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Af, Ass, and Bad: if you're have a bad day look at this @DrSmashlove Every once in a while, if you're lucky, you find true love. Something you see - feel - taste - and it just feels right. It's new - but, strangely, it's familiar. It generates sensations u haven't felt before in places that haven't been awakened before, and you're eager to see where it goes. I felt this recently and I had to share it with y'all. Once I experienced it, I couldn't get enuf. No I didn't find this love on Tinder or Bumbles or Coffee and Bagel. This was a love much deeper. The type of love u can only find in a poke bowl ๐Ÿ˜. BRUH...Game changer ๐Ÿ˜‚. Life changer. Poke is trendy now so I probably don't need to explain, but, for the uninitiated: this is a raw fish salad that started when Hawaiian fisherman would cobble together all of their fish cuttings from their catches, season it, and eat it. Now it is crafted with love by hipsters with deadstock vintage frames and neck tattoos who wear limited edition Vans and make experimental synth music that they post to their SoundCloud, where they have 984 followers and counting. Poke is the truth bruh. Eat it on a vegetable salad base and u get your vitamins, fiber, and a ton of protein, and it actually tastes good AF. I used to love sushi rolls (and still do) but that's a lot of rice and creamy sauces u don't need. Poke gets right to the point bruh no filler just killer. U feel me? Now the only thing about poke is, unless u live in Hawaii, the shit gon run u. However look at it like this. That Chipotle burrito with guac run u $11. Add $2 and get u something all natural from the sea that will fortify u and give u strength and happiness. U feel me? Eat enough of this shit and u liable to grow big ass muscles like the long haired dude from the Moana movie with the tattoos that move and shit. U feel me? Poke isn't just good food - this shit is true love ๐Ÿ˜. Now go forth and enjoy BLESS UP ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
Af, Ass, and Bad: if you're have a bad day look at this
 @DrSmashlove
Every once in a while, if you're lucky, you find true love. Something you see - feel - taste - and it just feels right. It's new - but, strangely, it's familiar. It generates sensations u haven't felt before in places that haven't been awakened before, and you're eager to see where it goes. I felt this recently and I had to share it with y'all. Once I experienced it, I couldn't get enuf. No I didn't find this love on Tinder or Bumbles or Coffee and Bagel. This was a love much deeper. The type of love u can only find in a poke bowl ๐Ÿ˜. BRUH...Game changer ๐Ÿ˜‚. Life changer. Poke is trendy now so I probably don't need to explain, but, for the uninitiated: this is a raw fish salad that started when Hawaiian fisherman would cobble together all of their fish cuttings from their catches, season it, and eat it. Now it is crafted with love by hipsters with deadstock vintage frames and neck tattoos who wear limited edition Vans and make experimental synth music that they post to their SoundCloud, where they have 984 followers and counting. Poke is the truth bruh. Eat it on a vegetable salad base and u get your vitamins, fiber, and a ton of protein, and it actually tastes good AF. I used to love sushi rolls (and still do) but that's a lot of rice and creamy sauces u don't need. Poke gets right to the point bruh no filler just killer. U feel me? Now the only thing about poke is, unless u live in Hawaii, the shit gon run u. However look at it like this. That Chipotle burrito with guac run u $11. Add $2 and get u something all natural from the sea that will fortify u and give u strength and happiness. U feel me? Eat enough of this shit and u liable to grow big ass muscles like the long haired dude from the Moana movie with the tattoos that move and shit. U feel me? Poke isn't just good food - this shit is true love ๐Ÿ˜. Now go forth and enjoy BLESS UP ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Every once in a while, if you're lucky, you find true love. Something you see - feel - taste - and it just feels right. It's new - but, stra...

Anaconda, Crazy, and Cute: Congratulations! has suocesefully conpleted puppy pre-school et awwww-cute: Burrito is 100% graduated from Puppy Pre-school and 0% impressed with the hat I made for the occasion AldenRants 35-50 @Squizhii asked me to rant about pickles! Ew. I just. Ohh my gosh ew. I have such. Passionate emotions against pickles. Guys. You.....you probably think I'm being very lively at the moment because it's -not- the middle of the night but nooooope. I'm sure M....my extreme aversion to...pickles disguises just how incredibly exhausted I am right now by fueling me with. The rage...the rage of a thousand...ehh...people......things. WAIT A SECOND, I'M TYPING RIGHT NOW, SO IF I JUST KEEP TYPING IN ALL CAPS, PEOPLE WONT REALIZE THAT I'M ACTUALLY SAYING ALL OF THIS IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW WITH THE UTMOST SENSE OF APATHY AND FATIGUE....OH RIGHT WE'RE ON THE TOPIC OF PICKLES. WHO DECIDED TO JUST. DUMP A CUMCUMBER. IN VINEGAR??? AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHY DID HE KEEP DOING IT?? HE WAS JUST, "No, guys l-listen. It's. It's really good I swear I'm not just saying tha-Judith. Stop laughing at me, Judith. Judith, look-look at me, Judith I'm not crazy." WAS PICKLING NAMED AFTER PICKLES OR WERE PICKLES NAMED AFTER PICKLING!? WHY DOES IT NOT MAKE SENSE EITHER WAY? WHY IS MR. NEZZER SO MUCH BIGGER THAN LARRY THE CUMCUMBER ON VEGGIE TALES?? HOW BIG WAS MR. NEZZER BEFORE HE WAS PICKLEFIED?? WAS HE BORN A PICKLE OR DID HE BECOME ONE? WHAT HORRID CRIMES DID HE COMMIT IN THE VEGGIE WORLD THAT SENTENCED HIM TO A PUNISHMENT AS GRUESOME AS GETTING SHRUNKEN IN VINEGAR? WHY ARE PICKLES RANDOMLY SOLD AT SPORTS EVENTS BUT EXCLUSIVELY IN PLASTIC PACKAGES? I need to go to bed
Anaconda, Crazy, and Cute: Congratulations!
 has suocesefully conpleted
 puppy pre-school
 et
 awwww-cute:
 Burrito is 100% graduated from Puppy
 Pre-school and 0% impressed with
 the hat I made for the occasion
AldenRants 35-50 @Squizhii asked me to rant about pickles! Ew. I just. Ohh my gosh ew. I have such. Passionate emotions against pickles. Guys. You.....you probably think I'm being very lively at the moment because it's -not- the middle of the night but nooooope. I'm sure M....my extreme aversion to...pickles disguises just how incredibly exhausted I am right now by fueling me with. The rage...the rage of a thousand...ehh...people......things. WAIT A SECOND, I'M TYPING RIGHT NOW, SO IF I JUST KEEP TYPING IN ALL CAPS, PEOPLE WONT REALIZE THAT I'M ACTUALLY SAYING ALL OF THIS IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW WITH THE UTMOST SENSE OF APATHY AND FATIGUE....OH RIGHT WE'RE ON THE TOPIC OF PICKLES. WHO DECIDED TO JUST. DUMP A CUMCUMBER. IN VINEGAR??? AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHY DID HE KEEP DOING IT?? HE WAS JUST, "No, guys l-listen. It's. It's really good I swear I'm not just saying tha-Judith. Stop laughing at me, Judith. Judith, look-look at me, Judith I'm not crazy." WAS PICKLING NAMED AFTER PICKLES OR WERE PICKLES NAMED AFTER PICKLING!? WHY DOES IT NOT MAKE SENSE EITHER WAY? WHY IS MR. NEZZER SO MUCH BIGGER THAN LARRY THE CUMCUMBER ON VEGGIE TALES?? HOW BIG WAS MR. NEZZER BEFORE HE WAS PICKLEFIED?? WAS HE BORN A PICKLE OR DID HE BECOME ONE? WHAT HORRID CRIMES DID HE COMMIT IN THE VEGGIE WORLD THAT SENTENCED HIM TO A PUNISHMENT AS GRUESOME AS GETTING SHRUNKEN IN VINEGAR? WHY ARE PICKLES RANDOMLY SOLD AT SPORTS EVENTS BUT EXCLUSIVELY IN PLASTIC PACKAGES? I need to go to bed

AldenRants 35-50 @Squizhii asked me to rant about pickles! Ew. I just. Ohh my gosh ew. I have such. Passionate emotions against pickles. Guy...