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act: Act of kindness
act: Act of kindness

Act of kindness

act: HE'S NAKED! THAT IAM. CseLDS juliatheanimelover7: the-reviewer: maddreax: rottedd: final act good call Sesshy HSHAHAHAHAHAH 😂 😂 😂 I will ALWAYS reblog this.
act: HE'S
 NAKED!

 THAT IAM.

 CseLDS
juliatheanimelover7:

the-reviewer:
maddreax:


rottedd:

final act


good call Sesshy



HSHAHAHAHAHAH



😂 😂 😂 


I will ALWAYS reblog this.

juliatheanimelover7: the-reviewer: maddreax: rottedd: final act good call Sesshy HSHAHAHAHAHAH 😂 😂 😂 I will ALWAYS reblog...

act: Facts that can save your life. If you vomit and it looks like coffee grounds, you need to get to a hospital. You're bleeding somew The partially digested blood comes up looking like coffee grounds. here and it's reaching your stomach If you ever almost drown to the point of throwing up water or passing out, even if you feel 100% fine, get to a hospital. Your lungs can unwittingly self-fill up with fluid over the next few hours. When having a heart attack, you don't swallow asprin, you chew it. Then swallow. If you're ever somewhere really high (e.g hiking) and you hear crunchy/crinkling noises in the air and/or feel static electricity (like your hair standing up) . get out of there immediately, lightning is on it's way If you're at the beach and the ocean suddenly recedes, get to high ground. ASAP Rohypnol, the date rape drug, has a salty taste to it. Utrafacts.umblr.com mizukiinozomii: spsyched: ladyofthegeneral: bonnieblue85: keeping-up-with-the-jenners: just-the-way-youre-not: ultrafacts: Source: 1 2 3 4 5 6 If you want more facts, follow Ultrafacts THIS IS SO IMPORTANT Reblogging because I care about you guys Important Rohypnol has an INCREDIBLY salty taste to it. It’s disgusting. And it also isn’t a drug that acts immediately! The minute you notice the salty taste, you have about 5-10 minutes to get somewhere safe or call an ambulance, and it CAN be fought if you’re aware of it. It will make you woozy, it will make you so dizzy you can’t stand upright, it will certainly make you unable to walk properly, but if you struggle to remain conscious you can get about 20 extra minutes of consciousness from the drug before it will knock you out completely. If you’re in a public place, and the person who drugged you is trying to take you somewhere private, start. a. fight. Insist as LOUDLY and as VIOLENTLY as you can that you refuse to go anywhere with them. Odds are they’re trying to make as little of a scene as possible as they drag you away, and if you’re putting up a fight and very clearly ‘drunk’, eyes will turn on them and they’ll either need to let you go, or cause a serious scene, which they don’t want. Don’t just act like you’re just protesting being taken home, though. Fight like your life depends on it even if they aren’t assaulting you. Cause. A. Scene. That’s the last thing they want.  Everyone should reblog this! Very useful.
act: Facts that can save your life.
 If you vomit and it looks like coffee grounds,
 you need to get to a hospital. You're bleeding
 somew
 The partially digested blood comes up looking
 like coffee grounds.
 here and it's reaching your stomach
 If you ever almost drown to the point of
 throwing up water or passing out, even if you
 feel 100% fine, get to a hospital. Your lungs
 can unwittingly self-fill up with fluid over the
 next few hours.
 When having a heart attack, you don't
 swallow asprin, you chew it. Then swallow.
 If you're ever somewhere really high (e.g
 hiking) and you hear crunchy/crinkling noises
 in the air and/or feel static electricity (like
 your hair standing up) . get out of there
 immediately, lightning is on it's way
 If you're at the beach and the ocean suddenly
 recedes, get to high ground. ASAP
 Rohypnol, the date rape drug, has a salty
 taste to it.
 Utrafacts.umblr.com
mizukiinozomii:

spsyched:

ladyofthegeneral:

bonnieblue85:

keeping-up-with-the-jenners:

just-the-way-youre-not:

ultrafacts:

Source: 1 2 3 4 5 6 If you want more facts, follow Ultrafacts

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT

Reblogging because I care about you guys

Important

Rohypnol has an INCREDIBLY salty taste to it. It’s disgusting. And it also isn’t a drug that acts immediately! The minute you notice the salty taste, you have about 5-10 minutes to get somewhere safe or call an ambulance, and it CAN be fought if you’re aware of it. It will make you woozy, it will make you so dizzy you can’t stand upright, it will certainly make you unable to walk properly, but if you struggle to remain conscious you can get about 20 extra minutes of consciousness from the drug before it will knock you out completely. If you’re in a public place, and the person who drugged you is trying to take you somewhere private, start. a. fight. Insist as LOUDLY and as VIOLENTLY as you can that you refuse to go anywhere with them. Odds are they’re 

 trying to make as little of a scene as possible as they drag you away, and if you’re putting up a fight and very clearly ‘drunk’, eyes will turn on them and they’ll either need to let you go, or cause a serious scene, which they don’t want. Don’t just act like you’re just protesting being taken home, though. Fight like your life depends on it even if they aren’t assaulting you. Cause. A. Scene. That’s the last thing they want. 

Everyone should reblog this!


Very useful.

mizukiinozomii: spsyched: ladyofthegeneral: bonnieblue85: keeping-up-with-the-jenners: just-the-way-youre-not: ultrafacts: Source:...

act: y @TheStrangeRoots How programming languages got their names Bash Clojure The creator wanted to include the letter 'c' (C#), 'I (Lisp) and 'j' (Java) and liked that it was a pun on 'closure! The word 'closure, the act of closing, comes from the Latin 'clausūra' stemming from' clauděre' which means 'to shut or close! Bash is an acronym for Bourne-again Shell, a pun on the Bourne Shell - named after creator Stephen Bourne - being "born again". 'Bash' is also a verb meaning 'to strike with a heavy blow', possibly from the Danish 'baske' meaning 'to beat, strike! Quite simply C got its name because it was preceded by a programming language called B.C spawned its own children including C++ and C#.It is the third letter in the English alphabet and was originally identical to the Greek letter 'Gamma', Java Go Elixir The name Java was the result of a highly- caffeinated brainstorming session. Java, or 'Jawa' in Indonesian, is the name of a large island in Indonesia that produces strong, dark and sweet coffee. It has been a slang term for coffee in the United States since the 1800s. One of the Google developers said the name Go, sometime referred to as Golang, was chosen because it was 'short and easy to type' The word 'go, meaning 'to travel or go somewhere' stems from the Old High German 'gan' (to go). The word 'elixir', meaning a potion or essence that prolongs life or preserves something, stems from the Arabic 'al-ikst' via the late Greek 'xerion', a powder for drying wounds. Appeared in Middle English from the 14th century. Java JavaScript Kotlin Perl Originally named Mocha, a type of fine quality coffee, it was later renamed JavaScript, combining Java, US slang for coffee, + 'Script, 'something that is written' from the Latin 'scriptum, 'a set of written words or writing. Inspired by Java, it was named after Kotlin Island in Russia. Originally called Kettusaari by the Finns ('fox island') and Ketlingen by the Swedes, (maybe stemming from 'kettel' meaning 'cauldron'). After Russia won control of the island in 1703 it was Initially named Pearl, the alternative spelling was adopted as the name was already taken. It comes from the Middle French 'perle 'meaning 'bead' or 'something valuable' and the Latin 'perna' meaning 'leg, also a mollusc shaped like a leg of mutton. JS renamed 'Kotling' then 'Kotlin. PHP Python Ris named partly after the first names of the first two R authors (Ross Ihaka and Robert Gentleman) and partly as a play on the name of S, itss parent langauge. It is the 18th letter in the alphabet and derives from the Greek letter 'Rho' php Originally known as Personal Home Page Construction Kit, this was later shortened to just PHP (an acronym for Personal Home Page). It is now accepted as the initials for PHP: Hypertext Preprocessor. Creator Guido van Rossum named Python after TV comedy Monty Python's Flying Circus. The word 'python' comes from the ancient Greek 'Puthón, the name of a huge serpent killed by the god Apollo. Later adopted as a generic term for non- poisonous snakes that constrict their prey. Ruby Scala Rust Influenced by Perl, the developer chose a colleague's birthstone which followed it in the monthly sequence (June is Pearl, Ruby is July). Ruby comes from the Old French 'rubi', a 'reddish precious stone', and the Latin 'rubeus, 'red'. Rust's name comes from a fungus that is robust, distributed, and parallel. It is also a substring of robust. Rust, also the reddish coating formed on oxidized metal, stems from the German 'rost' and possibly the Indo-European base of 'red. Scala is a combination of the first letters of 'scalable' and 'language! It is also the Italian word for 'stairway', as it helps users to ascend to a better language. The logo is also an abstraction of a staircase or steps. SQL Swift TypeScript SQL Originating from the shortcomings of JavaScript, hence the similarility of the name. Its name combines 'Type', meaning a kind or class (from the Greek 'tuptein' 'to strike'), with 'Script, 'something that is written' from the Latin 'scriptum'. First called "Structured English Query Language" (SEQUEL), pronounced "sequel", it was a pun that it was the sequel to QUEL. It was later shortened to SQL. The word 'sequel' stems from the Latin 'sequela' from 'sequr' meaning 'to follow. The word 'swift' means 'moving with great speed or velocity' and can be traced back to the prehistoric 'swipt' meaning to 'move in a sweeping manner'. The swallow-like bird became known as a swift from the 17th century and is used as the language's logo. TS how programming languages got their names
act: y @TheStrangeRoots
 How programming languages got their names
 Bash
 Clojure
 The creator wanted to include the letter 'c' (C#), 'I
 (Lisp) and 'j' (Java) and liked that it was a pun on
 'closure! The word 'closure, the act of closing, comes
 from the Latin 'clausūra' stemming from' clauděre'
 which means 'to shut or close!
 Bash is an acronym for Bourne-again Shell, a pun
 on the Bourne Shell - named after creator Stephen
 Bourne - being "born again". 'Bash' is also a verb
 meaning 'to strike with a heavy blow', possibly from
 the Danish 'baske' meaning 'to beat, strike!
 Quite simply C got its name because it was
 preceded by a programming language called B.C
 spawned its own children including C++ and C#.It
 is the third letter in the English alphabet and was
 originally identical to the Greek letter 'Gamma',
 Java
 Go
 Elixir
 The name Java was the result of a highly-
 caffeinated brainstorming session. Java, or 'Jawa'
 in Indonesian, is the name of a large island in
 Indonesia that produces strong, dark and sweet
 coffee. It has been a slang term for coffee in the
 United States since the 1800s.
 One of the Google developers said the name Go,
 sometime referred to as Golang, was chosen
 because it was 'short and easy to type'
 The word 'go, meaning 'to travel or go somewhere'
 stems from the Old High German 'gan' (to go).
 The word 'elixir', meaning a potion or essence that
 prolongs life or preserves something, stems from
 the Arabic 'al-ikst' via the late Greek 'xerion', a
 powder for drying wounds. Appeared in Middle
 English from the 14th century.
 Java
 JavaScript
 Kotlin
 Perl
 Originally named Mocha, a type of fine quality
 coffee, it was later renamed JavaScript, combining
 Java, US slang for coffee, + 'Script, 'something that
 is written' from the Latin 'scriptum, 'a set of
 written words or writing.
 Inspired by Java, it was named after Kotlin Island
 in Russia. Originally called Kettusaari by the Finns
 ('fox island') and Ketlingen by the Swedes, (maybe
 stemming from 'kettel' meaning 'cauldron'). After
 Russia won control of the island in 1703 it was
 Initially named Pearl, the alternative spelling was
 adopted as the name was already taken. It comes
 from the Middle French 'perle 'meaning 'bead' or
 'something valuable' and the Latin 'perna' meaning
 'leg, also a mollusc shaped like a leg of mutton.
 JS
 renamed 'Kotling' then 'Kotlin.
 PHP
 Python
 Ris named partly after the first names of the first
 two R authors (Ross Ihaka and Robert Gentleman)
 and partly as a play on the name of S, itss parent
 langauge. It is the 18th letter in the alphabet and
 derives from the Greek letter 'Rho'
 php
 Originally known as Personal Home Page
 Construction Kit, this was later shortened to just
 PHP (an acronym for Personal Home Page). It is
 now accepted as the initials for PHP: Hypertext
 Preprocessor.
 Creator Guido van Rossum named Python after TV
 comedy Monty Python's Flying Circus. The word
 'python' comes from the ancient Greek 'Puthón,
 the name of a huge serpent killed by the god
 Apollo. Later adopted as a generic term for non-
 poisonous snakes that constrict their prey.
 Ruby
 Scala
 Rust
 Influenced by Perl, the developer chose a
 colleague's birthstone which followed it in the
 monthly sequence (June is Pearl, Ruby is July).
 Ruby comes from the Old French 'rubi', a 'reddish
 precious stone', and the Latin 'rubeus, 'red'.
 Rust's name comes from a fungus that is robust,
 distributed, and parallel. It is also a substring of
 robust. Rust, also the reddish coating formed on
 oxidized metal, stems from the German 'rost' and
 possibly the Indo-European base of 'red.
 Scala is a combination of the first letters of
 'scalable' and 'language! It is also the Italian word
 for 'stairway', as it helps users to ascend to a
 better language. The logo is also an abstraction of
 a staircase or steps.
 SQL
 Swift
 TypeScript
 SQL
 Originating from the shortcomings of JavaScript,
 hence the similarility of the name. Its name
 combines 'Type', meaning a kind or class (from the
 Greek 'tuptein' 'to strike'), with 'Script, 'something
 that is written' from the Latin 'scriptum'.
 First called "Structured English Query Language"
 (SEQUEL), pronounced "sequel", it was a pun that it
 was the sequel to QUEL. It was later shortened to
 SQL. The word 'sequel' stems from the Latin
 'sequela' from 'sequr' meaning 'to follow.
 The word 'swift' means 'moving with great speed or
 velocity' and can be traced back to the prehistoric
 'swipt' meaning to 'move in a sweeping manner'. The
 swallow-like bird became known as a swift from the
 17th century and is used as the language's logo.
 TS
how programming languages got their names

how programming languages got their names

act: HE'S NAKED! THAT IAM. CseLDS the-reviewer: maddreax: rottedd: final act good call Sesshy HSHAHAHAHAHAH
act: HE'S
 NAKED!

 THAT IAM.

 CseLDS
the-reviewer:
maddreax:


rottedd:

final act


good call Sesshy



HSHAHAHAHAHAH

the-reviewer: maddreax: rottedd: final act good call Sesshy HSHAHAHAHAHAH

act: jesssssSS my2k reminder: this woman leaked proof that Russians hacked into voting machine software, and they put her in jail The Vancouver Sun@VancouverSun Why do millennials keep leaking government secrets? ebx.sh/2ragGeK simonalkenmayer: memor-somnis: weavemama: fuggles: weavemama: she should have been rewarded. Y'all got sources? yeah so more information about this woman who leaked important information pertaining russia’s involvement in the election:  Her name is “Reality Leigh Winner” and she was a NSA Contractor. She passed a top secret NSA document to a news source (an article from The Intercept) that contains information about a Russian cyber-attack with one voting machine DAYS before the 2016 presidential election. This is considered the most detailed piece of proof regarding Russia’s interference with the elections to date.  Here’s how the NSA document described how the Russians did the hacking:  “As described by the classified NSA report, the Russian plan was simple: pose as an e-voting vendor and trick local government employees into opening Microsoft Word documents invisibly tainted with potent malware that could give hackers full control over the infected computers. But in order to dupe the local officials, the hackers needed access to an election software vendor’s internal systems to put together a convincing disguise. So on August 24, 2016, the Russian hackers sent spoofed emails purporting to be from Google to employees of an unnamed U.S. election software company, according to the NSA report. Although the document does not directly identify the company in question, it contains references to a product made by VR Systems, a Florida-based vendor of electronic voting services and equipment whose products are used in eight states. The spear-phishing email contained a link directing the employees to a malicious, faux-Google website that would request their login credentials and then hand them over to the hackers. The NSA identified seven “potential victims” at the company. While malicious emails targeting three of the potential victims were rejected by an email server, at least one of the employee accounts was likely compromised, the agency concluded. The NSA notes in its report that it is “unknown whether the aforementioned spear-phishing deployment successfully compromised all the intended victims, and what potential data from the victim could have been exfiltrated.” So instead of having Trump and his entire party removed, they gon throw home girl in jail and try to act like none of this happened. Her name, Reality Winner, is ironic in this context.
act: jesssssSS
 my2k
 reminder: this woman leaked proof that
 Russians hacked into voting machine
 software, and they put her in jail
 The Vancouver Sun@VancouverSun
 Why do millennials keep leaking government
 secrets? ebx.sh/2ragGeK
simonalkenmayer:

memor-somnis:

weavemama:


fuggles:

weavemama:

she should have been rewarded.

Y'all got sources?

yeah so more information about this woman who leaked important information pertaining russia’s involvement in the election: 
Her name is “Reality Leigh Winner” and she was a NSA Contractor. She passed a top secret NSA document to a news source (an article from The Intercept) that contains information about a Russian cyber-attack with one voting machine DAYS before the 2016 presidential election. This is considered the most detailed piece of proof regarding Russia’s interference with the elections to date. 
Here’s how the NSA document described how the Russians did the hacking: 
“As described by the classified NSA report, the Russian plan was simple: pose as an e-voting vendor and trick local government employees into opening Microsoft Word documents invisibly tainted with potent malware that could give hackers full control over the infected computers.
But in order to dupe the local officials, the hackers needed access to an election software vendor’s internal systems to put together a convincing disguise. So on August 24, 2016, the Russian hackers sent spoofed emails purporting to be from Google to employees of an unnamed U.S. election software company, according to the NSA report. Although the document does not directly identify the company in question, it contains references to a product made by VR Systems, a Florida-based vendor of electronic voting services and equipment whose products are used in eight states.
The spear-phishing email contained a link directing the employees to a malicious, faux-Google website that would request their login credentials and then hand them over to the hackers. The NSA identified seven “potential victims” at the company. While malicious emails targeting three of the potential victims were rejected by an email server, at least one of the employee accounts was likely compromised, the agency concluded. The NSA notes in its report that it is “unknown whether the aforementioned spear-phishing deployment successfully compromised all the intended victims, and what potential data from the victim could have been exfiltrated.”


So instead of having Trump and his entire party removed, they gon throw home girl in jail and try to act like none of this happened.


Her name, Reality Winner, is ironic in this context.

simonalkenmayer: memor-somnis: weavemama: fuggles: weavemama: she should have been rewarded. Y'all got sources? yeah so more info...

act: Joey Saladino O @JoeySalads · 25 Sep If Trump gets impeached, I will donate my Left testicle to medical research. You can quote me on this. t7 748 957 3,583 Trevisaurus Rex @Trevisaur · 23s Pay up, you piss-drinking nazi. littlebabypubert: threadzless: aphony-cree: bscully: swevicki: dude-its-liz: libertybill: Ok but damn you gotto give it to him, dude actually did it. Bullshit. He didn’t. He’s pulling a PR stunt right now. From a quick googling, national testicle association doesn’t exist anywhere. Most hits track back to news articles to this subject matter, but there is NO actual association with that exact name (Did all these fucks who created their clickbait articles around the web even bother to check…?) “Sincerely, Dick N bawls”? Lol seriously tumblr are you this gullible everyone can take a picture of them wearing a oxygen tube, especially if it doesn’t seem to connect to anywhere (= normally a oxygen device or similar  should be next to his bed). They can be detached to the main tube, leaving only the piece that wraps around your your ears/head, that’s exactly how that photo looks like. I should have taken a pic like that last time I was in the hospital just to bullshit people on social media lmao Also this: Where’s that Testicle Association you’re speaking of? That NTA logo on the letterhead is from the Nutritional Therapy Association (x) If you expected a nazi to act with integrity you haven’t been paying attention This website is sooo fucking unbelievably stupid imagine needing an entire dissertation to understand that this neo-nazi did not actually donate his left testicle to the “National Testicle Association” and produce a document signed by a real man named Dick N Bawls
act: Joey Saladino O @JoeySalads · 25 Sep
 If Trump gets impeached, I will donate my Left
 testicle to medical research.
 You can quote me on this.
 t7 748
 957
 3,583
 Trevisaurus Rex @Trevisaur · 23s
 Pay up, you piss-drinking nazi.
littlebabypubert:

threadzless:

aphony-cree:

bscully:

swevicki:

dude-its-liz:


libertybill:







Ok but damn you gotto give it to him, dude actually did it.


Bullshit. He didn’t. He’s pulling a PR stunt right now.


From a quick googling, national testicle association doesn’t exist anywhere. Most hits track back to news articles to this subject matter, but there is NO actual association with that exact name (Did all these fucks who created their clickbait articles around the web even bother to check…?)
“Sincerely, Dick N bawls”? Lol seriously tumblr are you this gullible
everyone can take a picture of them wearing a oxygen tube, especially if it doesn’t seem to connect to anywhere (= normally a oxygen device or similar  should be next to his bed). They can be detached to the main tube, leaving only the piece that wraps around your your ears/head, that’s exactly how that photo looks like. I should have taken a pic like that last time I was in the hospital just to bullshit people on social media lmao

Also this:
Where’s that Testicle Association you’re speaking of?

That NTA logo on the letterhead is from the Nutritional Therapy Association (x)



If you expected a nazi to act with integrity you haven’t been paying attention 

This website is sooo fucking unbelievably stupid imagine needing an entire dissertation to understand that this neo-nazi did not actually donate his left testicle to the “National Testicle Association” and produce a document signed by a real man named Dick N Bawls

littlebabypubert: threadzless: aphony-cree: bscully: swevicki: dude-its-liz: libertybill: Ok but damn you gotto give it to...

act: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
act: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

act: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
act: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

act: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
act: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

act: WHY I MUST SEX WITH YOU HAVE ORIGHT NOW ALL THE TIME TONIGHT VERY VERY SOON m freshly shaved. Oljust got a Brazlian. O To keep warm. To stop fighting. To bond emotionally To feel closer to you. Because quickies are cool O My therapist suggested it To act out a fantasy Dljust lost ten pounds Because you feed me. Because I'm tke that To break in the new mattress Djust changed the sheets. Tomorrow's taundry day O To say goodbye. To say I'm sory. To say thank you OI ran out of batteries You complete me. I want to get back together 'm ovulating. OMy endorphins are firing. To forget about my ex. To help you forget your ex. Afternoon delight OI'm leaving the country. O got draftod #relationshipgoals Simon says Practice makes perfect. To carry on the family name Because wo both love cheese. Because 1 started doing yoga. I'm an artist. I'ma rocker. You care about grammar OI have good genes. You look good in jeans It's written in the stars. It's on my to-do list. O I'm tired of swiping left. m tired of swiping tight Oi won't find anything better. Ot'S winwin Oi have a headache. Ive heard it's fun. I'm tipsy aI'm bored OYou're hot You're smart You've got big hands. It would upset my mother. OSomeone dared me. DIcrave attention. DI had a good day. DI had a bad day, Im horny. 3 You smell nice Sin is in, Celibacy is out. O My roommate is out Dl just learned a new technique. DIneed to bum some calories. O You're funny. I'm stupid It'd be my pleasure. It'd be your pleasure. Because I love you It's raining. It's Wednesday Procrastination. DI haven't showered yet. DIjust showered. O I'm naked To celebrate. To boost my self-esteem. To boost my serotonin levels. Because you touch me like that). You're easy. I'm a professional. I've got a motorcycle. I'm about to be famous. You're famous. OI need to release tension. OI need the validation. DI need the dopamine rush To commune with God. To live ife to the fullest. Dl lovehate you. I love/hate myself. OI hate everybody but you. It's been a while. It'l make me popular. Iwant to make a baby. My regular lover is out of town. It's my New Year's resolution, To change the subject. To even the score. As a personal favor. Revirginization isn't working out O1ke screaming "Oh yeah, baby!" You give me butterfies OHabit Because you're the real deal Because I lack self-control. Because you carried me home. I'm on the rebound Bow-chicka-wowwow. a Sol can stop crying. Because I lost my orgasm. Because I'm uniquely flexible. It's the end of the world. The power is out. aYou have tons of tollowers. OI'm finally singlo. We both lean left. We both lean right. To make me feel young To escape reality. O heard you were good. OI'm that good. Because I love wearing condoms. You're fnally singlo. To dust off the cobwebs To improve my rhythm. You got dumped. Oigot dumped. D ike your shoes. Oi can't sleep. Oi got a new job. To make bfe better You alreacy know why I'm avoiding antidepressants. For spirituai transcendence. 'Cause you're my babes, babe OI need some juicy gossip. I'm trying out for a pom. To expand my horizons. To take us to the next level. Im out of chocolate. We're stuck with each other Because I'm online. The happy pills aren't working. I'm tired of oral sex. I'm tired of being a virgin. Ol feel sorry for you. I'm addicted. You drive a nice car To feel whole. OI don't live here. You don't live here It's easier than facing our issues. You clean up real nice. You're a good dancer You're rich O I'm easy. OYour skin is soft O Your hair is soft. Your package looks promising. D There's nothing on TV OThe kids are asleep. OMy parents are out. O My hand's getting tired. OThird base is getting old. The birds and the bees do it. DI have a medical condition To manage stress. Because 1 did the dishes My vocal cords need exercise. The sock is on the doorknob. It's my birthday. It's your birthday. It's someone's birthday. OYou're sexy AF Because our therapist said so DI have excellent stamina Ojust finished the Kama Sutra. You look like you need it. You're a good human. Ive been Kegeling. DI have ten minutes to kill OWe're here and we're queer To break in my new car. O My blowup doll sprung a leak. I'm polyamorous. aI had a dream about you. OMeditation makes me homy. Dljust popped a Viagra. Our bodies fit. To scratch my itch. To increase my resistance. Oike your you-know-what. You've got a big...brain. OWe're human. Why not? WITH SUGAR ON TOP PRETTY PLEASE PLEASE IWON'T BEG YEAR DAY MONTH SIGNATURE "WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD? awesomage: Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist
act: WHY I MUST
 SEX WITH YOU
 HAVE
 ORIGHT NOW
 ALL THE TIME
 TONIGHT VERY VERY SOON
 m freshly shaved.
 Oljust got a Brazlian.
 O To keep warm.
 To stop fighting.
 To bond emotionally
 To feel closer to you.
 Because quickies are cool
 O My therapist suggested it
 To act out a fantasy
 Dljust lost ten pounds
 Because you feed me.
 Because I'm tke that
 To break in the new mattress
 Djust changed the sheets.
 Tomorrow's taundry day
 O To say goodbye.
 To say I'm sory.
 To say thank you
 OI ran out of batteries
 You complete me.
 I want to get back together
 'm ovulating.
 OMy endorphins are firing.
 To forget about my ex.
 To help you forget your ex.
 Afternoon delight
 OI'm leaving the country.
 O got draftod
 #relationshipgoals
 Simon says
 Practice makes perfect.
 To carry on the family name
 Because wo both love cheese.
 Because 1 started doing yoga.
 I'm an artist.
 I'ma rocker.
 You care about grammar
 OI have good genes.
 You look good in jeans
 It's written in the stars.
 It's on my to-do list.
 O I'm tired of swiping left.
 m tired of swiping tight
 Oi won't find anything better.
 Ot'S winwin
 Oi have a headache.
 Ive heard it's fun.
 I'm tipsy
 aI'm bored
 OYou're hot
 You're smart
 You've got big hands.
 It would upset my mother.
 OSomeone dared me.
 DIcrave attention.
 DI had a good day.
 DI had a bad day,
 Im horny.
 3 You smell nice
 Sin is in,
 Celibacy is out.
 O My roommate is out
 Dl just learned a new technique.
 DIneed to bum some calories.
 O You're funny.
 I'm stupid
 It'd be my pleasure.
 It'd be your pleasure.
 Because I love you
 It's raining.
 It's Wednesday
 Procrastination.
 DI haven't showered yet.
 DIjust showered.
 O I'm naked
 To celebrate.
 To boost my self-esteem.
 To boost my serotonin levels.
 Because you touch me like that). You're easy.
 I'm a professional.
 I've got a motorcycle.
 I'm about to be famous.
 You're famous.
 OI need to release tension.
 OI need the validation.
 DI need the dopamine rush
 To commune with God.
 To live ife to the fullest.
 Dl lovehate you.
 I love/hate myself.
 OI hate everybody but you.
 It's been a while.
 It'l make me popular.
 Iwant to make a baby.
 My regular lover is out of town.
 It's my New Year's resolution,
 To change the subject.
 To even the score.
 As a personal favor.
 Revirginization isn't working out
 O1ke screaming "Oh yeah, baby!"
 You give me butterfies
 OHabit
 Because you're the real deal
 Because I lack self-control.
 Because you carried me home.
 I'm on the rebound
 Bow-chicka-wowwow.
 a Sol can stop crying.
 Because I lost my orgasm.
 Because I'm uniquely flexible.
 It's the end of the world.
 The power is out.
 aYou have tons of tollowers.
 OI'm finally singlo.
 We both lean left.
 We both lean right.
 To make me feel young
 To escape reality.
 O heard you were good.
 OI'm that good.
 Because I love wearing condoms. You're fnally singlo.
 To dust off the cobwebs
 To improve my rhythm.
 You got dumped.
 Oigot dumped.
 D ike your shoes.
 Oi can't sleep.
 Oi got a new job.
 To make bfe better
 You alreacy know why
 I'm avoiding antidepressants.
 For spirituai transcendence.
 'Cause you're my babes, babe
 OI need some juicy gossip.
 I'm trying out for a pom.
 To expand my horizons.
 To take us to the next level.
 Im out of chocolate.
 We're stuck with each other
 Because I'm online.
 The happy pills aren't working.
 I'm tired of oral sex.
 I'm tired of being a virgin.
 Ol feel sorry for you.
 I'm addicted.
 You drive a nice car
 To feel whole.
 OI don't live here.
 You don't live here
 It's easier than facing our issues.
 You clean up real nice.
 You're a good dancer
 You're rich
 O I'm easy.
 OYour skin is soft
 O Your hair is soft.
 Your package looks promising.
 D There's nothing on TV
 OThe kids are asleep.
 OMy parents are out.
 O My hand's getting tired.
 OThird base is getting old.
 The birds and the bees do it.
 DI have a medical condition
 To manage stress.
 Because 1 did the dishes
 My vocal cords need exercise.
 The sock is on the doorknob.
 It's my birthday.
 It's your birthday.
 It's someone's birthday.
 OYou're sexy AF
 Because our therapist said so
 DI have excellent stamina
 Ojust finished the Kama Sutra.
 You look like you need it.
 You're a good human.
 Ive been Kegeling.
 DI have ten minutes to kill
 OWe're here and we're queer
 To break in my new car.
 O My blowup doll sprung a leak.
 I'm polyamorous.
 aI had a dream about you.
 OMeditation makes me homy.
 Dljust popped a Viagra.
 Our bodies fit.
 To scratch my itch.
 To increase my resistance.
 Oike your you-know-what.
 You've got a big...brain.
 OWe're human.
 Why not?
 WITH SUGAR ON TOP
 PRETTY PLEASE
 PLEASE
 IWON'T BEG
 YEAR
 DAY
 MONTH
 SIGNATURE
 "WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?
awesomage:

Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist

awesomage: Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist

act: WHY I MUST SEX WITH YOU HAVE ORIGHT NOW ALL THE TIME TONIGHT VERY VERY SOON m freshly shaved. Oljust got a Brazlian. O To keep warm. To stop fighting. To bond emotionally To feel closer to you. Because quickies are cool O My therapist suggested it To act out a fantasy Dljust lost ten pounds Because you feed me. Because I'm tke that To break in the new mattress Djust changed the sheets. Tomorrow's taundry day O To say goodbye. To say I'm sory. To say thank you OI ran out of batteries You complete me. I want to get back together 'm ovulating. OMy endorphins are firing. To forget about my ex. To help you forget your ex. Afternoon delight OI'm leaving the country. O got draftod #relationshipgoals Simon says Practice makes perfect. To carry on the family name Because wo both love cheese. Because 1 started doing yoga. I'm an artist. I'ma rocker. You care about grammar OI have good genes. You look good in jeans It's written in the stars. It's on my to-do list. O I'm tired of swiping left. m tired of swiping tight Oi won't find anything better. Ot'S winwin Oi have a headache. Ive heard it's fun. I'm tipsy aI'm bored OYou're hot You're smart You've got big hands. It would upset my mother. OSomeone dared me. DIcrave attention. DI had a good day. DI had a bad day, Im horny. 3 You smell nice Sin is in, Celibacy is out. O My roommate is out Dl just learned a new technique. DIneed to bum some calories. O You're funny. I'm stupid It'd be my pleasure. It'd be your pleasure. Because I love you It's raining. It's Wednesday Procrastination. DI haven't showered yet. DIjust showered. O I'm naked To celebrate. To boost my self-esteem. To boost my serotonin levels. Because you touch me like that). You're easy. I'm a professional. I've got a motorcycle. I'm about to be famous. You're famous. OI need to release tension. OI need the validation. DI need the dopamine rush To commune with God. To live ife to the fullest. Dl lovehate you. I love/hate myself. OI hate everybody but you. It's been a while. It'l make me popular. Iwant to make a baby. My regular lover is out of town. It's my New Year's resolution, To change the subject. To even the score. As a personal favor. Revirginization isn't working out O1ke screaming "Oh yeah, baby!" You give me butterfies OHabit Because you're the real deal Because I lack self-control. Because you carried me home. I'm on the rebound Bow-chicka-wowwow. a Sol can stop crying. Because I lost my orgasm. Because I'm uniquely flexible. It's the end of the world. The power is out. aYou have tons of tollowers. OI'm finally singlo. We both lean left. We both lean right. To make me feel young To escape reality. O heard you were good. OI'm that good. Because I love wearing condoms. You're fnally singlo. To dust off the cobwebs To improve my rhythm. You got dumped. Oigot dumped. D ike your shoes. Oi can't sleep. Oi got a new job. To make bfe better You alreacy know why I'm avoiding antidepressants. For spirituai transcendence. 'Cause you're my babes, babe OI need some juicy gossip. I'm trying out for a pom. To expand my horizons. To take us to the next level. Im out of chocolate. We're stuck with each other Because I'm online. The happy pills aren't working. I'm tired of oral sex. I'm tired of being a virgin. Ol feel sorry for you. I'm addicted. You drive a nice car To feel whole. OI don't live here. You don't live here It's easier than facing our issues. You clean up real nice. You're a good dancer You're rich O I'm easy. OYour skin is soft O Your hair is soft. Your package looks promising. D There's nothing on TV OThe kids are asleep. OMy parents are out. O My hand's getting tired. OThird base is getting old. The birds and the bees do it. DI have a medical condition To manage stress. Because 1 did the dishes My vocal cords need exercise. The sock is on the doorknob. It's my birthday. It's your birthday. It's someone's birthday. OYou're sexy AF Because our therapist said so DI have excellent stamina Ojust finished the Kama Sutra. You look like you need it. You're a good human. Ive been Kegeling. DI have ten minutes to kill OWe're here and we're queer To break in my new car. O My blowup doll sprung a leak. I'm polyamorous. aI had a dream about you. OMeditation makes me homy. Dljust popped a Viagra. Our bodies fit. To scratch my itch. To increase my resistance. Oike your you-know-what. You've got a big...brain. OWe're human. Why not? WITH SUGAR ON TOP PRETTY PLEASE PLEASE IWON'T BEG YEAR DAY MONTH SIGNATURE "WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD? awesomage: Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist
act: WHY I MUST
 SEX WITH YOU
 HAVE
 ORIGHT NOW
 ALL THE TIME
 TONIGHT VERY VERY SOON
 m freshly shaved.
 Oljust got a Brazlian.
 O To keep warm.
 To stop fighting.
 To bond emotionally
 To feel closer to you.
 Because quickies are cool
 O My therapist suggested it
 To act out a fantasy
 Dljust lost ten pounds
 Because you feed me.
 Because I'm tke that
 To break in the new mattress
 Djust changed the sheets.
 Tomorrow's taundry day
 O To say goodbye.
 To say I'm sory.
 To say thank you
 OI ran out of batteries
 You complete me.
 I want to get back together
 'm ovulating.
 OMy endorphins are firing.
 To forget about my ex.
 To help you forget your ex.
 Afternoon delight
 OI'm leaving the country.
 O got draftod
 #relationshipgoals
 Simon says
 Practice makes perfect.
 To carry on the family name
 Because wo both love cheese.
 Because 1 started doing yoga.
 I'm an artist.
 I'ma rocker.
 You care about grammar
 OI have good genes.
 You look good in jeans
 It's written in the stars.
 It's on my to-do list.
 O I'm tired of swiping left.
 m tired of swiping tight
 Oi won't find anything better.
 Ot'S winwin
 Oi have a headache.
 Ive heard it's fun.
 I'm tipsy
 aI'm bored
 OYou're hot
 You're smart
 You've got big hands.
 It would upset my mother.
 OSomeone dared me.
 DIcrave attention.
 DI had a good day.
 DI had a bad day,
 Im horny.
 3 You smell nice
 Sin is in,
 Celibacy is out.
 O My roommate is out
 Dl just learned a new technique.
 DIneed to bum some calories.
 O You're funny.
 I'm stupid
 It'd be my pleasure.
 It'd be your pleasure.
 Because I love you
 It's raining.
 It's Wednesday
 Procrastination.
 DI haven't showered yet.
 DIjust showered.
 O I'm naked
 To celebrate.
 To boost my self-esteem.
 To boost my serotonin levels.
 Because you touch me like that). You're easy.
 I'm a professional.
 I've got a motorcycle.
 I'm about to be famous.
 You're famous.
 OI need to release tension.
 OI need the validation.
 DI need the dopamine rush
 To commune with God.
 To live ife to the fullest.
 Dl lovehate you.
 I love/hate myself.
 OI hate everybody but you.
 It's been a while.
 It'l make me popular.
 Iwant to make a baby.
 My regular lover is out of town.
 It's my New Year's resolution,
 To change the subject.
 To even the score.
 As a personal favor.
 Revirginization isn't working out
 O1ke screaming "Oh yeah, baby!"
 You give me butterfies
 OHabit
 Because you're the real deal
 Because I lack self-control.
 Because you carried me home.
 I'm on the rebound
 Bow-chicka-wowwow.
 a Sol can stop crying.
 Because I lost my orgasm.
 Because I'm uniquely flexible.
 It's the end of the world.
 The power is out.
 aYou have tons of tollowers.
 OI'm finally singlo.
 We both lean left.
 We both lean right.
 To make me feel young
 To escape reality.
 O heard you were good.
 OI'm that good.
 Because I love wearing condoms. You're fnally singlo.
 To dust off the cobwebs
 To improve my rhythm.
 You got dumped.
 Oigot dumped.
 D ike your shoes.
 Oi can't sleep.
 Oi got a new job.
 To make bfe better
 You alreacy know why
 I'm avoiding antidepressants.
 For spirituai transcendence.
 'Cause you're my babes, babe
 OI need some juicy gossip.
 I'm trying out for a pom.
 To expand my horizons.
 To take us to the next level.
 Im out of chocolate.
 We're stuck with each other
 Because I'm online.
 The happy pills aren't working.
 I'm tired of oral sex.
 I'm tired of being a virgin.
 Ol feel sorry for you.
 I'm addicted.
 You drive a nice car
 To feel whole.
 OI don't live here.
 You don't live here
 It's easier than facing our issues.
 You clean up real nice.
 You're a good dancer
 You're rich
 O I'm easy.
 OYour skin is soft
 O Your hair is soft.
 Your package looks promising.
 D There's nothing on TV
 OThe kids are asleep.
 OMy parents are out.
 O My hand's getting tired.
 OThird base is getting old.
 The birds and the bees do it.
 DI have a medical condition
 To manage stress.
 Because 1 did the dishes
 My vocal cords need exercise.
 The sock is on the doorknob.
 It's my birthday.
 It's your birthday.
 It's someone's birthday.
 OYou're sexy AF
 Because our therapist said so
 DI have excellent stamina
 Ojust finished the Kama Sutra.
 You look like you need it.
 You're a good human.
 Ive been Kegeling.
 DI have ten minutes to kill
 OWe're here and we're queer
 To break in my new car.
 O My blowup doll sprung a leak.
 I'm polyamorous.
 aI had a dream about you.
 OMeditation makes me homy.
 Dljust popped a Viagra.
 Our bodies fit.
 To scratch my itch.
 To increase my resistance.
 Oike your you-know-what.
 You've got a big...brain.
 OWe're human.
 Why not?
 WITH SUGAR ON TOP
 PRETTY PLEASE
 PLEASE
 IWON'T BEG
 YEAR
 DAY
 MONTH
 SIGNATURE
 "WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?
awesomage:

Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist

awesomage: Why I Must Have Sex With You Checklist