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Acted: officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcouture.com hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project! in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community.  it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits.  please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time! But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc. The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged.  But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply. This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it. You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker.  lol that’s my old blog bless :)))))))) @petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT
Acted: officialromaniantranslatiuni:
petruparcatoru:

andiiwrites:

dangerdwight:

vrabia:

officialromaniantranslatiuni:
http://www.bihorcouture.com
hey friends, if you care about cultural appropriation and the damage it causes, please check out this awesome project!
in 2017 dior copied the design of a traditional romanian coat from the county of bihor and sold it for 30,000 euro, giving no credit to the local artisans. in response, romanian fashion magazine beau monde helped the community create their own brand, bihor couture, which sells the original coat, handmade to order, for 500 euro a piece. they also sell other traditional clothing and jewelry for much more accessible prices (5-45 euro). they’ve been hugely successful so far, and currently have enough pre-orders to cover 4.5 years of work, with 100% of the profits returning to the community. 
it’s surprisingly common for big name fashion designers like dior, gaultier, tom ford and altuzarra to copy traditional romanian clothing and sell it for ridiculous prices, with minimal original input, while giving nothing back to the community where these designs originated. it’s completely unfair that a big name designer can just steal so much hard work and misuse it to make huge profits. 
please support bihor couture, if not by ordering one of their products, then by spreading the news around. it’s really awesome to see a small community fight back against cultural appropriation so successfully. i hope they carry on for a long time!


But like, when this is done to cultures of color, non-white, nothing happens. Like, I’m here for the people in Bihor, but it makes me wish more work was done just like this for African countries, Asian countries, Hispanic Countries, etc.

The people of Bihor did this for themselves. With the help of a Romanian magazine, they support themselves. The Romanian community posted this, reblogged this, and you saw and reblogged. 
But this wasn’t done ‘for us’, work was not done ‘for the people of Bihor’. White people didn’t see this other ‘white country’, and sad ‘yes, let us help our fellow white citizens on this Earth while continuing to ignore everyone else’. The people of Romania and Bihor saw this and said ‘we must act’ and acted. Take this US-born concept of ‘cultures of color’ away from multicultural continents like Europe, where this thing does not apply.
This post gained traction on facebook in Romania, from romanian to romanian, and then on tumblr (as you can see, the tumblr that posted it is a Romanian tumblr). The tumblr explaining you this, vrabia, is a romanian tumblr. Nothing is ‘work done for’. We see it, we reblog it, we did it, we’re bringing it to light.  We are doing it. It is work by, not work for. No one gave Romanian and Bihor anything. They/we did it.
You want this ‘done for’ other countries? Angelina Jolie is doing it through UN. Poeple are doing it. But work ’done for Bihor’ (done by) does not invalidate work ‘done for’ other countries and cultures. Let us have this at least, after all the world took Vlad the Impaler and vilified a national hero by making him a bloodsucker. 

lol that’s my old blog bless :))))))))

@petruparcatoru I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO MAKE A POST ASKING WHERE ANDIIWRITES WENT

officialromaniantranslatiuni: petruparcatoru: andiiwrites: dangerdwight: vrabia: officialromaniantranslatiuni: http://www.bihorcoutur...

Acted: stellarsteele: I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find it difficult to relate to different cultural values. Further, as a romance genre fanatic, I wasn’t sure if this show would appeal to me.  Nonetheless, I gave this show a chance. It turned out to be one of the best shows I have ever watched.  In case you love romances as much as I do, there are PLENTY in Babylon Berlin. [The next part of my commentary contains SPOILERS] I was so happy when Gereon and Charlotte finally acted on their undisclosed love for each other in Season 3. The director of the show made a masterful decision to have their love surface* during Reinhold’s birthday party.  Like Reinhold and his lover, Gereon and Charlotte have a forbidden love. The Berlin police discourages any intimacy in their ranks. I think that Gereon and Charlotte make a great couple because they have seen each other in the most vulnerable situations. Charlotte has seen Gereon struggle with drug usage and PTSD. Gereon has seen Charlotte come close to death multiple times.  I would be curious to see if Gereon will find out about Charlotte’s prostitution in later seasons. Would this impact their relationship? This remains to be seen. Ultimately, this was a long awaited scene for me. It proves to me that love can materialize in even the most difficult times. *Pun #1: Recall that Gereon saves Charlotte from drowning by delivering air to her from the surface of the lake in Season 2. [This is purely commentary on Netflix’s Babylon Berlin. The content belongs to Netflix.]
Acted: stellarsteele:
I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find it difficult to relate to different cultural values. Further, as a romance genre fanatic, I wasn’t sure if this show would appeal to me. 
Nonetheless, I gave this show a chance. It turned out to be one of the best shows I have ever watched. 
In case you love romances as much as I do, there are PLENTY in Babylon Berlin.
[The next part of my commentary contains SPOILERS]
I was so happy when Gereon and Charlotte finally acted on their undisclosed love for each other in Season 3. The director of the show made a masterful decision to have their love surface* during Reinhold’s birthday party. 
Like Reinhold and his lover, Gereon and Charlotte have a forbidden love. The Berlin police discourages any intimacy in their ranks.
I think that Gereon and Charlotte make a great couple because they have seen each other in the most vulnerable situations. Charlotte has seen Gereon struggle with drug usage and PTSD. Gereon has seen Charlotte come close to death multiple times. 
I would be curious to see if Gereon will find out about Charlotte’s prostitution in later seasons. Would this impact their relationship? This remains to be seen.
Ultimately, this was a long awaited scene for me. It proves to me that love can materialize in even the most difficult times.
*Pun #1: Recall that Gereon saves Charlotte from drowning by delivering air to her from the surface of the lake in Season 2.
[This is purely commentary on Netflix’s Babylon Berlin. The content belongs to Netflix.]

stellarsteele: I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find...

Acted: stellarsteele: I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find it difficult to relate to different cultural values. Further, as a romance genre fanatic, I wasn’t sure if this show would appeal to me.  Nonetheless, I gave this show a chance. It turned out to be one of the best shows I have ever watched.  In case you love romances as much as I do, there are PLENTY in Babylon Berlin. [The next part of my commentary contains SPOILERS] I was so happy when Gereon and Charlotte finally acted on their undisclosed love for each other in Season 3. The director of the show made a masterful decision to have their love surface* during Reinhold’s birthday party.  Like Reinhold and his lover, Gereon and Charlotte have a forbidden love. The Berlin police discourages any intimacy in their ranks. I think that Gereon and Charlotte make a great couple because they have seen each other in the most vulnerable situations. Charlotte has seen Gereon struggle with drug usage and PTSD. Gereon has seen Charlotte come close to death multiple times.  I would be curious to see if Gereon will find out about Charlotte’s prostitution in later seasons. Would this impact their relationship? This remains to be seen. Ultimately, this was a long awaited scene for me. It proves to me that love can materialize in even the most difficult times. *Pun #1: Recall that Gereon saves Charlotte from drowning by delivering air to her from the surface of the lake in Season 2. [This is purely commentary on Netflix’s Babylon Berlin. The content belongs to Netflix.]
Acted: stellarsteele:
I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find it difficult to relate to different cultural values. Further, as a romance genre fanatic, I wasn’t sure if this show would appeal to me. 
Nonetheless, I gave this show a chance. It turned out to be one of the best shows I have ever watched. 
In case you love romances as much as I do, there are PLENTY in Babylon Berlin.
[The next part of my commentary contains SPOILERS]
I was so happy when Gereon and Charlotte finally acted on their undisclosed love for each other in Season 3. The director of the show made a masterful decision to have their love surface* during Reinhold’s birthday party. 
Like Reinhold and his lover, Gereon and Charlotte have a forbidden love. The Berlin police discourages any intimacy in their ranks.
I think that Gereon and Charlotte make a great couple because they have seen each other in the most vulnerable situations. Charlotte has seen Gereon struggle with drug usage and PTSD. Gereon has seen Charlotte come close to death multiple times. 
I would be curious to see if Gereon will find out about Charlotte’s prostitution in later seasons. Would this impact their relationship? This remains to be seen.
Ultimately, this was a long awaited scene for me. It proves to me that love can materialize in even the most difficult times.
*Pun #1: Recall that Gereon saves Charlotte from drowning by delivering air to her from the surface of the lake in Season 2.
[This is purely commentary on Netflix’s Babylon Berlin. The content belongs to Netflix.]

stellarsteele: I started watching Babylon Berlin when it premiered in 2017. I am not averse to foreign productions, but I sometimes find...

Acted: shed1nja: salty-sadness22: kintatsujo: pretentioussongtitle: disease-danger-darkness-silence: captainroxythefoxy: e-v-roslyn: guu: kuruluv: catwithaknife: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/kzqpd9/heres-an-insane-story-about-a-rogue-music-teacher-cutting-a-kids-hair what the fuck i’m just gonna take this post for a moment so i can rant but like i Hate how entitled adults can feel over a child’s hair! it started when i was young myself, i wanted a mohawk, but my dad didn’t approve of that look on a “girl”, and insisted i’d regret such a bold cut. at 16 i was finally given full autonomy over my own head. but then i have a son and everyone around us is trying to keep his hair short. when we finally moved out just me my partner and him, i told him he doesn’t need to get any haircuts he doesn’t want. so he starts growing it out, it’s still short but coming on mid-length. his teacher makes a point to tell me it’s getting long as if i don’t have eyes. i hear her walking out with him one day talking to him about haircuts, as if to coax him into one. eventually i get child services called on me for ‘forcing a transgender lifestyle’ over what i can only assume is from a combination of me drawing cute ponies on his valentine box and letting him go to school in a ponytail. he kept it short for awhile after but told me he wanted to grow it out again, so i let him of course. he comes home one day after getting a haircut at his grandpa’s and tells me he didn’t Want the haircut. i ask why he got it then and learned he was bribed with a promise of a surprise IF he cut his hair. tl;dr people need to back the hell up off of children and let them have owership of what’s on THEIR body! /rant Same thing about getting a child to curl or straighten their hair. Or do anything with it. Just let kids have control over their bodies. This happened to me when I was little too!! Growing up I had naturally tight Shirley Temple curls. The only problem was that you can’t get a hair brush through it if your life depended on it until it grew out over a few years. but This One Lady from church decided that leaving my hair messy and curly was child abuse and threatened to call social services on my family every damn time she saw me until one day she was the designated kid watcher and ho boy my momma tells me i came out with tears in my eyes and greasy slicked down hair and that’s where she ends the story because i think my mother beat her ass but yeah. Leave kids hair alone. I’m going to be honest, parents who are super-controlling of their children’s hair creep me the fuck out and I’m not entirely certain why except that I get a vague feeling they kind of relegate them to, “annoying talking doll” status. I loved my daughter’s long blond hair. It was thick and wavy and beautiful but when she told me she wanted it cut short ‘like a boy’(she was four)  I took her to the salon and let her whack it off.  The stylist was skeptical, ‘are you sure?” and the thing is, she said this to me, not my daughter. So I asked my girl ‘are you sure you want it cut short?’ She was. The hair went. The stylist acted nervous most of the way through like she was waiting for one of us to burst into tears, but it looked cute! And my daughter loved it! (And it’s been short ever since.) Autonomy over your hair is bodily autonomy and we as a culture need to start holding bodily autonomy as sacred My family, for years, wouldn’t let me dye/cut my hair really short. I could understand the dye, but the shortest they’d let me go is a bob. They even let me dye my hair before letting me go that short. I’m finally in control of my hair and my hair is one of my favorite things about myself. It’s an easy way to express myself. Let kids do what they want with their hair! Let them have fun with their hair before they’re told to grow up and have ‘professional’ hair! My mom had a monopoly over my hair. Wouldn’t let me wear it natural, was obsessed with me having flyaways in the front and wouldn’t let me get out of the car in the mornings until they were flat, permed it when I was 10, wouldn’t let me cut it off for years after even though it was really damaged, vocally disapproved when I finally cut it as short as she’d let me. When I moved out I stopped putting any heat in it and a few years later I cut it all off again. The second cut was my decision alone and it felt like a weight lifted off me, like no one could ever tell me what to do with it again or tell me “I needed it” to be pretty. My stepfather and his stepfather forced a hair cut on me 10 years ago because they said i was too girly for their tastes.I grew my hair out ever since because ill never go fucking bald again like those two fucking neo nazis
Acted: shed1nja:
salty-sadness22:

kintatsujo:

pretentioussongtitle:

disease-danger-darkness-silence:

captainroxythefoxy:

e-v-roslyn:

guu:

kuruluv:

catwithaknife:

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/kzqpd9/heres-an-insane-story-about-a-rogue-music-teacher-cutting-a-kids-hair

what the fuck

i’m just gonna take this post for a moment so i can rant but like
i Hate how entitled adults can feel over a child’s hair!
it started when i was young myself, i wanted a mohawk, but my dad didn’t approve of that look on a “girl”, and insisted i’d regret such a bold cut. at 16 i was finally given full autonomy over my own head.
but then i have a son and everyone around us is trying to keep his hair short. when we finally moved out just me my partner and him, i told him he doesn’t need to get any haircuts he doesn’t want.
so he starts growing it out, it’s still short but coming on mid-length. his teacher makes a point to tell me it’s getting long as if i don’t have eyes. i hear her walking out with him one day talking to him about haircuts, as if to coax him into one. eventually i get child services called on me for ‘forcing a transgender lifestyle’ over what i can only assume is from a combination of me drawing cute ponies on his valentine box and letting him go to school in a ponytail.
he kept it short for awhile after but told me he wanted to grow it out again, so i let him of course. he comes home one day after getting a haircut at his grandpa’s and tells me he didn’t Want the haircut.
i ask why he got it then and learned he was bribed with a promise of a surprise IF he cut his hair.
tl;dr people need to back the hell up off of children and let them have owership of what’s on THEIR body! /rant


Same thing about getting a child to curl or straighten their hair. Or do anything with it. Just let kids have control over their bodies.


This happened to me when I was little too!! Growing up I had naturally tight Shirley Temple curls. The only problem was that you can’t get a hair brush through it if your life depended on it until it grew out over a few years. 
but This One Lady from church decided that leaving my hair messy and curly was child abuse and threatened to call social services on my family every damn time she saw me until one day she was the designated kid watcher and ho boy my momma tells me i came out with tears in my eyes and greasy slicked down hair and that’s where she ends the story because i think my mother beat her ass but yeah.
Leave kids hair alone.

I’m going to be honest, parents who are super-controlling of their children’s hair creep me the fuck out and I’m not entirely certain why except that I get a vague feeling they kind of relegate them to, “annoying talking doll” status.

I loved my daughter’s long blond hair. It was thick and wavy and beautiful but when she told me she wanted it cut short ‘like a boy’(she was four)  I took her to the salon and let her whack it off. 
The stylist was skeptical, ‘are you sure?” and the thing is, she said this to me, not my daughter. So I asked my girl ‘are you sure you want it cut short?’ She was. The hair went. The stylist acted nervous most of the way through like she was waiting for one of us to burst into tears, but it looked cute! And my daughter loved it! (And it’s been short ever since.)

Autonomy over your hair is bodily autonomy and we as a culture need to start holding bodily autonomy as sacred

My family, for years, wouldn’t let me dye/cut my hair really short. I could understand the dye, but the shortest they’d let me go is a bob. They even let me dye my hair before letting me go that short. I’m finally in control of my hair and my hair is one of my favorite things about myself. It’s an easy way to express myself.  
 Let kids do what they want with their hair! Let them have fun with their hair before they’re told to grow up and have ‘professional’ hair! 

My mom had a monopoly over my hair. Wouldn’t let me wear it natural, was obsessed with me having flyaways in the front and wouldn’t let me get out of the car in the mornings until they were flat, permed it when I was 10, wouldn’t let me cut it off for years after even though it was really damaged, vocally disapproved when I finally cut it as short as she’d let me.
When I moved out I stopped putting any heat in it and a few years later I cut it all off again. The second cut was my decision alone and it felt like a weight lifted off me, like no one could ever tell me what to do with it again or tell me “I needed it” to be pretty.



My stepfather and his stepfather forced a hair cut on me 10 years ago because they said i was too girly for their tastes.I grew my hair out ever since because ill never go fucking bald again like those two fucking neo nazis

shed1nja: salty-sadness22: kintatsujo: pretentioussongtitle: disease-danger-darkness-silence: captainroxythefoxy: e-v-roslyn: guu:...

Acted: If People Acted Like Dogs 13
Acted: If People Acted Like Dogs 13

If People Acted Like Dogs 13

Acted: Jennifer Dziura I've responded to this elsewhere around the Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks are often intending to purchase a lowering of the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in a bar and a man offers to buy you a this: cheerfully ask for something nonalcoholic, while indicating get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just trying to strike up conversation: they wanted you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In my own experience, I have twice been offered a drink and instead suggested food -- in both cases, very inexpensive food costing the same or less than a drink drink, try willingness to a and in both -- cases, the man responded angrily. 2 minutes ago Like Reply Jennifer Dziura In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I was starving and suggested the kebab place around the corner. I can't remember who paid, but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy pouted and I never saw him again. The other time, I had done standup in a bar and an older guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually would love some popcorn, which was sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry and acted like I had cheated him somehow. being greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious Scary, scary. Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So: Tips for getting drinks- 1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time. 3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol: Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail: X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state. Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%. Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%. Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21% Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%. Hope this helps someone out! Backing this up from years of bar tending.
Acted: Jennifer Dziura
 I've responded to this elsewhere around the
 Internet. Men who offer to buy women drinks
 are often intending to purchase a lowering of
 the woman's defenses. If you are a woman in
 a bar and a man offers to buy you a
 this: cheerfully ask for something
 nonalcoholic, while indicating
 get to know the guy. At least 50% of men will
 be angry. They weren't offering a gift or just
 trying to strike up conversation: they wanted
 you to be drunk and to let down your guard. In
 my own experience, I have twice been offered
 a drink and instead suggested food -- in both
 cases, very inexpensive food costing the
 same or less than a drink
 drink, try
 willingness to
 a
 and in both
 --
 cases, the man responded angrily.
 2 minutes ago Like Reply
 Jennifer Dziura
 In one case, I met a guy at a concert.I liked
 him. He suggested going to get a drink, but I
 was starving and suggested the kebab place
 around the corner. I can't remember who paid,
 but I had a cheap bowl of soup and the guy
 pouted and I never saw him again. The other
 time, I had done standup in a bar and an older
 guy offered to buy me a drink. I said I actually
 would love some popcorn, which was
 sold **at the bar for $2.** The man got angry
 and acted like I had cheated him somehow.
 being
greek-god-of-hair:


erwin-with-hairpins:

rainfelt:

cardozzza:

notyourexrotic:

(source)

Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious

Scary, scary.


Gonna add on to this:From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:
Tips for getting drinks-
1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser. 
2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.
3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:
X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!


Backing this up from years of bar tending.

greek-god-of-hair: erwin-with-hairpins: rainfelt: cardozzza: notyourexrotic: (source) Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so delibe...