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Cars, Children, and Club: 20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 1. 2. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In". 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds". 6. 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy". 8. Don't use any punctuation. 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go". 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme. 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM Scream "I Won! I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 20. Suck in some helium from a balloon, walk behind someone and say "follow the yellow brick road" laughoutloud-club: Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
Cars, Children, and Club: 20 Ways To Maintain A
 Healthy Level Of Insanity
 At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car
 With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At
 Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
 1.
 2. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends
 You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're
 Not In The Mood.
 3.
 Every Time Someone Asks You To Do
 Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
 4.
 Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And
 Label it "In".
 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3
 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over
 Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to
 Espresso
 In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks,
 Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
 6.
 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In
 Accordance With The Prophecy".
 8. Don't use any punctuation.
 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than
 Walk.
 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out
 to eat, with a serious face.
 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is
 "To Go".
 12. Sing Along At The Opera.
 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The
 Poems Don't Rhyme.
 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work
 Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
 15. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't
 Disguise Your Voice.
 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By
 Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM
 Scream "I Won! I Won!"
 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running
 Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For
 Your Lives! They're Loose!"
 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To
 The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let
 One Of You Go."
 20. Suck in some helium from a balloon, walk
 behind someone and say "follow the yellow
 brick road"
laughoutloud-club:

Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

laughoutloud-club: Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Trump rallies and then asked it to write a Trump rally of its own. Here is the first page TRUMP RALLY INT. BIG ARBY 'S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium PRESIDENT TRUMP I just had a phone call with the economy. Jobs poured out of the phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. steve Jobs. All at Kinko's The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive) PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) The United Snakes is doing so good. other countries are on fire. All the people on fire. Hot fire too. Not us. Our flag is so beautiful. President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America. PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) I signed a bill. No more swamp. Swamp gone. Swamp is in Mexico now. It's on fire. Great deal for us The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS! FOUR MORE SWAMPS! PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) Foreign powers cheat us Canada steals our milk. China steals our milk. We only had one glass of milk left! Obama drank it. Not fair The crowd b s. They wanted that milk PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) But like President Ronald Rogaine, I will bring back the milk! The crowd roars. They still want that milk PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) A wall of milk. No criminals get through. Democrats want criminals to have the milk. No way. Milk comes from coal. We'll dig it up. All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging ARBY’S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT via /r/memes https://ift.tt/2xfvrxE
Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti
 @KeatonPatti
 I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours
 of Trump rallies and then asked it to
 write a Trump rally of its own. Here is the
 first page
 TRUMP RALLY
 INT. BIG ARBY 'S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA
 PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium
 PRESIDENT TRUMP
 I just had a phone call with the
 economy. Jobs poured out of the
 phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. steve
 Jobs. All at Kinko's
 The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard
 hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive)
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 The United Snakes is doing so good.
 other countries are on fire. All
 the people on fire. Hot fire too.
 Not us. Our flag is so beautiful.
 President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE
 TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America.
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 I signed a bill. No more swamp.
 Swamp gone. Swamp is in Mexico now.
 It's on fire. Great deal for us
 The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS! FOUR MORE SWAMPS!
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 Foreign powers cheat us Canada
 steals our milk. China steals our
 milk. We only had one glass of milk
 left! Obama drank it. Not fair
 The crowd b s. They wanted that milk
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 But like President Ronald Rogaine,
 I will bring back the milk!
 The crowd roars. They still want that milk
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 A wall of milk. No criminals get
 through. Democrats want criminals
 to have the milk. No way. Milk
 comes from coal. We'll dig it up.
 All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They
 hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging
ARBY’S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT via /r/memes https://ift.tt/2xfvrxE

ARBY’S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT via /r/memes https://ift.tt/2xfvrxE

Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Trump rallies and then asked it to write a Trump rally of its own. Here is the first page TRUMP RALLY INT. BIG ARBY'S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium. The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS FOUR MORE SWAMPS! PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) Foreign powers cheat us! canada steals our milk. China steals our PRESIDENT TRUMP milk. We only had one glass of milk left! Obama drank it. Not fair I just had a phone call with the economy. Jobs poured out of the phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. Steve Jobs. All at Kinko's. The crowd boos. They wanted that milk PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive But like President Ronald Rogaine, I will bring back the milk! PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) The United Snakes is doing so good other countries are on fire. All the people on fire. Hot fire too. Not us. Our flag is Bo beautiful. The crowd roars. They still want that milk PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) A wall of milk. No criminals get through. Democrats want criminals to have the milk. No way. Milk comes from coal. We'1l dig it up. President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) I signed a bill. No more swamp Swamp gone. swamp is in Mexico now It's on fire. Great deal for us All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging. This is glorious
Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti
 @KeatonPatti
 I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours
 of Trump rallies and then asked it to write
 a Trump rally of its own. Here is the first
 page
 TRUMP RALLY
 INT. BIG ARBY'S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA
 PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium.
 The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS FOUR MORE SWAMPS!
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 Foreign powers cheat us! canada
 steals our milk. China steals our
 PRESIDENT TRUMP
 milk. We only had one glass of milk
 left! Obama drank it. Not fair
 I just had a phone call with the
 economy. Jobs poured out of the
 phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. Steve
 Jobs. All at Kinko's.
 The crowd boos. They wanted that milk
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard
 hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive
 But like President Ronald Rogaine,
 I will bring back the milk!
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 The United Snakes is doing so good
 other countries are on fire. All
 the people on fire. Hot fire too.
 Not us. Our flag is Bo beautiful.
 The crowd roars. They still want that milk
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 A wall of milk. No criminals get
 through. Democrats want criminals
 to have the milk. No way. Milk
 comes from coal. We'1l dig it up.
 President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE
 TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 I signed a bill. No more swamp
 Swamp gone. swamp is in Mexico now
 It's on fire. Great deal for us
 All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They
 hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging.
This is glorious

This is glorious

Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Trump rallies and then asked it to write a Trump rally of its own. Here is the first page TRUMP RALLY INT. BIG ARBY S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS! FOUR MORE SWAMPS! PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) LT Foreign powers cheat us! Canada steals our milk. China steals our PRESIDENT TRUMP milk. We only had one glass of milk left! Obama drank it. Not fair I just had a phone call with the economy. Jobs poured out of the phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. Steve Jobs. All at Kinko's. The crowd boos. They wanted that milk The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive) PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) But like President Ronald Rogaine, I will bring back the milk! PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D The United Snakes is doing so other countries are on fire. All the people on fire. Hot fire too. Not us. our flag is Bo beautiful The crowd roars. They still want that milk PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D) A wall of milk. No criminals get through. Democrats want criminals to have the milk. No way. Milk comes from coal. We'1l dig it up President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America. PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D) I signed a bil1. No more swamp Sw All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging. . Swamp is in Mexico now. amp gone It's on fire. Great deal for us. Omfg this is so worth the read I’m crying and want milk now @donny.drama 😩😭
Alive, America, and Beautiful: Keaton Patti
 @KeatonPatti
 I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours
 of Trump rallies and then asked it to write
 a Trump rally of its own. Here is the first
 page
 TRUMP RALLY
 INT. BIG ARBY S IN SOUTH WYOMKLAHOMA
 PRESIDENT TRUMP forces himself on a podium
 The crowd chants: FOUR MORE SWAMPS! FOUR MORE SWAMPS!
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 LT
 Foreign powers cheat us! Canada
 steals our milk. China steals our
 PRESIDENT TRUMP
 milk. We only had one glass of milk
 left! Obama drank it. Not fair
 I just had a phone call with the
 economy. Jobs poured out of the
 phone. Great jobs. Tall jobs. Steve
 Jobs. All at Kinko's.
 The crowd boos. They wanted that milk
 The crowd cheers. It is full of real Americans (man with hard
 hat, man with harder hat, gun that is alive)
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 But like President Ronald Rogaine,
 I will bring back the milk!
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D
 The United Snakes is doing so
 other countries are on fire. All
 the people on fire. Hot fire too.
 Not us. our flag is Bo beautiful
 The crowd roars. They still want that milk
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT'D)
 A wall of milk. No criminals get
 through. Democrats want criminals
 to have the milk. No way. Milk
 comes from coal. We'1l dig it up
 President Trump salutes a flag that says: ARBY'S FOOD IS FINE
 TO EAT. The crowd howls. They love this flag of America.
 PRESIDENT TRUMP (CONT D)
 I signed a bil1. No more swamp
 Sw
 All of the words are mispronounced. The crowd cheers. They
 hate pronunciations. They love milk. They start digging.
 . Swamp is in Mexico now.
 amp gone
 It's on fire. Great deal for us.
Omfg this is so worth the read I’m crying and want milk now @donny.drama 😩😭

Omfg this is so worth the read I’m crying and want milk now @donny.drama 😩😭

Anaconda, Family, and Homeless: fandomsandfeminism Thought: I do NOT think that 50% of the world's bilionaires should be WO- men. I think there shouldn't be any billionaires at all cardboardfacewoman So you are saying 0% of the world should be billionaires? fandomsandfeminism Yes caosdth Why shouldn't their be billionaires? That makes no sense. fandomsandfeminism Because the existence of billionaires is predicated on the exploitation of human labor and unsustainable 4G the exploitation of human labor and unsustainable environmental harm. That level of wealth hoarding is harmful to economies, as it reduces the amount of mo- ney in circulation. No one person, no family, could ever conceivably even SPEND a billion dollars anyway, and it is inherently immoral to accumulate wealth so narrowly while so much of the world lives in abject poverty Better then to create a wealth ceiling, a point at which all wealth over a certain point is taxed at or very near 100% to incentivize people to actually spend their mo- ney rather than hoard it, stimulating the economy and bettering the lives of far more people. Better even still to create and regulate economic systems that protect wor- kers and the environment in a way that such extreme levels of wealth accumulation aren't even feasible. aflawedmind The problem with this is that it reduces the incentive to actually do fiscally well. What's the point of starting a business if you can't become wealthy? fandomsandfeminism There is a very real difference between "reasonably wealthy" and A BILLIONAIRE twodotsknowwhy wealthy" and A BILLIONAIRE twodotsknowwhy No one is saying you shouldn't have a nice house, we are saying that having multiple really, really ridiculously nice houses while your employees are either homeless or at serious risk of becoming homeless is immoral whenandwhereienter I'll never understand why this concept is hard for people. I think it's because they can't actually fathom how much $1 Billion is fandomsandfeminism Seriously Lets say you have a badass job. A great job. You make $100 AN HOUR. You work 10 hours a day ($1000 A DAY), 5 days a week ($5000 a week!!), every week ($20,000 A MONTH), thats $240,000 Every Year. It would take you 4,167 years to make a billion dollars Fuente: fandomsandfeminism 129,277 notas Excessive wealth comes from excessive misery.
Anaconda, Family, and Homeless: fandomsandfeminism
 Thought: I do NOT think
 that 50% of the world's
 bilionaires should be WO-
 men. I think there shouldn't
 be any billionaires at all
 cardboardfacewoman
 So you are saying 0% of the world should be
 billionaires?
 fandomsandfeminism
 Yes
 caosdth
 Why shouldn't their be billionaires? That makes no
 sense.
 fandomsandfeminism
 Because the existence of billionaires is predicated on
 the exploitation of human labor and unsustainable

 4G
 the exploitation of human labor and unsustainable
 environmental harm. That level of wealth hoarding is
 harmful to economies, as it reduces the amount of mo-
 ney in circulation. No one person, no family, could ever
 conceivably even SPEND a billion dollars anyway, and it
 is inherently immoral to accumulate wealth so narrowly
 while so much of the world lives in abject poverty
 Better then to create a wealth ceiling, a point at which
 all wealth over a certain point is taxed at or very near
 100% to incentivize people to actually spend their mo-
 ney rather than hoard it, stimulating the economy and
 bettering the lives of far more people. Better even still to
 create and regulate economic systems that protect wor-
 kers and the environment in a way that such extreme
 levels of wealth accumulation aren't even feasible.
 aflawedmind
 The problem with this is that it reduces the incentive to
 actually do fiscally well. What's the point of starting a
 business if you can't become wealthy?
 fandomsandfeminism
 There is a very real difference between "reasonably
 wealthy" and A BILLIONAIRE
 twodotsknowwhy

 wealthy" and A BILLIONAIRE
 twodotsknowwhy
 No one is saying you shouldn't have a nice house, we
 are saying that having multiple really, really ridiculously
 nice houses while your employees are either homeless
 or at serious risk of becoming homeless is immoral
 whenandwhereienter
 I'll never understand why this concept is hard for
 people. I think it's because they can't actually fathom
 how much $1 Billion is
 fandomsandfeminism
 Seriously
 Lets say you have a badass job. A great job. You make
 $100 AN HOUR. You work 10 hours a day ($1000 A
 DAY), 5 days a week ($5000 a week!!), every week
 ($20,000 A MONTH), thats $240,000 Every Year.
 It would take you 4,167 years to make a billion dollars
 Fuente: fandomsandfeminism
 129,277 notas
Excessive wealth comes from excessive misery.

Excessive wealth comes from excessive misery.