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Her Finger: did you know? did-you-kno.tumblr.com Michael the gorilla was taught sign language by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look- face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers believed this was a description of the poaching death of his mother. did-you-kno.tumblr.com didyouknowblog.com Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation: “People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23] Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age. more about Washoe: after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.” the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him. *information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson. Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could. now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face
Her Finger: did you know?
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 Michael the gorilla was taught sign language
 by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began
 signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth
 Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look-
 face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers
 believed this was a description of the
 poaching death of his mother.
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 didyouknowblog.com
 Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog
death-limes:

venipede:

osteophagy:

endcetaceanexploitation:

Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language.
One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation:
“People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23]
Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age.

more about Washoe:
after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.”
the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him.
*information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson.

Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could.

now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face

death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretake...

Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE sixpenceee: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring. The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed. The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession. Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home. Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.” When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated. (Source)
Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL
 LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE
sixpenceee:

After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.
The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.
The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.
Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.
Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”
When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated. (Source)

sixpenceee: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of wh...

Her Finger: kandrakelsierthe-formerone Follow lapushpaclk twilight but bella is accidentally super stoned every time edward does something weird and supernatural so she never actually notices or figures it out by herself, but she points it out every time and scares the hell out of him the cullens have had several code reds, all because edward's new lab partner keeps brushing up against him unintentionally and going "woan, dude. you re like, super cold" eventually, after months of them hanging out and her repeatedly missing key things he gradually makes more and more obvious he is literally sitting underneath the sun and sparkling, and she just squints at him, gives him a silly thumbs up, and then a high five shortly after he just gives up and tells her rosalielesbianhale edward being so fed up with keeping the secret from bella so they're lounging in the sun, with edward just waiting for it to click, for her to realise that he's not human bella spends so long looking at him with edward completely frozen in place waiting to see what her reaction will be. he's prepared for fear in her eyes, for her to scream, to distance herself from him or possibly run away. what he is not prepared for is her lazily trailing her finger down the length of his forearm and breathing out a single word. "pretty." she then falls back on the grass with her eyes closed enjoying the sun but edward is so outraged that he springs to his feet, not even bothering to move at a human pace and throws her words back in her face as if they were an affront. "pretty?? bella, this is the skin of a killer." bella just snorts, barely opening her eyes to look at him "okay, edgelord," there's a lazy smile on her face but she doesn't even bother to sit up before she continues, "edward, seriously, that's the skin of every teenage girl in the 90s and i admire your bravery in attempting to bring back body glitter but don't oversell it." hybridsins I stan stoner Bella morganfrederickrielly don't oversell it Stoner Bella
Her Finger: kandrakelsierthe-formerone Follow
 lapushpaclk
 twilight but bella is accidentally super stoned every time edward does
 something weird and supernatural so she never actually notices or figures it out
 by herself, but she points it out every time and scares the hell out of him
 the cullens have had several code reds, all because edward's new lab partner
 keeps brushing up against him unintentionally and going "woan, dude. you re
 like, super cold"
 eventually, after months of them hanging out and her repeatedly missing key
 things he gradually makes more and more obvious
 he is literally sitting underneath the sun and sparkling, and she just squints at
 him, gives him a silly thumbs up, and then a high five shortly after
 he just gives up and tells her
 rosalielesbianhale
 edward being so fed up with keeping the secret from bella so they're lounging
 in the sun, with edward just waiting for it to click, for her to realise that he's not
 human
 bella spends so long looking at him with edward completely frozen in place
 waiting to see what her reaction will be. he's prepared for fear in her eyes, for
 her to scream, to distance herself from him or possibly run away. what he is not
 prepared for is her lazily trailing her finger down the length of his forearm and
 breathing out a single word. "pretty."
 she then falls back on the grass with her eyes closed enjoying the sun but
 edward is so outraged that he springs to his feet, not even bothering to move at
 a human pace and throws her words back in her face as if they were an
 affront. "pretty?? bella, this is the skin of a killer."
 bella just snorts, barely opening her eyes to look at him "okay, edgelord,"
 there's a lazy smile on her face but she doesn't even bother to sit up before she
 continues, "edward, seriously, that's the skin of every teenage girl in the 90s
 and i admire your bravery in attempting to bring back body glitter but don't
 oversell it."
 hybridsins
 I stan stoner Bella
 morganfrederickrielly
 don't oversell it
Stoner Bella

Stoner Bella

Her Finger: Iris Scott and her finger painting
Her Finger: Iris Scott and her finger painting

Iris Scott and her finger painting

Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring. The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed. The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession. Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home. Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.” When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated. Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.” what did i just read Irish women are strong as fuck “I lived, bitch” irl
Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL
 LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE
lord-kitschener:
harokissmile:

ksteeno:

spoookyscary:

After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.
The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.
The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.
Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.
Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”
When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.
Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”

what did i just read

Irish women are strong as fuck


“I lived, bitch” irl

lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall wa...

Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring. The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed. The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession. Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home. Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.” When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated. Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.” what did i just read Irish women are strong as fuck “I lived, bitch” irl
Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL
 LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE
lord-kitschener:
harokissmile:

ksteeno:

spoookyscary:

After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.
The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.
The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.
Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.
Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”
When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.
Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”

what did i just read

Irish women are strong as fuck


“I lived, bitch” irl

lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall wa...

Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring. The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed. The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession. Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home. Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.” When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated. Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.” what did i just read Irish women are strong as fuck “I lived, bitch” irl
Her Finger: MARGORIE MCCALL
 LIVED ONCE, BURIED TWICE
lord-kitschener:
harokissmile:

ksteeno:

spoookyscary:

After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.
The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.
The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.
Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.
Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”
When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.
Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”

what did i just read

Irish women are strong as fuck


“I lived, bitch” irl

lord-kitschener: harokissmile: ksteeno: spoookyscary: After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall wa...

Her Finger: did you know? did-you-kno.tumblr.com Michael the gorilla was taught sign language by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look- face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers believed this was a description of the poaching death of his mother. did-you-kno.tumblr.com didyouknowblog.com Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation: “People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23] Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age. more about Washoe: after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.” the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him. *information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson. Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could. now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face
Her Finger: did you know?
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 Michael the gorilla was taught sign language
 by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began
 signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth
 Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look-
 face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers
 believed this was a description of the
 poaching death of his mother.
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 didyouknowblog.com
 Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog
death-limes:

venipede:

osteophagy:

endcetaceanexploitation:

Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language.
One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation:
“People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23]
Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age.

more about Washoe:
after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.”
the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him.
*information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson.

Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could.

now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face

death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretake...

Her Finger: did you know? did-you-kno.tumblr.com Michael the gorilla was taught sign language by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look- face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers believed this was a description of the poaching death of his mother. did-you-kno.tumblr.com didyouknowblog.com Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation: “People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23] Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age. more about Washoe: after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.” the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him. *information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson. Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could. now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face
Her Finger: did you know?
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 Michael the gorilla was taught sign language
 by Koko, the first signing gorilla. He began
 signing "Squash meat gorilla. Mouth tooth
 Cry sharp-noise loud. Bad think-trouble look-
 face. Cut/neck lip (girl) hole." Researchers
 believed this was a description of the
 poaching death of his mother.
 did-you-kno.tumblr.com
 didyouknowblog.com
 Cohen Gi n facebook.com/didyouknowblog
death-limes:

venipede:

osteophagy:

endcetaceanexploitation:

Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language.
One of Washoe’s caretakers was pregnant and missed work for many weeks after she miscarried. Roger Fouts recounts the following situation:
“People who should be there for her and aren’t are often given the cold shoulder—her way of informing them that she’s miffed at them. Washoe greeted Kat [the caretaker] in just this way when she finally returned to work with the chimps. Kat made her apologies to Washoe, then decided to tell her the truth, signing “MY BABY DIED.” Washoe stared at her, then looked down. She finally peered into Kat’s eyes again and carefully signed “CRY”, touching her cheek and drawing her finger down the path a tear would make on a human (Chimpanzees don’t shed tears). Kat later remarked that one sign told her more about Washoe and her mental capabilities than all her longer, grammatically perfect sentences.“ [23]
Washoe herself lost two children; one baby died shortly after birth of a heart defect, the other baby, Sequoyah, died of a staph infection at two months of age.

more about Washoe:
after the death of her children, researchers were determined to have Washoe raise a baby and brought in a ten month chimpanzee named Loulis. one of the caretakers went to Washoe’s enclosure and signed “i have a baby for you.” Washoe became incredibly excited, yelling and swaying from side to side, signing “baby” over and over again. then she signed “my baby.”
the caretaker came back with Loulis, and Washoe’s excitement disappeared entirely. she refused to pick Loulis up, instead signing “baby” apathetically; it was clear that the baby she thought she was getting was going to be Sequoyah. eventually Washoe did approach Loulis, and by the next day the two had bonded and from then on she was utterly devoted to him.
*information shamelessly paraphrased from When Elephants Weep by Jeffrey Masson.

Even more interestingly, after Washoe and Loulis bonded, she started teaching him American Sign Language the same way that human parents teach their children language. It only took Loulis eight days to learn his first sign from Washoe, and aside from the seven that his human handlers learned around him, he learned to speak in ASL just as fluently as Washoe and was able to communicate with humans in the same way she could.

now if y'all don’t think this is the tightest shit you can get outta my face

death-limes: venipede: osteophagy: endcetaceanexploitation: Washoe was a chimp who was taught sign language. One of Washoe’s caretake...

Her Finger: Home Videos Untitled document File Edit View Insert Format Tools Table Help 6 other collaborators See what it's like to collaborate with famous storytellers. Admittedly, a few years after their prime. Share your collaboration Check out what else is possible once you go Google. iwouldservehim: amelietlikemysoul: vaspider: thebibliosphere: mojavejourneys: fancyladssnacks: reddragonsbreath: barrett-the-babe: caiusmartiuscoriolanus: incestiel: almostdiedthreetimes: feasibleweasel: autonomousartisan: demoniccupcake: the-guy-below-me-sucks: doctorfeelbad: couragemadnessfriendshiplove: world-shaker: Want to collaborate on a Google Doc with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickinson, Dickens and Poe?  Click here. Start typing. Enjoy the hilarity.  Ninja Update: Wanna see something fun? Mention Shakespeare in a sentence and see what happens.  Poe kept writing distinctly into my sentences so I wrote ”Edgar, you’re not funny” aND HE BLATANTLY DELETED THE NOT I AM SO DONE WITH THIS ASDFKJL OH GOD IF YOU TYPE “EDGAR ALLAN POE” POE ADDS A :( AFTER HIS NAME PRECIOUS BABY Oh my God so I typed ‘Shakespeare’ and Shakespeare butted in and wrote ‘The lovely and handsome Shakespeare’ but Poe burst in saying ‘The dreadful and lonely Shakespeare’. aND FYODOR DOSTOYVESKY ADDED ‘ I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.” I’M DONE. Look what they did to All Star by Smash Mouth “Somebody once hushedly told me the world is going to roll me. I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of glocky with her finger and her thumb in the shape of a “L” on her forehead. Well, the years start voraciously coming and they don’t stop coming; fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. It didn’t make sense absolutely to live for fun. Thy brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. So much to do, so much to behold. So what’s wrong with taking the back busy thoroughfares? In everything one thing is impossible: rationality. You’ll never know if thou don’t go. “You’ll never shine if you don’t glow”, he growled incoherently. Hey presently, you’re an All Star. Get your game on; go play. Hey now, you’re a Rock Star. Get the show on; get laid. As well as all that glitters is gold, only shooting stars break the mold. ~All Star by Smash Estuary of opinion…” Imagine putting your research paper in here and letting them go at it. OH MY GOD I WAS WRITING AND EDGAR WOULDN’T STOP FIXING THINGS SO I WROTE “Edgar shut up I’m trying to write” and he changed it to “Edgar shut up I’m meagerly attempting to write” THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE I typed in “Hello” and Shakesphere erased it and wrote “Begone with this rubbish.” HOW R00d I typed “party in the Usa” and Poe changed party to “ill-fated gathering” I just used it to yell at Dickens about Tale of Two Cities, I am happy now I typed in ‘hello other writers’ and Edgar Allen Poe changed it to ‘Hello secondary writers’ After I had been writing for a while Edgar suddenly deleted my last sentence and wrote “THE END.” rude son of a bitch I have to try this. Rebageled again but to add if the link above doesn’t work, try this one instead. I put my author bio into it and Edgar Allan Poe and William Shakespeare started fighting over the werewolf puns. I put in the first three paragraphs of The Bureau and Charles Dickens dubbed Tom a ‘swaggering scoundrel.’ … this is very fucking legit. I TYPED POE AND DICKENS WROTE “Edgar the ever tormented and woeful soul” and Poe just responded with :( Two of them were having a continuous fight over a certain phrase and I wrote “Stop that you dicks” and Poe and Shakespeare intervened and made it “Quickly cease that thou dicks”
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amelietlikemysoul:

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Want to collaborate on a Google Doc with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickinson, Dickens and Poe? 
Click here. Start typing. Enjoy the hilarity. 
Ninja Update: Wanna see something fun? Mention Shakespeare in a sentence and see what happens. 

Poe kept writing distinctly into my sentences so I wrote ”Edgar, you’re not funny” aND HE BLATANTLY DELETED THE NOT I AM SO DONE WITH THIS ASDFKJL

OH GOD IF YOU TYPE “EDGAR ALLAN POE” POE ADDS A :( AFTER HIS NAME PRECIOUS BABY

Oh my God so I typed ‘Shakespeare’ and Shakespeare butted in and wrote ‘The lovely and handsome Shakespeare’ but Poe burst in saying ‘The dreadful and lonely Shakespeare’.
aND FYODOR DOSTOYVESKY ADDED ‘ I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.”
I’M DONE.


Look what they did to All Star by Smash Mouth
“Somebody once hushedly told me the world is going to roll me. I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of glocky with her finger and her thumb in the shape of a “L” on her forehead. Well, the years start voraciously coming and they don’t stop coming; fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. It didn’t make sense absolutely to live for fun. Thy brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. So much to do, so much to behold. So what’s wrong with taking the back busy thoroughfares? In everything one thing is impossible: rationality. You’ll never know if thou don’t go. “You’ll never shine if you don’t glow”, he growled incoherently. Hey presently, you’re an All Star. Get your game on; go play. Hey now, you’re a Rock Star. Get the show on; get laid. As well as all that glitters is gold, only shooting stars break the mold. ~All Star by Smash Estuary of opinion…”

Imagine putting your research paper in here and letting them go at it.

OH MY GOD I WAS WRITING AND EDGAR WOULDN’T STOP FIXING THINGS SO I WROTE “Edgar shut up I’m trying to write” and he changed it to “Edgar shut up I’m meagerly attempting to write” THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE

I typed in “Hello” and Shakesphere erased it and wrote “Begone with this rubbish.”
HOW R00d

I typed “party in the Usa” and Poe changed party to “ill-fated gathering”

I just used it to yell at Dickens about Tale of Two Cities, I am happy now

I typed in ‘hello other writers’ and Edgar Allen Poe changed it to ‘Hello secondary writers’

After I had been writing for a while Edgar suddenly deleted my last sentence and wrote “THE END.” rude son of a bitch


I have to try this.

Rebageled again but to add if the link above doesn’t work, try this one instead.

I put my author bio into it and Edgar Allan Poe and William Shakespeare started fighting over the werewolf puns.

I put in the first three paragraphs of The Bureau and Charles Dickens dubbed Tom a ‘swaggering scoundrel.’
… this is very fucking legit.

I TYPED POE AND DICKENS WROTE “Edgar the ever tormented and woeful soul” and Poe just responded with :(

Two of them were having a continuous fight over a certain phrase and I wrote “Stop that you dicks” and Poe and Shakespeare intervened and made it “Quickly cease that thou dicks”

iwouldservehim: amelietlikemysoul: vaspider: thebibliosphere: mojavejourneys: fancyladssnacks: reddragonsbreath: barrett-the-babe:...

Her Finger: Home Videos Untitled document File Edit View Insert Format Tools Table Help 6 other collaborators See what it's like to collaborate with famous storytellers. Admittedly, a few years after their prime. Share your collaboration Check out what else is possible once you go Google. iwouldservehim: amelietlikemysoul: vaspider: thebibliosphere: mojavejourneys: fancyladssnacks: reddragonsbreath: barrett-the-babe: caiusmartiuscoriolanus: incestiel: almostdiedthreetimes: feasibleweasel: autonomousartisan: demoniccupcake: the-guy-below-me-sucks: doctorfeelbad: couragemadnessfriendshiplove: world-shaker: Want to collaborate on a Google Doc with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickinson, Dickens and Poe?  Click here. Start typing. Enjoy the hilarity.  Ninja Update: Wanna see something fun? Mention Shakespeare in a sentence and see what happens.  Poe kept writing distinctly into my sentences so I wrote ”Edgar, you’re not funny” aND HE BLATANTLY DELETED THE NOT I AM SO DONE WITH THIS ASDFKJL OH GOD IF YOU TYPE “EDGAR ALLAN POE” POE ADDS A :( AFTER HIS NAME PRECIOUS BABY Oh my God so I typed ‘Shakespeare’ and Shakespeare butted in and wrote ‘The lovely and handsome Shakespeare’ but Poe burst in saying ‘The dreadful and lonely Shakespeare’. aND FYODOR DOSTOYVESKY ADDED ‘ I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.” I’M DONE. Look what they did to All Star by Smash Mouth “Somebody once hushedly told me the world is going to roll me. I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of glocky with her finger and her thumb in the shape of a “L” on her forehead. Well, the years start voraciously coming and they don’t stop coming; fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. It didn’t make sense absolutely to live for fun. Thy brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. So much to do, so much to behold. So what’s wrong with taking the back busy thoroughfares? In everything one thing is impossible: rationality. You’ll never know if thou don’t go. “You’ll never shine if you don’t glow”, he growled incoherently. Hey presently, you’re an All Star. Get your game on; go play. Hey now, you’re a Rock Star. Get the show on; get laid. As well as all that glitters is gold, only shooting stars break the mold. ~All Star by Smash Estuary of opinion…” Imagine putting your research paper in here and letting them go at it. OH MY GOD I WAS WRITING AND EDGAR WOULDN’T STOP FIXING THINGS SO I WROTE “Edgar shut up I’m trying to write” and he changed it to “Edgar shut up I’m meagerly attempting to write” THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE I typed in “Hello” and Shakesphere erased it and wrote “Begone with this rubbish.” HOW R00d I typed “party in the Usa” and Poe changed party to “ill-fated gathering” I just used it to yell at Dickens about Tale of Two Cities, I am happy now I typed in ‘hello other writers’ and Edgar Allen Poe changed it to ‘Hello secondary writers’ After I had been writing for a while Edgar suddenly deleted my last sentence and wrote “THE END.” rude son of a bitch I have to try this. Rebageled again but to add if the link above doesn’t work, try this one instead. I put my author bio into it and Edgar Allan Poe and William Shakespeare started fighting over the werewolf puns. I put in the first three paragraphs of The Bureau and Charles Dickens dubbed Tom a ‘swaggering scoundrel.’ … this is very fucking legit. I TYPED POE AND DICKENS WROTE “Edgar the ever tormented and woeful soul” and Poe just responded with :( Two of them were having a continuous fight over a certain phrase and I wrote “Stop that you dicks” and Poe and Shakespeare intervened and made it “Quickly cease that thou dicks”
Her Finger: Home
 Videos
 Untitled document
 File Edit View Insert Format Tools Table Help
 6 other collaborators
 See what it's like to
 collaborate with
 famous storytellers.
 Admittedly, a few years after their prime.
 Share your collaboration
 Check out what else is possible once you
 go Google.
iwouldservehim:

amelietlikemysoul:

vaspider:

thebibliosphere:

mojavejourneys:

fancyladssnacks:

reddragonsbreath:

barrett-the-babe:

caiusmartiuscoriolanus:

incestiel:

almostdiedthreetimes:

feasibleweasel:

autonomousartisan:

demoniccupcake:

the-guy-below-me-sucks:

doctorfeelbad:

couragemadnessfriendshiplove:

world-shaker:

Want to collaborate on a Google Doc with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickinson, Dickens and Poe? 
Click here. Start typing. Enjoy the hilarity. 
Ninja Update: Wanna see something fun? Mention Shakespeare in a sentence and see what happens. 

Poe kept writing distinctly into my sentences so I wrote ”Edgar, you’re not funny” aND HE BLATANTLY DELETED THE NOT I AM SO DONE WITH THIS ASDFKJL

OH GOD IF YOU TYPE “EDGAR ALLAN POE” POE ADDS A :( AFTER HIS NAME PRECIOUS BABY

Oh my God so I typed ‘Shakespeare’ and Shakespeare butted in and wrote ‘The lovely and handsome Shakespeare’ but Poe burst in saying ‘The dreadful and lonely Shakespeare’.
aND FYODOR DOSTOYVESKY ADDED ‘ I do not wish to make myself a laughing-stock before these idle listeners.”
I’M DONE.


Look what they did to All Star by Smash Mouth
“Somebody once hushedly told me the world is going to roll me. I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of glocky with her finger and her thumb in the shape of a “L” on her forehead. Well, the years start voraciously coming and they don’t stop coming; fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. It didn’t make sense absolutely to live for fun. Thy brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. So much to do, so much to behold. So what’s wrong with taking the back busy thoroughfares? In everything one thing is impossible: rationality. You’ll never know if thou don’t go. “You’ll never shine if you don’t glow”, he growled incoherently. Hey presently, you’re an All Star. Get your game on; go play. Hey now, you’re a Rock Star. Get the show on; get laid. As well as all that glitters is gold, only shooting stars break the mold. ~All Star by Smash Estuary of opinion…”

Imagine putting your research paper in here and letting them go at it.

OH MY GOD I WAS WRITING AND EDGAR WOULDN’T STOP FIXING THINGS SO I WROTE “Edgar shut up I’m trying to write” and he changed it to “Edgar shut up I’m meagerly attempting to write” THIS FUCKING ASSHOLE

I typed in “Hello” and Shakesphere erased it and wrote “Begone with this rubbish.”
HOW R00d

I typed “party in the Usa” and Poe changed party to “ill-fated gathering”

I just used it to yell at Dickens about Tale of Two Cities, I am happy now

I typed in ‘hello other writers’ and Edgar Allen Poe changed it to ‘Hello secondary writers’

After I had been writing for a while Edgar suddenly deleted my last sentence and wrote “THE END.” rude son of a bitch


I have to try this.

Rebageled again but to add if the link above doesn’t work, try this one instead.

I put my author bio into it and Edgar Allan Poe and William Shakespeare started fighting over the werewolf puns.

I put in the first three paragraphs of The Bureau and Charles Dickens dubbed Tom a ‘swaggering scoundrel.’
… this is very fucking legit.

I TYPED POE AND DICKENS WROTE “Edgar the ever tormented and woeful soul” and Poe just responded with :(

Two of them were having a continuous fight over a certain phrase and I wrote “Stop that you dicks” and Poe and Shakespeare intervened and made it “Quickly cease that thou dicks”

iwouldservehim: amelietlikemysoul: vaspider: thebibliosphere: mojavejourneys: fancyladssnacks: reddragonsbreath: barrett-the-babe:...

Her Finger: 0 IN MID-2004, WITH THE GLOBAL DOMINATION THAT WAS TO COME JUST A MURMUR ON THE HORIZON, WE FOLLOWED MCR AROUND THE UK FOR ONE OF THEIR VERY FIRST METAL HAMMER FEATURES WORDS: JOHN DORAN PHOTOS: JOHN McMURTRIE mcrscans.tumblr.com G- prepared for the accident that was to happen tonight at premier sauna-cum-venue, The Garage. During erard Way had been having premonitions that he was going to be blinded for months. The lead an eviscerating performance, Gerard throws himself singer of My Chemical Romancetoward the crowd just as one particularly lust-crazed kept on seeing it happen in dreams and each time he would young woman thrusts her arms up to touch him. Gerard, now wearing onyx-black shades, takes up the story: "I head-banged into her finger and it went right in my eye. It was the weirdest feeling. It was painful but the worst thing was how weird it was. I could feel her finger in my eye and all this really warm fluid running down my face. I thought my eyeball had burst and I just kept on thinking about the dreams I'd been having about wake up in a cold sweat, shaking. So he was almost going blind. I was like, 'Dude, I've lost this left eye: But the finger was right back into my socket around the eyeball where all the tendons and shit are. It made LEAP OF FAITH: THE MCRMY PILE IN ANK GENUFLECTS AT HE ALTAR OF SCREAM 38 METLHAMNERCOUK THE BROTHERS WAY: DIVVENT MESS garage RISTOR music "DOESTHE NUMBER 30 GO FROM HERE MATE?" a really weird slurping noise when she took it out.the outfit) from Newark, NJ, who, despite only having Metal Hammer has very strict rules about what girls acouple of single releases in this country, are starting can and cannot stick into its various orifices and this should definitely be a no-no. Gerard and the rest of themuch for their own safety, then they do about their fans. band are sitting around sharing coffee, beers and soft They walk out on stage to hand out bottles of water to drinks, waiting for their Manchester Hop And Grape show the people at the front and regularly douse the ones who soundcheck this evening and telling us all about how they look like they need it. They also try to protect their fans are beginning to take off in this country-while swapping from the carnage on stage if they get up there. It's Metal gig injury stories. Gerard reckons it would have been cool Hammers view that moshing is a good thing because it in a way to have lost his eye, saying: "Can you imagine gives people the chance to have catharsis and get the how cool it would be to wear an eyepatch on stage?" to cause a huge stir over here. And if they don't care violence out that is in us all without hurting anyone else You'd be the screamo Bluebeard!", adds taciturr drummer Matt Pelissier. All of the band have horror stories in this country under the age of 40 was made to go to one to tell when it comes to playing live and, watching thepunk or screamo gig a week then football violence would powerhouse performance that they put on, you can't help probably die out overnight. But Gerard still thinks there's but feel they should take out a hell of a lot more personal anegative element to it sometimes, saying: "Some of it injury insurance. "Frank [Iero] hit me in the face with the is macho bullshit. Some of the nu metal acts were just head of his guitar one night and it was bleeding so much encouraging violence for violence's sake. It gives punk that my entire face was covered in blood," says Ray Toro, rck a bad name and it makes it harder for the kids. Their the Afro-haired guitarist. "It was like a mask of blood." parents aren't going to let them go and watch bands if (usually). In fact, we'd go so far as to say that if everyone "We're a really physical band on stage," adds Gerard.they go and get the shit kicked out of them." "I slipped a couple of discs in my back on tour. Frank hasThe Garage is heaving hours before the gig even starts broken his wrist. We've all been hurt." It was the gig the night before when we first met up with the five-piece (Gerard's brother Mikey plays bass in and people keep on coming up to Gerard in the pub beforehand. He's nearly mobbed at one point by two girls coming out of McDonald's. "Oh! My! God!" says "We've all been hurt GERARD ON SOME OF THE NOT-SO-MUCH-PERKS OF THE JOB mcrscans.tumblr.com METALHAMMERCOUK 39 VEHICLES AND CONTENTS ARE LEFT ENTIRELY AT OWNERS RISK MCR'S WARM-UP YOGA one with hermouth full of Curly Wurly McFlurry "My! Chemical! Romance! for a quick pint. Now Gerard's got over the fear of nearly becoming a rocknrolcyclops, he can explain the genesis. And you can see why they're starting to attract this of their strange name. "The name is taken from an Irvine kind of attention when the gig kicks off. Within seconds Welsh book. Me and Mikey were looking at a copy of Ecstasy, of the first song, Gerard is in the crowd, screaming and thrashing like a younger, better-looking Casey Chaos. Their music is reminiscent of other emo/post-hardcoreChemical Romance mean so much on so many different bands such as Funeral For A Friend and Hundred Reasons, levels. It seemed to be the only way to describe the music. but they have a scruffier, punkier edge, which comes fromAnd in another way, Trainspotting is generally set in this the fact that they're all massive fans of Black Flag. and on the inside it said, Three tales of chemical romance." The de facto leader of the group adds: "Well, the words area with people getting caught up in a scene and a vibe The band, it has to be said, as nice as they are, don't appear to be very rock'n'roll. Hammer groans inwardly when it gets on the tour bus, as the two DVDs that are out on show are Dungeons & Dragons, the cartoon, and a stop-motion animation of Wind In The Willows. Nearly all the band go straight to bed, leaving Hammer Matt, who looks like he would sooner be pulling his own up with just Matt and the drummers from Hondo Macleanteeth out with pliers than being interviewed, perks up and The Bled, drinking Stella, listening to Refused and slightly and says, "Newark is in the State of New Jersey, talking about hi-hats. C-c-c-call the cops! where there's a lot of drugs about and that resonated with us because of all the stuff we had to fight through to become a band. The strange thing is that when you watch the movie with the drug addiction and murder, it evern looks like Newark, where we come from!" a few hours outside of New York. It's a complete goddamn The next day, when Hammer has unstuck its tonguewasteland. It's been shut down for about 20 years. It from the floor and tried to rub its aching pancreas better, we look for the band, but apparently they all got up What does it smell of?" we ask. to go sightseeing around Manchester at 5.30 this morning. "Dead bodies", he replies nonchalantly. 5.30am? That was only half an hour after Hammer went to bed! Later, after a lot of fannying about with gaffa tape says, "and during that period I was using substances and hairspray, the band finally say theyre ready to go out to overcome other substances. smells godawful." "Also, at the time I was drinking severely," Gerard "I could feel her finger in my eye... I thought my eyeball had burst" NO, ITS NOT A WEIRD GROUPIE STORY mcrscans.tumblr.com 40 METRIHAMMERCOUK "Id had a really bad year before the band and that helped me get out of it. My art career had gone down the like he could have stepped straight out of Flock Of shitter, 9/11 had just happened. I was quite close to that Seagulls, Gerard is a goth-rock marauder with raven- at the time and it affected me in a very bad way. I became black hair, torn black clothing and aviator shades, and like a hermit and just started drinking all the time and Matt, with his backwards cap and goatee beard, looks I didn't want to do anything with my life. And drinking like he's ready to walk on stage filling in for Metallica. and not doing anything else is the worst thing you can Frank is the most 'modern-looking guy in the band do in terms of depression. I had to go and see a therapist with his punctured face, gun and heart tattoos, and for the first time ever and she put me on antidepressants. asymmetrical haircut. Suddenly all their disparate looks But it wasn'tthe counselling or the drugs, it was the band gel and they look like a band should: a band of brothers. that got me out of my depression. I had a purpose again." "In this life you gotta do what you gotta do!" yells with his MC5/Mars Volta 'fro, the rake-thin Mikey looks All of the band have had similar experiences. "I think Gerard before pausing and adding, "And if that means you'll find none of us was the cool kid at school," offers doing a line of coke and getting a blow job, then that's Frank. "I felt like I never fitted in when I was younger and what you gotta do!" I think depression is a normal thing that happens in thatHammer ain't gonna argue, and by the end of the show situation. So a lot of those emotions go into our songs. there have been more members of the audience running We keep it in check now. Sometimes I go a little bit off the across the stage and diving off than those who haven't. rails but we keep each other in check. There's always beer After dragging Frank off for a quick curry in nearby around when you're on tour. You're more likely to get beer Rusholme, just to prove that all English food isn't shit, tickets than meal tickets." we rejoin the others in Manchester's premier rock bar, The reason that bands drink so much on tour is because Big Hands, where a dizzying array of beers are drunk of all of the downtime there is to kil. Matt, who doesnt by the band, and by the swelling ranks of girls who want drink that often, says: You'll get kids who are desperate to drink with them. to come backstage and when they run into the dressingWe leave them at about 3am, cavorting on the streets of room there will be, like, one guy asleep, two having a chat, Manchester, singing note-perfect impressions of English one watching the TV and another smoking a cigarettebands while dreaming about world domination. they always look so depressed, like they've walked into the wrong room. Why? You feel like saying, Look, you'd be having a better time if you were out at the bar." Frank agrees: The hour you're on stage and meeting the kids afterwards is what it's all about. It is the 22.5 GERARD WOULD NEVER LET ANYONE INTO HIS SACRED CRYPT hours of the day which is boring when you're on tour." But if last night's gig was incendiary, tonight's is certifiably cooler. Ray looks like a 1960s urban guerrilla If 'DUDE, WHERE'S MY EYE?" mcrscans.tumblr.com METALHAMM ERCOUK 41 mcrscans: My Chemical Romance (UK tour special, 2004) article for Metal Hammer Special, 2013 by John Doran, photography by John McMurtrie.
Her Finger: 0
 IN MID-2004, WITH THE GLOBAL DOMINATION THAT WAS TO COME
 JUST A MURMUR ON THE HORIZON, WE FOLLOWED MCR AROUND
 THE UK FOR ONE OF THEIR VERY FIRST METAL HAMMER FEATURES
 WORDS: JOHN DORAN PHOTOS: JOHN McMURTRIE
 mcrscans.tumblr.com
 G-
 prepared for the accident that was to happen tonight at
 premier sauna-cum-venue, The Garage. During
 erard Way had been having
 premonitions that he was going
 to be blinded for months. The lead an eviscerating performance, Gerard throws himself
 singer of My Chemical Romancetoward the crowd just as one particularly lust-crazed
 kept on seeing it happen in
 dreams and each time he would
 young woman thrusts her arms up to touch him.
 Gerard, now wearing onyx-black shades, takes up the
 story: "I head-banged into her finger and it went right in
 my eye. It was the weirdest feeling. It was painful but the
 worst thing was how weird it was. I could feel her finger
 in my eye and all this really warm fluid running down
 my face. I thought my eyeball had burst and I just kept
 on thinking about the dreams I'd been having about
 wake up in a cold sweat, shaking. So he was almost
 going blind. I was like, 'Dude, I've lost this left eye:
 But the finger was right back into my socket around
 the eyeball where all the tendons and shit are. It made
 LEAP OF FAITH: THE
 MCRMY PILE IN
 ANK GENUFLECTS AT
 HE ALTAR OF SCREAM
 38 METLHAMNERCOUK

 THE BROTHERS
 WAY: DIVVENT MESS
 garage RISTOR
 music
 "DOESTHE NUMBER 30
 GO FROM HERE MATE?"
 a really weird slurping noise when she took it out.the outfit) from Newark, NJ, who, despite only having
 Metal Hammer has very strict rules about what girls acouple of single releases in this country, are starting
 can and cannot stick into its various orifices and this
 should definitely be a no-no. Gerard and the rest of themuch for their own safety, then they do about their fans.
 band are sitting around sharing coffee, beers and soft They walk out on stage to hand out bottles of water to
 drinks, waiting for their Manchester Hop And Grape show the people at the front and regularly douse the ones who
 soundcheck this evening and telling us all about how they look like they need it. They also try to protect their fans
 are beginning to take off in this country-while swapping from the carnage on stage if they get up there. It's Metal
 gig injury stories. Gerard reckons it would have been cool Hammers view that moshing is a good thing because it
 in a way to have lost his eye, saying: "Can you imagine gives people the chance to have catharsis and get the
 how cool it would be to wear an eyepatch on stage?"
 to cause a huge stir over here. And if they don't care
 violence out that is in us all without hurting anyone else
 You'd be the screamo Bluebeard!", adds taciturr
 drummer Matt Pelissier. All of the band have horror stories in this country under the age of 40 was made to go to one
 to tell when it comes to playing live and, watching thepunk or screamo gig a week then football violence would
 powerhouse performance that they put on, you can't help probably die out overnight. But Gerard still thinks there's
 but feel they should take out a hell of a lot more personal anegative element to it sometimes, saying: "Some of it
 injury insurance. "Frank [Iero] hit me in the face with the is macho bullshit. Some of the nu metal acts were just
 head of his guitar one night and it was bleeding so much encouraging violence for violence's sake. It gives punk
 that my entire face was covered in blood," says Ray Toro, rck a bad name and it makes it harder for the kids. Their
 the Afro-haired guitarist. "It was like a mask of blood." parents aren't going to let them go and watch bands if
 (usually). In fact, we'd go so far as to say that if everyone
 "We're a really physical band on stage," adds Gerard.they go and get the shit kicked out of them."
 "I slipped a couple of discs in my back on tour. Frank hasThe Garage is heaving hours before the gig even starts
 broken his wrist. We've all been hurt."
 It was the gig the night before when we first met up
 with the five-piece (Gerard's brother Mikey plays bass in
 and people keep on coming up to Gerard in the pub
 beforehand. He's nearly mobbed at one point by two
 girls coming out of McDonald's. "Oh! My! God!" says
 "We've all been hurt
 GERARD ON SOME OF THE NOT-SO-MUCH-PERKS OF THE JOB
 mcrscans.tumblr.com
 METALHAMMERCOUK 39

 VEHICLES AND
 CONTENTS
 ARE LEFT
 ENTIRELY AT
 OWNERS RISK
 MCR'S
 WARM-UP YOGA
 one with hermouth full of Curly Wurly McFlurry "My!
 Chemical! Romance!
 for a quick pint. Now Gerard's got over the fear of nearly
 becoming a rocknrolcyclops, he can explain the genesis.
 And you can see why they're starting to attract this
 of their strange name. "The name is taken from an Irvine
 kind of attention when the gig kicks off. Within seconds Welsh book. Me and Mikey were looking at a copy of Ecstasy,
 of the first song, Gerard is in the crowd, screaming and
 thrashing like a younger, better-looking Casey Chaos.
 Their music is reminiscent of other emo/post-hardcoreChemical Romance mean so much on so many different
 bands such as Funeral For A Friend and Hundred Reasons, levels. It seemed to be the only way to describe the music.
 but they have a scruffier, punkier edge, which comes fromAnd in another way, Trainspotting is generally set in this
 the fact that they're all massive fans of Black Flag.
 and on the inside it said, Three tales of chemical romance."
 The de facto leader of the group adds: "Well, the words
 area with people getting caught up in a scene and a vibe
 The band, it has to be said, as nice as they are, don't
 appear to be very rock'n'roll. Hammer groans inwardly
 when it gets on the tour bus, as the two DVDs that are
 out on show are Dungeons & Dragons, the cartoon,
 and a stop-motion animation of Wind In The Willows.
 Nearly all the band go straight to bed, leaving Hammer Matt, who looks like he would sooner be pulling his own
 up with just Matt and the drummers from Hondo Macleanteeth out with pliers than being interviewed, perks up
 and The Bled, drinking Stella, listening to Refused and slightly and says, "Newark is in the State of New Jersey,
 talking about hi-hats. C-c-c-call the cops!
 where there's a lot of drugs about and that resonated
 with us because of all the stuff we had to fight through to
 become a band. The strange thing is that when you watch
 the movie with the drug addiction and murder, it evern
 looks like Newark, where we come from!"
 a few hours outside of New York. It's a complete goddamn
 The next day, when Hammer has unstuck its tonguewasteland. It's been shut down for about 20 years. It
 from the floor and tried to rub its aching pancreas
 better, we look for the band, but apparently they all got up What does it smell of?" we ask.
 to go sightseeing around Manchester at 5.30 this morning. "Dead bodies", he replies nonchalantly.
 5.30am? That was only half an hour after Hammer went
 to bed! Later, after a lot of fannying about with gaffa tape says, "and during that period I was using substances
 and hairspray, the band finally say theyre ready to go out to overcome other substances.
 smells godawful."
 "Also, at the time I was drinking severely," Gerard
 "I could feel her finger in my eye...
 I thought my eyeball had burst"
 NO, ITS NOT A WEIRD GROUPIE STORY
 mcrscans.tumblr.com
 40 METRIHAMMERCOUK

 "Id had a really bad year before the band and that
 helped me get out of it. My art career had gone down the like he could have stepped straight out of Flock Of
 shitter, 9/11 had just happened. I was quite close to that Seagulls, Gerard is a goth-rock marauder with raven-
 at the time and it affected me in a very bad way. I became black hair, torn black clothing and aviator shades, and
 like a hermit and just started drinking all the time and Matt, with his backwards cap and goatee beard, looks
 I didn't want to do anything with my life. And drinking like he's ready to walk on stage filling in for Metallica.
 and not doing anything else is the worst thing you can Frank is the most 'modern-looking guy in the band
 do in terms of depression. I had to go and see a therapist with his punctured face, gun and heart tattoos, and
 for the first time ever and she put me on antidepressants. asymmetrical haircut. Suddenly all their disparate looks
 But it wasn'tthe counselling or the drugs, it was the band gel and they look like a band should: a band of brothers.
 that got me out of my depression. I had a purpose again." "In this life you gotta do what you gotta do!" yells
 with his MC5/Mars Volta 'fro, the rake-thin Mikey looks
 All of the band have had similar experiences. "I think Gerard before pausing and adding, "And if that means
 you'll find none of us was the cool kid at school," offers doing a line of coke and getting a blow job, then that's
 Frank. "I felt like I never fitted in when I was younger and what you gotta do!"
 I think depression is a normal thing that happens in thatHammer ain't gonna argue, and by the end of the show
 situation. So a lot of those emotions go into our songs. there have been more members of the audience running
 We keep it in check now. Sometimes I go a little bit off the across the stage and diving off than those who haven't.
 rails but we keep each other in check. There's always beer After dragging Frank off for a quick curry in nearby
 around when you're on tour. You're more likely to get beer Rusholme, just to prove that all English food isn't shit,
 tickets than meal tickets."
 we rejoin the others in Manchester's premier rock bar,
 The reason that bands drink so much on tour is because Big Hands, where a dizzying array of beers are drunk
 of all of the downtime there is to kil. Matt, who doesnt by the band, and by the swelling ranks of girls who want
 drink that often, says: You'll get kids who are desperate to drink with them.
 to come backstage and when they run into the dressingWe leave them at about 3am, cavorting on the streets of
 room there will be, like, one guy asleep, two having a chat, Manchester, singing note-perfect impressions of English
 one watching the TV and another smoking a cigarettebands while dreaming about world domination.
 they always look so depressed, like they've walked into
 the wrong room. Why? You feel like saying, Look, you'd be
 having a better time if you were out at the bar."
 Frank agrees: The hour you're on stage and meeting
 the kids afterwards is what it's all about. It is the 22.5
 GERARD WOULD
 NEVER LET
 ANYONE INTO
 HIS SACRED
 CRYPT
 hours of the day which is boring when you're on tour."
 But if last night's gig was incendiary, tonight's is
 certifiably cooler. Ray looks like a 1960s urban guerrilla
 If
 'DUDE, WHERE'S MY EYE?"
 mcrscans.tumblr.com
 METALHAMM
 ERCOUK 41
mcrscans:

My Chemical Romance (UK tour special, 2004) article for Metal Hammer Special, 2013 by John Doran, photography by John McMurtrie.

mcrscans: My Chemical Romance (UK tour special, 2004) article for Metal Hammer Special, 2013 by John Doran, photography by John McMurtrie.

Her Finger: Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)19:54:36 No. 746664631 >2746670273 My autistic tinder hookup be me, 19 > ust quit night job, sleep schedule fucked up > have a cold > trying to stay up to fix sleep schedule, dying > fuck with girls on tinder, don't really care about it > used to try to get girls on it, gave up after only whales and retards were dtf > match with a mexican girl, 50 miles away > she's okay looking, not bad but nothing too special > send her a message saying "u like spaghettio?" > spaghettio's autocorrected to spaghettio, I thought it was funny > she just says "yes" > don't reply for a few hours > she sends me a message saving "you look like you have a big dick > I am confused and assure her that I do not > she says she wants to be penetrated > she says that she is moving away for school soon and doesn't want anything serious > I look her up on facebook and make sure that l'm not being catfished > see that she's about to move from the Midwest to California for school > the school is a community college > the subject gets changed, I ask her about herself while I nervously try to decide if I should fuck her > she starts telling me about her political stances, and how she wants to change the world > says she wants to teach at an inner-city school > I asked if she has ever gone to one, she says no but that she rode a bus with one once, and the students were all ignorant > she sends me a 15 minute john oliver video about translators helping the military in the middle east > I watch it for some reason > she starts talking about us fucking again > decide fuck it, I'm tired of missing my chances to get free puss > my only prior sexual experience is jerking my flaccid dick off on an escort's couch for 10 minutes tell her I'm dtf, ask for her numbe > she won't give it to me, she doesn't want us to get that close since she's moving > tells me she doesn't want to kiss when we hook up > fine with me, I'm bad at it anyways > she sends me her address Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)19 57 04 No. 746664850 File: 2.ipg (35 KB, 324x470) s it's almost 10 pm at this point, I've already been awake for 23 hours > I shower and finally leave at like 11 get in my newly-purchased $1500 piece of shit car > loud as fuck, power steering barely functional, tire pressure terrible > start heading to her house, 1 hr 20 min trip according to google > realize that I should stop to get a 5 hour energy and put air in my tires > go to speedway, buy the 5 hour energy -1/--Hime > cashier keeps talking to me about how I'll need it for pokemon go (it just came out) > he won't stop talking about it, meanwhile im nervous as fuck finally leave, put air in my tires > their pressure is extremely low and I've only driven for 20 minutes so far > keep going, scared that car isn't going to be able to make it > stop again at another speedway, about an hour into the trip >put the air in my tires, try to find my way back to highway > have shitty ass cheap phone service, can't get google maps to load > just get back on highway and keep driving for a while > google maps is loading again, I make it to her town > having severe stomach issues, about to shit myself > lose service in her town, have no idea where I'm at >pull up to a sketchy ass gas station, go in to release my bowels > later in life I find out that I have irritable bowel syndrome > shit in the bathroom for probably 15 minutes, it's now almost 1 am > leave the bathroom, 2 men standing at the counter smiling at me > avoid eye contact and leave > still nervous as fuck and without phone service > drive around her town not knowing what to do >want to go home, but I've already made it this far so I cant give up finally get service, check tinder to see over 10 messages from her > she's getting pissed and wants to know what's going on > I park in front of someone's house and tell her that I'm lost > try to memorize directions to her house in case I lose service again > head to her house once again, lose service >think I find her house, but it's a two-family house and her neighbors are outside for some reason > not sure what to do or where to park drive around the block a few times, her neighbors are obviously suspicious that my loud ass car keeps passing by finally decide to park, pull up in front of her house > her neighbors are staring at me, start calling someone > luckily have service and can message her > tell her ive arrived > unluckily she's retarded and won't come to the door she tells me to just walk in > tell her that sounds sketchy > she still wont come to the door, says shes busy drinking water neighbors still staring at me, almost 10 minutes have passed > decide fuck it, ill walk in > cop car pulls up as im getting out of my car s they shine their spotlight on me, they don't say anything > I wave like the autist I am to them > they don't react > just walk in, my heart is pounding > she's standing by the doorway wearing panties and a tank top > don't understand why she didn't just let me in but whatever she grabs me and leads me through her dark house > there is a child that she is supposed to be babysitting sleeping on the couch > her bed is just 2 twin size beds next to each other > it's hot as fuck and I don't think there is any AC, only a fan there's a huge mirror in front of her bed > Christmas lights all over her room > she lays down > I stand there awkwardly, unsure of what to do > just make small-talk about her neighbors she says something like "are we going to fuck or not?" > nervously strip to my baggy boxer-briefs >get in the bed, start kissing her thighs > she tells me to eat her out > I have no idea how to pull her panties off and start licking her nether regions no clue what im doing, she seems to be enjoying somehow though > decide to stick a finger in, she likes it s haphazardly jam more fingers in, she still likes it O Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)20:12:17 No.746666235 File: 4ipg (20 KB, 450x319) 2-746666831 >-746669345 >barely get it on, stick my chub inside her > thrust into her for a couple minutes, starting to lose breath > losing my boner minutes losing my boner > I get up and take my condom off > she starts sucking my dick her face is right around the corner from my asshole and I just had diarrhea she says she wants to ride me, I lay in the middle of her bed > the mattresses start to spread apart >I move to lay against the wall mostly on one mattress > it was dark so I couldn't tell, but I probably left ass sweat and shit stains all over her bed her titties are in my face, not totally sure what to do about them > I get back on top go for a few more minutes until I almost die she asks whyI keep getting so tired fuck her > I've been up for over 24 hours at this point, still sick we lay around talking about stuff for a while >trying to cool off, I don't even have a water >she rubs her hand on my dick and licks the precum off her finger > she sits on my dick while telling random stories tells me about how she was molested as a child probably giving me herpes > child starts knocking on door, crying > she yells at him to get back to bed > we get back to sex after 45 minutes try a few more positions > get her to try out some stuff like titty fucking and a foot job > I say "im gay" every time we switch positions because I am an autist and find it funny she asks me why I keep making fun of gay people she starts licking my mouth and tongue even though she said we shouldn't kiss > she's rubbing my dick on her clit and im about to cum > not sure what to do or say or where to cum > start to cum on her chest she sticks my dick in her mouth as I finish > we clean up, I ask her if she wants me to leave or if we should keep fucking > she says she planned on continuing > I somehow don't lose my erection and im miraculously able to continue >we do a few more positions, my unprotected dick is inside her while there is probably cum in my urethra Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)20:14:53 No.746666535· File: 5ipg (258 KB, 1300x1131) 746667711 >im fucking her hard at one point, she's moaning "seel See!" > ask her "see what? > she says "no, Spanish" > Im a retard > almost an hour goes by, we're both tired and hot now she says she really wants to do some freaky shit, asks me for ideas > I don't fucking know > I think she mightve came twice, I don't really remember >she came at least once, not sure how I did it >I just want to get another nut off > she's ferociously sucking my dick, im >she gives up and lays with her face in the bed, her ass up > it takes every little bit of energy for me to cum onto her ass 9 she tells me to take a photo so I do >she tries to move my hand to her asshole, I resist > get dressed, go for a hug she gives me a high-five instead, doesn't want us to get close >say bye, leave > drive home for over an hour >awake for like 30 hours, dehydrated, hot > contemplating life, the possibility that I got her pregnant > probably have herpes > just want to go home and shower and sleep > have never felt so dead inside >get home after 5 am, dad is getting ready for work >go to sleep without showering > periodically look her up to make sure she isn't pregnant struggling to cum Anon gets laid
Her Finger: Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)19:54:36 No. 746664631
 >2746670273
 My autistic tinder hookup
 be me, 19
 > ust quit night job, sleep schedule fucked up
 > have a cold
 > trying to stay up to fix sleep schedule, dying
 > fuck with girls on tinder, don't really care about it
 > used to try to get girls on it, gave up after only whales and
 retards were dtf
 > match with a mexican girl, 50 miles away
 > she's okay looking, not bad but nothing too special
 > send her a message saying "u like spaghettio?"
 > spaghettio's autocorrected to spaghettio, I thought it was funny
 > she just says "yes"
 > don't reply for a few hours
 > she sends me a message saving "you look like you have a big
 dick
 > I am confused and assure her that I do not
 > she says she wants to be penetrated
 > she says that she is moving away for school soon and doesn't want anything serious
 > I look her up on facebook and make sure that l'm not being catfished
 > see that she's about to move from the Midwest to California for school
 > the school is a community college
 > the subject gets changed, I ask her about herself while I nervously try to decide if I should
 fuck her
 > she starts telling me about her political stances, and how she wants to change the world
 > says she wants to teach at an inner-city school
 > I asked if she has ever gone to one, she says no but that she rode a bus with one once, and
 the students were all ignorant
 > she sends me a 15 minute john oliver video about translators helping the military in the
 middle east
 > I watch it for some reason
 > she starts talking about us fucking again
 > decide fuck it, I'm tired of missing my chances to get free puss
 > my only prior sexual experience is jerking my flaccid dick off on an escort's couch for 10
 minutes
 tell her I'm dtf, ask for her numbe
 > she won't give it to me, she doesn't want us to get that close since she's moving
 > tells me she doesn't want to kiss when we hook up
 > fine with me, I'm bad at it anyways
 > she sends me her address

 Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)19 57 04 No. 746664850
 File: 2.ipg (35 KB, 324x470)
 s it's almost 10 pm at this point, I've already been awake for 23 hours
 > I shower and finally leave at like 11
 get in my newly-purchased $1500 piece of shit car
 > loud as fuck, power steering barely functional, tire pressure terrible
 > start heading to her house, 1 hr 20 min trip according to google
 > realize that I should stop to get a 5 hour energy and put air in my
 tires
 > go to speedway, buy the 5 hour energy
 -1/--Hime
 > cashier keeps talking to me about how I'll need it for pokemon go (it just came out)
 > he won't stop talking about it, meanwhile im nervous as fuck
 finally leave, put air in my tires
 > their pressure is extremely low and I've only driven for 20 minutes so far
 > keep going, scared that car isn't going to be able to make it
 > stop again at another speedway, about an hour into the trip
 >put the air in my tires, try to find my way back to highway
 > have shitty ass cheap phone service, can't get google maps to load
 > just get back on highway and keep driving for a while
 > google maps is loading again, I make it to her town
 > having severe stomach issues, about to shit myself
 > lose service in her town, have no idea where I'm at
 >pull up to a sketchy ass gas station, go in to release my bowels
 > later in life I find out that I have irritable bowel syndrome
 > shit in the bathroom for probably 15 minutes, it's now almost 1 am
 > leave the bathroom, 2 men standing at the counter smiling at me
 > avoid eye contact and leave
 > still nervous as fuck and without phone service
 > drive around her town not knowing what to do
 >want to go home, but I've already made it this far so I cant give up
 finally get service, check tinder to see over 10 messages from her
 > she's getting pissed and wants to know what's going on
 > I park in front of someone's house and tell her that I'm lost
 > try to memorize directions to her house in case I lose service again
 > head to her house once again, lose service

 >think I find her house, but it's a two-family house and her neighbors
 are outside for some reason
 > not sure what to do or where to park
 drive around the block a few times, her neighbors are obviously
 suspicious that my loud ass car keeps passing by
 finally decide to park, pull up in front of her house
 > her neighbors are staring at me, start calling someone
 > luckily have service and can message her
 > tell her ive arrived
 > unluckily she's retarded and won't come to the door
 she tells me to just walk in
 > tell her that sounds sketchy
 > she still wont come to the door, says shes busy drinking water
 neighbors still staring at me, almost 10 minutes have passed
 > decide fuck it, ill walk in
 > cop car pulls up as im getting out of my car
 s they shine their spotlight on me, they don't say anything
 > I wave like the autist I am to them
 > they don't react
 > just walk in, my heart is pounding
 > she's standing by the doorway wearing panties and a tank top
 > don't understand why she didn't just let me in but whatever
 she grabs me and leads me through her dark house
 > there is a child that she is supposed to be babysitting sleeping on the couch
 > her bed is just 2 twin size beds next to each other
 > it's hot as fuck and I don't think there is any AC, only a fan
 there's a huge mirror in front of her bed
 > Christmas lights all over her room
 > she lays down
 > I stand there awkwardly, unsure of what to do
 > just make small-talk about her neighbors
 she says something like "are we going to fuck or not?"
 > nervously strip to my baggy boxer-briefs
 >get in the bed, start kissing her thighs
 > she tells me to eat her out
 > I have no idea how to
 pull her panties off and start licking her nether regions
 no clue what im doing, she seems to be enjoying somehow though
 > decide to stick a finger in, she likes it
 s haphazardly jam more fingers in, she still likes it

 O Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)20:12:17 No.746666235
 File: 4ipg (20 KB, 450x319)
 2-746666831 >-746669345
 >barely get it on, stick my chub inside her
 > thrust into her for a couple minutes, starting to lose breath
 > losing my boner
 minutes
 losing my boner
 > I get up and take my condom off
 > she starts sucking my dick
 her face is right around the corner from my asshole and I just had
 diarrhea
 she says she wants to ride me, I lay in the middle of her bed
 > the mattresses start to spread apart
 >I move to lay against the wall mostly on one mattress
 > it was dark so I couldn't tell, but I probably left ass sweat and shit stains all over her bed
 her titties are in my face, not totally sure what to do about them
 > I get back on top
 go for a few more minutes until I almost die
 she asks whyI keep getting so tired
 fuck her
 > I've been up for over 24 hours at this point, still sick
 we lay around talking about stuff for a while
 >trying to cool off, I don't even have a water
 >she rubs her hand on my dick and licks the precum off her finger
 > she sits on my dick while telling random stories
 tells me about how she was molested as a child
 probably giving me herpes
 > child starts knocking on door, crying
 > she yells at him to get back to bed
 > we get back to sex after 45 minutes
 try a few more positions
 > get her to try out some stuff like titty fucking and a foot job
 > I say "im gay" every time we switch positions because I am an autist and find it funny
 she asks me why I keep making fun of gay people
 she starts licking my mouth and tongue even though she said we shouldn't kiss
 > she's rubbing my dick on her clit and im about to cum
 > not sure what to do or say or where to cum
 > start to cum on her chest
 she sticks my dick in her mouth as I finish
 > we clean up, I ask her if she wants me to leave or if we should keep fucking
 > she says she planned on continuing
 > I somehow don't lose my erection and im miraculously able to continue
 >we do a few more positions, my unprotected dick is inside her while there is probably
 cum in my urethra

 Anonymous 09/29/17(Fri)20:14:53 No.746666535·
 File: 5ipg (258 KB, 1300x1131)
 746667711
 >im fucking her hard at one point, she's
 moaning "seel See!"
 > ask her "see what?
 > she says "no, Spanish"
 > Im a retard
 > almost an hour goes by, we're both tired and
 hot now
 she says she really wants to do some freaky shit, asks me for ideas
 > I don't fucking know
 > I think she mightve came twice, I don't really remember
 >she came at least once, not sure how I did it
 >I just want to get another nut off
 > she's ferociously sucking my dick, im
 >she gives up and lays with her face in the bed, her ass up
 > it takes every little bit of energy for me to cum onto her ass
 9 she tells me to take a photo so I do
 >she tries to move my hand to her asshole, I resist
 > get dressed, go for a hug
 she gives me a high-five instead, doesn't want us to get close
 >say bye, leave
 > drive home for over an hour
 >awake for like 30 hours, dehydrated, hot
 > contemplating life, the possibility that I got her pregnant
 > probably have herpes
 > just want to go home and shower and sleep
 > have never felt so dead inside
 >get home after 5 am, dad is getting ready for work
 >go to sleep without showering
 > periodically look her up to make sure she isn't pregnant
 struggling to cum
Anon gets laid

Anon gets laid

Her Finger: THE LITTLE MERMAI In the original story by Hans Christian Andersen, the prince marries the neighboring king's daughter The Little Mermaid commits suicide by jumping into the sea and dissolving into foam. THE PIEV PIPER In the earliest version, the Pied Piper is denied his payment for ridding the town of rats, so he then hypnotizes the town's 99 children into following him to a river E He uses his musical influence over them so that they enter the river and drown. CINVERELLA The step-sisters cut off portions of thier feet in order to fit them into the glass slipper A pigeon informs the Prince of their trick and then the pigeon pecks out the step-sisters' eyes The step-sisters live out the rest of their lives as blind beggars. GOLVILOCKS ANV THE THREE BEARS When the bears find Goldilocks sleeping in their bed, they catch her and rip her to pieces. Then they proceed to eat her SLEEPING BEAUTY Not a prince, but a neighboring king finds her asleep. He doesn't kiss her though. Instead, he rapes her while she's passed out. Then she becomes pregnant and gives birth to two children (still asleep) It is only after one of her children sucks off the flax from her finger that she finally awakes. Then she marries the same king that raped her LITTLE REV RIVING HOOD Little Red Riding Hood meets up with the wolf in the forest. The wolf gives her the wrong directions. He then later hunts her down and eats her She never even makes it to her Grandma's house True versions of classic childrens stories
Her Finger: THE LITTLE MERMAI
 In the original story by
 Hans Christian Andersen,
 the prince marries the
 neighboring king's
 daughter
 The Little Mermaid
 commits suicide by
 jumping into the sea
 and dissolving into foam.
 THE PIEV PIPER
 In the earliest version, the Pied Piper is denied his
 payment for ridding the town of rats, so he then
 hypnotizes the town's
 99 children into following
 him to a river
 E
 He uses his musical
 influence over them
 so that they enter the
 river and drown.
 CINVERELLA
 The step-sisters cut off portions of
 thier feet in order to fit them into
 the glass slipper
 A pigeon informs the Prince of their
 trick and then the pigeon pecks out
 the step-sisters' eyes
 The step-sisters live out the
 rest of their lives as blind beggars.
 GOLVILOCKS ANV
 THE THREE BEARS
 When the bears find
 Goldilocks sleeping in their
 bed, they catch her and
 rip her to pieces.
 Then they proceed to eat her
 SLEEPING BEAUTY
 Not a prince, but a neighboring king finds
 her asleep. He doesn't kiss her though.
 Instead, he rapes her while
 she's passed out.
 Then she becomes pregnant
 and gives birth to two
 children (still asleep)
 It is only after one of her
 children sucks off the flax
 from her finger that she
 finally awakes. Then she marries the same king that raped her
 LITTLE REV RIVING HOOD
 Little Red Riding Hood meets up with the
 wolf in the forest. The wolf gives her the
 wrong directions. He then later hunts her
 down and eats her
 She never even
 makes it to her
 Grandma's house
True versions of classic childrens stories

True versions of classic childrens stories