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Advice, Django, and Facebook: <?php header("Content-type: text/html; charset=utf-8"); *This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code. *I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing *using a BaseX setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS. The very long BaseX script, very long PHP presenter and very long XSLT *stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I bet they have mismatches somewhere. *Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to *correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice: *Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it *in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment. *Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world * and hope it will be enough. Farewell. error_reporting (E_ALL) ; ini_set("display_errors",true); print('<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF - 8 " ?>'."\n") ; ?> I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.
Advice, Django, and Facebook: <?php header("Content-type: text/html; charset=utf-8");
 *This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code.
 *I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I
 assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons
 I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing
 *using a BaseX setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried
 by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army
 of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS.
 The very long BaseX script, very long PHP presenter and very long XSLT
 *stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for
 different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I
 bet they have mismatches somewhere.
 *Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided
 to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to
 *correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with
 this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally
 given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing
 this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for
 asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a
 manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice:
 *Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it
 *in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a
 relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment.
 *Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world
 * and hope it will be enough.
 Farewell.
 error_reporting (E_ALL) ;
 ini_set("display_errors",true);
 print('<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF - 8 " ?>'."\n") ; ?>
I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.

I’m getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea.

Bad, Children, and Christmas: Karen Green Target 57 minutes ago I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the Lord!!! Like Comment Angela Concepcion about an hour ago Target I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere. Like Comment Chet Stanger Target 3 hours ago With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it. Les Powell 3 hours ago X Target Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more when my friends see this... ADVERTISEMENT that's love BE YOURSELF TOGETHER. whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose: thetrashmouthclub: somethingmissingthiswaycomes: vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story. A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right? It is a big deal because i’m a transman.  It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview. Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews. At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple. At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person. TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life. people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there Looks like I’m going to target. Real men shop at target All corporations are bad but now I’m considering applying to Target. “when you can give equal respects for all of your costumers, then maybe many of us will be back” ma'am………. that’s exactly what they’re doing At target you can order a special name tag from HR with your pronouns on it! Officially printed on there and everything!!!!! Target just got +1000000 respect
Bad, Children, and Christmas: Karen Green Target
 57 minutes ago
 I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at
 your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the
 Lord!!!
 Like Comment

 Angela Concepcion
 about an hour ago
 Target
 I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I
 have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a
 Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash
 her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not
 allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not
 carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will
 encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give
 equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us
 will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere.
 Like Comment

 Chet Stanger Target
 3 hours ago
 With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've
 lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to
 such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it.

 Les Powell
 3 hours ago
 X
 Target
 Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more
 when my friends see this...
 ADVERTISEMENT
 that's love
 BE YOURSELF
 TOGETHER.
whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose:

thetrashmouthclub:
somethingmissingthiswaycomes:

vision-rights:

subject-to-my-fandoms:

tehrogue:

norsegays:

astrolope:

People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook.

I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story.
A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right?
It is a big deal because i’m a transman. 
It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview.
Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews.
At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple.
At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person.
TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life.

people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there


Looks like I’m going to target. 


Real men shop at target


All corporations are bad but now I’m considering applying to Target. 


“when you can give equal respects for all of your costumers, then maybe many of us will be back” ma'am………. that’s exactly what they’re doing


At target you can order a special name tag from HR with your pronouns on it! Officially printed on there and everything!!!!!

Target just got +1000000 respect

whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose: thetrashmouthclub: somethingmissingthiswaycomes: vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays:...

Facebook, Target, and Tumblr: thecryptocreep: catchymemes: Snowing at sea Why do I never think about the possibility of snow on the ocean???Now I see why, because it’s too ethereal
Facebook, Target, and Tumblr: thecryptocreep:
catchymemes:
Snowing at sea
Why do I never think about the possibility of snow on the ocean???Now I see why, because it’s too ethereal

thecryptocreep: catchymemes: Snowing at sea Why do I never think about the possibility of snow on the ocean???Now I see why, because it’s to...

Animals, Apparently, and Comfortable: did you know? When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He soon left town to visit family, but when he finally returned, she danced on his arm, put her head on his shoulder, and hugged him with her wings. PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods. “For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.” Source Source 2 no no no no no this owl is not a happy owl this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open. when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes. I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her. This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing. It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story! This! This 100 times over! UGH. I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth. No. It’s not ‘cute’. That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period. Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/ Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.
Animals, Apparently, and Comfortable: did you know?
 When GiGi the horned owl sustained
 a near-fatal head injury, she was
 nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky
 at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He
 soon left town to visit family, but when
 he finally returned, she danced on his
 arm, put her head on his shoulder, and
 hugged him with her wings.
 PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE
 DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM
wingedpredators:
birds-and-pizza:

talons-mcbeak:

did-you-kno:

When GiGi the horned owl sustained 
a near-fatal head injury, she was 
nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky 
at an animal rescue in Mississippi.
When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods.
“For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.”
Source Source 2

no no no no no
this owl is not a happy owl
this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury
this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls
apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival
believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open.
when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes.

I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said

This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her.

This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. 
That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing.

It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story!


This!
This 100 times over!
UGH.
I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth.
No.
It’s not ‘cute’. 
That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period.
Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/
Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.

wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nurs...

Children, Christmas, and Facebook: Karen Green Target 57 minutes ago I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the Lord!!! Like Comment Angela Concepcion about an hour ago Target I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere. Like Comment Chet Stanger Target 3 hours ago With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it. Les Powell 3 hours ago X Target Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more when my friends see this... ADVERTISEMENT that's love BE YOURSELF TOGETHER. vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story. A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right? It is a big deal because i’m a transman.  It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview. Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews. At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple. At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person. TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life. people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there Looks like I’m going to target. Real men shop at target
Children, Christmas, and Facebook: Karen Green Target
 57 minutes ago
 I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at
 your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the
 Lord!!!
 Like Comment

 Angela Concepcion
 about an hour ago
 Target
 I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I
 have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a
 Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash
 her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not
 allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not
 carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will
 encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give
 equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us
 will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere.
 Like Comment

 Chet Stanger Target
 3 hours ago
 With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've
 lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to
 such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it.

 Les Powell
 3 hours ago
 X
 Target
 Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more
 when my friends see this...
 ADVERTISEMENT
 that's love
 BE YOURSELF
 TOGETHER.
vision-rights:
subject-to-my-fandoms:

tehrogue:

norsegays:

astrolope:

People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook.

I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story.
A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right?
It is a big deal because i’m a transman. 
It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview.
Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews.
At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple.
At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person.
TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life.

people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there


Looks like I’m going to target. 


Real men shop at target

vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I just ...

Facebook, Orcas, and Taken: rhubarbes: Orcas breaching in rough seas. Photo taken from a sword fishing boat off the coast of Nova Scotia.via Earth Pictures
Facebook, Orcas, and Taken: rhubarbes:

Orcas breaching in rough seas. Photo taken from a sword fishing boat off the coast of Nova Scotia.via Earth Pictures

rhubarbes: Orcas breaching in rough seas. Photo taken from a sword fishing boat off the coast of Nova Scotia.via Earth Pictures

Africa, Bitch, and Bruh: i IHLAYANEWS.COM Hotel cleaner who stole sperm from a used condom won child support battle nunyabizni: nunyabizni: lastsonlost: yeahiwasintheshit: okayysophia: uncleromeo: bruh Shoot this bitch. Shoot this bitch right fucking now. Looking around for more mainstream sources on this, most seem to be news services in Africa, but I did come across this gem that doesn’t seem to grasp the implications of this situation. HILLARIOUS….A Woman Who Impregnated Herself With A Stolen Used Condom Wins US$3Million In Child Support Battle. Because obviously this is funny as hell and not a tragic exploitation of the US justice system. Dude’s got money, I hope he sues her into oblivion and takes his kid back if this is a legit story, I’m still mildly iffy since some of the details change from article to article. Oh thank God skepticism wins this round @lastsonlosthttps://www.truthorfiction.com/hotel-cleaner-who-stole-sperm-from-a-millionaires-used-condom-won-child-support-battle-millions/In its apparent first iteration, the claim was shared by the site ihlayanews.com on November 9 2019. That site claimed::A 40-year-old Las Vegas hotel cleaner won a child support battle against a 28-year-old millionaire who she never slept with.ect.Ihlaya News’ header has faint text reading “nuusparodie waarvan jy hou,” which was translated by Africa Check:“Ihlaya News” roughly translates, from isiZulu, as “crazy person news”. The site’s tagline is “nuusparodie waarvan jy hou” – Afrikaans for “news parody that you like”.When Ihlaya News (“crazy person news”) published “Hotel cleaner who stole sperm from a used condom won child support battle” on November 9 2019, faint “satire” signifiers appeared on that first iteration. When numerous outlets in Africa shared it, those details were stripped away, as was the case with screenshots of the “news” on Facebook. However, the claim originated with an openly satirical site.TL:DR; story came from a satire site and a bunch of African news sources “ate the onion” as it were. That’s a relief
Africa, Bitch, and Bruh: i
 IHLAYANEWS.COM
 Hotel cleaner who stole sperm from a used condom
 won child support battle
nunyabizni:

nunyabizni:
lastsonlost:

yeahiwasintheshit:


okayysophia:

uncleromeo:


bruh





Shoot this bitch. Shoot this bitch right fucking now.

Looking around for more mainstream sources on this, most seem to be news services in Africa, but I did come across this gem that doesn’t seem to grasp the implications of this situation.

HILLARIOUS….A Woman Who Impregnated Herself With A Stolen Used Condom Wins US$3Million In Child Support Battle. 

Because obviously this is funny as hell and not a tragic exploitation of the US justice system.
Dude’s got money, I hope he sues her into oblivion and takes his kid back if this is a legit story, I’m still mildly iffy since some of the details change from article to article.

Oh thank God skepticism wins this round @lastsonlosthttps://www.truthorfiction.com/hotel-cleaner-who-stole-sperm-from-a-millionaires-used-condom-won-child-support-battle-millions/In its apparent first iteration, the claim was shared by the site ihlayanews.com on November 9 2019. That site claimed::A 40-year-old Las Vegas hotel cleaner won a child support battle against a 28-year-old millionaire who she never slept with.ect.Ihlaya News’ header has faint text reading “nuusparodie waarvan jy hou,” which was translated by Africa Check:“Ihlaya
 News” roughly translates, from isiZulu, as “crazy person news”. The 
site’s tagline is “nuusparodie waarvan jy hou” – Afrikaans for “news 
parody that you like”.When Ihlaya News (“crazy 
person news”) published “Hotel cleaner who stole sperm from a used 
condom won child support battle” on November 9 2019, faint “satire” 
signifiers appeared on that first iteration. When numerous outlets in 
Africa shared it, those details were stripped away, as was the case with
 screenshots of the “news” on Facebook. However, the claim originated 
with an openly satirical site.TL:DR; story came from a satire site and a bunch of African news sources “ate the onion” as it were.

That’s a relief

nunyabizni: nunyabizni: lastsonlost: yeahiwasintheshit: okayysophia: uncleromeo: bruh Shoot this bitch. Shoot this bitch right f...