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Fiance: Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.
Fiance: Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.

Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.

Fiance: Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.
Fiance: Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.

Ed from 90 days fiance looks like all of the Impractical Jokers mashed together.

Fiance: Finance is the new fiancé
Fiance: Finance is the new fiancé

Finance is the new fiancé

Fiance: My dad, my fiancé, and I built a snowman today (in april). Banana for scale.
Fiance: My dad, my fiancé, and I built a snowman today (in april). Banana for scale.

My dad, my fiancé, and I built a snowman today (in april). Banana for scale.

Fiance: My fiancé and I ordered a navy bathmat and this came, 10/10 would order again
Fiance: My fiancé and I ordered a navy bathmat and this came, 10/10 would order again

My fiancé and I ordered a navy bathmat and this came, 10/10 would order again

Fiance: Trashmouth Your Mom > 345,987 likes Trashmouth Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiance here was a fan. I hope he doesn't take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe BevvieMarshHoly Shit, Rich SummerKid324 Plot Twist view all 12,243 comments reddie-fucked-me-up: Art by the beautiful @koryandr, who listened to my idea in our Reddie Discord Server, blessed my fucking seeing globes with THIS beautiful sketch, and inspired me to write a little more <3The news broke overnight: Old tweets expose comedian Richie Tozier as homophobe.There was a huge “#CancelRichieTozier” party, of course. When isn’t there? A small handful of celebrities sounded off about their disapproval, a bunch of old haters flooded his comment sections of every social media account, and even a few fans spoke out, condemning him for it and shaming themselves for not “knowing something was up with him”.If you asked Richie, the only thing they should be shaming themselves for was telling a cock sucker he was homophobic for joking about other cock suckers on the internet five years ago, but hey. Who was he to judge?Now, normally Richie would have loved to jump on the scandal. Hell, he’d probably be right there along with his haters, insisting he have the most Extra™ of cancellation parties. Unfortunately though, he happened to be sleeping when the “receipts” surfaced. It wasn’t until he awoke, bleary eyed and exhausted, that he knew anything was amiss— the sheer amount of notifications on his phone being enough to scare anyone.Especially the five missed calls from his agent.“Oh fuck me,” He groaned, falling back against the pillows once more. Eddie was right there, pushing back into his space and nuzzling his face into Richie’s shoulder in a lazy attempt to block out the light.If Richie took a moment or two to stare before turning his attention once more to the shit storm on his phone, who could blame him?He scrolled through notification after notification, mind still rather numb from the early morning, but smiling nonetheless. I mean, how could he not, this shit was hilarious! Sure, he probably should’ve been calling his agent back, but instead he raised his phone in the air, snapping a quick shot of him and his fiancé to sent to their friends.It was maybe the best picture he’d ever taken.Growing up in a town as close-minded as Derry, Richie and Eddie were just a couple of the many who were raised to believe being gay was wrong. Richie grew up desperate to believe he was anything else (well, technically he was bisexual, but that was besides the point), and Eddie grew up believing he was inherently dirty.Eventually, they found a home in each other, but it had taken some time. They didn’t know how to allow themselves to be intimate, and there were a lot of stumbles. Just as there always is with your first love. Except, that “first love” was going to be their only love. Richie had made it official weeks ago. He liked it, and he finally, finally put a ring on it. He just… hadn’t gone public with it yet.Eddie didn’t mind. They were both still far more uncomfortable with public displays of affection than they’d care to admit. You could be run out of an arcade is someone thought you were so much as flirting with a guy. That kind of hardwiring took time to change.Well… looking at this photo— at the way their bodies could just exist together— Richie started to wonder if his hardwire wasn’t glitching. He just couldn’t get the math to work. Why would this ever be something he didn’t want to share? The way Eddie could just close his eyes and mold himself against Richie’s entire body, trusting him with this… this precious thing he was. This thing that probably should’ve belonged to someone more deserving, but he gave to Richie.With one last tired smile at the photo, Richie decided to do what he does best:Not think.It was a little difficult typing with one shoulder pinned under Eddie, but he managed fine enough, typing his official response to all the drama.“Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiancé here was a fan. I hope he doesn’t take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe”
Fiance: Trashmouth
 Your Mom >
 345,987 likes
 Trashmouth Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier
 news. My fiance here was a fan. I hope he doesn't
 take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe
 BevvieMarshHoly Shit, Rich
 SummerKid324 Plot Twist
 view all 12,243 comments
reddie-fucked-me-up:

Art by the beautiful @koryandr, who listened to my idea in our Reddie Discord Server, blessed my fucking seeing globes with THIS beautiful sketch, and inspired me to write a little more <3The news broke overnight: Old tweets expose comedian Richie Tozier as homophobe.There was a huge “#CancelRichieTozier” party, of course. When isn’t there? A small handful of celebrities sounded off about their disapproval, a bunch of old haters flooded his comment sections of every social media account, and even a few fans spoke out, condemning him for it and shaming themselves for not “knowing something was up with him”.If you asked Richie, the only thing they should be shaming themselves for was telling a cock sucker he was homophobic for joking about other cock suckers on the internet five years ago, but hey. Who was he to judge?Now, normally Richie would have loved to jump on the scandal. Hell, he’d probably be right there along with his haters, insisting he have the most Extra™ of cancellation parties. Unfortunately though, he happened to be sleeping when the “receipts” surfaced. It wasn’t until he awoke, bleary eyed and exhausted, that he knew anything was amiss— the sheer amount of notifications on his phone being enough to scare anyone.Especially the five missed calls from his agent.“Oh fuck me,” He groaned, falling back against the pillows once more. Eddie was right there, pushing back into his space and nuzzling his face into Richie’s shoulder in a lazy attempt to block out the light.If Richie took a moment or two to stare before turning his attention once more to the shit storm on his phone, who could blame him?He scrolled through notification after notification, mind still rather numb from the early morning, but smiling nonetheless. I mean, how could he not, this shit was hilarious! Sure, he probably should’ve been calling his agent back, but instead he raised his phone in the air, snapping a quick shot of him and his fiancé to sent to their friends.It was maybe the best picture he’d ever taken.Growing up in a town as close-minded as Derry, Richie and Eddie were just a couple of the many who were raised to believe being gay was wrong. Richie grew up desperate to believe he was anything else (well, technically he was bisexual, but that was besides the point), and Eddie grew up believing he was inherently dirty.Eventually, they found a home in each other, but it had taken some time. They didn’t know how to allow themselves to be intimate, and there were a lot of stumbles. Just as there always is with your first love. Except, that “first love” was going to be their only love. Richie had made it official weeks ago. He liked it, and he finally, finally put a ring on it. He just… hadn’t gone public with it yet.Eddie didn’t mind. They were both still far more uncomfortable with public displays of affection than they’d care to admit. You could be run out of an arcade is someone thought you were so much as flirting with a guy. That kind of hardwiring took time to change.Well… looking at this photo— at the way their bodies could just exist together— Richie started to wonder if his hardwire wasn’t glitching. He just couldn’t get the math to work. Why would this ever be something he didn’t want to share? The way Eddie could just close his eyes and mold himself against Richie’s entire body, trusting him with this… this precious thing he was. This thing that probably should’ve belonged to someone more deserving, but he gave to Richie.With one last tired smile at the photo, Richie decided to do what he does best:Not think.It was a little difficult typing with one shoulder pinned under Eddie, but he managed fine enough, typing his official response to all the drama.“Wow. Tough blow, this Richie Tozier news. My fiancé here was a fan. I hope he doesn’t take it too hard #CancelRichieTozier #BlowMe”

reddie-fucked-me-up: Art by the beautiful @koryandr, who listened to my idea in our Reddie Discord Server, blessed my fucking seeing glo...

Fiance: FAST LIVE TRASH EAT My fiance runs a paint your own pottery studio, one of her customers made this.
Fiance: FAST
 LIVE
 TRASH
 EAT
My fiance runs a paint your own pottery studio, one of her customers made this.

My fiance runs a paint your own pottery studio, one of her customers made this.

Fiance: DAILY NEWS VIDEO NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo Follow The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis DAILY NEws NEWS BITES RETWEETS LIKES 4,1172,215 Øcho @ochoBoomin , Follow #BlackLivesMatter g don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This is ridiculous. ot vou Lil bro because l NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk RETWEETS LIKES 14,14513,277 genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: The boy is autistic The boy and his father were in a truck The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times. There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific. 50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too. Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly.
Fiance: DAILY
 NEWS
 VIDEO
 NY Daily News Video
 @NYDNVideo
 Follow
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is
 claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis
 DAILY NEws
 NEWS BITES
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 4,1172,215

 Øcho
 @ochoBoomin
 , Follow
 #BlackLivesMatter g
 don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This
 is ridiculous.
 ot vou Lil bro because l
 NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self
 defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 14,14513,277
genericdubstep:

daughterofthestars08:

bellaxiao:

Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t

More infuriating info:
The boy is autistic
The boy and his father were in a truck
The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed
ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE
They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck
They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck
The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times.
There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific.

50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too.
Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly.

genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: The boy is autisti...

Fiance: DAILY NEWS VIDEO NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo Follow The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis DAILY NEws NEWS BITES RETWEETS LIKES 4,1172,215 Øcho @ochoBoomin , Follow #BlackLivesMatter g don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This is ridiculous. ot vou Lil bro because l NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk RETWEETS LIKES 14,14513,277 whimsysgeekery: genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: The boy is autistic The boy and his father were in a truck The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times. There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific. 50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too. Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly. I agree with the sentiments above, I just want to give an update here since Tumblr doesn’t do timestamps. The shooting was in 2015. Stafford was found guilty of manslaughter and is serving 40 years. Greenhouse pleaded guilty to negligent homicide and malfeasance in office and is serving 7 years total. Not enough but at least there was some semblance of justice done. Fucking hell.
Fiance: DAILY
 NEWS
 VIDEO
 NY Daily News Video
 @NYDNVideo
 Follow
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is
 claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis
 DAILY NEws
 NEWS BITES
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 4,1172,215

 Øcho
 @ochoBoomin
 , Follow
 #BlackLivesMatter g
 don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This
 is ridiculous.
 ot vou Lil bro because l
 NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self
 defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 14,14513,277
whimsysgeekery:

genericdubstep:

daughterofthestars08:

bellaxiao:

Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t

More infuriating info:
The boy is autistic
The boy and his father were in a truck
The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed
ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE
They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck
They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck
The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times.
There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific.

50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too.
Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly.

I agree with the sentiments above, I just want to give an update here since Tumblr doesn’t do timestamps. The shooting was in 2015.
Stafford was found guilty of manslaughter and is serving 40 years. Greenhouse pleaded guilty to negligent homicide and malfeasance in office and is serving 7 years total.
Not enough but at least there was some semblance of justice done. Fucking hell.

whimsysgeekery: genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: T...

Fiance: DAILY NEWS VIDEO NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo Follow The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis DAILY NEws NEWS BITES RETWEETS LIKES 4,1172,215 Øcho @ochoBoomin , Follow #BlackLivesMatter g don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This is ridiculous. ot vou Lil bro because l NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk RETWEETS LIKES 14,14513,277 genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: The boy is autistic The boy and his father were in a truck The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times. There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific. 50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too. Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly.
Fiance: DAILY
 NEWS
 VIDEO
 NY Daily News Video
 @NYDNVideo
 Follow
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is
 claiming 'self-defense' #JeremvMardis
 DAILY NEws
 NEWS BITES
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 4,1172,215

 Øcho
 @ochoBoomin
 , Follow
 #BlackLivesMatter g
 don't see All Lives Matter rallying for you. This
 is ridiculous.
 ot vou Lil bro because l
 NY Daily News Video @NYDNVideo
 The cop that killed this 6-year-old little boy is claiming 'self
 defense' #JeremyMardis youtu.be/f3UhWy81WBk
 RETWEETS
 LIKES
 14,14513,277
genericdubstep:
daughterofthestars08:

bellaxiao:

Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t

More infuriating info:
The boy is autistic
The boy and his father were in a truck
The father stopped the vehicle and raised his arms to show he was unarmed
ONE OF THE ARRESTED OFFICERS WAS ACTIVELY STALKING THE FATHER’S FIANCE
They are trying to claim self defense AND claim they didn’t know there was a child in the truck
They fired “no less than 18 rounds” into the truck
The father was hit but still alive. The boy ended up being shot in the head multiple times.
There is bodycam footage of the incident and every official/lawyer that has seen and spoken on it has called it horrific.

50% of all police violence victims are autistic or mentally ill. If an autistic person starts screaming or can’t look a cop in the eyes, they use that as an excuse to shoot. I hope Black Lives Matter starts talking about that, too.
Police violence hurts the mentally ill a lot and of course that also means black autistic / mentally ill kids are getting hurt and killed. Ableism is deadly.

genericdubstep: daughterofthestars08: bellaxiao: Self-defense? He’s 6 years old ffs…I can’t More infuriating info: The boy is autistic...

Fiance: And you guys have the nerve to call me a liar you had the nerve to try and act like my friend stand and see the sadness I was in friend me on Facebook, and then post pictures of my husband that you came from by God knows who to probably purposely interfere and feed him lies or you both were in on it together, COPS thats Who you both probably work for or you recruited him and he really did love me in the beginning your probably not even the real girl he was talking to l bet your whole identity fake, well l'm going to find out everything about you who you both are, and if it's the last thing I ever dol promise you that now l'm taking the private investigatorsrt on A and proof he, hired and sent You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More paid, to purposely inflict mental duress and trigger my PTSD I thought the was you on the nanny cam but see that's why A didn't get a dime, because he Was sloppy in the beginning And betweens, I knew he was cheating and using me and apart of publicly outing me after the wedding to create mental dehabilitation ive got all your names identities and pictures but atleastni figured it out before I was stupid enough to buy a car or pay a attorney it's you and him that hack my electronics vou were the one moving my stuff and hiding it when you were over here fucking him you both are perfect for each other psychopaths liars users and snakes but I promise you if l do it with my last breath I'm going to mak J 'e he goes to jail and if I'm лу I'll get all of You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More jail and if l'm lucky l'll get all of you sent to jail. I just wonder though for he was recruited just b4 the wedding or from the beginning something tells me that it was from the beginning.. Karma so going to get you, and misery you caused and cause others will fall upon your life's and souls the child your bearing will carry your sins, the Hapiness you stole all for money or other things of this world you'll pay for with your souls. But my life long torture ends today no longer will any of you win, no longer will I fall for your mind games I'm going to fight back and win win win, you guys are something else all the proof I have when we go to court and I know that your not the only girl S aka P is involved but vou know what th lians say laugh now cry <er... You think You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More laugh now cry later... You think your going to get away but this isnt American soil this is Canadian land this is the queens country where we are guided by humans rights and truly governed by the UN. And the UN has no tolerance for Gangstalking! And tell A I'm not signing anything 'II see him behind bars I'm going to make sure all the evidence is displayed in divorce court too he can say 911 calls that l abused him little does he know I have recordings of the calls where vou can see him putting on this grandiose display of false crys all while smiling... I know I've been knew he was dirty A with the tiny tinky dick. The life insurance he pulled out in my name, this time I'm not going to let me be the sacrifice because I'm focused sober and mentally grounded no You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More to let me be the sacrifice because I'm focused sober and mentally grounded no longer are my thoughts emotional there logical and intellectual get ready for me to expose who and what you ppl really are with God has my leader and archangel Michael my protectors will conquer and destroy this evil psychopathic cult/USGovt extension although now with proof you exist and names photos recordings I don't think the govt of Canada will be to pleased that the US has beern running unsanctioned operations within their borders.and nowI think it's time for thevUSB to be released You lost your mind. Leave me alone You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More This lady is convinced my fiancé is her husband in disguise. She thinks one of my friends is a bounty hunter from Texas sent by the Mexican cartel to steal her inheritance and ruin her relationship. (Idk if this belongs here, I didn't know where else to post this.)
Fiance: And you guys have the nerve
 to call me a liar you had the
 nerve to try and act like my
 friend stand and see the
 sadness I was in friend me on
 Facebook, and then post
 pictures of my husband that
 you came from
 by God knows who to
 probably purposely interfere
 and feed him lies or you both
 were in on it together, COPS
 thats Who you both probably
 work for or you recruited him
 and he really did love me in
 the beginning your probably
 not even the real girl he was
 talking to l bet your whole
 identity fake, well l'm going to
 find out everything about you
 who you both are, and if it's
 the last thing I ever dol
 promise you that now l'm
 taking the private
 investigatorsrt on A
 and proof he, hired and
 sent
 You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More

 paid, to purposely inflict
 mental duress and trigger my
 PTSD I thought the was you
 on the nanny cam but see
 that's why A didn't get a
 dime, because he Was sloppy
 in the beginning And
 betweens, I knew he was
 cheating and using me and
 apart of publicly outing me
 after the wedding to create
 mental dehabilitation ive got
 all your names identities and
 pictures but atleastni figured
 it out before I was stupid
 enough to buy a car or pay a
 attorney it's you and him that
 hack my electronics vou were
 the one moving my stuff and
 hiding it when you were over
 here fucking him you both are
 perfect for each other
 psychopaths liars users and
 snakes but I promise you if l
 do it with my last breath I'm
 going to mak J 'e he goes to
 jail and if I'm лу I'll get all of
 You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More

 jail and if l'm lucky l'll get all of
 you sent to jail. I just wonder
 though for he was recruited
 just b4 the wedding or from
 the beginning something tells
 me that it was from the
 beginning.. Karma so going to
 get you, and misery you
 caused and cause others will
 fall upon your life's and souls
 the child your bearing will
 carry your sins, the Hapiness
 you stole all for money or
 other things of this world
 you'll pay for with your souls.
 But my life long torture ends
 today no longer will any of you
 win, no longer will I fall for
 your mind games I'm going to
 fight back and win win win,
 you guys are something else
 all the proof I have when we
 go to court and I know that
 your not the only girl S
 aka P is involved but vou
 know what th lians say
 laugh now cry <er... You think
 You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More

 laugh now cry later... You think
 your going to get away but
 this isnt American soil this is
 Canadian land this is the
 queens country where we are
 guided by humans rights and
 truly governed by the UN. And
 the UN has no tolerance for
 Gangstalking! And tell A
 I'm not signing anything 'II
 see him behind bars I'm going
 to make sure all the evidence
 is displayed in divorce court
 too he can say 911 calls that l
 abused him little does he
 know I have recordings of the
 calls where vou can see him
 putting on this grandiose
 display of false crys all while
 smiling... I know I've been
 knew he was dirty A with
 the tiny tinky dick. The life
 insurance he pulled out in my
 name, this time I'm not going
 to let me be the sacrifice
 because I'm focused sober
 and mentally grounded no
 You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More

 to let me be the sacrifice
 because I'm focused sober
 and mentally grounded no
 longer are my thoughts
 emotional there logical and
 intellectual get ready for me to
 expose who and what you ppl
 really are with God has my
 leader and archangel Michael
 my protectors will conquer
 and destroy this evil
 psychopathic cult/USGovt
 extension although now with
 proof you exist and names
 photos recordings I don't think
 the govt of Canada will be to
 pleased that the US has beern
 running unsanctioned
 operations within their
 borders.and nowI think it's
 time for thevUSB to be
 released
 You lost your mind. Leave
 me alone
 You can't reply to this conversation. Learn More
This lady is convinced my fiancé is her husband in disguise. She thinks one of my friends is a bounty hunter from Texas sent by the Mexican cartel to steal her inheritance and ruin her relationship. (Idk if this belongs here, I didn't know where else to post this.)

This lady is convinced my fiancé is her husband in disguise. She thinks one of my friends is a bounty hunter from Texas sent by the Mexic...

Fiance: cacen so at the bar in which I work, there's an unofficial rule that all of our door staff must have names that start with D or rhyme with 'doorman', which has led to me be- friending a trio of six foot four men with beards called Doorman Logan, Doorman Drew, and Doorman Dan now, let me tell you now that Doorman Dan is the abso- lute love of my life. I don't care that he's a decade older than me and has a fiance. you know when someone is so extraordinary or impossible to define that they're simply referred to as 'a character? that's Doorman Dan. now, before I get into his personality, let's describe his appearance. imagine the most stereotypical Scand inavian person ever: tall, white-blond, strong-jawed. now, add a heavy South Walian accent and an orange jumper. that's Doorman Dan. since meeting him last year, I've discovered .he once had a dream that he had a tattoo that said 'shit happens' on his left arsecheek, so when he woke up he decided he had to fulfil the prophecy and got it tattooed on his arse by a bloke called Junkie Jeff at 9AM .he forgot to call his girlfriend for three months while he was in the army, and was complet unaware they had broken up until he wishe happy Christmas and she responded with what the fuck Dan .accidentally married his army buddy in Vegas for thirty-six hours .he saw someone beating up a guy for being gay, and instead of jumping in and fighting back he decided to get absolutely bollock-naked and stand in front of the homophobe until he got freaked out and ran off .he has a millionare buddy who rings him up once a month for 'mystery adventures', one of which has resulted in Doorman Dan no longer being allowed inside any John Lewis shops .he is convinced the love of his life is not his fiancee, but a man named Ned. upon being asked who Ned is, he shrugged and responded with: "TII know when I meet him. .he runs an Instagram account dedicated to his pet rabbits and refuses to let people into the bar unless they follow him his fiancee booked a wedding venue before he even proposed. "I don't even know if I'm invited, truth be told." when he caught a couple having sex in our loos, he didn't want to intrude so he just gently knocked on the door and asked if they'd like a snack . .he has created his own non-alcoholic cocktail called Doorman's Sunrise because he feels left out being the only person on the dance floor without a drink when he's patrolling the bar I could honestly write a ten-season sitcom about him cacen BIG OL UPDATE: HE GOT MARRIED LAST WEEK!!!! zohbugg I need 10 seasons and a movie about the life of Doorman Dan thecheshirecass I look forward to reading more about the loving, polyamorous relationship he and his wife develop with Ned when they finally meet. fuckveahdiomedes What's the instagram for the rabbits, op? Source: cacen 114,993 notes The adventures of doorman dan
Fiance: cacen
 so at the bar in which I work, there's an unofficial rule
 that all of our door staff must have names that start
 with D or rhyme with 'doorman', which has led to me be-
 friending a trio of six foot four men with beards called
 Doorman Logan, Doorman Drew, and Doorman Dan
 now, let me tell you now that Doorman Dan is the abso-
 lute love of my life. I don't care that he's a decade older
 than me and has a fiance. you know when someone
 is so extraordinary or impossible to define that they're
 simply referred to as 'a character? that's Doorman Dan.
 now, before I get into his personality, let's describe his
 appearance. imagine the most stereotypical Scand
 inavian person ever: tall, white-blond, strong-jawed. now,
 add a heavy South Walian accent and an orange jumper.
 that's Doorman Dan.
 since meeting him last year, I've discovered
 .he once had a dream that he had a tattoo that
 said 'shit happens' on his left arsecheek, so when
 he woke up he decided he had to fulfil the prophecy
 and got it tattooed on his arse by a bloke called
 Junkie Jeff at 9AM
 .he forgot to call his girlfriend for three months
 while he was in the army, and was complet
 unaware they had broken up until he wishe
 happy Christmas and she responded with what the
 fuck Dan
 .accidentally married his army buddy in Vegas for
 thirty-six hours
 .he saw someone beating up a guy for being gay,
 and instead of jumping in and fighting back he
 decided to get absolutely bollock-naked and stand
 in front of the homophobe until he got freaked out
 and ran off
 .he has a millionare buddy who rings him up once a
 month for 'mystery adventures', one of which has
 resulted in Doorman Dan no longer being allowed
 inside any John Lewis shops
 .he is convinced the love of his life is not his
 fiancee, but a man named Ned. upon being asked
 who Ned is, he shrugged and responded with: "TII
 know when I meet him.
 .he runs an Instagram account dedicated to his pet
 rabbits and refuses to let people into the bar unless
 they follow him
 his fiancee booked a wedding venue before he even
 proposed. "I don't even know if I'm invited, truth be
 told."
 when he caught a couple having sex in our loos, he
 didn't want to intrude so he just gently knocked on
 the door and asked if they'd like a snack
 .
 .he has created his own non-alcoholic cocktail
 called Doorman's Sunrise because he feels left out
 being the only person on the dance floor without a
 drink when he's patrolling the bar
 I could honestly write a ten-season sitcom about him
 cacen
 BIG OL UPDATE: HE GOT MARRIED LAST WEEK!!!!
 zohbugg
 I need 10 seasons and a movie about the life of
 Doorman Dan
 thecheshirecass
 I look forward to reading more about the loving,
 polyamorous relationship he and his wife develop with
 Ned when they finally meet.
 fuckveahdiomedes
 What's the instagram for the rabbits, op?
 Source: cacen
 114,993 notes
The adventures of doorman dan

The adventures of doorman dan

Fiance: First thing after being released from prison? DMX headed to breakfast with his son and fiancé. tmz dmx music
Fiance: First thing after being released from prison? DMX headed to breakfast with his son and fiancé. tmz dmx music

First thing after being released from prison? DMX headed to breakfast with his son and fiancé. tmz dmx music

Fiance: thehumon It has come to my attention that most people don't know this about Simon Pegg and Nick Frost and that's a goddamn crime against humanity. Back when they were young and poor they had to share a single person bed for six months. As Pegg put it, they started out sleeping head to feet, but after kicking each other in the face one too many times they started sleeping head to head. It wasn't long after that that they gave up on being macho "no touchy dudes and just snuggled up during bedtime. In the morning they "couldn't tell where one began and the other ended That's why they're so cuddly today. They're so physically close that it worried Frost's fiance at the time and she asked them to never share a bed again after she got married to Frost. The night before the wedding Frost wasn't allowed to see her anyway, so Pegg dropped by his house so they could share a bed one last time (Frost since got a divorce though). Pegg's wife has no objections to any of this. If it's important to her hubby, who is she to judge. Pegg recommend all male friends to try sharing a bed. If it turns out you want to fuck each other, great, you're going to have a lot of fun. If you don't want to fuck each other, well, then nothing happens anyway. (Side note: That's also why there's so many photos of Edgar Wright cuddling up to various guys. He learned that from Pegg and Frost. They created a cuddle monster that can't be stopped) Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome
Fiance: thehumon
 It has come to my attention that most people don't know this about Simon Pegg
 and Nick Frost and that's a goddamn crime against humanity.
 Back when they were young and poor they had to share a single person bed for
 six months. As Pegg put it, they started out sleeping head to feet, but after
 kicking each other in the face one too many times they started sleeping head to
 head. It wasn't long after that that they gave up on being macho "no touchy
 dudes and just snuggled up during bedtime. In the morning they "couldn't tell
 where one began and the other ended
 That's why they're so cuddly today. They're so physically close that it worried
 Frost's fiance at the time and she asked them to never share a bed again after
 she got married to Frost. The night before the wedding Frost wasn't allowed to
 see her anyway, so Pegg dropped by his house so they could share a bed one
 last time (Frost since got a divorce though). Pegg's wife has no objections to any
 of this. If it's important to her hubby, who is she to judge.
 Pegg recommend all male friends to try sharing a bed. If it turns out you want to
 fuck each other, great, you're going to have a lot of fun. If you don't want to fuck
 each other, well, then nothing happens anyway.
 (Side note: That's also why there's so many photos of Edgar Wright cuddling up
 to various guys. He learned that from Pegg and Frost. They created a cuddle
 monster that can't be stopped)
Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome

Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome

Fiance: thehumon It has come to my attention that most people don't know this about Simon Pegg and Nick Frost and that's a goddamn crime against humanity. Back when they were young and poor they had to share a single person bed for six months. As Pegg put it, they started out sleeping head to feet, but after kicking each other in the face one too many times they started sleeping head to head. It wasn't long after that that they gave up on being macho "no touchy dudes and just snuggled up during bedtime. In the morning they "couldn't tell where one began and the other ended That's why they're so cuddly today. They're so physically close that it worried Frost's fiance at the time and she asked them to never share a bed again after she got married to Frost. The night before the wedding Frost wasn't allowed to see her anyway, so Pegg dropped by his house so they could share a bed one last time (Frost since got a divorce though). Pegg's wife has no objections to any of this. If it's important to her hubby, who is she to judge. Pegg recommend all male friends to try sharing a bed. If it turns out you want to fuck each other, great, you're going to have a lot of fun. If you don't want to fuck each other, well, then nothing happens anyway. (Side note: That's also why there's so many photos of Edgar Wright cuddling up to various guys. He learned that from Pegg and Frost. They created a cuddle monster that can't be stopped) Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome
Fiance: thehumon
 It has come to my attention that most people don't know this about Simon Pegg
 and Nick Frost and that's a goddamn crime against humanity.
 Back when they were young and poor they had to share a single person bed for
 six months. As Pegg put it, they started out sleeping head to feet, but after
 kicking each other in the face one too many times they started sleeping head to
 head. It wasn't long after that that they gave up on being macho "no touchy
 dudes and just snuggled up during bedtime. In the morning they "couldn't tell
 where one began and the other ended
 That's why they're so cuddly today. They're so physically close that it worried
 Frost's fiance at the time and she asked them to never share a bed again after
 she got married to Frost. The night before the wedding Frost wasn't allowed to
 see her anyway, so Pegg dropped by his house so they could share a bed one
 last time (Frost since got a divorce though). Pegg's wife has no objections to any
 of this. If it's important to her hubby, who is she to judge.
 Pegg recommend all male friends to try sharing a bed. If it turns out you want to
 fuck each other, great, you're going to have a lot of fun. If you don't want to fuck
 each other, well, then nothing happens anyway.
 (Side note: That's also why there's so many photos of Edgar Wright cuddling up
 to various guys. He learned that from Pegg and Frost. They created a cuddle
 monster that can't be stopped)
Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome

Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are so wholesome