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30 seconds: wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you
30 seconds: wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you

wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and get...

30 seconds: if u didnt spend 6 hours automating a task that takes you 30 seconds did you really do work
30 seconds: if u didnt spend 6 hours automating a task that takes you 30 seconds did you really do work

if u didnt spend 6 hours automating a task that takes you 30 seconds did you really do work

30 seconds: Yeah you can obviously break into CIA servers in 30 seconds
30 seconds: Yeah you can obviously break into CIA servers in 30 seconds

Yeah you can obviously break into CIA servers in 30 seconds

30 seconds: elidyce: luckyladylily: ohnoagremlin: itsvondell: off-in-lala-land: You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d rip the game from his hands, stash it in my backpack, and force him to enjoy history goddamnit. This vacation cost a lot and the game is only for the hotel and travel time. imagine trying to force someone to think that stonehenge is fun take your kids places they actually want to go instead of getting mad when they quietly self-entertain, he’s not hurting nobody. me & my shitbag siblings would be climbing that fucking thing, gameboy kid is doing alright Some small child: does not yet have the mental development or contextual understanding to appreciate why these particular rocks are extra interesting. Some adult: God I hate that children don’t think like adults! I would force them to pretend they do because I interpret child thought patterns as a personal insult! Child: *looks at rocks for approx. 30 seconds, listens to vaguely interesting story about them for another minute or so, glances at the rocks again, is Now Done. Parent: I understand that your attention span has done all it can with the stimulation provided. Here is your gameboy to keep you entertained while the adults talk about things you don’t find interesting, like the history of very large rocks. Child: *quietly squats down and plays with the gameboy, allowing adults to enjoy their rocks* Parent: I am very glad that I understand to some extent how children’s minds work, or this holiday would be a miserable experience for both of us. How fortunate that I planned ahead to allow my child periods of rest and quiet entertainment during excursions that are primarily for my benefit and enjoyment.
30 seconds: elidyce: luckyladylily: ohnoagremlin: itsvondell: off-in-lala-land: You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d rip the game from his hands, stash it in my backpack, and force him to enjoy history goddamnit. This vacation cost a lot and the game is only for the hotel and travel time. imagine trying to force someone to think that stonehenge is fun take your kids places they actually want to go instead of getting mad when they quietly self-entertain, he’s not hurting nobody. me & my shitbag siblings would be climbing that fucking thing, gameboy kid is doing alright Some small child: does not yet have the mental development or contextual understanding to appreciate why these particular rocks are extra interesting. Some adult: God I hate that children don’t think like adults! I would force them to pretend they do because I interpret child thought patterns as a personal insult! Child: *looks at rocks for approx. 30 seconds, listens to vaguely interesting story about them for another minute or so, glances at the rocks again, is Now Done. Parent: I understand that your attention span has done all it can with the stimulation provided. Here is your gameboy to keep you entertained while the adults talk about things you don’t find interesting, like the history of very large rocks. Child: *quietly squats down and plays with the gameboy, allowing adults to enjoy their rocks* Parent: I am very glad that I understand to some extent how children’s minds work, or this holiday would be a miserable experience for both of us. How fortunate that I planned ahead to allow my child periods of rest and quiet entertainment during excursions that are primarily for my benefit and enjoyment.

elidyce: luckyladylily: ohnoagremlin: itsvondell: off-in-lala-land: You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d...

30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes awesomacious: Sweet Keanu
30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes awesomacious: Sweet Keanu

awesomacious: Sweet Keanu

30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes awesomacious: Sweet Keanu
30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes awesomacious: Sweet Keanu

awesomacious: Sweet Keanu

30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes Sweet Keanu
30 seconds: 18 02:56 ....ll Thread James Dator @James.. 17 May In honor of John Wick 3 I have a Keanu Reeves story 615 ti 19.2K 54.3K James Dator @James.. 17 May Keanu came to the movie theater I worked at in Sydney in 2001. He was working on the Matrix series at the time. It's a quiet, Wednesday morning almost nobody is seeing movies. 6 C t524 8,415 James Dator @James.. 17 May I'm working the box office, bored as hell and suddenly this dude walks up in jeans, a leather jacket and a horse riding helmet. A full ass, weird equestrian looking helmet. It takes me a solid 30 seconds to ignore the helmet and realize it's Keanu Reeves 7 1450 8,840 James Dator @James 17 Mayv He wants to buy a ticket for "From Hell," the Johnny Depp movie. I'm so fucking star struck I do what any sensible 16-year-old does and tell him l'd like to give him my employee discount. This means he needs to sign my sheet and therefore I have his autograph 5 8,595 t439 James Dator @James. 17 May "I don't work here," Keanu says. Seemingly confused by my offer. I'm flustered and just charge him the normal price. Kicking myself after for not getting his autograph 9 8,300 t 410 James Dator @James.. 17 May 2 minutes later there's a knock on the door behind me that leads into the box office. I assume it's my manager. It's Keanu. 94 t 409 8,297 17 May "I realized you probably wanted my autograph," he says. "So I signed this." He hands me a receipt from the concessions stand that he signed on the back. He then casually throws an ice James Dator @James... cream cone in the trash can and sees his movie 26 t 639 13.8K James Dator @James Dator realize later that he bought an ice cream cone he didn't want, just to get receipt paper so he could scribble his autograph for a 16-year-old idiot. 19:21 17 May 19 Twitter for iPhone 2,750 Retweets 60.6K Likes Sweet Keanu

Sweet Keanu