice house

Y’all got a nice house

House: awesomage:Not Famous But Awesome Deep House / Lounge Spotify Playlist
House: awesomage:Not Famous But Awesome Deep House / Lounge Spotify Playlist

awesomage:Not Famous But Awesome Deep House / Lounge Spotify Playlist

House: voiceswithenvy:The window of the house i was babysitting at 🌥🌱💐
House: voiceswithenvy:The window of the house i was babysitting at 🌥🌱💐

voiceswithenvy:The window of the house i was babysitting at 🌥🌱💐

House: R/Minecraft deemed this “too boring” so hopefully you guys will like the house me and my friends made.
House: R/Minecraft deemed this “too boring” so hopefully you guys will like the house me and my friends made.

R/Minecraft deemed this “too boring” so hopefully you guys will like the house me and my friends made.

House: So this is Eclipse. Every day she leaves her house by herself, and takes the bus downtown to the dog park. She even has her own bus pass attached to her collar.
House: So this is Eclipse. Every day she leaves her house by herself, and takes the bus downtown to the dog park. She even has her own bus pass attached to her collar.

So this is Eclipse. Every day she leaves her house by herself, and takes the bus downtown to the dog park. She even has her own bus pass...

House: Every single episode of House.
House: Every single episode of House.

Every single episode of House.

House: chillcrafting: part ll of my witch house//one
House: chillcrafting:

part ll of my witch house//one

chillcrafting: part ll of my witch house//one

House: reblog-house: I legit was like “how fucking tall and strong is the person in the alien disguise”
House: reblog-house:
I legit was like “how fucking tall and strong is the person in the alien disguise”

reblog-house: I legit was like “how fucking tall and strong is the person in the alien disguise”

House: blizzrhy: libertarirynn: dashas-hideous-laughter: fanburgers: laizy-boy: ask-crammaster-ham: here’s the closeted furries “hey man… can u bum me a cig” and “the one uncle nobody invites to the family reunion but SOMEONE keeps telling him where it is anyways” if you want an idea of what john is like, imagine hau from pokemon sumo ALSO the ppl who kept asking me for trans thomas art, HERE he’s trans in this au (;  ft John: I found the original Oh wow it’s even worse than I expected. This is truly the post of the decade Wait, but SUMO came out in 2016, I could’ve sworn I saw this back in 2015. How fucking dare you. How fucking dare you put this on my dash again. Just when I had eradicated it from my memory you dredge it back up out of the sewers. I will come to your house. I will burn it to the ground. I will end your bloodline. Wannabe teens pretending to be trans gotta stop making this shit. Is borderline offensive, honestly. Don’t make your characters trans for the sake of it. You’re only using a real and difficult condition to make your characters more “interesting”, it’s not useful to the story or relevant, to you it’s like character being blonde. It’s exactly the same as using rape to add action to an already shitty tale, just DON’T. That’s not even the real issue here. The issue is that these guys AREN’T CHARACTERS. They aren’t fucking fictional! They’re real historical people! Some of them were straight up fucking slave owners! “What if this actual historical person who had a teenage slave concubine was actually a cute black transboi uwu” is literally fucking horrifying.
House: blizzrhy:

libertarirynn:

dashas-hideous-laughter:

fanburgers:


laizy-boy:


ask-crammaster-ham:


here’s the closeted furries “hey man… can u bum me a cig” and “the one uncle nobody invites to the family reunion but SOMEONE keeps telling him where it is anyways”


if you want an idea of what john is like, imagine hau from pokemon sumo
ALSO the ppl who kept asking me for trans thomas art, HERE he’s trans in this au (; 
ft John:



I found the original 



Oh wow it’s even worse than I expected. This is truly the post of the decade



Wait, but SUMO came out in 2016, I could’ve sworn I saw this back in 2015.



How fucking dare you. How fucking dare you put this on my dash again. Just when I had eradicated it from my memory you dredge it back up out of the sewers. I will come to your house. I will burn it to the ground. I will end your bloodline.


Wannabe teens pretending to be trans gotta stop making this shit. Is borderline offensive, honestly. Don’t make your characters trans for the sake of it. You’re only using a real and difficult condition to make your characters more “interesting”, it’s not useful to the story or relevant, to you it’s like character being blonde. It’s exactly the same as using rape to add action to an already shitty tale, just DON’T. 


That’s not even the real issue here. The issue is that these guys AREN’T CHARACTERS. They aren’t fucking fictional! They’re real historical people! Some of them were straight up fucking slave owners! “What if this actual historical person who had a teenage slave concubine was actually a cute black transboi uwu” is literally fucking horrifying.

blizzrhy: libertarirynn: dashas-hideous-laughter: fanburgers: laizy-boy: ask-crammaster-ham: here’s the closeted furries “hey ma...

House: avgustaoktavia: Fresco from the House of the Centurion, Pompeii, first century BCE
House: avgustaoktavia:


Fresco from the House of the Centurion, Pompeii, first century BCE

avgustaoktavia: Fresco from the House of the Centurion, Pompeii, first century BCE

House: Hen House Party
House: Hen House Party

Hen House Party

House: dynastylnoire: writernotwaiting: hellenhighwater: astolen98saturnsedan: luadell: thisnewdevilry: sputnikcentury: teapotsahoy: lovedsomuch: warsfeils: anubituf: harukami: last-snowfall: weareallmedie: firedanceryote: reptila-tequila: qeilla: thefreckledavantgardegoober: mysticmisfit89: Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada….. No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck. And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car. moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.” like, fuck off with that I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals. They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people. Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away. I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING Moose are terrifying, you guys. I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist. I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside. If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah.  Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month.  Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD. Moose. MOOSE. I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this. The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that. Moose confirmed for actual kaiju. Kaiju category: Maple.   Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. @ssalogel For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is  4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant” And they can run up to 40 miles per hour A 16 wheeler with fur
House: dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lovedsomuch:

warsfeils:

anubituf:

harukami:

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”
like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING
Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.
I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 
Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 
Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.
Moose. MOOSE.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.


Kaiju category: Maple.  


Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive. 

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is 

4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour


A 16 wheeler with fur

dynastylnoire: writernotwaiting: hellenhighwater: astolen98saturnsedan: luadell: thisnewdevilry: sputnikcentury: teapotsahoy: lov...

House: jonerstrokes: arctic-hands: gokuma: becausebirds: Man saves House Finch frozen to rail. That poor bird had to be terrified It tweeted thank you Sometimes I love humans
House: jonerstrokes:
arctic-hands:

gokuma:

becausebirds:
Man saves House Finch frozen to rail.
That poor bird had to be terrified

It tweeted thank you

Sometimes I love humans

jonerstrokes: arctic-hands: gokuma: becausebirds: Man saves House Finch frozen to rail. That poor bird had to be terrified It tweeted...

House: An actual photo of my house
House: An actual photo of my house

An actual photo of my house

House: You’ve reached the house of unrecognized meme talent
House: You’ve reached the house of unrecognized meme talent

You’ve reached the house of unrecognized meme talent

House: An actual photo of my house
House: An actual photo of my house

An actual photo of my house