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Bluetooth, Bored, and Cars: . Verizon LTE 12:09 PM a houston.craigslist.org image 1 of 23 TEXAS BNL-2934 You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever compliment you on? Well look no further. The 1999 Toyota Corolla Let's talk about features Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope Fancy wheels: nope Rear view camera: nope...but it's got a transparent rear window and you have a fucking neck that can turn Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I didn't give a shit and ignored it. It went away. The End You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would fucking start right This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children Things this car is old enough to do: Vote: yes Consent to sex: ves Rent a car: it IS a car This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things ın this car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen would Interesting facts This car's exterior color is gray, but it's interior color is grey In the owner's manual, oil is listed as "optional." When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary "Bored to Death: The Story of the 1999 Tovota Corolla" You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook survey. Favorite food: spaghetti Favorite tv show: Alf Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the- road as your grandpa during his last Silver Alert. It's as utilitarian as a member of a church whose scripture is based entirely on water bills When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, "It's a Corolla. It's fine." Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you deserve: The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla. Whit Bayou BWa catchymemes: This man knows how to sell a car
Bluetooth, Bored, and Cars: . Verizon LTE
 12:09 PM
 a houston.craigslist.org
 image 1 of 23
 TEXAS
 BNL-2934
 You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's
 hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever
 compliment you on? Well look no further.

 The 1999 Toyota Corolla
 Let's talk about features
 Bluetooth: nope
 Sunroof: nope
 Fancy wheels: nope
 Rear view camera: nope...but it's got a transparent rear
 window and you have a fucking neck that can turn
 Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a
 strange sound. I didn't give a shit and ignored it. It went
 away. The End
 You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the
 Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years
 later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with
 Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would fucking start right
 This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children
 Things this car is old enough to do:
 Vote: yes
 Consent to sex: ves
 Rent a car: it IS a car
 This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done
 straight things in this car. People have done gay things ın this
 car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen
 would

 Interesting facts
 This car's exterior color is gray, but it's interior color is grey
 In the owner's manual, oil is listed as "optional."
 When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it
 caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The
 resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building
 caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The
 event is chronicled in the documentary "Bored to Death: The
 Story of the 1999 Tovota Corolla"
 You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a
 Facebook survey.
 Favorite food: spaghetti
 Favorite tv show: Alf
 Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms
 This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the-
 road as your grandpa during his last Silver Alert. It's as
 utilitarian as a member of a church whose scripture is based
 entirely on water bills
 When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece
 of paper that said, "It's a Corolla. It's fine."
 Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty
 contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop
 lying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you
 deserve: The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla.
 Whit
 Bayou
 BWa
catchymemes:

This man knows how to sell a car

catchymemes: This man knows how to sell a car

Anna, Ariel, and Ass: WWw.missho1IS-P misshollyslair: *** Please support me by buying me a Ko-fi ! Tips help me make art for pure enjoyment like this piece :) Plus you’ll get a little something by mail if you tip me 3 Ko-fis or more ! https://ko-fi.com/missholly ***This is my remake of Winterhalter’s painting of Empress Eugenie and her ladies in waiting. If you’ve followed me for quite some time, you’ll remember I made a first version of this painting a few years ago, in 2013 to be precise, which I still like a lot (https://www.deviantart.com/hollybell/art/Princess-Tea-Party-417118671). It was already a bit ambitious for me at the time, and you’ll notice I took quite some shortcuts here and there, especially with the background. Because of that, and because I never got around to take part in the improvement meme that circulated a while ago, I decided to make a new updated version ! I had been wanting to do it for a long time, and recent events made it possible for me to set aside enough time to make it happen.You’ll notice I changed the princesses who appear in the image. There’s no particular reason behind it, but if I had to give one I’d say it’s just to suit my current taste better :) For instance, I can’t remember why I picked Snow White at the time, because she’s not one of my favs. My favorite princesses are Belle and Ariel, so they stay in the front spots :) I also love Giselle, and I have sweet spots for Moana and Rapunzel. Except this time I gave her her long hair for a change. Tiana kicks ass so I really wanted her to stay too, and I also adore Mulan so she just HAD to be there. The two women in the bottom right corner in Winterhalter’s painting seem to have a closer relationship, and it just seemed that it would be perfect for sisters. I hesitated because there are other girls I like way more than Anna and Elsa but it seemed more consistent that way. And bonus point, an excuse to add glitter ! \o/A couple of questions I get often :« Why is [insert other princess] not here ? »Well, if you look at Winterhalter’s painting, you’ll notice there are only 9 women, and so I had to stick to that. So yeah, obviously that’s not enough room to draw everyone. I picked the princesses I liked best or wanted to draw at that point, but feel free to make your own version with the ones you like !« Why so much watermark ? It ruins the piece ! »Because I’m really done with my stuff being stolen, cropped and savagely reposted on pages with no credit. Artists make art for everybody to enjoy, the least one can do is respect their hard work and always credit. Credit is vital to us because it gets us out there and enables clients to find us. DON’T REPOST WITHOUT PROPER CREDIT (name and link), AND DON’T CROP. Please and thank you.
Anna, Ariel, and Ass: WWw.missho1IS-P
misshollyslair:

*** Please support me by buying me a Ko-fi ! Tips help me make art for pure enjoyment like this piece :) Plus you’ll get a little something by mail if you tip me 3 Ko-fis or more ! https://ko-fi.com/missholly ***This is my remake of Winterhalter’s painting of Empress Eugenie and her ladies in waiting. If you’ve followed me for quite some time, you’ll remember I made a first version of this painting a few years ago, in 2013 to be precise, which I still like a lot (https://www.deviantart.com/hollybell/art/Princess-Tea-Party-417118671). It was already a bit ambitious for me at the time, and you’ll notice I took quite some shortcuts here and there, especially with the background. Because of that, and because I never got around to take part in the improvement meme that circulated a while ago, I decided to make a new updated version ! I had been wanting to do it for a long time, and recent events made it possible for me to set aside enough time to make it happen.You’ll notice I changed the princesses who appear in the image. There’s no particular reason behind it, but if I had to give one I’d say it’s just to suit my current taste better :) For instance, I can’t remember why I picked Snow White at the time, because she’s not one of my favs. My favorite princesses are Belle and Ariel, so they stay in the front spots :) I also love Giselle, and I have sweet spots for Moana and Rapunzel. Except this time I gave her her long hair for a change. Tiana kicks ass so I really wanted her to stay too, and I also adore Mulan so she just HAD to be there. The two women in the bottom right corner in Winterhalter’s painting seem to have a closer relationship, and it just seemed that it would be perfect for sisters. I hesitated because there are other girls I like way more than Anna and Elsa but it seemed more consistent that way. And bonus point, an excuse to add glitter ! \o/A couple of questions I get often :« Why is [insert other princess] not here ? »Well, if you look at Winterhalter’s painting, you’ll notice there are only 9 women, and so I had to stick to that. So yeah, obviously that’s not enough room to draw everyone. I picked the princesses I liked best or wanted to draw at that point, but feel free to make your own version with the ones you like !« Why so much watermark ? It ruins the piece ! »Because I’m really done with my stuff being stolen, cropped and savagely reposted on pages with no credit. Artists make art for everybody to enjoy, the least one can do is respect their hard work and always credit. Credit is vital to us because it gets us out there and enables clients to find us. DON’T REPOST WITHOUT PROPER CREDIT (name and link), AND DON’T CROP. Please and thank you.

misshollyslair: *** Please support me by buying me a Ko-fi ! Tips help me make art for pure enjoyment like this piece :) Plus you’ll get a ...