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Advice, Django, and Facebook: <?php header("Content-type: text/html; charset=utf-8"); *This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code. *I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing *using a BaseX setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS. The very long BaseX script, very long PHP presenter and very long XSLT *stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I bet they have mismatches somewhere. *Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to *correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice: *Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it *in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment. *Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world * and hope it will be enough. Farewell. error_reporting (E_ALL) ; ini_set("display_errors",true); print('<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF - 8 " ?>'."\n") ; ?> I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.
Advice, Django, and Facebook: <?php header("Content-type: text/html; charset=utf-8"); *This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code. *I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing *using a BaseX setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS. The very long BaseX script, very long PHP presenter and very long XSLT *stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I bet they have mismatches somewhere. *Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to *correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice: *Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it *in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment. *Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world * and hope it will be enough. Farewell. error_reporting (E_ALL) ; ini_set("display_errors",true); print('<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF - 8 " ?>'."\n") ; ?> I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.

I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.

Ass, Bad, and Blade: 1AM glyndarling: aerylon: loloftheday: Let’s see you little punks smash my letterbox now This reminds me of this guy who used to live on my dad’s street.   Every time it snowed, the snow plow would take out his mailbox - and only his mail box.  And just to be clear - it was done intentionally.  No one knows why, but the driver of the snow plow would target his box and mow it down.  He’d call the DOT to complain, and would get an earful of excuses that amounted to “not our fault you have a wimpy mailbox.”   Fast forward to the next winter.  First decent snow starts falling, and every kid is hoping for a snow day.  It was right around 4:30 am that the whole neighborhood was woken up to this loud CLANG and the screech of tearing metal.  My dad made it to the window first and started laughing his ass off. Sitting out side was one very totaled, and almost ripped in half, snow plow.  And these weren’t little pick-up trucks with a blade on the front, we have these up in NY: Well, turns out over the summer, my dad’s neighbor got himself a backhoe and sank a steel I beam into the ground in his front yard.  Then he covered it with a decorative wood sleeve and topped it with a brand new mailbox.  When the snowplow driver tried to mow it down it was a bad case of immovable object meets unstoppable force - and the mailbox won.  With the plow firmly impaled on the I beam, it was very clear that the driver had gone out of his way to hit it.   Naturally, the DOT wasn’t happy, and the neighbor’s reply was simple: “Not my faulty you have a wimpy snowplow.”  They did try to sue him for the damages, but as he had gone to the town, gotten approval for the post and its installation, and made sure everything was up to code, it was thrown out pretty quick.   And for anyone wondering about the driver…  He was fine.  His job and tighty-whiteys … not so much. That is a very satisfying read.
Ass, Bad, and Blade: 1AM glyndarling: aerylon: loloftheday: Let’s see you little punks smash my letterbox now This reminds me of this guy who used to live on my dad’s street.   Every time it snowed, the snow plow would take out his mailbox - and only his mail box.  And just to be clear - it was done intentionally.  No one knows why, but the driver of the snow plow would target his box and mow it down.  He’d call the DOT to complain, and would get an earful of excuses that amounted to “not our fault you have a wimpy mailbox.”   Fast forward to the next winter.  First decent snow starts falling, and every kid is hoping for a snow day.  It was right around 4:30 am that the whole neighborhood was woken up to this loud CLANG and the screech of tearing metal.  My dad made it to the window first and started laughing his ass off. Sitting out side was one very totaled, and almost ripped in half, snow plow.  And these weren’t little pick-up trucks with a blade on the front, we have these up in NY: Well, turns out over the summer, my dad’s neighbor got himself a backhoe and sank a steel I beam into the ground in his front yard.  Then he covered it with a decorative wood sleeve and topped it with a brand new mailbox.  When the snowplow driver tried to mow it down it was a bad case of immovable object meets unstoppable force - and the mailbox won.  With the plow firmly impaled on the I beam, it was very clear that the driver had gone out of his way to hit it.   Naturally, the DOT wasn’t happy, and the neighbor’s reply was simple: “Not my faulty you have a wimpy snowplow.”  They did try to sue him for the damages, but as he had gone to the town, gotten approval for the post and its installation, and made sure everything was up to code, it was thrown out pretty quick.   And for anyone wondering about the driver…  He was fine.  His job and tighty-whiteys … not so much. That is a very satisfying read.

glyndarling: aerylon: loloftheday: Let’s see you little punks smash my letterbox now This reminds me of this guy who used to live on my ...

Children, Growing Up, and Lenny: C humansofnewyork: “Nobody would give us a chance.  We were in our early twenties.  We had two young kids.  We were working, but living check to check.  At the time we were staying in the projects with my mother-in-law, but my kids were growing up, so we needed our own place.  But all the rental brokers wanted to see our bank statements.  And we had no savings.  We didn’t even have accounts.  Then one day I was walking down the avenue, and I saw a super fixing up an empty apartment.  I told him I needed to speak to the landlord directly.  No brokers.  And I guess he liked my vibe, because he gave me the name: Ronald Petrowski.  When I called Mr. Petrowski, I explained everything.  I told him we needed a chance.  He agreed to meet me and my husband at Lenny’s Pizzeria.  He bought us a plain pie and listened to our story.  He’d grown up poor himself, so he knew the struggle.  And he gave us a chance.  We’ve been in that apartment for 35 years now, and I’ve paid him every cent.  We’ve fallen on hard times.  At one point I owed him an entire year of rent.  But he was so gracious.  He never sent us an eviction notice.  Every time he came to collect, he’d sit at our kitchen table, have a cup of coffee, and listen to our situation.  Mr. Petrowski is my hero.  He sold the building a couple years ago, but we still keep in touch.  That man gave me a home to raise my children.”
Children, Growing Up, and Lenny: C humansofnewyork: “Nobody would give us a chance.  We were in our early twenties.  We had two young kids.  We were working, but living check to check.  At the time we were staying in the projects with my mother-in-law, but my kids were growing up, so we needed our own place.  But all the rental brokers wanted to see our bank statements.  And we had no savings.  We didn’t even have accounts.  Then one day I was walking down the avenue, and I saw a super fixing up an empty apartment.  I told him I needed to speak to the landlord directly.  No brokers.  And I guess he liked my vibe, because he gave me the name: Ronald Petrowski.  When I called Mr. Petrowski, I explained everything.  I told him we needed a chance.  He agreed to meet me and my husband at Lenny’s Pizzeria.  He bought us a plain pie and listened to our story.  He’d grown up poor himself, so he knew the struggle.  And he gave us a chance.  We’ve been in that apartment for 35 years now, and I’ve paid him every cent.  We’ve fallen on hard times.  At one point I owed him an entire year of rent.  But he was so gracious.  He never sent us an eviction notice.  Every time he came to collect, he’d sit at our kitchen table, have a cup of coffee, and listen to our situation.  Mr. Petrowski is my hero.  He sold the building a couple years ago, but we still keep in touch.  That man gave me a home to raise my children.”

humansofnewyork: “Nobody would give us a chance.  We were in our early twenties.  We had two young kids.  We were working, but living check...

Bodies , Clothes, and Fucking: G-Wiz @gwheele 1 Follow The USPS only gives Tribal residents PO boxes. Only residents with street addresses can vote. The Supreme Court just cut off voting rights to Native Americans in ND. The Supreme Court just made it harder for the Democrats to win the Senate A new ruling will prevent many Native Anericans in the state from voting motherjones.com 3:38 PM-9 Oct 2018 10,286 Retweets 8,321 Likes Follow @lilnativeboy Native Americans were the LAST to get the right to vote & now we are the first to lose it G-WİZ @gwheelel The USPS only gives Tribal residents PO boxes. Only residents with street addresses can vote. The Supreme Court just cut off voting rights to Native Americans in ND. motherjones.com/politics/2018... 12:35 AM-11 Oct 2018 5,610 Retweets9.715 Likes armsnotsigns: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: libertarirynn: rook-the-catechumen: hzs-modblog: rook-the-catechumen: gahdamnpunk: This is messed up Eh, monarchies are more stable governments anyways. That is the wrong response, mister! I’m sorry I can’t hear you over the literal multi-millennia that monarchy has peacefully and happily served mankind. You can take your few hundred years of a democratic-republic system of elected officials that always begins with a mountain of bodies and always ends in plutocracy, societal decay, the rich being in charge anyways, and another mountain of bodies. Monarchists get thrown into the harbor…if they’re lucky “multi-millennia that monarchy has peacefully and happily served mankind”  Fucking when? Oh my this man is fuckin the cybersmith in disguise isn’t he? Aye you can’t fool me warlock I know your stench! That’s not to say I’m defending the authoritarian cancer of Republican Democracy, but fucking what Monarchy served mankind peacefully? Even if we pretend it was a fictional Biblical monarchy led by Yahweh himself, he is very specifically not peaceful and makes it very clear in “his” own book. Just so we’re clear you know I was talking about the loon above not you, right? I know, I’m just reacting to him more. Sorry for confusion. Holy fucking wow “I mean sure in Saudi Arabia you can be fucking stoned to death for saying the wrong words or wearing the wrong clothes but like it’s stable y’know?”
Bodies , Clothes, and Fucking: G-Wiz @gwheele 1 Follow The USPS only gives Tribal residents PO boxes. Only residents with street addresses can vote. The Supreme Court just cut off voting rights to Native Americans in ND. The Supreme Court just made it harder for the Democrats to win the Senate A new ruling will prevent many Native Anericans in the state from voting motherjones.com 3:38 PM-9 Oct 2018 10,286 Retweets 8,321 Likes Follow @lilnativeboy Native Americans were the LAST to get the right to vote & now we are the first to lose it G-WİZ @gwheelel The USPS only gives Tribal residents PO boxes. Only residents with street addresses can vote. The Supreme Court just cut off voting rights to Native Americans in ND. motherjones.com/politics/2018... 12:35 AM-11 Oct 2018 5,610 Retweets9.715 Likes armsnotsigns: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: libertarirynn: rook-the-catechumen: hzs-modblog: rook-the-catechumen: gahdamnpunk: This is messed up Eh, monarchies are more stable governments anyways. That is the wrong response, mister! I’m sorry I can’t hear you over the literal multi-millennia that monarchy has peacefully and happily served mankind. You can take your few hundred years of a democratic-republic system of elected officials that always begins with a mountain of bodies and always ends in plutocracy, societal decay, the rich being in charge anyways, and another mountain of bodies. Monarchists get thrown into the harbor…if they’re lucky “multi-millennia that monarchy has peacefully and happily served mankind”  Fucking when? Oh my this man is fuckin the cybersmith in disguise isn’t he? Aye you can’t fool me warlock I know your stench! That’s not to say I’m defending the authoritarian cancer of Republican Democracy, but fucking what Monarchy served mankind peacefully? Even if we pretend it was a fictional Biblical monarchy led by Yahweh himself, he is very specifically not peaceful and makes it very clear in “his” own book. Just so we’re clear you know I was talking about the loon above not you, right? I know, I’m just reacting to him more. Sorry for confusion. Holy fucking wow “I mean sure in Saudi Arabia you can be fucking stoned to death for saying the wrong words or wearing the wrong clothes but like it’s stable y’know?”

armsnotsigns: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: mr-downer: vaporwavevocap: friendly-neighborhood-patriarch: libertarirynn: ...

Bad, Definitely, and Fail: jessicameats: brunhiddensmusings: katjohnadams: minusthelove: kingjaffejoffer: Executive chef at a top Thai restaurant tells Gordon Ramsay that his Pad Thai is trash [x] Lmao “what do you want to know from me?” Fuck! So no one thinks that Gordon’s being “Put in his place” or something, this is from Gordon’s show where he specifically goes to places around the world to be schooled in how they do their cuisine and un-fuck the British (Imperialist but we can’t admit that on TV, but he does hint STRONGLY at it in some episodes) way of cooking “exotic” dishes by learning from the people who do it best. That’s the world’s most successful chef putting himself in a position to learn from chefs around the world in world-class restaurants, grandmother’s houses, in a cramped make-shift kitchen on a rocking and speeding steam train, and more. He doesn’t shy away from learning from people who’ve never been in the remote vicinity of a culinary arts school or run a “professional” kitchen. And here he’s showing a chef what he thinks of as Pad Thai and if you don’t think one of the most talented chefs on earth didn’t know he was specifically setting himself up to fail to make a point to his audience, then hopefully you do now! <3  the context- he wasnt saying ‘heres my world famous pad tai for you to sample, a recipe i hold more dear then my own mother’ its closer to  ‘here, this is how i was taught to cook pad tai in liverpool by a man named charles, how far off am i?’ I also think the precise criticism is interesting. The other chef doesn’t say it’s bad. He definitely doesn’t say it’s trash. He doesn’t say it’s a bad meal. What he says is that it’s not pad thai. It’s been labelled as a specific thing and it doesn’t resemble that thing to someone from that culture.
Bad, Definitely, and Fail: jessicameats: brunhiddensmusings: katjohnadams: minusthelove: kingjaffejoffer: Executive chef at a top Thai restaurant tells Gordon Ramsay that his Pad Thai is trash [x] Lmao “what do you want to know from me?” Fuck! So no one thinks that Gordon’s being “Put in his place” or something, this is from Gordon’s show where he specifically goes to places around the world to be schooled in how they do their cuisine and un-fuck the British (Imperialist but we can’t admit that on TV, but he does hint STRONGLY at it in some episodes) way of cooking “exotic” dishes by learning from the people who do it best. That’s the world’s most successful chef putting himself in a position to learn from chefs around the world in world-class restaurants, grandmother’s houses, in a cramped make-shift kitchen on a rocking and speeding steam train, and more. He doesn’t shy away from learning from people who’ve never been in the remote vicinity of a culinary arts school or run a “professional” kitchen. And here he’s showing a chef what he thinks of as Pad Thai and if you don’t think one of the most talented chefs on earth didn’t know he was specifically setting himself up to fail to make a point to his audience, then hopefully you do now! <3  the context- he wasnt saying ‘heres my world famous pad tai for you to sample, a recipe i hold more dear then my own mother’ its closer to  ‘here, this is how i was taught to cook pad tai in liverpool by a man named charles, how far off am i?’ I also think the precise criticism is interesting. The other chef doesn’t say it’s bad. He definitely doesn’t say it’s trash. He doesn’t say it’s a bad meal. What he says is that it’s not pad thai. It’s been labelled as a specific thing and it doesn’t resemble that thing to someone from that culture.

jessicameats: brunhiddensmusings: katjohnadams: minusthelove: kingjaffejoffer: Executive chef at a top Thai restaurant tells Gordon Ram...