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Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures u/Oceanundertow Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him I am the dumb dumb mister. positive-memes:Bed time stories
Comfortable, Dude, and Dumb: Insomnia Adventures
 u/Oceanundertow
 Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago
 Get startled by phone ringing
 It's one of my players
 Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?"
 Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a
 favor?"
 OhGodHeKilledSomeone.gif
 Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot."
 Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick
 story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the
 recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my
 laptop at the office so I can't play them."
 NaniTheFuck.mp3
 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?"
 Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC
 acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister. Guess
 Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler."
 Me: "Wow...well, if it will help her sleep, then sure."
 Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to
 her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker."
 Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon."
 Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!"
 I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg
 Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS
 ENGAGE)..the time your daddy and his friends went
 deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?"
 Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises)
 I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story
 over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she
 eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and
 says he'll see me on game night.
 Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable
 for once. I should have thanked him
 I am the dumb dumb mister.
positive-memes:Bed time stories

positive-memes:Bed time stories

Head, Tumblr, and Blog: henkheijmans: A Tukuna Indian girl carries a caiman on her head, near Tabatinga, Amazonas State, Brazil, 1985 - by Stéphanie Maze, French/USA
Head, Tumblr, and Blog: henkheijmans:
A Tukuna Indian girl carries a caiman on her head, near Tabatinga, Amazonas State, Brazil, 1985 - by Stéphanie Maze, French/USA

henkheijmans: A Tukuna Indian girl carries a caiman on her head, near Tabatinga, Amazonas State, Brazil, 1985 - by Stéphanie Maze, French/US...

I Bet, Girl, and Mean: I bet that girl on the right has a mean left hook!
I Bet, Girl, and Mean: I bet that girl on the right has a mean left hook!

I bet that girl on the right has a mean left hook!

Be Like, Children, and Definitely: 48% 6:32 4G Thu., 8 Nov. 2018, 8:45 pm Ok ok. Valid point about the nudes but think about this... As you said 84 years later the movie titanic was made, it pulled an amazing $2.187 billion in the box office, won 11 Oscars and was the real birth of the great actor, Leonardo DiCaprio. A movie like that is remembered, not for the nudes but the love story that these nudes helped blossem into the romance of the century, envied by many. Not only could these nudes be the start of your own great romance but think about the royalties your own film could bring in another 84 years... Catherine, 24 Yes yes I hear you "but I won't be around for the royalties in 84 years" but Catherine.... Your children will reap the Australian Catholic University 11 km away benefits for years, so Catherine dont do it for me, don't do it for you... But do it for our children! Why won't I send you nudes? Let me remind you of this little movie called Thu., 8 Nov. 2018, 11:46 pm Titanic... a girl in 1912 has her naked body drawn in a sketchbook by a random dude that no one This is far and away the best opener has ever heard of... have ever heard in my 23 years on this Locks the drawing in a safe in a boat and THAT BOAT SINKS. And somehow 84 years later, the planet, I read it to my mum. Not even kidding. And she briefly discussed with me the idea of sending you a nude still ends up on television. No one is safe. nude purely for the comedic value of this message! What would it be like to date me? Ever ordered You've just clocked tinder, well done 10 nuggets and gotten 11 70O sir And the thought of setting our children up for life, now that's definitely tempting :p E42 Do it for the kids!!
Be Like, Children, and Definitely: 48%
 6:32
 4G
 Thu., 8 Nov. 2018, 8:45 pm
 Ok ok. Valid point about the nudes but
 think about this...
 As you said 84 years later the movie
 titanic was made, it pulled an amazing
 $2.187 billion in the box office, won
 11 Oscars and was the real birth of
 the great actor, Leonardo DiCaprio.
 A movie like that is remembered, not
 for the nudes but the love story that
 these nudes helped blossem into the
 romance of the century, envied by
 many. Not only could these nudes be
 the start of your own great romance
 but think about the royalties your own
 film could bring in another 84 years...
 Catherine, 24
 Yes yes I hear you "but I won't be
 around for the royalties in 84 years" but
 Catherine.... Your children will reap the
 Australian Catholic University
 11 km away
 benefits for years, so Catherine dont do
 it for me, don't do it for you... But do it
 for our children!
 Why won't I send you nudes?
 Let me remind you of this little movie called
 Thu., 8 Nov. 2018, 11:46 pm
 Titanic... a girl in 1912 has her naked body drawn
 in a sketchbook by a random dude that no one
 This is far and away the best opener
 has ever heard of...
 have ever heard in my 23 years on this
 Locks the drawing in a safe in a boat and THAT
 BOAT SINKS. And somehow 84 years later, the
 planet, I read it to my mum. Not even
 kidding. And she briefly discussed
 with me the idea of sending you a
 nude still ends up on television.
 No one is safe.
 nude purely for the comedic value of
 this message!
 What would it be like to date me? Ever ordered
 You've just clocked tinder, well done
 10 nuggets and gotten 11 70O
 sir
 And the thought of setting our children
 up for life, now that's definitely
 tempting :p
 E42
Do it for the kids!!

Do it for the kids!!

College, Community, and Gif: Kara @karawrite On behalf of, I dunno, EVERY FAT KID IN the USA, I'ma go ahead and call BS on the whole bullying creates mass shooters narrative. LGBTQ kids, kids of color, disabled kids, poor kids, girl kids are bullied. Who's doing the shooting? White boys whose parents don't secure their guns 5/22/18, 10:40 PM 39 Retweets 106 Likes shanlad: redmachasacorns: Not a single lie in sight…… Hello, college grad that actually wrote an award winning paper on this topic! Here’s some knowledge I’d like to share: There’s actually been studies as to why it’s usually white kids, a large conclusion amongst the criminology community is that those that often have more privileged lives (white kids in our society’s case) are less adept to dealing with stress and denial. Whereas minorities and others are more likely to cope and function normally despite stressors because of the constant stressors that come from systematic racism and/or other platforms of more limited priviledge. TL;DR: It’s usually a white kid because their privilege incacipated their ability to learn how to handle stress/ denial/ whatever without acting out. The less privileged are done used to the bs and thus typically dont turn to extreme measures as coping mechanisms. EDIT: I had reblogged this and added a link to the paper (which I should’ve done to begin with,) but it’s probably best I just edit my original reblog and add the link (which I also should’ve just done already.) Anyway, it can be found fully sourced here.
College, Community, and Gif: Kara
 @karawrite
 On behalf of, I dunno, EVERY FAT KID
 IN the USA, I'ma go ahead and call BS
 on the whole bullying creates mass
 shooters narrative. LGBTQ kids, kids of
 color, disabled kids, poor kids, girl kids
 are bullied. Who's doing the shooting?
 White boys whose parents don't
 secure their guns
 5/22/18, 10:40 PM
 39 Retweets 106 Likes
shanlad:
redmachasacorns:

Not a single lie in sight……

Hello, college grad that actually wrote an award winning paper on this topic! Here’s some knowledge I’d like to share: There’s actually been studies as to why it’s usually white kids, a large conclusion amongst the criminology community is that those that often have more privileged lives (white kids in our society’s case) are less adept to dealing with stress and denial. Whereas minorities and others are more likely to cope and function normally despite stressors because of the constant stressors that come from systematic racism and/or other platforms of more limited priviledge. 
TL;DR: It’s usually a white kid because their privilege incacipated their ability to learn how to handle stress/ denial/ whatever without acting out. The less privileged are done used to the bs and thus typically dont turn to extreme measures as coping mechanisms. 
EDIT: I had reblogged this and added a link to the paper (which I should’ve done to begin with,) but it’s probably best I just edit my original reblog and add the link (which I also should’ve just done already.)
Anyway, it can be found fully sourced here.

shanlad: redmachasacorns: Not a single lie in sight…… Hello, college grad that actually wrote an award winning paper on this topic! Here’s...

Saw, Bikini, and Girl: Husband saw a girl in a bikini doing this and thought he would follow her lead
Saw, Bikini, and Girl: Husband saw a girl in a bikini doing this and thought he would follow her lead

Husband saw a girl in a bikini doing this and thought he would follow her lead