🔥 | Latest

Be Like, Club, and Dad: factfiction emiliusthegreat Follow partybarackisinthehousetonight releases pack of dads into home depot* go....be free hotcommunist invasive species encroach on lesbian territory dreaming-shark This is a common misconception because they're such similar environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe's. At this point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at home in both Home Depot and Lowe's to the point that trying to separate them back into their original ranges would probably do more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores. ailithnight A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfort- able cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really "encroaching on another's territory". You wouldn't say that about foxes in a forest that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It's just two different species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals, Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation. Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a or Home Depot, that's where chaos will reign. Being adap far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It would be like releasing bears at a country club. chequerootlurks As a former timber-harveste... I feel this is potentially accurate in theory. But highly improbable in actuality. Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require more space than the average hardware store, even a big box store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a social species because of how they often work and live together. This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival technique for thriving under the Log Boss. A "pack" of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental pressure of a Log Boss will naturally disperse until they each have a wide territory Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory. One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian, however the latter tend to travel in social packs. Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch Getting a "pack" of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred. Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware system. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably peaceful unless threatened. katy-l-wood As a hardware store worker I can say that this is all 100% accurate. The delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores
Be Like, Club, and Dad: factfiction
 emiliusthegreat Follow
 partybarackisinthehousetonight
 releases pack of dads into home depot* go....be free
 hotcommunist
 invasive species encroach on lesbian territory
 dreaming-shark
 This is a common misconception because they're such similar
 environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to
 Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe's. At this
 point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at
 home in both Home Depot and Lowe's to the point that trying to
 separate them back into their original ranges would probably do
 more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain
 hardware stores.
 ailithnight
 A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfort-
 able cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really "encroaching on
 another's territory". You wouldn't say that about foxes in a forest
 that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It's just two different
 species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same
 environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals,
 Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation.
 Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a
 or Home Depot, that's where chaos will reign. Being adap
 far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks
 would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also
 consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It
 would be like releasing bears at a country club.
 chequerootlurks
 As a former timber-harveste... I feel this is potentially accurate in
 theory. But highly improbable in actuality.
 Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require
 more space than the average hardware store, even a big box
 store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a
 social species because of how they often work and live together.
 This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival
 technique for thriving under the Log Boss.
 A "pack" of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental
 pressure of a Log Boss will naturally disperse until they each have
 a wide territory
 Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory.
 One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian,
 however the latter tend to travel in social packs.
 Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large
 numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch
 Getting a "pack" of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard
 enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a
 LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and
 potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This
 artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok
 If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred.
 Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware
 system. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive
 Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social
 predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably
 peaceful unless threatened.
 katy-l-wood
 As a hardware store worker I can say that this is all 100%
 accurate.
The delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores

The delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores

Food, Gym, and Meme: nunia: retro-leigh: THEY PUT RAMMSTEIN INTO A BONGO CAT MEME YALL the one i want Me demanding food after gym
Food, Gym, and Meme: nunia:
retro-leigh:
THEY PUT RAMMSTEIN INTO A BONGO CAT MEME YALL
the one i want


Me demanding food after gym

nunia: retro-leigh: THEY PUT RAMMSTEIN INTO A BONGO CAT MEME YALL the one i want Me demanding food after gym

Bodies , Chipotle, and Girl Scouts: PS Products A 10 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster ea List Price: $69.99 Price: $62.54 Victory! By tdoog- May 5, 2013 I purchased this after I was confronted by punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them. That is when I realized that I need to protect myself. The day after I bought this product I went to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was first mugged. I approached the group of hooligans standing outside the entrance, concealing my secret weapon. some I cooly asked "Remember me?" One of them looked up and said, "Have you com back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi Scout Troop needs to raise more money!" I replied with "you're not taking my money this time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said. I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri scouts ran away screaming. As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym. As the others began to circle around me,I changed techniques. Holding both of my hands in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off, fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back up my stomach. I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!" I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my foes, electrocuting them with my teeth. Eventually they were all unconscious, and I walked home victorious. 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful worth the read
Bodies , Chipotle, and Girl Scouts: PS Products
 A 10
 PS Products Knuckle Blaster is a 950,000V Stun Gun
 with Batteries & Magnetic Leather Holster
 ea
 List Price: $69.99
 Price: $62.54
 Victory!
 By tdoog- May 5, 2013
 I purchased this after I was confronted by
 punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm
 a relatively fit guy, but I was no match for them.
 That is when I realized that I need to protect
 myself. The day after I bought this product I went
 to the very same Wal-Mart parking lot when I was
 first mugged. I approached the group of
 hooligans standing outside the entrance,
 concealing my secret weapon.
 some
 I cooly asked "Remember me?"
 One of them looked up and said, "Have you com
 back to buy some Samoas or Thin Mints? My Gi
 Scout Troop needs to raise more money!"
 I replied with "you're not taking my money this
 time". "But sir, they're delicious!", she said.
 I whipped out my Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun hand
 and shouted "WRONG MOVE B****" The five giri
 scouts ran away screaming.
 As I pounded my chest in victory, I accidentally
 activated the stun gun and applied 950,000 Volts
 to my right nipple. I woke up 4 hours later to the
 sound of heavy footsteps. Those Girl Scouts had
 brought their fathers. But I was ready. I lunged at
 the largest one with a cry of "RAGGLE
 FRAGGLE!!!" and hit him in the stomach. He hit
 the ground harder than a fat kid on a jungle gym.
 As the others began to circle around me,I
 changed techniques. Holding both of my hands
 in tight fists, I rased my arms to my sides and
 initiated the helicopter spin. They all backed off,
 fearing my impressive RPM. After a while I
 started getting dizzy, and one of the fathers
 decided to try to tackle me. As he ran to me stood
 there, dizzy and queasy; time was going real
 slow. Then I remembered. I had eaten lunch at
 Chipotle and the burrito was fighting its way back
 up my stomach.
 I tuned toward my enemy and launched a stream
 of projectile vomit at him, knocking him to the
 ground. Then I started singing "Let the bodies hit
 the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies
 hit the.... FLOOO00RRR!!!"
 I grabbed my Knuckle Blasher Stun Gun and
 shoved it into my mouth, running headfirst at my
 foes, electrocuting them with my teeth.
 Eventually they were all unconscious, and I
 walked home victorious.
 2,144 of 2,383 people found this review helpful
worth the read

worth the read

England, Facebook, and Friends: Gay couple beaten up for refusing to kiss for men's entertainment f P Melania Geymonat (R) and her girlfriend Chris were beaten up by a gang of men on a London bus (Picture: Sam Webb) concentrated-sunshine: yayfeminism: A gay couple in London were beaten by a gang of men, after refusing to kiss. One of the women, Melania Getmonat wrote this on facebook: “Last Wednesday, I had a date with Chris. We got on the Night Bus, heading for her place in Camden Town, climbed upstairs and took the front seats. We must have kissed or something because these guys came after us. I don’t remember if they were already there or if they got on after us. There were at least four of them. They started behaving like hooligans, demanding that we kissed so they could enjoy watching, calling us ‘lesbians’ and describing sexual positions. I don’t remember the whole episode, but the word ‘scissors’ stuck in my mind. It was only them and us there. In an attempt to calm things down, I started making jokes. I thought this might make them go away. Chris even pretended she was sick, but they kept on harassing us, throwing us coins and becoming more enthusiastic about it. The next thing I know is that Chris is in the middle of the bus fighting with them. On an impulse, I went over there only to find her face bleeding and three of them beating her up. The next thing I know is I’m being punched. I got dizzy at the sight of my blood and fell back. I don’t remember whether or not I lost consciousness. Suddenly the bus had stopped, the police were there and I was bleeding all over. Our stuff was stolen as well. I don’t know yet if my nose is broken, and I haven’t been able to go back to work, but what upsets me the most is that VIOLENCE HAS BECOME A COMMON THING, that sometimes it’s necessary to see a woman bleeding after having been punched to feel some kind of impact. I’m tired of being taken as a SEXUAL OBJECT, of finding out that these situations are usual, of gay friends who were beaten up JUST BECAUSE. We have to endure verbal harassment AND CHAUVINIST, MISOGYNISTIC AND HOMOPHOBIC VIOLENCE because when you stand up for yourself shit like this happens. By the way, I am thankful to all the women and men in my life that understand that HAVING BALLS MEANS SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. I just hope that in June, Pride Month, stuff like this can be spoken out loudly so they STOP HAPPENING!” Gay couple beaten for refusing to kiss They have CCTV footage of the motherfuckers, put that shit on the met Twitter feed..blast their faces all over the place and you’ll have them in custody by tea time. What the fucking fuck
England, Facebook, and Friends: Gay couple beaten up for refusing to
 kiss for men's entertainment
 f
 P
 Melania Geymonat (R) and her girlfriend Chris were beaten up by a
 gang of men on a London bus (Picture: Sam Webb)
concentrated-sunshine:
yayfeminism:


A gay couple in London were beaten by a gang of men, after refusing to kiss.
One of the women, Melania Getmonat wrote this on facebook:
“Last Wednesday, I had a date with Chris. We got on the Night Bus, heading for her place in Camden Town, climbed upstairs and took the front seats. We must have kissed or something because these guys came after us. I don’t remember if they were already there or if they got on after us. There were at least four of them. They started behaving like hooligans, demanding that we kissed so they could enjoy watching, calling us ‘lesbians’ and describing sexual positions. I don’t remember the whole episode, but the word ‘scissors’ stuck in my mind. It was only them and us there. In an attempt to calm things down, I started making jokes. I thought this might make them go away. Chris even pretended she was sick, but they kept on harassing us, throwing us coins and becoming more enthusiastic about it. The next thing I know is that Chris is in the middle of the bus fighting with them. On an impulse, I went over there only to find her face bleeding and three of them beating her up. The next thing I know is I’m being punched. I got dizzy at the sight of my blood and fell back. I don’t remember whether or not I lost consciousness. Suddenly the bus had stopped, the police were there and I was bleeding all over. Our stuff was stolen as well. I don’t know yet if my nose is broken, and I haven’t been able to go back to work, but what upsets me the most is that VIOLENCE HAS BECOME A COMMON THING, that sometimes it’s necessary to see a woman bleeding after having been punched to feel some kind of impact. I’m tired of being taken as a SEXUAL OBJECT, of finding out that these situations are usual, of gay friends who were beaten up JUST BECAUSE. We have to endure verbal harassment AND CHAUVINIST, MISOGYNISTIC AND HOMOPHOBIC VIOLENCE because when you stand up for yourself shit like this happens. By the way, I am thankful to all the women and men in my life that understand that HAVING BALLS MEANS SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. I just hope that in June, Pride Month, stuff like this can be spoken out loudly so they STOP HAPPENING!”


Gay couple beaten for refusing to kiss
They have CCTV footage of the motherfuckers,  put that shit on the met Twitter feed..blast their faces all over the place and you’ll have them in custody by tea time.


What the fucking fuck

concentrated-sunshine: yayfeminism: A gay couple in London were beaten by a gang of men, after refusing to kiss. One of the women, Melania...

Apparently, Bad, and Children: the "police officers risk their lives to protect us" starter pack Savannah Danielle lol who knew there was something wrong with actually having a car, a nice house and a clean put together family who lives in a safe community while spending your hard earned money on paying your bills rather then expensive sneakers and supporting the authorities of the neighborhood you take pride in Like Reply 11 minutes ago living-for-fiction: unbossed: theflowerfish: saaavx0h: jaime-foxxx: OKAY BUT SOME OFFICERS ACTUALLY DO RISK THEIR FUCKING LIVES. It’s cute how tumblr users are liike “ahhh not all _____ people” but when it’s cops, they’re all awful apparently. Good god.  yes they do and it’s a shame some people don’t recognize or appreciate that! Cops who don’t check and report explicitly bad cops are not good cops. The culture of the blue wall of silence logically makes it so that cops are inherently bad, not good. The good cops who do report their constituents get labeled as rats and get harassed by other cops for snitching or even lose their jobs. The police are nothing more than a glorified gang. Come live in the communities that the police continuously harass, brutalize, and murder then let me know how you feel. Come hang in Philly for a minute, get a taste of how it feels to have the cops hold a magnifying glass over you. Ask my friend who got shot while delivering pizza in Southwest Philly by plainclothes officers who never identified themselves how it felt to have a bullet removed from his face. Or head to Camden where the cops don’t even respond to calls in these communities, and if they do they just show up to beat and arrest the people there. Go to Washington Heights in NYC where they stop and frisk mostly black and Latino men, even though almost 90% of those searches end up with nothing (stats available on NYPD website). Imagine a world where you get stopped and harassed by the police because of where you live or how you look, regardless of whether you’re innocent or not. Then tell me how much you just loooooove the police. Y'all don’t see shit over that white picket fence of yours, do you? The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to evict a homeless family from their car if they’re parked illegally. The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to arrest them, tearing the children from their parents, if they try to sleep in a foreclosed home left empty by the bank as a tax write-off. The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to keep that family from eating food that grocery stores and restaurants throw away in their locked dumpsters. The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to enforce even the most unjust law. And badge lickers will always try to justify the injustice. For the people who missed the point, this post doesn’t say that cops never risk their lives - it’s inviting you to take a good long look at the characteristics of the people they DO protect and risk their lives for, and note that there is a huge disparity in how cops treat people based on race, socioeconomic status, etc. Also I love it when people use “coppin’ is DANGEROUS” to handwave the numerous civil rights violations cops are routinely guilty of in the process of “just following orders”. Plenty of jobs are dangerous. Plenty of jobs are more dangerous than being a cop. But cops seem to be the main ones stomping around demanding endless respect and unquestioning obedience just because their “job is dangerous”.
Apparently, Bad, and Children: the "police officers risk their lives to
 protect us" starter pack

 Savannah Danielle lol who knew there was something wrong with actually
 having a car, a nice house and a clean put together family who lives in a
 safe community while spending your hard earned money on paying your
 bills rather then expensive sneakers and supporting the authorities of the
 neighborhood you take pride in
 Like Reply 11 minutes ago
living-for-fiction:
unbossed:


theflowerfish:

saaavx0h:

jaime-foxxx:

OKAY BUT SOME OFFICERS ACTUALLY DO RISK THEIR FUCKING LIVES.
It’s cute how tumblr users are liike “ahhh not all _____ people” but when it’s cops, they’re all awful apparently. Good god. 

yes they do and it’s a shame some people don’t recognize or appreciate that!

Cops who don’t check and report explicitly bad cops are not good cops. The culture of the blue wall of silence logically makes it so that cops are inherently bad, not good. The good cops who do report their constituents get labeled as rats and get harassed by other cops for snitching or even lose their jobs. The police are nothing more than a glorified gang.
Come live in the communities that the police continuously harass, brutalize, and murder then let me know how you feel. 
Come hang in Philly for a minute, get a taste of how it feels to have the cops hold a magnifying glass over you. Ask my friend who got shot while delivering pizza in Southwest Philly by plainclothes officers who never identified themselves how it felt to have a bullet removed from his face.
Or head to Camden where the cops don’t even respond to calls in these communities, and if they do they just show up to beat and arrest the people there.
Go to Washington Heights in NYC where they stop and frisk mostly black and Latino men, even though almost 90% of those searches end up with nothing (stats available on NYPD website). Imagine a world where you get stopped and harassed by the police because of where you live or how you look, regardless of whether you’re innocent or not. Then tell me how much you just loooooove the police.
Y'all don’t see shit over that white picket fence of yours, do you?


The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to evict a homeless family from their car if they’re parked illegally. The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to arrest them, tearing the children from their parents, if they try to sleep in a foreclosed home left empty by the bank as a tax write-off. The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to keep that family from eating food that grocery stores and restaurants throw away in their locked dumpsters.
The “good cop” going by the book will use violence to enforce even the most unjust law. And badge lickers will always try to justify the injustice.


For the people who missed the point, this post doesn’t say that cops never risk their lives - it’s inviting you to take a good long look at the characteristics of the people they DO protect and risk their lives for, and note that there is a huge disparity in how cops treat people based on race, socioeconomic status, etc.
Also I love it when people use “coppin’ is DANGEROUS” to handwave the numerous civil rights violations cops are routinely guilty of in the process of “just following orders”. Plenty of jobs are dangerous. Plenty of jobs are more dangerous than being a cop. But cops seem to be the main ones stomping around demanding endless respect and unquestioning obedience just because their “job is dangerous”.

living-for-fiction: unbossed: theflowerfish: saaavx0h: jaime-foxxx: OKAY BUT SOME OFFICERS ACTUALLY DO RISK THEIR FUCKING LIVES. It’s c...

Being Alone, Apparently, and Burger King: probablyhalfelfrpgideas vaspider gayquicksilver By the way the local New Zealand drama right now is that there's this family of British tourists in the country right now that have, on their own, been such god awful visitors that the national news and like half the country is following their exploits and they got a deportation notice. Like we literally have nothing else better to do in this country gayquicksilver chaOtician please tell me more They've been in the country 5 fucking days ok not even a week. And it started a few days ago when some people Snapchatted them leaving HEAPS of rubbish behind at Takapuna beach (one of the most expensive suburbs in the country) and people were like "hey can you pick that up" and the family got real aggressive about it including this kid who could not have been more than 5 being like "ill bash ya fookin head in m8" and this was ALL over Facebook and allegedly they were all drunk too Then later this same family was pulled over for their kids not being in proper car seats, so they got taken to the dpt store to buy some, no biggie, but u know the connection was made that this is the same family from earlier in the week Then yesterday the police got called in Hamilton to a Burger King where the SAME FAMILY is like, harassing staff and demanding free food, trying to walk through the drive thru and even after police were called it took like an hour to get them to leave Now one of the woman has been arrested for robbing some sunglasses and soft drinks or something from a gas station ehdhfgrhejehehhs I think there was more stuff. And apparently they were real fucking terrible on the flight here too. But overall the situation is just SO funny, like sure they were rude to retail workers and stole some stuff but the whole country is riled the fuck up because they left rubbish all over our beach and you do NOT get away with that shit equuslupus ris fr New Zealand fucking wild Imao Source: gayquicksilver 45,339 notes Cant the brits just leave everyone alone?
Being Alone, Apparently, and Burger King: probablyhalfelfrpgideas
 vaspider
 gayquicksilver
 By the way the local New Zealand drama
 right now is that there's this family of British
 tourists in the country right now that have, on
 their own, been such god awful visitors that
 the national news and like half the country
 is following their exploits and they got a
 deportation notice. Like we literally have
 nothing else better to do in this country
 gayquicksilver
 chaOtician
 please tell me more
 They've been in the country 5 fucking days
 ok not even a week. And it started a few
 days ago when some people Snapchatted
 them leaving HEAPS of rubbish behind at
 Takapuna beach (one of the most expensive
 suburbs in the country) and people were like
 "hey can you pick that up" and the family got
 real aggressive about it including this kid
 who could not have been more than 5 being
 like "ill bash ya fookin head in m8" and this
 was ALL over Facebook and allegedly they
 were all drunk too
 Then later this same family was pulled over
 for their kids not being in proper car seats,
 so they got taken to the dpt store to buy
 some, no biggie, but u know the connection
 was made that this is the same family from
 earlier in the week
 Then yesterday the police got called in
 Hamilton to a Burger King where the SAME
 FAMILY is like, harassing staff and demanding
 free food, trying to walk through the drive thru
 and even after police were called it took like
 an hour to get them to leave
 Now one of the woman has been arrested
 for robbing some sunglasses and soft
 drinks or something from a gas station
 ehdhfgrhejehehhs
 I think there was more stuff. And apparently
 they were real fucking terrible on the flight
 here too. But overall the situation is just
 SO funny, like sure they were rude to retail
 workers and stole some stuff but the whole
 country is riled the fuck up because they left
 rubbish all over our beach and you do NOT
 get away with that shit
 equuslupus
 ris
 fr
 New Zealand
 fucking wild Imao
 Source: gayquicksilver
 45,339 notes
Cant the brits just leave everyone alone?

Cant the brits just leave everyone alone?